【 Jungkook 】

Growing used to the echoing loneliness of Taehyung's absence had proved to feel utterly impossible, especially considering how seemingly every little thing managed to remind you of the entity in one way or another. Whether it'd be the more apparent traces he had left behind such as the mood lights he hung up, the painting he made of the park bench where you both first met, the farewell poem and the book he had left it inside of, and so forth— or the less obvious yet still oh so meaningful details such as the song you both had declared as your own, the series you had been watching together but never got to complete, and countless of other habits and self-declared traditions which never would feel quite the same without him; thus time and time again reopening the painfully fresh wounds of his passing and practically driving you insane at this point.

Prominent dark circles had begun to make themselves at home under your eyes as a result of the lack of sleep and constant reoccurring nightmares you've been having about him as of late— ones which typically varied in scenery and general play through, yet consistently had the very same painful outcome that'd ultimately cause you to startle awake, panting in a cold sweat.

Though as of lately, it was almost as if your very own mind suddenly deemed said nightmares weren't brutal enough anymore, and therefore no longer only surrounded themselves around just losing Taehyung— but also everyone else around you in one way or another. And despite knowing how these nightmares by no means harbored any truth nor prediction abilities whatsoever, there was no denying how utterly gut-wrenching they still felt to experience, let alone attempt to shake off afterward.

A weary sigh escaped past your lips as you absentmindedly paced around the apartment; exhausted beyond words, yet still keeping busy by wiping down every surface you possibly could find– and reach, in order to somewhat keep your mind at bay— only to curse softly under your breath as you accidentally ended up knocking over a stack of books in the process.

Not being able to openly mourn the entity's sudden passing had certainly not been easy, and undeniably led to some rather miserable coping mechanism attempts— sort of hoping that drowning yourself in ungodly amounts of work and chores at home would help distract you from the grievance at least during the day.

Was it arguably unhealthy and an even worse long-term fix? Maybe. But for the most part, it sort of worked for now until you've found a better way to cope.

Another weary breath escaped past your lips as you eventually finished re-stacking the books that so clumsily had been knocked over in a zoned-out state just now, lightly running your fingers through your dark locks whilst snickering softly at the absurdity of your current state— only to tiredly glance over towards your right when the sound of a gentle notification ping echoed from your phone which laid on the coffee table nearby.

You cocked your head to the side curiously whilst eyeing the message sent by the older, typing out a quick ''Yeah I am actually, what's up Jiminie?'' and patiently waiting while the bubble signaling he was typing popped up— only for the bubble to disappear moments later as you ended up being left on read, subconsciously causing a subtle pout to form on your lips while you glumly put your phone back down; admittedly having hoped for the conversation to drag on at least a little longer no matter what the topic, yet fully understanding how the male must've been busy at work right now and therefore quickly decided against sending a second text to the male.

However, just as you put your phone back down in order to resume cleaning, a startled gasp escaped past your lips upon both hearing and witnessing how the door to your apartment suddenly unlocked and flung open without a warning— causing you to audibly gasp and aggressively flinch whilst watching with widened doe eyes as both of your brothers joined by Hoseok and Jimin came stomping inside with bright grins plastered on to their proud faces.

Jungkook: W-wait— what are you guys doing here?

Without wasting any more time, your brothers took one knowing look at you and the ridiculously sparkling clean apartment before quickly engulfing you into a warm hug— causing your bewildered self to momentarily tense up, only to seconds later relax and melt into the comfort of their embrace.

Jin: Oh Ggukie... You look worse than ever dummy.

Yoongi: Didn't we agree you'd stop bottling things up like this Jungkook-ah?

You couldn't help but let a soft snicker emit past your lips as you shrugged while they finally pulled away from the tight embrace, quietly uttering out a playful ''Sheesh, thanks Jin-hyung'' before sheepishly rubbing at your nape as you hesitantly spoke.

Jungkook: I'm not... bottling things up? I'm just, uhm—

A patient silence lingered in the air as you suddenly couldn't bring yourself to look up at them, unsure of what else to say besides the extremely vague details you already had provided them with once. However, it wasn't long before you felt a gentle hand being placed on your shoulder by Jimin as he flashed you a faint but reassuring smile.

Jimin: Don't worry, we're not here to pester you into telling us more about what happened since you clearly feel uncomfortable talking about it— however...

He then proceeded to gesture toward the absurdly clean apartment and then back towards you— particularly pointing towards the painfully obvious eye bags currently painting your under eyes as he continued.

Jimin: –what we will do, is try to stop this self-destructive madness you have going on right now.

Although you tried to assure them you were fine, there evidently was no fooling these three whom moments later proudly proceeded to announce how they all had cleared their schedules in order to stay here over tonight— instantly causing a surprised but genuine smile to form onto your lips as they went on to excitedly tell you about what they had planned out for tonight.

⎯⎯ ❀ ⎯⎯

Throughout the night, you slowly but surely managed to somewhat break out of your silent shell of grief— instead feeling comforted by the presence of your brothers and friends whom so effortlessly filled the apartment with that much-needed warm laughter and playful banter as you all enjoyed the early hours of the evening together through a range of hilariously competitive board games; gradually causing the apartment to slowly but surely regain a tinge of the warmth which it previously had lost.

It would of course be a lie to say you were able to forget the source of your sadness entirely, as your eyes still occasionally found themselves habitually searching for the entity whenever something fun he would've enjoyed happened in order to see his reaction— only to naturally be reminded that he no longer was here. Yet somehow, even the sting of those sorrows at least temporarily seemed to ease now that you weren't so alone, though you doubted there ever would be a day they'd fully disappear either.

Towards the end of the night after having finished a delicious home-cooked dinner that you all prepared together, the four of you comfortably settled down onto the couch with the intent of having a movie race— only to find yourself struggling not to doze off after the very first movie; as it turns out, their presence truly felt so comforting, that your body finally began to allow itself to relax from a tension you didn't even realize was there up until now.

This naturally didn't go unnoticed by the rest, whom happily allowed you to rest on them during the entire movie whilst tenderly looking out for you before ultimately encouraging you to call it a night once the credits began to roll. And while it took a tinge of stubbornness to convince you since you wanted to make the most out of your time together, a defeated sigh finally left your lips as you gave in and nodded in agreement— quickly double-checking to make sure all their beddings were set down properly and reminding them to let you know if they needed anything before bidding them goodnight as you were ushered upstairs to your own bed on the loft.

Thankfully you all had decided to change into sleepwear quite early on in the name of comfort, and so you could just allow your body to instantly hit the mattress before snuggling into the comforter; weary eyes slowly trailing over towards the big floor-to-ceiling window which could be viewed from the loft, seeing how the sun nearly had finished setting by now as some faint stars gradually also begun to show up in the sky.

A faint smile crept onto your lips as you hugged the comforter closer to yourself, thinking back to the beautiful sunset colors that had filled the apartment earlier this evening whilst watching how the sky gradually darkened into a deep midnight color.

Jungkook: I'd like to believe it was you who created such a beautiful sunset for us tonight Taehyungie... so thank you.

Somehow in that very moment, it was almost as if a gentle surge of much-needed strength had come over you, as you silently promised yourself to no longer live in the very misery Taehyung so proudly had watched you fight out of— but to instead live and do things for the two of you in his honor as if he still was there to experience it all with you; hoping that he really was watching over you somehow like he promised he would in that poem.

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