Tuesday morning
11.45 am
Sofitel Fiji, Denarau

Ishita shifted Ishaan on her lap, trying to hold her wriggling son as he tried to get away.

"One more piece kanna" she urged as she tried to get him to open his mouth and finish eating his banana. "No amma, I go chitti" Ishaan had the sweetest temperament out of all four of her children, but he could be as stubborn as his father at times. Now was one of those times.

They were at the Sofitel Fiji resort, on Fiji's mainland, the island of Viti Levu, about 20 minutes seaplane ride away from the Mehta Resort in the Mamanuca islands, where they were staying. Raman and Mihir had arranged to bring the family here this morning for water sports and although she had no desire to be with her husband right now, to spend time with him, she had not objected to the plans for her children's sake.

She had seen Adi's searching glances at her swollen eyes that morning, and she had known she could not make him worry any more. He was still a child. He did not deserve this. So she had put on her make up and her sunglasses and had accompanied them all to Denarau. She had purposefully handed Raashi to Raman on the plane, knowing his daughter would keep him distracted from the anxiety he felt in small planes. Even though she wasn't prepared to talk to him, to listen to him, she could not stop her heart from caring.

Both Raashi and Ishaan had been fractious and hard to manage on the flight. They had woken up late, tired out by the long international flight the day before, the change of weather and the late night, and they had been grumpy all morning, refusing to eat breakfast.

So now, while their papa and chacha were with their didi and bhaiyya on jet skis, she had been attempting to feed her babies some fruit.

Mihika had stayed back with her too, her morning sickness making her nauseous and the idea of jet boats very unattractive. Besides, Mihika was angry with her husband and her jeeju on behalf of her akka, and had no interest in spending time with either of them. So she too had followed her akka' s descent into silence.

They had sat under an umbrella on the beach after waving goodbye to Ruhi and Adi. With them were two babysitters from the island resort, Sera and Lusi, who had accompanied them to the mainland. Raman had arranged for the babysitters for the duration of their stay so that Ishita would have help with the babies, would be able to spend some time in her own. She had been struck by her husband's thoughtfulness, but she was still to angry to acknowledge him and so again she had said nothing to him, had made no protest.

So the little party of women was at the beach and Ishita had spent most of her time trying to feed her over excited little pumpkins, who had recovered from their grumpiness by now. But her babies had seen the water, and it was not easy to hold back two determined toddlers who had only one goal and motive in their mind- to join in the fun and create mayhem in the sea.

She had given up on Raashi ten minutes earlier, allowing Mihika to pick her up and carry her into the sea with her. Her daughter was now happily playing with her chitti, Sera and Lusi in the shallows, her squeals of delight reaching the ears of her twin as his mother tried to feed him one last piece of banana.

She looked out further towards the ocean, at the buzzing jet skis, the paragliders in the air, towed by speedboats, the sailboats whizzing around. She was not too confident in the water herself, since she did not know how to swim, but her older children were strong swimmers and their excitement when they saw all the water sports on offer had been a treat to watch. She worried about them out there. But Raman was with them, Raman would make sure they were both safe. She had no need to worry when Raman was with them.

Raman. She sighed as she thought of her husband. She had avoided his searching eyes all morning, busy attending to the children, communicating through Adi if she needed to. She knew that he kept stealing glances at her, that he was desperate for her forgiveness, for her to get over her hurt. But she needed more time. She did believe that he had not cheated on her physically, but she had been hurt too by his lies of omission. His silence about his past had been a form of deceit and she was not interested in talking to him right now. She needed more time.

"Amma, I go chitttttttti" Big fat tears fell from Ishaan's beautiful big eyes and Ishita gave up. He had eaten most of the banana anyway. It would do until they all met up for a meal. "Allright my darling, at least you've eaten something. Don't cry. Let's go and join chitti" She shushed her baby as she let go of her tight hold on him, and then watched in horror as he took off at a run straight down the beach, before she had even had the chance to get up.

"Ishaan wait. Wait for me" she cried out as she ran after her giggling little boy. Her long hair and her short kaftan blew in the sea breeze as she ran, a smile lighting up her face. "I'll catch you chotu" she cried out, laughing at her toddling son.

Ishaan turned around to look at her, a huge grin on his face, and ran smack into a pair of legs.

"Ammaaa" he cried out as he fell onto the sand, just as Ishita reached him. She barely gave a glance at the stranger her son had collided with, kneeling on the sand as she picked Ishaan up, holding him close to her heart.

"Are you okay darling?" she asked anxiously, brushing sand off him. Just then one of the babysitters, Lusi, who had been running up to help her also reached them. Ishaan was fine, and he grabbed at Lusi's hand. "Water" he cried out, giddy with anticipation. "I want go swim"

"I'll take him madam" Lusi picked up the little boy and walked off towards the sea, as Ishita slowly got up, finally looking at the stranger her son had collided with. He had been standing by the side, strangely quiet, but not moving away.

"I'm sorry, I hope my son didn't dirty your clothes" she said as she straightened up. And then her voice died in her throat. For the man her son had collided with, the man now staring at her as if he had seen a ghost was no one else but Subbu. Her former fiancée. The man she had dreamt of marrying. Subbu, the man who had dumped her so publicly and so suddenly, six long years ago. Of all the places in the world, on this beach in Fiji, halfway across the world from where she had last seen him six years ago. Subramaniam Iyer. Subbu.

********************************
She stared at him for a moment longer, a myriad of emotions running through her head. Surprise, shock, curiosity. She had not seen him since their engagement had ended, she had not even thought of him for a very long time. But often, in the early days of their separation, she had wondered what she would feel when she  met him again. Would there still be the immensity of pain that threatened to tear her into pieces, and had sent her spiraling into despair? Would there still be the regret of an eon of unfulfilled dreams?

Nothing. She felt nothing. Except for surprise. And curiosity. What was Subbu doing in Fiji?

"Subbu?" Her voice was puzzled, confused. "Tum yahan? In Fiji of all places?" (You here? In Fiji of all places?)

"Ishita" his eyes raked her from head to toe as he took in the short kaftan, her open hair, the sunglasses covering her eyes. She looked amazing, far more attractive than when he had last seen her six years ago. She had aged well. "It is you. Mein ne socha mere ankhen dhoka de rahe hai. Tum yahan kaise? Aur woh bachha? I thought.. amma said you married some older divorcee but he had grown up children, no? Then how...?" (It is you. I thought my eyes were playing a trick on me. What are you doing here? And that child? I thought.. amma said you married some older divorcee but he had grown up children, no? Then how?)

Ishita clamped her lips, biting down a surge of anger that coursed through her on hearing her husband spoken of so derogatorily. Older divorcee indeed. If her Raavan could only hear this......

"Your amma wasn't quiet right" she said quietly. "My husband had been married earlier, yes, and we have two older children, but they are not quite grown up yet. Adi is 15 and Ruhi is almost 10 now. And Ishaan is also our son. I should go and join them..."

She looked out towards the sea, at her laughing babies and her sister, frolicking in the shallows, the babysitters keeping a watchful eye.

"Wait Ishita." Subbu reached out a hand to stop her, and she looked at him curiously again.

His touch evoked nothing. He had been her first love. She had shared her first kiss with him. She had dreamt of a life with him. Her teen world had started and ended with him. And yet there was nothing left.

"It's been so many years. Talk to me for a while. Here, let's sit here" He gestured at a coconut trunk lying close by , and she shrugged, sitting down next to him. She was curious about what he was doing here. It would do no harm to find out.

"So what are you doing here Subbu?" She asked again.

She had gotten over the shock of seeing him now, and she looked at him searchingly as she waited for him to answer. He had not changed much in the six years since she had seen him. Conventionally good looking. Still lean, his face clean shaven. But his hair was thinning now, just like Bala jiju's, and there were some lines on his face, his jowls a bit heavier. He was dressed in the colorful bula shirt that most men wore in Fiji, and sneakers with shorts. But he did not appear to be a tourist.

"I work here" Subbu finally replied. He too had been staring at her, and Ishita drew her caftan closer together, suddenly self conscious of his searching gaze. "I joined the Sofitel Group soon after I got married. That's almost 6 years ago, if you remember. And I'm stationed here now, as the Assistant Manager of the Resort. I got here around 8 months ago. I was in the Bahamas before that."

If you remember he had said. Of course she remembered his wedding. It was only a month after he had dumped her, a rushed run to the altar as if to prove his virility, his manhood. She remembered now too, the bitter tears she had shed when she had heard, the feeling of utter despair that another woman was getting the place that she, Ishita Iyer, had long considered her own. Yes, she remembered. But as she sat and listened to him, she realized that she remembered without bitterness, without rancor and without pain. It was as if all that had happened to someone else, in another lifetime. Not to her.

"And your family?" She asked politely. "Akka said you had a son"

"Two now" Subbu replied. "They live in Chennai, with my wife."

"They aren't with you?" She asked in surprise. "But you're a Manager, I'm sure you can have your family here with you?"

"Oh yes I can, but Manorma and the boys have always stayed in India. I go and see them two or three times every year. And they came to the Bahamas for a visit. I'm sure they will come here too before my next posting. It's just easier with them in Chennai. I'm very busy here, and it's a huge responsibility, my job. I mean... I don't know what your husband does, but when you're in management like I am, with a multi national corp, there's not much free time for the family. Besides with technology now, I talk to the boys all the time, it's not like I'm missing anything. Maybe when they are older or I get a posting in Asia, they will join me."

"But it must be so difficult for your wife, managing alone" Ishita looked at him in consternation. So since his marriage he had been living alone, leaving all the responsibilities of his children to his wife? She thought of her own husband, his genuine regret each time he had to leave his family for a week or two for his work, his efforts to give her time to herself st the weekends, the way he woke up with her at nights when the babies wouldn't sleep, when Raashi had colic. She remembered too the month when he had not been with her when he had lost his memory, how difficult everything had seemed, how all the problems and hassles of life had seemed magnified, insurmountable.

"Oh Manorma is a full time mother. She doesn't work." His words were dismissive and Ishita felt a sudden pang of compassion for his unknown wife. Her Raavan, he was so proud of her, of her career, the way she handled the children....

"Talking of babies.... your son...Ishaan did you say... he really blends in well with you I have to say. If I didn't know, I would never have known he was adopted. Or did you use a surrogate?" Subbu's words broke through her reverie and she glanced up at him in surprise and consternation.

"Adopted? Surrogate? Nothing of the sort. Ishaan is my child, Raman and my child. I gave birth to him Subbu. Two years ago."

"Your child? You..but Ishita, you're ...." Subbu stopped suddenly, an embarrassed look on his face, but she knew exactly what he had been thinking, what he had been about to say. And she realized at that moment just what a lucky escape she had had.

*************************************
Meanwhile out in the ocean
Raman held on tightly to Ruhi, careful to shield her from the stinging spray as the jet boat pulling their skis slowed down. The boat drew up on the beach and he looked on with a fond smile as his daughter was unstrapped from the skis and pulled onto the boat, and then clambered on himself.

"Thank you papa" Ruhi launched herself into her papa's arms. "Kitna mazaa ayaa. Can we go again?" (That was so much fun. Can we go again?)

"In a little while beta. Let bhaiyya have a turn now. Adi" Raman urged his daughter to sit down and quickly buckled her into the seat before turning to look anxiously at his son. Adi had strapped on the skis and was ready to take his turn. "Are you sure you will be okay by yourself."

"Yes papa. Stop worrying."

"He will be fine Raman" Mihir put an arm around his brother's shoulders as the boat started to speed up again, and Adi's delighted whoops could be heard behind them.

"Not too fast" Raman said to the boat operator, before turning back to Mihir. "Yaar, kaise worry nahi karoon? Jaan hai yeh meri. Mere bache, meri ...." (Yaar, how do I not worry? They are my life. My children, my...)

"Aap ki biwi" Mihir completed his sentence for him. "Bhai, mana lo please bhabhi ko. Mihika is upset with me now. Mere liye please." (Your wife. Bhai, please make it up with bhabhi. Mihika is upset with me now. For my sake please)

Raman smiled at the fervor in Mihir's voice, his eyes never leaving his son, who was on the ski's behind them.

"I was wrong Mihir" he said quietly, not wanting Ruhi to overhear. "I should have told her about Gina straight away. I cant imagine what it's like for her, to have to meet someone that I was once close to. And with the way Gina is behaving, any wife would react like this." He paused. "You know, I've often thought how I would feel if I met that coward Subbu. Knowing that Ishita loved him for so long, wanted to marry him, how would I cope with meeting him, seeing his face? And to think that I put Ishita through that pain, but without even warning her of Gina and my history. I was trying to protect her, but I was wrong."

"But you were trying to protect Bhabhi Raman. All this time I've known Ishita bhabhi, I've known that she is very insecure about you. And you're the same about her. You used to behave horribly with poor Abhi Raghav. It's like you love each other so much that you don't want to think of each other with someone else. But Gina or Subbu or whoever ... they are in the past bhai. No one can come between you ever. That's all in the past."

"I know that Mihir. But it's not always possible to be rational when it comes to the one you love the most." Raman shook his head wryly and then turned to the boat operator. "I think my son is getting tired. Let's head back."

*************************************
Back on the beach
"Yes, my child" Ishita said with a smile, an emphasis on the "my", as she stood up. "It turns out I wasn't a baanj after all, Subbu."

"Ishu, I'm sorry" Subbu slipped back into an old familiarity as he hastily stood up too. "For...for everything. I hope you can forgive me for everything that ....happened. I know how much I hurt you and ...."

"It's all right Subbu" It wasn't just words, she truly meant it. It honestly was all right. "I moved on a long time ago. What happened with you, what happened in my past isn't relevant anymore to my life. Mein bahut khush hoon Subbu. I am very happy with my life, my family. I am very content with being Mrs Raman Bhalla."

"Raman Bhalla" Subbu's eyes opened wide in shock. "The PR King?" The guy behind the Mehta Resort opening? So that's why you're here? He is your husband? But... I mean, I didn't realize... he is a huge deal.... but isn't he with Gina Shah?" His voice was full of undisguised curiosity as he stared at Ishita.

Ishita's smile did not miss a beat. She may be angry with her husband, but there was no way she was going to parade her private life, her private hurt in front of this man.

"Gina Shah?" Her voice was cool, breezy. "She is the Resorts brand ambassador and she is a diva, so obviously there is a lot of publicity around her. Raman has been her escort for the opening functions but now I'm here and he is off duty. And now I really have to...."

"Subbu darling...." A petulant voice interrupted her, as a young attractive Indian woman, dressed in a skimpy bikini, a sarong tied low around her waist, came up to them, slipping an arm around Subbu's waist as she stared with undisguised hostility at Ishita. "You're off duty today. Surely your guests can leave you alone for a few hours"

"Annie...woh... this is my .... my friend ... from India..." Subbu stammered as Ishita stared at him and the girl with dawning comprehension. So this was why Subbu didn't have his family with him.

"Ishita Bhalla" she said brightly. "And you are?"

"Anahita Mishra" the girl replied dismissively. "Subbu's girlfriend. I'm the beautician at the spa here. Do come by, I'm sure we can do something to help you out."

Ishita smiled and shook her head. "Thanks Anahita" she said with a laugh. "I'll keep it in mind. Now if you'll excuse me , I need to join my family"

"Ishu..." Subbu called urgently as she walked off, but she did not stop. Her mind was working furiously as she slowly negotiated the small stretch of beach to where her family was.

To meet Subbu here, of all places, and then to discover that he had virtually deserted his family, was cheating on his wife ... he had always seemed so conservative, had dumped her because he claimed he wanted a family. Well, now he had a family, but he couldn't stay faithful to them. And if he couldn't stay faithful to his wife, then had his words of fidelity meant anything during their relationship? She wondered what he had been up to during his time in London, before their engagement. He had never pressured her for intimacy, maybe it was because he was getting what he needed from others. She wondered briefly about how she could have misjudged his character so much, could have shed so many tears over someone so unworthy. And to think that she had thought herself inadequate because this man had rejected her. And those thoughts of inadequacy, they had fed into the insecurity that she still sometimes felt in her marriage. Her husband's love for her was beyond reproach, yet a little shard of insecurity always seemed to burst the bubble of confidence with which she cloaked herself. They had become true partners sexually, yet they had always held a little something back emotionally.

And she was as guilty of it as he was. And maybe, just maybe, it was that holding back had that led to him not being open with her when someone openly threatened their relationship. She was still angry with him over that, but maybe she understood his reasons.

She shook her head wryly as she reached her family, opening her arms to her wet and disheveled, but very happy babies as the twins came running to her, both barreling into her, four little arms reaching up to grab her, two little faces looking at her with adoration.

She pretended to get knocked over by her babies, falling to the ground while holding them on top of her. She laughed as they  jumped and scrambled  over her, not caring about the sand in her hair, the warm Pacific Ocean soaking through her clothes. She felt free, free from a past she did not realize she had still felt beholden to, free from the burden of failing the expectations of someone who had never mattered.

What was real was here and now. With these little humans for whom she was everything, their world, their entire existence. With their brother and sister, the children of her heart, who had made her a mother, had given her a love she had thought she would never experience in this lifetime. And with their father, her soulmate, the man who had healed her broken self and who had entrusted her with his soul - the man with whom she had experienced real love, the kind that seared the soul and left you breathless, the kind that would never end.

The past did not matter. The past was not important, it could not cloud her present, her future. Everything important was in her grasp, in her today.

"Akka, itna kyun hus rahi ho? Sab kuch theek hai na?" (Akka, why are you laughing so much? Is everything all right?) Mihika had clambered out of the shallows where she had been soaking, and dropped onto the sand next to her laughing sister and her giggling niece and nephew. She looked at Ishita curiously. Akka had been so sad all morning, avoiding looking at jeeju, giving stilted responses when spoken to, having to make a visible effort to smile at the children. There had been pain and sadness behind those smiles. But now, in under an hour since they had gotten to the beach, she looked so happy. So free.

"Bilkul theek hai Miku" (Absolutely Miku) Ishita had taken off her sunglasses and her still slightly swollen eyes bellied her assertion. But the smile on her lips was genuine.

"So you're okay with jeeju now akka? Lekin kaise?Kyun?" (But how, when?)

"I am still upset with your jeeju Miku" Ishita reached over to pull her little daughter away from her son, just in time to stop Raashi from kicking over the sandcastle Ishaan was building. "For not telling me everything. For not trusting me with the truth when someone is trying to come between us, to break up our relationship. But I'm not upset about his past anymore. You see, I just realized something."

"Kya akka?" (What akka?)

"Yahi Miku, ki jo beet gaya woh beet gaya, khatm ho gaya, aur woh kabhi sach tha hi nahi. Jo sach hota woh kabhi khatm nahi hota." (Just this Miku, that what is over is over, it's finished because it was never real at all. And what is real never ends)

Mihika pouted at her smiling sister. "What akka, kya keh rahe ho aap? You're talking in riddles" (What akka? What are you saying? You're talking in riddles)

Ishita was about to reply but just then a voice spoke up behind them.

"Ishita, please, what you saw there, don't say anything to Bala anna ....."

Both Mihika and Ishita turned around at the sound of the man's voice and his voice died out.

"Subbu?" Mihika cried out. "You? here?"

Subbu's face turned ashen as he saw yet another sister in law of his brother staring at him in shock. Maybe they were all here. Maybe Bala anna was here too. And then in utter confusion at his deceit being caught out,  Subbu turned on his heels and walked away as rapidly as he had approached them.

********************************
Some Hours Later @7pm
Raman and Ishita's villa - Mehta Resort

All four children had fallen asleep almost as soon as they reached the villa, tired out by their fun packed day at the Sofitel. Ishita had tried to keep them awake, wanting them to sleep after dinner, but the sun, the sea and the change in time zones had meant that all four had been too tired to keep their eyes open.

So she had put them all to bed, making them shower first, applying aloe Vera on sunburn and soothing cranky little babies with hugs and cranky bigger ones with attempted kisses. That done, she had realized what a mess she looked, and had taken a long shower, humming to herself at the thought of making up with her husband again. She had missed him so much. It was time for them to talk.

She came into the living room now, after looking in on her sleeping children, and adjusting pillows and thrown off duvets. She stood at the open sliding doors to the deck, looking out to the sea. And at her husband.

Raman was outside on the deck, leaning against the rails, looking pensively into the distance. She wrinkled her nose in annoyance at the glass of liquor in his hand. It was almost 7pm and the sun had long set, but he hadn't eaten much at lunch and it was still too early for a drink. And yet, she couldn't blame him. She knew how awful she felt at being estranged from him. It must be the same for him.

It had been a wonderful day for the children, but a strange one for their parents.

They had started the day with Ishita ignoring her husband, her heart still hurting from his not telling her the truth about his previous relationship with Gina Shah, and that woman's intention to break their marriage. He on the other hand had been desperate for her forgiveness, looking at her at every opportunity, trying to speak to her. They had mostly spent the day apart, he with the older children and Mihir. She with the babies and Mihika.

When they had gotten together, for lunch and for a glass bottom boat ride over the exotic colourful reefs that surrounded the islands, she had concentrated on the children, and there had been no opportunity for conversations. But every now and then he had felt her eyes on him, had felt as if she was reaching out. And he had noticed a change in her mood. She seemed happier, content, at peace. He was happy about that, but she had still not spoken to him. He couldn't understand what it was then, that had put a half smile back on her face.

And now they were back home, and she had spent most of her time in getting the children settled, while he had lounged about, hoping that she would walk back into their room, that they could finally talk. But she had gone out into the kitchen instead, where Mihika was attempting to put together a simple dinner, and so he had retreated instead onto the deck.

Ishita stared at her husband for a few seconds, wondering whether to go and speak to him. She wanted to tell him about what had happened, about meeting Subbu, and how that meeting had made her realize that the past truly did not matter. And if it did not matter for her, then she could see how his past did not matter to him either. What they had together was so wonderful, so all consuming that there was no room for doubts and uncertainties. There was no need for subterfuge, no need for secrets to protect the other. They could be totally honest, knowing that the other would always understand.

But as she hesitated, Mihir came bounding up from the beach, where he had been walking, to join his bhai, and the moment was lost.

"Later" she told herself. "I'll tell Raman after dinner."

She walked over to where Mihika was busy cooking rice for the fried rice she planned to make, and hugged her sister from behind.

"Kya akka" Mihika said, startled. "You almost made me drop the spoon."

"Let me help?" Ishita asked with a smile.

"Just chop these tomatoes, thanks akka" Mihika pushed some tomatoes towards Ishita and the two sisters worked in companionable silence, until Mihika stopped stirring, looking at her sister quizzically.

"You still seem so happy akka" she said wonderingly.

"Because I am happy Miku. You know why."

"Yes akka I know why, but have you told jeeju yet? Have you told him that you met Subbu today, at the Sofitel?"

"No she hasn't"

Raman had come up behind them, unbeknownst to them, and he now stared at his wife, anguish evident in his eyes. So that was why she had seemed so happy this afternoon? Because she had met her ex fiancée? That bastard who had hurt her so much that he, Raman Bhalla, had not been able to erase the pain of her past even with all the love he had given her.

"Raman" Ishita stared at her husband in horror. She could see pain and confusion in his eyes. He had obviously misunderstood her conversation with Mihika. She should have told him about Subbu, but there hadn't been the chance.

"Raman..." she said again, reaching out a hand towards her husband.

A mask had dropped over his face. He looked at her for long seconds more, then turned on his heel and left the kitchen. He entered their room..correction, his room, since she had moved out, and closed the door firmly behind him. Then he sat on the bed, jealousy and pain twisting deep inside him, and waited for her.... and his tears fell unheeded...

********************************

"Akka, go and explain to jeeju"

"No Mihika" Ishita crossed her arms across her chest, her face set in a stony mask. "If he wants to walk out on me, believe the worst, then that's his business. Mujhe apni safai nahi deni hai kisiko." (I don't have to clear my name to anyone)

Mihika looked at her sister in exasperation. They were both equally pig headed sometimes, her jeeju and her akka. And all because of this incredible passion which they shared for each other, this passion which made them so unreasoningly jealous of others, when they both knew that nothing and no one could ever come between them.

"Safai dene ki baat nahi hai akka. Lekin aap jeeju se naraaz theh ki uss ne aap ko Gina Shah ki sachai nahi batai. Toh jeeju ko bhi haq banta hai na, ki woh naaraz ho ki aap ne uss se nahi kaha ki aap Subbu ko miley theh." (Its not about clearing your name akka. But you were angry with jeeju because he didn't tell you the truth about Gina Shah. Then jeeju also has the right to be angry that you didn't tell him about meeting Subbu)

"It's not the same Mihika. Gina Shah wants to break up my marriage. She wants to break up my marriage, she wants Raman back in her life. And Raman didn't tell me. He didn't intend to tell me. He wanted to hide it from me. Subbu ko mein sirf abhi mili thi. Aur mein Raman ko batana chahti thi, lekin mauka hi nahi mila. Koi ek hafte se baat chuppa nahi rahi hoon mein. Lekin woh jo soch rahe hai, kaise soch sakte hai woh? How can he even think..." (It's not the same Mihika. Gina Shah wants to break up my marriage. She wants to break up my marriage, she wants Raman back in her life. And Raman didn't tell me. He didn't intend to tell me. He wanted to hide it from me. I just met Subbu. And I wanted to tell Raman, but I didn't get the chance. I haven't been hiding this from him for a week. But how can he even think what he is thinking? How can he even think...)

"Tell him how you feel. Talk to him akka" Mihika said firmly.

"No" Ishita shook her head defiantly. She knew her husband too well. She knew what he had assumed. And how could he? How could he think that of her, that her happiness, her change of mood, was because of Subbu? After what he had just put her through about that... that goddam movie star, how could he even....

She brushed back angry tears. "I'm sorry Mihika, I don't feel like eating. I'm going to bed."

And with that she too stalked off into the babies room, shutting the door behind her.Then she sat on her bed, anger and pain twisting deep inside her, and waited for him.... and her tears fell unheeded...

And so the night passed.

Khud Hi Dil Ka Rog Lagaaye
Khud Hi Baitha Roye
Naina Re Naina
Tujhse Burra Na Koi
Naina Re
Tu Hi Burra, Tu Hi Burra
Tujhse Burra Na Koye

Sab Ki Prem Kahaaniyan
Dil Ki Bechainiyan
Tu Hi Shuru Karwaaye
Khud Hi Dil Ka Rog Lagaaye
Khud Hi Baitha Roye
Naina Re Naina
Tujhse Burra Na Koi
Naina Re
Tu Hi Burra
Tujhse Burra Na Koye

Aansu Banke Shalka Jaaye
Dil Ka Peymaana
Ishq Mein Hai Itne Sadme
Dil Mein Na Jaana
Ab Ik Pal Ke Bhi Dooriyan
Mujhse Sahi Jaaye Naa
Dard Bhare Tanhaiyaan
Mujhse Sahi Jaaye Naa
Naina Re
Tu Hi Burra
Tujhse Burra Na Koye

Aansu Banke Chalka Jaaye Dil Ka Paimmana
Ishq Mein Hai Ittne Sadmein Dil Ne Na Jaana
Ab Ek Pal Ki Bhi Dooriyan Mujhse Sahi Jaaye Na
Dard Bhari Tanhaiyaan Mujhse Sahi Jaaye Na
Naina Re
Tu Hi Burra
Tujhse Burra Na Koye
Khud Hi Dil Ka Rog Lagaaye
Khud Hi Baitha Roye
Naina Re

Tutte Sapne Bikhre Armaan Kya Hua Haasil
Bebasi Ka Chaaya Aalam Kya Kare Yeh Dil
Kaate Katte Naa Rattiyan Mushkil Judaai Badi
Yaad Aaye Beeti Battiyan Laage Yun Goo Si Gadi
Naina Re
Tu Hi Burra
Tujhse Burra Na Koye
Khud Hi Dil Ka Rog Lagaaye
Khud Hi Baitha Roye
Naina Re
Naina Re...