Request: So I was thinking you can do something that take place right after the part where Connor chooses not to shook Chloe... I was assigned with Hank and Connor to work on the case since the beginning and me them are already close. I'm a human detective lets say... so after Hank and Connor walked out of the building and talked about why he did it and how Connor showed empathy, I step in when Hank walks off. So maybe i say something like I think it was right what he did and that showing emotions was a good thing and that he was more then just some mindless machine. And sometime in the conversation I say something about how I'm happy he's starting to feel emotions because I have a special feeling towards him that I don't for anyone else and then I kiss him. He's confused after and asked me what love is so I tell him what it feels like... idk use your imagination. And then he feels that way about me and we end up getting together but decided to keep it a secret for their safety - by MendesGrimes16

Fandom: Detroit: Become Human, Connor x fem!reader

Warnings: None, I think?

A/N: Another Connor one :D I hope the next Connor request calms down the Connor request flood for a while, I can't take him much longer XD Almost all the requests I get in here are for Connor.

Again, I edited the ending a bit because I don't think them getting together that fast would be natural. At least if I had a crush on someone and they said they like me too, I don't think I would get together with them right there and then. The requester gave me her blessing for editing :)

+ Please note that I've never been in love with anyone so describing how love feels like was surprisingly difficult to me and I'm sorry if it's a cliche and/or cringe.

Word count: 1,406

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"By the way... I always leave a backdoor for my programming. Who knows... maybe you'll find that useful someday", Kamski's voice echoed through the hall of his home and Connor stared at him with confusion.

"C'mon, Connor." you softly said to him, and you made your way out.

Hank waited for you two outside and he was squinting his eyes on Connor while clearly being in his thoughts. Snowflakes slowly descended from the sky and a cold breeze gently blew against you. Nobody spoke for a moment.

"Why didn't you shoot?" Hank's voice was quiet, full of wonder. He tilted his head, as he continued: "You always say you'd do anything to accomplish your mission. Kamski told you do shoot that girl. She was there, right before your eyes - and you didn't shoot her. Why?"

Connor started moving his head nervously, his LED spinning between yellow and blue with a rapid pace.

"I saw her eyes and I couldn't, I don't know why..." Connor swallowed and let out a shaky breath. "I know I should have done that and my programming told me to do that, but... I still couldn't. I don't know why I didn't, I-" Connor's voice broke mid-sentence and he swallowed, looking at Hank with a look that was a mixture of so many feelings at once, but confusion and fear were the most prominent ones.

Hank raised his eyebrows at Connor and then a small smile spread to his face.

"Well, maybe you did the right thing."

As Hank walked away and Connor was going to follow him, you stopped him for a moment. You had always had feelings for Connor - but at first, you knew you couldn't have him. But now... now Connor had shown to have some kind of moral in him, and that probably wouldn't be a part of his programming. So that made you wonder if... if Connor was a deviant himself. He seemed to be afraid of that thought - maybe it was so because he himself somehow suspected himself to be a deviant. And that was one of his greatest fears, because it would mean failing his mission - something his programming always screamed him to do.

You swallowed hard, waiting for a moment before slowly taking your hand to hold Connor's shoulder. When Connor furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, you smiled a bit and started speaking the words you didn't know to ever be actually said.

"I'm happy that you aren't some mindless machine, if you even ever were that." you began, rubbing Connor's shoulder gently. Connor tilted his head to you.

"But I am a machine." he said, but his voice was unsure, and you noticed his LED blinking red a few times. So you gave Connor's shoulder a little squeeze.

"Don't be afraid, Connor. It's not a bad thing." You smiled. "You have shown empathy multiple times, you have shown mercy."

Connor's eyes slowly looked over your shoulder, and you knew he was checking if Hank was watching you. He swallowed.

"We- We should probably go."

You looked over your shoulder yourself, and saw Hank leaning against his car, browsing something on his work tablet. You knew he wanted you to talk to Connor. And Connor was scared. He was scared that you would get a proof that he was a deviant, he was scared that CyberLife would be informed if he broke out of his programming. He didn't know it - but he was scared to be destroyed. And machines weren't scared of anything. If they were told that they would be destroyed, they would swallow it without any difficulty, without any questions.

But Connor was hiding his deviancy. He was afraid to show it, he was afraid to show his thoughts and feelings to the whole world. And that's why you brought your hand from Connor's shoulder to his cheek, and slowly leaned in to place a light kiss on his lips.

Right after you pulled away, Connor's eyes widened when he realized what had just happened. You saw a faint blush creeping to his cheeks and your head suddenly had a million thoughts racing there - what if Connor didn't like it? What if he liked it and reports to the CyberLife that he fears to be a deviant? What if certain people back at the precinct found out?

"Why did you kiss me?" Connor finally asked and you let out a nervous giggle, not really sure why Connor asked it.

"Because I... I have a special feeling for you, Connor. But.. I'm sorry if you didn't like it."

Connor's eyes wandered to stare at the city peeking from behind of Kamski's house and then he mumbled: "How does love feel like?"

You felt a bit confused about his question, but you also knew that you wouldn't know how it feels like if you hadn't been taught about it before. So you took in a big breath and walked to Kamski's sightseeing place, leaning on the frosty railing which prevented you from going any further to the edge. You pulled your hands inside your sleeves, before glancing at Connor.

"If you love someone, you feel happy every time you look at them. You feel like you'd do anything to them - and the thought of losing them feels unbearable. You'd be willing to run to a snake pit if it meant that you get to be with them. You always want what's best for them. You'd protect them with your life, if you had to. That's how love feels like." You gave Connor a little smile before turning your gaze back to the city. But you saw Connor's LED spinning between red and yellow from the corner of your eye, and saw Connor lowering his head.

"I... I think I feel that way about... you." he slowly muttered and just as a smile spread on your face, his LED spun dark yellow again, and he grabbed your hands. "But if CyberLife finds out, I'm going to be destroyed... and you could get into a lot of trouble because they could see you as guilty for my deviation. I can't risk that, I can't-" you interrupted Connor by raising your hand and offering him a reassuring smile.

"They won't. We're keeping it as a secret. And Connor..." you bit your lip. "Don't be afraid. Androids will get their freedom eventually and then... then you'll get to be whoever you want to be - with whomever you want to be."

Connor looked over to Hank, as he had grown to look concerned. You giggled, knowing what was running there in Connor's head. He turned his gaze to you with wonder in his eyes and you shook your head to him while smiling.

"Don't worry about him. Hank has shipped us from the beginning."

A bright blue blush rose to his cheeks, as he stuttered out: "O-oh."

That snowy day in the front of Kamski's home got Connor's head and thoughts stirring properly for the first time. And for the first time, he knew why he felt that warm sensation in his abdomen every time you looked at him - he loved you. He experienced an emotion he never believed to experience - and even though that made him more scared than ever, his days were brighter than ever before. Emotions had confused him and he still had a lot to learn from them, but they had also brought so much richness to his everyday life.

And eventually, he would be born to be a person of his own. He would have his own personality with faults and strengths, and his own life, and he hoped to spend his life with you. With you, he felt whole, he felt like he was someone and not just something.

And people would see that. Maybe other people would - someday - fall in love with different androids too, and you two wouldn't be the only ones. Maybe there already was such a couple, afraid to come out in fear of judgment. But despite the risks, he wanted to have his life with you. He waited for cuddling with you, kissing you, sleeping with you - he even waited for the fights you would have - because that would be life. And he never knew to crave something so badly.

He'd get a life with you, the one he was never meant to get.