These 7 years went by slowly and I noticed that I was 13 the last time I wrote on this diary, I'm 20 now...
You must be wondering how these 7 years went and how I have been... Well, everything just got worse...
I was very slim due to the times I starved and I was getting weaker everyday that passed so I started walking around a nearby park to keep my stamina...
I went to the hospital last month because I just felt like it and the nurse told that, even if I started working out, I needed to eat more... And I couldn't deny that she was right.... I didn't eat a lot these 7 years... I barely had breakfast or dinner and some times people at school stole my money and I didn't even have lunch... The worst part is that I couldn't do anything and it angers me...
About Omega, he's still here with me and we are doing fine, we became good friends and I taught him a lot of things, specially to hide when he feels someone other than me near the door and to not meow at the door to not bring any undesired attention...

Anyway, in school, I was bullied even more and very frequently, and when I say frequently, I mean every single day... Today, I was walking through the hall, looking down with my usual frown on my face as I heard everyone commenting stuff about me, some were whispering among each others, some were just speaking normally, not even caring if I heard or not but I couldn't care less... Every day the same... Saying that I just wanted attention and stuff like that, some rumours here and there which were totally fake but again, I couldn't care less about the stuff they said... I have a clear mind... I know what I do and I know they're just lies...
To change the subject a little bit, Mary and her best friend were still my classmates, I really couldn't help it but stare at Mary a couple times, she was the kind of girl I always wanted to be... She's attractive, she always keeps a smile on her face no matter what happens, even when she gets something wrong or messes up... She's fit and funny and she always helps everyone in need but she doesn't even know my existence even though we're from the same class and my seat is a couple ones behind hers, I was isolated in a dark corner in the back of the room... I could never be like her... Why did I bring her up now, you ask? That's because, when I was heading to the canteen today, a group of bullies stole the only money I had with me to buy lunch so I guessed I wasn't going to eat anything so soon and I decided to walk somewhere quiet, that is until I felt a hand on my shoulder...
I trembled... I thought it was another bully that had decided to waste their time hitting me... But it wasn't...
When I turned around, ready to meet my fate, my dark brown eyes met Mary's gentle ones... She was just standing there, her sweet but small smile was still on her face as she stared at me and her eyes showed something I had never seen before... Pity...
"I saw those bullies stealing your money earlier... I guessed you didn't have more since you started walking away and then I noticed how slim you are... I can tell you are having a hard time... Here, I bought you something, I know it's not a lot but... I hope you like it" she said and handed me a small chocolate cake, my heart ached... That was the first and maybe only act of kindness I had received in my entire life... I wanted to break down right there in front of her, let everything out... But I remained strong... I was hesitating but I was going to pick it and thank her for it, that is, until I saw the other girl, from the corner of my eye, glaring at me so I began trembling in fear and ran away, I didn't want any more trouble... I didn't want Mary to have trouble because of me either... So I just ran to where my legs took me... A place where I could be alone... The back of the school... No one would go there but me... Everything there was rusty, old and abandoned...

In classes, I didn't stare at Mary and avoided eye contact with her the rest of that day but I somehow knew that she would stare at me frequently, I kept myself busy with sketches on my notebook and was able to forget everything for a while but, in the middle of the last class of the day, one of my classmates picked one of my sketches "hey, guys, look! She's drawing Mary!" the guy exclaimed and showed the sketch to the whole room... Everyone laughed, except for Mary and the teacher, I just kept looking down at my desk "miss Fernandes, can you stay here after classes?" the teacher asked while she picked the draw, I bit my lip as the whole class, but Mary, laughed again but then they all got quiet for some reason "yes, miss..." I said faintly "the freak talks" one of the guys said and everyone laughed again "shut up and let's continue the class" the teacher said and the class continued, I tried to focus on what the teacher was saying and trying to take notes but I just couldn't...

When the class ended and after everyone but me and the teacher had left the room, silence filled the air so I decided to speak "I'm sorry... I won't draw again, I promise" I said faintly "I didn't ask you to stay here because of the draw, it was because of something else" she said, I kept quiet as I got ready to leave "I noticed that you are very slim, have you been eating well?" she asked "no..." I replied "but you should... How long have you been like that?" she asked "7 years" I replied "should I call your parents and tell them?" she asked "please, no, anything but that" I begged "okay... Then I won't... Anyway, Mary spoke with me today" she said, I looked in shock for a couple seconds but then regained my empty stare "she told me some bullies stole your money and that she tried offering you something for lunch but you ran off for no reason... Why didn't you say anything?" she asked "it's not the first or the last time that will happen, besides, things would just be worse if I told someone..." I explained "I see... It's that bad... Well, she also told me that this might not be much but that she hopes it helps" she said and handed me 2 dollars, I looked down "please tell her that I thank her for everything she did for me today but that I'm sorry but I can't take it... For as much as I need it... Tell her that she should go on with her life and that she doesn't have to worry about me..." I said "won't you really take it?" she asked, I shook my head "I'm sorry but I shouldn't... Now, please excuse me... I can't stay for longer than this..." I said and walked back home before my parents arrived.

When I got home, I went straight to my room and locked the door, the next thing I did was sit on the corner, hugged my knees and cried for minutes or maybe hours... Who knows... I don't have notion of time when I'm like this... That is... Until I felt lightheaded, a strong pain in my chest and I couldn't breath, I knew what this was... I was about to pass out due to the fact that I am starving myself to death... I cried harder, I just wanted this pain to end but it seemed like it was going to stay here forever...
When I was ready to accept the fact that I was going to pass out, I heard an unfamiliar voice "eat or you'll die" then I looked up and the first thing I saw was a weird-looking woman, she kinda looked like this:

She was handing me a chocolate but I was too scared to do anything, maybe it was a trap, I kept studying her and we kept silent for a while but, as she was about to speak again, I heard someone knocking on the door so I looked at it "what?" I asked rudely "your uncle is downstairs and he wants to see you, come imediatelly" my mom ordered, I sighed in annoyance as I heard her footsteps leaving, then I turned to the figure that was standing before me but she was already gone, the only thing that hadn't vanished was the chocolate, which was now resting on my lap.

I stared at it for a couple seconds because I was hesitating, but, after a while, I finally decided to give it a try and took a bite, if it was poisonous I'd at least be happy to die so I didn't really care about it, but it wasn't poisoned, in fact, I gave a small smile at how good it tasted... I had forgotten how good chocolate was...
After eating the sweet food, I decided to go downstairs to see what my uncle wanted from me, locking my bedroom's door behind me and hiding the key.
He had a fake smile from ear to ear, just like my parents and my brother had "hey, why don't you give your uncle a hug?" my uncle asked with his arms opened, I stared at him, insecure but with my defense up and my poker face "you changed a lot" he said "I don't know what happened to her, she was always happy and smilling when she was younger" my mom said "we grow up to see the true nature of other people" I said faintly
"why don't you bring James here so your uncle can see him?" my mom asked looked confused at her "his name is Omega and leave me alone" I said and went back to my room.
Once I got in and locked the door, I sat on my bed and drew again, I guess I spend most of my time doing that... Then Omega came from under the bed and sat next to me "the people outside called you James, do you like that name?" I asked he made a weird noise like he was angry "yeah, me neither" I said as I looked down at him and sighed.
I kept busy for the rest of the day and when I felt tired, I changed to my pj, turned off the light, layed on the bed and cried until I finally fell asleep.