"suddenly the moment is here. i embrace my fears. all that i have been carrying all these years. do i risk it all? come this far just to fall?"

christina aguilera — "bound to you"

LUCIFER.

"Teddy!" I hear Lilith say as she goes after her little brother out of her house. "It will fit!"

The moment I step out of my Honda, my eyes have to take a moment to process everything that's happening around the Avery house. The strange air around Forwell has definitely been here, stronger than ever.

Lilith, as she walks down the stairs to follow a very quick Teddy, who apparently disappeared on the right side of the house towards the back, has a head costume of a chicken between her hands. Not very strange, if you ask me. I'm starting to get used to the surprise that is Lilith Avery, but when she drops the head on the floor, and ties her curly hair in a bun, her expression of "I mean business" does scare me a bit.

"You little bastard, come back!" Lilith yells while staring to the right. She's to focused on Teddy to even notice me standing behind her enjoying their little show.

"No!" I hear Teddy yell from a distance. "I look ridiculous!"

"You always look ridiculous!"

"Don't be mean!"

Lilith fake chuckles. "If you don't want me to be mean, Teddy, try the costume on!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"Lilith!" Celia's voice comes from inside the house. Somehow, she manages to be heard. "Where's Teddy?"

"The annoying Teddy doesn't want to try the costume!"

"Why not? Teddy!"

"It's too big!"

"How do you know it's too big of you haven't tried it yet?"

Teddy doesn't respond immediately, which makes Lilith feel impatient as she moves her foot up and down repeatedly. "Well?!"

"I already tried it on!" Teddy finally yells back, embarrassed. "And it's to big!"

This time, Lilith is the one that doesn't reply. Her eyes squint as if she's process something, and takes a step closer to where Teddy's voice is coming from. "Wait.." She says to herself. For the way that her attention is focused on the right side of the house, allows me to understand what's she thinking, she knows the reason why Teddy ran away and hid. And maybe I do too. "Do you have the costume on right now?"

Even if Teddy doesn't reply, I can still sense a glimpse of embarrassment in the air coming from him.

"Teddy!" When Lilith takes another step forward, a quick sound coming from far ahead stops her.

"Don't come here!"

"Why not?"

"I told you, I look ridiculous!"

"Teddy." Lilith holds a laugh in. "I've changed your dirty diaper when you were a little ugly human, cleaned your disgusting tissues full of buggers when you were sick, and I have seen you with your Hannah Montana underwear, a ridiculous chicken costume is nothing—"

"You'll laugh! And, to be fair, Hannah Montana is the best Disney show and I'm proud of my underwear!"

"There's no doubt that I agree with the last part, I'm the one that introduced you to that show, remember? But not the first one, I won't laugh, I promise.." Even if she tries to sound genuine, my eyes catch a smirk appearing on the corner of her lips.

"Fine..." Teddy finally accepts. Soon after, him, with a chicken costume that could fit five more people like Teddy, walks out embarrassed from his hidden spot.

His lower part of his face is covered by the top part of the costume. The big feet of the chicken are bigger than Teddy himself, and a part of me wonders how's he walking and not tripping, but he does, carefully in each big step after the other one. Chicken hands rounder than his head, three times bigger, that when he tries to swipe the sweat from his forehead, he slaps himself on the face and stumbles backwards.

Lilith quickly swings her hand to her mouth, covering it to prevent a loud laugh from jumping out.

"You promised that you weren't gonna laugh!" Teddy complains as he tries to turn around to go back to his prior hidden place, but when the costume takes over him, his feet tangle within themselves and it makes him lose the tiny balance that he had. When Teddy falls to the floor and his head disappears inside the costume, the laugh from Lilith wins and it's all that can be heard.

I find myself smiling at the sound of her happy laugh, soon joined by a warm feeling inside my chest, the same one that I used to get when the whistle hit my ears to end the fight and the referee lifted my hand in the air to announce my win.

"Lilith!" Teddy's voice echoes inside the costume as he tries to get up, but the heavy weight of it enables him. "Stop laughing!"

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" She holds her stomach in pain. "It was just so fucking funny!"

When the front door of the house swings opened, Celia walks through it with her eyes already on her laughing daughter. My attention shifts down to something that grabs my attention in a quick look, a bandage covers Celia's hand. I've seen that type before, where the wound in the skin isn't something deep, but worth the cover. I wonder what happened to her.

"What's all this laughing?" She asks as she's going down the stairs. Soon, with her eyes on Teddy, who's still trying to get up, she walks towards him. "Teddy? What happened?"

When my eyes go back to the struggling Teddy, the first thing I see is not his body laying on the floor being taken over by the costume, instead, is the big chicken butt in the air, somehow, that position helped him leave the floor. "Lilith is a terrible sister."

Celia grabs Teddy's arm to help him get his balance back.  "You don't mean that."

"Yes I do!"

Finally, regaining her control, Lilith stops her laugh. "I'm sorry! When a little brother falls it's my duty as a big sister to laugh uncontrollably."

True.

"The costume..." Celia stares at Teddy up and down. From the corner that I'm standing, I catch the smile that she's trying to hide. "It isn't that bad!"

All I can see from Teddy is his eyes closing and his eyebrows furrowing. "Don't lie to me, mother."

"We can make it work!"

"The parents are gonna think I'm gonna grab their kids and put them inside the costume with me. We won't get any stars."

"It's better than nothing."

"Nothing means that I get to not feel ridiculous, so," Teddy, with huge steps, leaves towards the stairs and front door "I vote for nothing!"

"Oh, c'mon!" Lilith complains, but doesn't follow her little brother.

"I'm not gonna land you my Captain America comic now, Lilith!"

"Just because of a laugh?!"

But Teddy doesn't respond, he disappears inside the house. When my attention shifts to Lilith, a tight nod troubles my chest hating to see her like that. Disappointed eyes and not the excited smile that she had a minute ago, Lilith stands there like she's realising her weekend in Forwell may not be what she was expecting.

"We might have to skip the award this year, Lil." Celia gives Lilith a sweet smile while taking the chicken head away from her hands and then heading her way back to the house.

"But we never do..." Lilith's soft tone grows the urge in me to grab her and hug her body. Change everything that's making her feel disappointed and sad. I too stand there, as the wonder on how could I do it runs through my head.

"More time for you to study!" Celia yells before disappearing inside the house, just like Teddy did. 

Lilith tilts her head back and closes her eyes. "Yay..."

The realisation that she still doesn't know I'm standing there behind her stops me from going closer and hugging her tightly, may freak her out... who am I kidding, it's Lilith that we're talking about. She'd probably kick me in the balls or not even react at all.

"When has the Honda came back?!" A familiar woman's voice yells on the neighbours' house by the left side.

"Honda?" Lilith asks, confused, as she opens her eyes wide and turns around to look for my Honda.

Don't want to stand there like an idiot when no "hello" comes out of my mouth, but when Lilith shows in her eyes a sparkle of excitement as she expects to find my Honda, does make me take a moment to not smile like a stupid boy in love.

"Hi Lucifer!" Celia's loud voice sounds from inside the house the moment a couple of loud and excited steps go towards my parked motorcycle. Finding Lizzy Jefferson with her now pink hair and red lips that go with her jacket, dark glasses and tight leather pants, looking at it with such passionate eyes does make me realise that a part of me, missed this town.

"Hi Celia!" I yell back. My voice makes Lilith turn to where my body stands and grow a big smile as soon as she lands her eyes on mine. With her freckles show more under the sun hitting her skin and her messy single curls falling on her face, she walks over to me.

Fuck. She's so fucking gorgeous.

"Lucifer... when did you get here?"

Finally, as I hug her, feeling like a cold rain after weeks of endless heat, her arms wrap around my waist to bring me closer and for me to do the same. "When you were almost chasing Teddy with a chicken head."

"Oh..." she chuckles "I promise I'm a good sister."

"I believe you." I stare down at her and those dark eyes, cold like a night in winter. "When Vienna got hit by a volleyball in the cheek and got a bruise I laughed for like a week."

"Are we assholes?"

"No," I slowly nod, bringing our noses together "just the big siblings."

A wave of electricity runs through my cold blood when Lilith smiles at me, deeply, hitting me in such a good way that it reminds when Griffin would place ice in my wounds every night after a fight, freezing my body until it goes numb.

My lips don't wait a second, they get closer and join lips with Lilith's. The taste of cherry from a chapstick is the first thing that mine can notice. Her fingertips trace down my waist and then up to my lower back, asking me to get even closer. I do as she says, and grab her cheeks with both of my hands to keep Lilith in place.

Our lips don't have trouble keeping up with a rhythm, they're used to each other in the beautiful way of a plug knowing that it has to charge battery when it's connected to electricity.

Lilith's mouth goes a bit wide, letting my tongue join hers and caress each other in a slow motion. The more we spend in this kiss, the more we can both feel how much desire our bodies have for the other, wanting to tear each other's clothes right here.

Shit, I want her so fucking bad, man.

"Lucifer!" When Lizzy calls my name behind us, Lilith breaks the kiss and rests her forehead on my chest, covering her laugh against my body. "Did you change the sit?!"

I close my eyes and let a long breath out my mouth, hating that our moment was interrupted. Still, how Lilith manages to find the funny in this situation steals a smile from my lips. "No, I haven't, Mrs. Jefferson!"

"My day has definitely improved, man!"

Lilith leaves my chest to lock eyes with me, but her lips get my attention. "I think Lizzy is gonna cheat on Johnny with your Honda... hey, my eyes are up here, Donovan."

There's no words that could possibly come out of my mouth and win this for me, because, well, me smirking at her and then biting my lower lip has Lilith already smiling and rolling her eyes.

"Asshole."

"Sure." I nod. "This asshole will leave Lizzy alone with the motorcycle and take you to your room."

Lilith's left eyebrow arches. "You just got here and you already want to take me to my room, Donovan? Do I need to remind you that you still have one day of "no sex"?"

I brush our noses together, smirking at the sight of her eyes shifting down to my lips. "And do I need to remind you that I don't need to move to make us feel good?"

"You're impossible."

"Yeah..." my thumb slowly traces down to her neck as my eyes follow it.

"No sex..." even if Lilith tries to sound firm, when my thumb presses down enough on the skin of her neck, she can't help but smile and fade away her words as she speaks.

"We're not gonna have sex, I know." I nod. "We're in your family's house." Going back to her eyes, I don't find them in mine, but on my lips. A smirk grows. "Tell that to your eyes, Avery, they want me kissing you..." I bring them closer to her skin "everywhere."

"Stop." She slaps me on the arm as she snaps out from her trance. "You're an idiot."

"Say that again."

A chuckle wins and escapes her. "No..."

She tries to step back but my hands stop her, flying down to her waist. "Kiss again, then? Or is your mom gonna kill me if she sees us?"

"No, she will start clapping, though."

"Why?"

"She knew this was gonna happen, us, and she hasn't said it yet, but I know she's dying to say "I told you so.""

For my surprise, Lilith is the one that kisses me. She joins our lips in a quick kiss, without erasing the cocky smile in her lips. "And don't play smart, Donovan, you and me both know that if my eyes said "fuck me" you'll be lifting me up and doing as I say."

I don't open my mouth. She's right.

"Look at those shiny wheels!" Lizzy is still admiring the Honda like it's the first time she sees it, when Lilith steps away after grabbing my arm and pulling me towards the house.

"C'mon, she's not gonna stop."

When we walk through door, Teddy... well, half of Teddy since his head is covered by the inside of the costume, hands Lilith a comic book.

"Here. Mom made me give it to you anyway." He sounds defeated, even if a glimpse of embarrassment still shines through. Reminds me of Vienna stealing a shirt from Mylah and then returning it after a big fight.

"Don't lie," Lilith grabs the comic book with her right hand while her left one makes a mess of Teddy's curls "you want me to read it because you can't wait to discuss it with me, your favourite person to talk about Marvel with."

"No..." Teddy's eyes shift down to the floor, snitching on himself that his big sister is right. "Oh, shut up..."

When he turns around leaving us behind, Lilith grabs my hand once again after dropping the comic on the sofa, she lands it perfectly like a basket ball on a hoop. Leading our way to the kitchen, on the right side of the house, Celia is facing us with her back as she seems to be preparing something on the counter. The sound of a tea spoon hitting a cup sounds first, then the realisation of Lilith not feeling freaked out over the fact that she's holding my hand in front of her family hits me second.

I have to prevent myself from smiling.

"Want a cup of tea?!" Celia's yell sounds as if she believes we're still out on the patio. Don't know how she manages it, but it reminds me of coach, feeling like the walls could break at any moment from her firm voice.

"Yes!" For my surprise, Lilith doesn't correct her or even lower her voice, she copies her mom's tone.

Like mother like daughter.

"Ok!" This time, not to much for my surprise (slowly getting used to their dynamic), when Celia hears her daughter being a couple of steps away, she doesn't lower her tone either.

Now with a cup between her hands, Lilith points with her head to the door on the right side of the kitchen.

"Wait, wait!" Celia stops Lilith from walking away. "Lucifer! Your tea!"

Grabbing the cup Celia hands me, the warmth of the cup gets immediately shaken by the fact that Lilith grabs my hand and walks me towards her room. "Thank you!" I manage to say before Lilith closes the door behind us.

"Three inches!" I hear Celia yell on the other side.

"I've never listened to that rule!" When Lilith goes to her bed on the left corner of the room, my body doesn't follow her since my eyes are to focused on seeing her room for the first time.

When someone leaves for college the first thing you expect if for your room to be empty, every belonging you have you take it with you, except for your bed and a couple of other furniture. But Lilith's room is full is pictures, clothes on a chair by the right corner, make up on the night stand with a... duck lamp beside it all. Not gonna ask. Then, her closet on the wall in front of her bed is opened like she was just looking for something through it. It looks like a typical teenager room that you expect to see.

"Still, three inches!" Celia's yell comes our way once again.

I turn to Lilith now laying on her back on the frame of the bed as her cup of tea is on the nightstand. "What's three inches?"

"Your cock."

She didn't even hesitate.

"C'mon," she points to her bed serious as if she didn't land a joke a minute ago "we're not fifteen, you can sit in my bed with me, my mom won't ground us."

"Three!" Celia's voice sounds far away, like she's in the living room by now.

"Ok!" Lilith replies with the exact same tone. Doing as she says, I walk my way towards her bed and sit in front of her with my back laying on the wall. "Every time I had a boy over, she wanted me to have my door three inches opened."

I arch an eyebrow. "And you "never followed that rule?""

"No, and she never argued because she trusted me that I'd never have sex with her in the house." Innocently, she shrugs her shoulders when the smile that she grows on her lips isn't the type that a innocent daughter would give. Definitely. "But that was when I was a teenager."

My eyebrows can't help but lift themselves as my ears hear what Lilith just said. "Is that what I think it means, Avery?" I lean over to her while leaving my cup of tea next to hers. She chuckles teasingly and that gives me the hint to rest my left elbow on the side of her body as she leans down and be able to leave deep kiss on her.

Her hands grab my cheeks to pull me closer, and her legs crossing as they lay on the bed for my arm to be able to touch her waist, it allows me to feel the urge to have her right on this bed cruising on my blood. Breaking the kiss, the shine in her eyes and her thick lips almost opened, don't help me on keeping my rule from the nurse alive.

"Love." I call her as my thumb from the hand on her waist sneaks up under the shirt and caresses the skin underneath. Lilith's letting a long breath out from my touch and her eyes leading down to my lips, makes me understand that she wants me to kiss her again. Without waiting a second, I do it.

Cold and firm, her lips follow mine in a quicker rhythm than before. A reflex moves my body, both of my hands fly to her waist and pull her down for her back to rest on the bed as her legs go opened to welcome me in between them.

It's clear that we're forgetting where we are and the people that are outside this room. A part of me is worried about any noise that could give what we're doing away, but the other part of me, needs to have Lilith right now. And, to be honest, that part of me is winning over anything.

"Lucifer." Lilith breaths out after breaking our kiss apart. My elbows rest on the side of her head to have her closer to me, almost brushing our noses together allowing me to see her eyes in a deeper way, and finding that she still has that shining in her eyes but they're locked on mine this time, it holds me tightly in my place to hear her words. "We can't.."

I unite our lips together but break it soon after. "Why not?" There's no way I'm gonna admit those words came out more needy that I intended them to.

"No—" me slowly kissing her again gains a little laugh from her "sex—"

"The nurse said that I shouldn't have sex, she didn't said you shouldn't." She smiles at me. That kind of smile that makes me melt, makes my body not under the command of my brain because it's ready to say whatever Lilith says. "Should I get my rings off or...?"

The chuckle she gives to my words sounds around the room. "No..."

I arch my eyebrow. "No?"

Lilith's gently places her hand on my chest. "Not right now."

Without erasing the smile from her face, she leans up and pushes her body upwards leading mine to do the same and sit done like I was before. I don't question her reason why she's denying us having sex or even more than just kissing, maybe because her family is outside this room, or because the nurse said that it could hurt my wound, but from the way that she has her eyes glued to her bed sheets and then my hands, it makes me wonder if something deeper is the reason why.

"Our first time..." looks like Lilith is gonna answer. My lips go shut together with strength, knowing that this may be hard for her to say, so, I give her the space to do it. No matter how long it can take. "Since we decided to give this a try, I want it to be... uhm, I don't know, special? I guess. Alone, not worrying about anything outside of... us. Not having to worry about my family hearing what we're doing." She chuckles sweetly. "If that makes sense."

It makes perfect sense. Finally, her eyes lock on mine hoping to find an answer that comes out of me. But I don't force any words out, I just lean closer again to join our lips in a kiss. Sweet and gentle for her to understand that even if she asked me to wait a month, a year, five years, I'll wait. Because she's worth it all.

"Three!" Now is Teddy who yells on the other side of the door.

Our kiss gets stopped by Lilith and I chuckling at a protective Teddy.

"Fuck off Teddy!"

"Mom's wondering if Lucifer's gonna stay for dinner!"

"Yes, he is!" Lilith replies for me.

"Fine!"

"Fine, you idiot! Now go!"

"You go!"

"To where?! I'm already in my room, dumbass!" Silence comes from the other side of the door. "Yeah, that's what I thought! Now go google good comebacks!"

"Shut up!" And those words are followed by quick steps and a chuckle from Celia in the kitchen.

"It's a good thing my two kids love each other."

Lilith nods as she grows a sweet smile on her face. "With all my heart."

Remembering Celia in the next room to ours, the image of her covered hand goes back in my mind. "What happened to your mom?"

"She's fine, fell at work. The chicken costume was supposed to be worn by her for the event tomorrow night but because of that, she won't be able to. That's why Teddy tried it on. I would wear it but I'm in charge of the basket ball stand this year." Lilith is good a reading other's people expressions, but I'm able to catch them sometimes, when she shifts her eyes to the bed once again and a glimpse of sadness shines on the way they slowly move around the sheets allows me to feel the disappointment she must have because of the event going bad for her.

"What's the event for?" I ask, hoping to know more about it and somehow find a way to make it better.

"Charity. It's one of my favourite because it's one of the oldest ones, and, the first one mom, Teddy and I participated in. Adults basically dress as chickens and play around with the kids, make them have fun and play the games. Every kid holds a star, and to their favourite chicken that star goes." She goes back to me as she forces a smile in, and that, makes me hate even more the fact that I can't cure it. "Mom won the last two events. She's good like that, the best chicken out there. But, this year won't happen, we'll just... go and be like everyone else, I guess. Like mom said, better than nothing."

"I'll wear the chicken costume." I hear myself say. Soon, my brain has to stop for a moment to process what my words just meant.

The shock in Lilith's eyes shine through like me wearing the chicken costume feels like an alternative universe. "What?"

"I'll wear it." I add, confident. "Sounds like fun. And it's gonna make you feel better." It is gonna make her feel better. Suddenly, my idea doesn't sound bad anymore.

"You'd do that?"

I nod. "I'd learn the chicken dance if I have to." Leaning closer to her, I give her a sweet kiss. "Anything for you, love."

The fact that the disappointment in Lilith's eyes quickly fades away, the smile on her lips isn't forced anymore, but bigger than my heart growing in sizes for her, and her giving me another quick kiss in excitement, me wearing the chuckle costume feels like the brightest idea I could ever have.

"Moooooom!" Lilith runs towards the chicken after opening the door of her room. "Lucifer's gonna be chicken!"

I chuckle. That's a sentence I never thought I'd hear.

[...]

The costume is definitely... something. I stare at myself in the mirror on Lilith's room and all I can see before laughing is the round stomach of the chicken costume covering half of my body. The hands are my entire face and the feet could probably take me to my apartment in one big step. Now I get why Teddy was feeling ridiculous.

Hearing a low chuckle coming from the door, recognising it, my attention soon shifts to Lilith with a sweet smile on the corner of her lips. She's trying to hold a laugh in as her eyes stare up and down the costume, her hair falls on her shoulders while her comfortable clothes make her look relaxed and clean. Even if a part of me wants to look at myself in the mirror once again and join in to her laugh, my eyes can't seem to look away from her and her mesmerising look. Don't know how she manages that, even in her most uncaring self, doing nothing to get my attention, she still holds it tightly.

"You look cute." Lilith walks over to where I'm standing and stops behind me, letting me see her in the mirror.

"I'm a chicken."

"A cute chicken." There it is again. That shine in her eyes that makes it all worth it. When another smile escapes her lips, the urge to keep looking at her to sink it in and remember this image of her remains me still. "Thank you for doing this."

Turning around to face her and lean over (what the costume allows me), our noses brush against each other. "That smile is worth it." I whisper out to her, with my eyes locked on her lips growing an even bigger smile.

My heart can't handle when Lilith is the one that joins our lips together. She has done a couple of times by now, but sometimes, it still feels like the first time; making my heart skip a beat and my stomach all nervous, my mind going nuts just like my body asks more of her.

When someone stops by the door, Lilith and I break the kiss to find Teddy on the she of the room with his arms across his chest and eyebrows furrowed. "Is this what it feels like when kids say they saw their mom kissing Santa?"

Lilith chuckles while grabbing a pillow from her bed and throwing at him. "Go!" With ease, Teddy grabs it even if the movement made his curls an even more of a mess before leaving us alone again. "What are you waiting for, chicken boy?" She says, grabbing the stomach of the costume to bring me closer. "Kiss me again." When she kisses me, she soon breaks it. "That's a phrase I never thought I was gonna say."

She laughs. And that feels like the most beautiful place in the world. I kiss her again to feel the softness of her lips against mine, and with a slow yet deep motion, we both make the kiss transport the desire that we have for the other in each other. My hands make the move to touch her, but then my mind makes me brusquely remember the giant chicken hands covering my own. "I want to touch you, Avery," I breath out once I join our foreheads "but it's gonna be weird with the chicken hands."

Lilith, placing both of her hands on my chest (the chicken's chest), she moves a bit away for me to have a full view of her beautiful face. "It's better than you can't, I have to go study and you touching me will keep me from it."

"That sounds like the responsible option."

"I can be responsible sometimes."

I get closer to kiss her again, when another set of steps stop by the door. "Lucifer?" Now is Celia talking, standing by the door.

"We were about to go study." Lilith says, before stepping away from the costume and heading to the door.

"You go," Celia moves aside "I have to tell Lucifer the importance of wearing the chicken costume."

It takes me a second to see if Celia is being serious or not, but from the way she doesn't even give me a smile, it doesn't help me on ease my sudden intrigue on the reason why does she want to talk about me. Maybe the "importance of the chicken costume" is the importance of something else.

Lilith seems confused too. "The what now?"

"Go, go." Celia shushes Lilith away while she just gives me a simple shrug of the shoulders and walks away to the living room. Once the door is closed and Celia stares at me, I feel the same way when mom used to sit down on my bed and said "we need to talk" in the most serious and mysterious way possible. "I lied."

I try my best to not feel like an idiot while Celia is trying to have a serious conversation with me and I'm wearing a huge chicken costume. "About what?"

"I wanted to say thank you."

I slowly shake my head. "There's no need to say thank you..."

"Yes, there is." She stops me. "You're dressing up as a chicken and looking ridiculous for her, to see Lilith happy."

Suddenly, silence surrounds the conversation. It's not like I was expecting my actions to not be understood, why, a stranger in this town decides to wear a ridiculous chicken costume could be the question that many people my have tomorrow night. But the fact that Celia is thanking me for making her daughter happy does built a warm feeling inside my chest, something I can't quite describe yet, but it does feel like when Vienna thanks me for driving her to a party or even April looking at me with shine in her eyes as we arrive to the signing of her favourite book author that I booked tickets for. That feeling of endless love, bigger than anything I could ever do.

"I want to see her happy." I find myself saying, somehow wishing that those words are enough to express what I'm feeling inside for her daughter.

"I know. And I'm thankful for that." Walking towards the bed, she sits down on the edge of it as she looks around the room in a nostalgic way. "Lilith is growing up, soon will be entering a new stage in her life after graduation, and there's no doubt in me that she worries about it, maybe not being able to come here for a while because of work and missing little things that she enjoys. This is the last year she can assure to live it." Going back to me, the moment Celia smiles is like a thousand of words are meant to be said by her doing it. "And you giving this to her when I can't means a lot, more than you can imagine."

My feelings towards Lilith are nothing that words can describe, it's like... no, nothing is enough. No words or even phrases are enough. This much love can never be put into words.

"I love your daughter, Celia. Would do anything for her."

"I'm glad. I'm glad that is you." Even if my body has the urge to sit down next to her and not be standing anymore like an idiot, the reminder of the chicken costume prevents me from doing so. "I've never seen her like this." Celia continues, while I, wish the costume doesn't erase the seriousness in her tone. "She's used to being with Teddy and I, maybe Ada sometimes, but, she has never shown this part of her life to anyone before. She's tough, real tough, but protects her heart with an entire armour. I trust that you're gonna make her happy, Lucifer."

I nod, confidently. "I will."

Even if it's the last thing I do. Even if it means breaking my heart into a million of pieces. Or watching her walk away. I'll do anything for Lilith Avery.

LILITH.

I would be lying to myself if I said that I consumed anything I read in the past fifteen minutes. My head has been wondering why my mom wanted to talk to Lucifer since I walked out of my room, and let's be honest, did someone buy the whole "importance of the costume"? Because I certainly didn't.

I truly need to focus, though. My first final is around the corner and there's still a couple of pages that I still need to get through.

Usually coffee and tears are what helps me study, so, maybe if I grab a cup and then make myself have a mental breakdown over the future, when it's all over, then I'll be able to study.

Yep. That's gonna help me.

When I get up, a familiar man is standing by the edge of the living room enabling me my way to the kitchen.

Rude.

"Hi, Jackson." I say with a smile to gain his attention. He seems a little bit distracted and nervous, like he just got in trouble with his own mother. With his beanie on that he usually wears, his jean jacket and working boots, Jackson turns to me and nervously smiles.

"Lilith! How are you? Everything good?"

"Besides my notes kicking my butt repeatedly, yeah, everything's good." No answer comes from him, just a simple nod and the nerves showing on his body. Wondering why is he being like this, I take a step closer to point with my head towards my room. "Mom's in my room if you're looking for her."

Jackson smiles, playing around with his own fingers. "Oh, ok, thank you." Looking down, he does a quick look to something inside his pocket. I want to see if I could understand what it is, but Jackson turning his body a bit to the opposite side prevents me from doing so.

"Are you alright?" I can't help but ask. "You seem like you just committed a crime and you're coming here to hide. Are the cops after you or something?"

"What?" Jackson's eyes go wide and then soon regains the nervous smile in his lips. Seriously, it looks like me when I was getting ready to ask mom permission about getting my first tattoo at the age of sixteen. "No, no. I mean, yes— I mean yes to the I'm alright, not the cops being after me." Stumbling with his words and realising that he's not hiding the nerves very well, Jackson closes his eyes frustrated. "I didn't sound very convincing, did I?"

"Do you want me to lie?"

Jackson chuckles. "Yes, please."

I give him a thumbs up. "You work very well under pressure."

"I'm sorry. I'm very nervous, actually." Doing a look to my room, Jackson stares at it like he's expecting something to happen. Soon later, he turns to face me again. "Can I talk to you?"

I nod, not sure of what this could be about. "Yeah, sure."

"Can we do it in the patio?"

Alright, he's trying to prevent mom from hearing our conversation, there's no doubt in that. He's nervous, looking around as if he were at the edge, and then asking to talk to me about something something that mom can't know about.

Tell me why am I getting a bad feeling about this. I don't want to, but there's no way I can help it, my experience with mom's boyfriends isn't the best.

"Is it something that I should be worried about?" I ask Jackson as we both walk through the door towards the tiny patio. "Something bad?"

"No, no, it's great." Jackson closes the door behind us. "All happy and exciting." Those are not the feelings he was projecting a minute ago. "Well... only if you say yes."

"Me?"

"I wanted to ask you... well, no, ask your mother..." My attention shifts to his fingers playing around with each other once again, his eyes are not in mine like he's avoiding them and his breathing is quicker than normal "I already talked with Teddy about it and he said that he's on board with...." he stops himself, growing the intrigue in me thousand of inches "it's better if I show you." He looks down and I follow his left hand reaching something inside his pocket, the same one he stared at when he was at the door.

A part of me plays dumb, while the other, knows exactly what he's about to show me.

"This." He says, almost in a whisper.

A tiny blue velvet box is soon in front of me. Looking as soft as a silk dress, and fresh clean sheets, the box in between Jackson's hands gets slowly opened by him letting me see a shiny ring inside. It's not big enough to be the size of mom's nail, but not tiny to the point where you can barely see it, just enough for what mom likes. Delicate yet fancy, a deep shine that even in the dark of the night it can perfectly caught your attention, the diamond the colour white with little gold sparkles, going with the outline of the same mix of colours, depends on what angle you're seeing it. The more I look at it, the more it feels like it's the perfect ring for mom.

No words are find in my brain to say, so, idiot me takes action. I lift an eyebrow. "You're not asking me to marry you, are you?"

Jackson chuckles before closing the box and putting it inside his pocket again. "I love your mother, very, very much. I want to marry her and make her the happiest woman alive... The love that she has for you and Teddy is bigger than any love I could give her, but I want to try." The nervousness in his body hasn't gone away, but still, he manages to sound firm and confident in his words, maybe he practiced them a lot in front of the mirror, maybe he's just coming up with them, either way, there's no part of me that doubts him. And that's definitely new. "I won't do it if you say no because you think this is a bad idea or you don't like me, or even something else. I want your approval before I can move forward with this. Your happiness is also very important to me, in no way I want to disturb it."

Jackson cares about my happiness. No words like that had ever been said to me coming from any of my mom's boyfriends. One asked me about how many Instagram followers I had (still don't know the reason), another one said that I should be an artist because I drew a very pretty stick family, and then another one questioned me about my career choices, because with his beautiful hair, I should be a hair dresser (I always wondered if he says the same thing to bald hairstylists).

And here's Jackson, telling me that, in his own words, he's willing to put his happiness aside until we're all ready to take this step, as a family. He's taking in consideration mine and Teddy's feelings about this, knowing that mom won't move forward if she isn't sure we're alright with it. Mom herself would put her happiness aside by saying no to him if Teddy and I aren't on board, knowing that at the end of the road, it wouldn't be what it's meant to be if we, as a family, aren't happy. I would do the exact same thing, and Teddy would sell his entire comic collection if it meant mom and I being happy. We care so much about each other, that it feels like no one else understand the way we work sometimes.

But Jackson is telling me right now he would do it too, and that, makes me know how they're perfect for each other.

"That's very thoughtful." I finally say, giving Jackson a sweet smile, even if he's drowning in nerves. "You're a nice guy, Jackson, the fact that you even made cereal for Celia's crazy daughter is the proof that I need that you care about mom."

He chuckles. "That was nothing."

"No, it wasn't. Maybe you caught me in a good mood or something because of what I'm about to say, but," I must be high for what it's about to come out of my own mouth, willingly "I like you for mom. You're gonna make her happy and that's all that matters." Trying to calm him, I place my hand in his shoulder to give him a little pat. "I never give compliments to her boyfriends so be proud."

Letting go a long relieved breath, like a balloon, his nerves slowly leave his body. "It means so much that you say this."

"It also means a lot that you care about me, I appreciate it. Things are gonna change, and..." I'm very high, for sure. "that's ok. Go get on one knee, dude."

Brusquely hugging me tightly, Jackson regains the confidence he was lacking when he walked through the door, like a heavy worry had been lifted off his shoulders. "Thank you, thank you, thank you." With all the excitement in the world, he walks towards the door and opens it. "Celia hasn't seen me yet so I'll go and prepare everything."

"I'm sure I'll hear all about it."

Quickly nodding, Jackson disappears from my sight... when he returns again. "Thank you, truly."

I point at him. "I'll wait for more cereal."

"You got it." And off he goes again.

What character he is, huh? He'd make a great cartoon, if you ask me.

What character I am, though, not getting freaked over change and accepting one of mom's boyfriends. What is this? Lilith at the age of six changing her favourite cereal that she has been devouring since she grew her first teeth out?

Lucifer's sitting down on the couch facing me with his back when I go back to the living room and my notes are still there, waiting for me to study them. He's reading something since his head is a bit tilted down. With a bowl of cereal on the coffee table in front of the couch, I squint my eyes, already thinking of lecturing him for eating my cereal.

"Oh, hey." He immediately smiles at me once he sees me by his side. I stare at the bowl of cereal and go back to him. The words are flowing inside my brain, when he grabs the bowl and hands it to me. "Grabbed this for you."

I stand still, thinking his words over and over again.

"Your mom gave me permission to pour you a bowl, I thought it might help you study."

Right when I was ready to lecture him and call him names, he pulls this shit. I grab the bowl, not knowing what to say.

Maybe... thank you?

"Teddy asked me if we wanted to have a movie night tonight." He continues as I sit down next to him, with my legs on the couch. "I said we'd love to but with only one condition, you get to choose the movie... but I will have to leave you alone for a couple of minutes, his comic book collection is amazing— are you alright?"

"What?" I ask brusquely. When I place focus on his face, I find myself realising that I dozed off for a bit tying to process his words correctly. "Yes yes, I'm fine." I feel like Jackson before. "Just worried about finals."

"Then, c'mon" He places my notes on my lap as he does the same with the book he was reading before I can say anything "you read while I do the same, maybe at least two pages we're gonna get through tonight."

I nod, sitting back on the couch when my eyes look down to the papers now on my lap. Lucifer looks away too, placing his entire focus on his studying.

I don't. Not a chance.

First of all, the fact that he grabbed me a bowl of cereal? It's not that big of a deal if you don't like cereal with your entire being. But, I do! Asking permission to my mother to be able to do something that would help me study. Then, telling Teddy that I should be the one choosing the movie, which, of course, that's what I always try to do, and I didn't even tell him. And the biggest of all, he's gonna be the chicken! Dressed in a ridiculous costume , let's be honest, it is ridiculous, just because he wants to see me smile.

It's the little things, isn't it?

Just like Jackson taking the time to talk to Teddy and I before proposing to mom, making sure to grow a relationship with us because he knows how much mom cares about us and our family comes first.

Or me... didn't realise it until now, but grabbing his hand in front of my family, going to James' house to have dinner with him, letting him see a part of me that no one else knows, expect for Ada, that has been in my life for four years but has become my greatest friend that I would give my life for. Little thing that sometimes, can't be seen in the big picture, but that doesn't mean they're not there. Maybe my part isn't the most deepest things one can do, but for me, they are. They're the first time, and looking at everything behind me, in my past, it's like I'm confessing my love little by little.

Uf, that's big, man.

The three letter word that I want to say, that it's certain my body feels for him, but it's harder than saying "I don't like cereal" for me. Harder than putting my pride aside and letting Teddy know he's right about something we argue.

I love him.

Even my heart jumps at the thought of it. My eyes shift their attention to Lucifer, who has his entire focus on the book between his hands. He looks so magical, like art freshly painted, shining with the thin light of the room hitting it, with his curls falling on his face and his cheekbones that couldn't be more perfect, jawline of the gods, and lips that not matter what they're doing, grow the need in me to unite them with mine. The couple of freckles around his nose, almost transparent, his long eyelashes that move while he blinks and the tip of his chin, relaxed as he reads. His fingers tips moving slowly, his middle one, playing around with the edge of the book, softly and gently, making my heart flutter at the thought of it touching my skin. The veins in his hands and the rings around his fingers, grabbing the attention of my eyes like a mesmerising spell, where no matter how much I try, I want to keep looking at it until there's no longer air to breathe.

I love him.

My brain says again making my breathing quicker. I do, there's no doubt in that. I do love him and the fact that my brain isn't freaking out while thinking about it, makes me smile to myself as my eyes don't stare away from the man that has my heart.

"Is your final about Lucifer Donovan?" He cockily asks, locking eyes with me. "Because you can't seem to look away from me, Avery."

I don't reply to his words, since the same three ones are running wild inside my head. "Are you alright?" I may look nervous, smiling or even excited, I don't know, and Lucifer does seem a bit confused too.

"Why are you smiling like that? Are you planning my murder or something?" I could hear him talk all day, with his raspy and deep tone, Lucifer's voice feels like music to my ears.

Fuck.

I love him.

I don't know if it's my childhood house that always brings good feelings to me, but it's not terrifying to say those three words anymore.

"Lucifer..." I manage to say. "I—" when the door bell rings and stops me from saying anything else.

"Baby!" I hear my mom calling me from the kitchen. "Can you get that!?"

I sigh. Maybe it wasn't the right time, anyway.

Getting up with Lucifer's confused eyes following me, I walk to the door wondering who rings the door bell in this town, everyone just bangs the door and yells their names.

The door is opened. My eyes land on the person that's on the other side. Well, two. But it's takes me a minute to process if what I'm seeing is real or not.

I take a deep breath in, before letting out the name that I thought I'd never have to say again. "Joyce?"

...