The rest of the evening was like a Monet. I can't tell you exactly what happened minute-by-minute, but standing back, thinking about the evening as a whole, it was all sorts of lovely. After dinner, the whole family gathered in the living room and played the game Life. I hadn't played it since I was a kid, and it had never been my favorite, but tonight it felt particularly meaningful.

Mallory had to duck out early when her friends showed up at the front door to go trick-or-treating. I gave her a tight hug before she left—she looked at me strangely as I did so, her beard rubbing off a little on my shirt—and then scurried off into the night with her friends.

Evan, meanwhile, kept sending me inquisitive looks all evening, as if waiting for me to open up and spill my secrets. Sorry Ev, I thought. I can't tell you everything... Plus you wouldn't believe me if I did.

At some point we transitioned to watching a movie. My dad wanted to put on a horror film, but I vetoed that in the light of me about to enter my very own horror movie at midnight, and somehow got everyone to agree on Hocus Pocus. We laughed and joked and I was filled with childhood nostalgia as we watched the film, but I kept getting distracted, kept glancing around the room at my parents cuddling on the couch, on Evan popping fun-sized Twix bars into his mouth, his wrapper pile slowly building. It took a lot for me to not burst into tears at the smallest things, like my mom offering to make some popcorn, or my dad reminding me to grab a coaster for my mug of tea so I didn't leave stains on the end tables.

Then, as 11:30 rounded the corner, James announced that it was time for us to head out. My mother bundled us both in thick jackets meant for arctic survival. Normally I would protest, but I spent every second lingering in her touch, hoping that I didn't truly have to leave, and wondering if I would ever see her again.

I also remembered to put on a pair of worn sneakers. Lana had said there was going to be a lot of walking; I hoped these would do.

Finally, I gave my family a few tight hugs each, hugging Evan last.

"You sure things are okay?" he whispered in my ear.

"Love you Ev," I whispered back, unable to answer him honestly.

Then, hiding my tears, I ran out the door with James. At some point, you have to just rip the bandage off.

I didn't look back.

"Where are we going?" I mumbled into the tall collar of my jacket and rubbing at my eyes as we walked further and further from the life I knew.

James pulled out the ticket to the Underworld and looked at the tiny font. "Gilman Pond."

I crinkled my nose. "Gilman Pond?"

"It's what your ticket says."

Ticket or no ticket, Gilman Pond was a tiny manmade puddle with a small gazebo and way too many ducks. I remembered going there as a child and feeding bread to the ducks with my parents, only to have a swan nibble at my fingers. It hadn't hurt, but when you're three feet tall, swans are scary. I had been scared of swans for many years afterwards.

I didn't know how that small pond could be the entry to the Underworld—unless that swan was some sort of demon gatekeeper—but I kept my mouth shut and trudged forward.

"Gilman Pond..." I murmured, suddenly remembering my conversation with Taylor from earlier in the day. Clarissa and I are gonna walk around Gilman Pond.

I hadn't talked to her all day, not since our fight on the phone. And now I was marching to my death, leaving all of that unresolved.

I pulled out my phone and stared at her number. I wanted to call her to apologize, but I had a sinking suspicion that she wouldn't pick up. And if she did, I knew the conversation would be long, and I just didn't have that sort of time. So instead, I wrote her a message.

Hey Taylor. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for earlier. I shouldn't have said all those things about Clarissa. I was just jealous. You're lucky to have found someone who makes you so happy and makes you feel supported. And I just want you to be happy. I'm so sorry. Then, as I felt a tear roll down my cheek, I typed, I love you. And I hit send.

We were drawing closer to the park. I could make out the dim outline of the gazebo, and moonlight lit up the pond water, making it shine.

"If everything goes according to plan," I asked James, my mouth dry, "how long will I be gone for?"

James looked thoughtful. "I can't be sure. Time passes differently between realms. It might feel like you're down there for months, and up here time has hardly progressed. Or vice versa."

His answer wasn't particularly helpful, but it gave me the nerve I needed to send a final text:

Hey Alex. Just wanted to say that I really enjoyed hanging out with you at the dance, even with everything that happened... I was just wondering if you'd like to go on a date next week?

Faced with impending doom, asking Alex out suddenly seemed a lot more manageable.

I was surprised to get a response almost immediately. Yeah, I'd like that. What day works for you?

Unclear, I typed as we walked on the grass. But I'll get back to you when I can.

It wasn't a lie.

There were a ton of other people I wanted to reach out to, but I didn't have time or the energy to say goodbye a hundred more times. And I was tired of stalling; I wanted to get this over with. So I slid my phone into my pocket and stared out at the park.

The picnic tables looked older than I remembered, and the pond water was dirtier. There were less ducks around too. I wondered if some of them had already begun their southbound migration. Or maybe some of them had just shriveled up and died since my childhood. The few that remained were sleeping right now, curled up into little tufts of feathers that James and I carefully avoided.

I stood at the edge of the water, watching it ripple with the wind.

"Are you ready?" James asked, passing me the ticket.

I breathed deeply. "What do I do?"

He checked the time, then chose a picnic bench near the water and told me to lie down on top. "You need to leave your body behind to enter the Underworld."

I blinked at the moon. "I do?"

James stared at me. "I thought it was obvious. Only souls can enter the other realms."

"What's going to happen to my body while I'm gone?"

"You'll be like Billy, in a coma. But I'll keep an eye on your body to make sure you're okay. If you're gone for too long, I'll call an ambulance and get you to the hospital. And I'll make sure they don't take your organs."

He said it so bluntly that I couldn't help but laugh. It was a nervous laugh, but it was the happiest sound I had made in a while.

"Here," James said, handing me the teddy bear. "Now you're all set. You have the teddy bear and the ticket. Midnight's in five minutes, so just get comfy."

I nodded. The sky was so dark and cloudy that the moon was barely visible, peering out behind a thin layer of fog. I yawned and closed my eyes.

I had almost fallen asleep when I heard the toll of a bell. It started off quietly, then increased in volume with every beat. The last toll was so loud that I felt its vibration run through my body, accompanied by the sudden urge to move. I sat up, startled—and nearly screamed.

Only about half of me had sat up. When I looked down, I could see my physical body, still lying on the picnic table, my face tilted up, eyes closed. But the rest of me was transparent. I stared at my hands, which were foggy wisps of air, hardly visible. And I felt so light, as if I might float if I weren't paying attention.

I was still wearing clothes—they too were transparent now—and the bear and ticket had also managed to come with me. I patted my pocket, however, and my phone was gone.

"Guess phones aren't allowed in the Underworld," I said, but my voice came out as a strange rattle, like the wind dancing through trees.

Through all of this, James was staring down at my body, oblivious to ghost-me climbing out.

"Yo!" I heard suddenly.

I turned my head towards the shout and saw a skinny boat bobbing at the edge of the pond. Sitting in it was a man with a grey hoodie. He gestured at me impatiently.

"You, girl—got a ticket?"

I nodded, holding it up.

He tapped on his thigh impatiently. "Well come on, I ain't got all night."

And so I gingerly stepped all the way out of my body, lightly left the picnic table, climbed into the boat with a stranger, and began my descent into Hell.