I was laying in bed one afternoon on a day off just painting my nails. Ruby red. As the weeks and day's passed, I finally made the decision to drop out of college. A part of me regreted it, the other part of me (John mostly), told me I made the right choice. It definitly relieved some stress off my shoulders.

It was mid July now. At this point, Stuart was the only one of us, getting some kind of education. Paul dropped out, George had dropped out, and I did just a few weeks ago. It was a hard decision but, that part of my life was over.

Things seemed to be hectic lately. John and Paul have been dealing with booking gigs and money issues. George was getting nervous about Hamburg and was still begging his parents to let him go. He was underage so we were going to have to lie again.

I finished up my nails when I heard footsteps coming up the stairs, then a knock on the door.

"Come in."

I looked up to see Paul.

"Oh. Hi Paul."

"Sound a bit disappointed. Maybe if it was George you'd be happier."

I sighed. "Don't start with that again. Look, John left an hour ago to talk to Allan. Don't know when he'll be back so..."

"I came to see you...about Hamburg."

"Um, okay. What about it?"

He sighed and looked down as he spoke. "How do I say this without sounding harsh..uh, I don't want ye to go."

I swallowed and raised my eyebrows. "Wow. Hate me that much don't you."

"No its not that I just think you'd be in the way." He said. I sighed and shook my head.

"I um, I don't know what to say." I felt a little hurt. But also a bit angry. I know me and Paul weren't fully friends yet after that one day but... I didn't know things were this bad.

"Look, it's not you...it's just.."

"What Paul? Is this your way of trying to keep me away from John?? Does he even know about this!?"

"He doesn't need any distractions from you or anyone else. This can be huge for us and he doesn't need his girlfriend getting in the way of all of it. You of all people should understand."

"Look Paul, I know you mean well but I have not once tried to even meddle into the band. I always kept my distance in any decisions he makes."

"All I'm sayin is that, he doesn't need to be tied down and kept on a leash.."

"Is that what you think I do?? Keep him with me all the time!? If you haven't noticed, he spends most of his time with you and the band! I don't even go to the gigs often anymore cause I'm fuckin working!"

"Him and Cynthia used to be.."

I scoffed and stood up. "That's it isn't it!? You just want them together! Admit it! Just cause you and her have become friends doesn't mean John wants her back! If anyone kept him on a leash, it was her! You know that Paul."

He stood up as well. "They were perfect together until you came along! Fuckin christ he's just so stupid he can't open his eyes and realise the mistake he's making!"

"Mis..mistake!? Is that what I am?? Fuck off Paul! John's a big boy he can make his own decisions! I'm going whether you like it or not!"

Just then, we heard the door open and close downstairs.

"Hello!? Anyone home!?" John called out.

"This isn't over." Paul muttered and left the room.

"Up here John." I called out. I heard voices then the front door open and close. I sat on the edge of the bed and shook my head.

What's Pauls problem?? Why doesn't he like me? I never did anything wrong. When we first met things were great. He was always shy around me and even encouraged me to come to gigs. He loved when I'd watch him play in the cafeteria when John would be off with Cyn. It was just us. Then he introduced me to George and..... I showed all my attention to him. I began to ignore Paul and stopped talking to him as much. It was always just Geo and John. Was he...jealous?

"Ello love." John came over to me, kissing the top of my head and laid on the bed. "I could use a nap about now."

"Why don't you? I have a few things I need to take care of anyway. You can sleep." I smiled, playing with his hair.

"Alright. Thanks Luce." He smiled.

I leaned down and kissed him softly, then got up, leaving the room. Now, off to see Paul.

....