DEMONS.
( chapter eleven. )

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Edited 12/25/2015 @3:08 PM
Edited 07/09/2016 @4:16 AM
Edited 11/19/2017 @12:01 AM

AS ANDY WATCHED THROUGH the window into the operating room, she felt a certain numbness creep over her. Empty eyes watched as doctors rushed around Fury's unconscious body. It was chaotic, but they were doing everything they could.

Still, she wondered; would it be enough?

Emotion snuck up on her and she swallowed roughly. She hoped it would be. Andrea rubbed at her arms. She felt hollow and cold─ like something less than human. It was a wonder how she was able to watch as her life fell apart without breaking down.

But, Andy had felt the shift inside of her and knew it was to blame.

From the moment they'd arrived, her focus had gone into a state of half there, half far, far away. Her mind was a safe space where her thoughts could run rampant. It was a much needed distraction─ or, rather a sense of protection─ from anything that might sabotage her composure.

Though, Andrea was sure that even without her jumbled thoughts, she still wouldn't be able to figure out what she should be feeling.

She had felt loss, and experienced grief in ways unimaginable. But, now, she could feel none of that─ and despite the fact that she wasn't religious, Andy found herself praying that she wouldn't have to. The thought of losing Fury made her protection feel like nothing more than a facade.

And she had to believe it was more than that.

Natasha's voice was a sudden reprieve from the silence, "Tell me about the shooter."

Andrea blinked once, then twice before replying. "He's strong and fast─ skilled beyond what I thought he was capable of." Talking alone felt sour on her tongue, never-mind just describing the one man who had sent her life to hell.

"The most identifiable thing about him was his left arm. It was complete metal," she continued. "We were nearly level in skill, but he─" Andrea paused against the grit of her teeth.

"He was better than me," she admitted, fingers curling into fists.

"He'll easily adapt to your skill set. You may not be his assigned target, but he won't hesitate to put a bullet through you if it means completing the mission." Andy found herself suddenly pulling back from the window.

With no distraction to maintain her emotions, she couldn't help but feel overcome with guilt. Tears stung her eyes as she realized that this was all her fault. Andy let her head fall into her hands. God, how did she live with herself?

The assassin hadn't let her go because she was an innocent bystander in the way of his mission. Andy choked back sobs. He wanted her to lead him to Fury─ and she'd done it willingly.

Andrea turned, unable to watch any longer as her throat tightened. She could feel Natasha's hand rest upon her back, but found little comfort in it. Caring gestures weren't deserved, not like this.

"Is he gonna make it?" Nat finally asked.

Andy inhaled sharply, still clinging onto hope that this would all be some sort of terrible nightmare. She lifted her head to look at Fury─ a mere second being all she could handle─ before turning away. She didn't want to think about how his death would mark yet another one on her hands.

"They don't know," she whispered, burrowing into her friends embrace. Her head rested upon Natasha's chest as the woman rubbed comforting circles into her back. She had always admired Nat's composure.

The sound of footsteps approaching was heard and the pair pulled away as Agent Hill joined them. Maria's smile was half-hearted, but sympathetic.

  Andrea glanced over to the corner where Steve stood alone. He wasn't watching her, but rather the group as a whole. She quickly looked away, recalling their fight only a few hours prior. She felt sick just thinking about it.

  The world may have had it out for her, but why let it destroy the last few good things she had in her life?

And for what reason, to spare herself the pain when he was ultimately taken from her too? No─ Andrea wouldn't let that happen. She'd mend whatever had been broken between her and Steve. He was all she had.

As Hill began to speak, Andy tried to focus. One issue at a time, she thought to herself. It felt selfish to hope that whatever thread holding her and Steve together would last until then. But, she didn't want to think anymore.

"Three slugs, and a rifle. Completely untraceable," Hill informed them. Andy resisted the urge to curl her fingers into fists.

"Soviet made," Natasha cut in, her back turned to the group as she faced Fury.

The Jones woman glanced in her direction. "How do you know?" She asked, studying the expression on Nat's face. As skilled as she was in composure, Andy had learned to read the signs. She was tense, but why?

"Lucky guess," the redhead muttered.

Andrea released a soft huff. She wasn't buying it, but she could understand the hesitancy. Natasha had been taught well in the practice of caution. It meant safety.

Andy was tempted to draw out more information, but soon found herself stopping short as an unfamiliar sound struck her ears. There was a high-pitched ringing in the air that Andrea couldn't identify until she turned to find the source. She immediately felt her knees go weak.

It was the sound she'd been dreading all night; the line going flat.

"Come on Nick," Andy could hear Natasha whispering from beside her. But, the words were faint in comparison to the ringing filling the Jones woman's ears.

When the doctors finally called it, a shiver crept its way up Andrea's body as she was struck with sudden grief. "No." The word seemed to be on repeat, but she hardly realized they were her own until they were cut off by her own sobs.

Bringing a hand to her mouth as if to stifle the sound, Andrea Jones felt devastation come to life. Turning away, the brunette found herself being welcomed into the comforting arms of Steve. She wanted to will the entirety of that day into a horrible nightmare; a dream she could wake up from.

It was plausible enough given her view of Fury as invincible.

But, he was just a man─ and now he was gone. What did that mean for the team sworn to the protection of the Earth? What did that mean for her?

The world seemed so against her and Andrea was at a tipping point. She was torn between the temptation of giving up and the determination to be the person Fury had crafted her into; the hero he wanted her to become.

As Andy felt rage root itself deep within her, she felt her choice shift into place. She would finish the mission they'd been given and bring those responsible to whatever justice she deemed fit; no matter how immoral. No matter un-heroic.

She swore it.

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An hour had passed since the doctor's called time of death and Andy still couldn't shake the ever-growing feeling of something swallowing her whole. The tears had long since subsided, but what was left in their place seemed somehow worse than the pain; a corpse─ a body unfeeling.

Andy closed her eyes, pinching the skin above her elbow. The pain was a shocking jolt that reminded her that she was still there; in the present, as unfortunate as it seemed.

Shuffling behind Natasha and Steve, the Jones woman swallowed hard as her stomach churned. She opened her eyes, staring blankly at the backs of her friends. It all felt wrong.

They were on their way to see the body. But, seeing him lying there would finally make it real, and Andy didn't want it to be real. She was still waiting to wake up, chest heaving from nightmares and body shaking with cold sweat.

Andrea paused outside the door as her two friends went in. Neither of them waited for her, though Steve glanced back to make sure that she was alright. Andy nodded, her smile half-hearted before the door closed between them.

She rested her hand on the cool metal of the handle, heart seeming to pound inside of her chest. Her nose felt warm as tears stung her eyes once more. This isn't a nightmare, she told herself. You have a job to do, it's time to get yourself together and finish this. Be strong... Be strong.

Those thoughts were a mantra─ a repetition of words not her own, but belonging to a distant memory.

At the time, Andy had been so hung up on a loss, disappointed when her powers proved to be the most useless thing about her. She'd been trying so hard to improve. It got to the point where, if Fury hadn't intervened, the consequences would've been nearly fatal.

But, Nick had helped her hone her skill until she was able to fight without needing her abilities. Fury believed in her strength, had told her that she was strong enough to be a part of this new team─ with or without her specialties.

After all, the Jones girl could always create new ones.

So, Andrea did, and now his words would be her will to continue. What Fury had wanted for her wasn't a perfect soldier. It was a resilient strength and the decision to be her own person.

Andy inhaled a shaky breath, steeling herself for what she was about to face. She had to say goodbye to him. After everything Nick had done for her, she had to tell him she was sorry.

The brunette pushed the door open and forced her feet to move. Though, she froze immediately at the sight of him laying motionless on the table. Natasha was leaning above him, placing a gentle kiss to his forehead.

Not a moment later, the Romanoff woman left the room in a storm, quickly followed by Steve.

Andy watched the two go, heart plummeting in her chest as she turned back to Fury. She hadn't wanted to be alone. She felt her lips purse as she tentatively touched his face, fighting back her tears as she looked him over.

The guilt was overwhelming now─ inescapable. "I won't let you down again, I promise," she whispered to Nick. Andy leaned down to place her own kiss on his forehead.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, "Please, forgive me." Andy immediately stepped back as the door opened and agent Hill appeared.

The woman gave her a comforting smile before nodding her head in the direction of his body. "We need to take him," she said and Andy gave a nod before quickly exiting the room.

As she passed the threshold and the door closed behind her, breathing suddenly felt easier. Andy doubled over, chest nearly heaving as she shut her eyes. She hardly noticed Steve and Natasha still standing in the hall until they approached.

Andy looked up, feeling ashamed as she waved off their concern. "I'm fine," she told them. She was inhaling air greedily and the lie was poorly made, but Andy didn't care.

Where was their support five minutes earlier?

It seemed wasted now, judging by the tense atmosphere between Natasha and Steve. They looked like they wanted to argue further, but the group found themselves interrupted interrupted. It was a voice, calling for both Steve and Andrea.

The Jones woman straightened. She forced herself to take in steely breaths, regaining composure little by little. Andy then turned to watch as Rumlow approach. She frowned at his figure. He was such a grim man─ rough around the edges in a manner that seemed dangerous and foul.

"They want you two back at S.H.I.E.L.D," the agent informed them. Andy felt her expression twist in annoyance, caring little to mask her disagreement.

As much as she understood how S.H.I.E.L.D operated, she had hoped they'd give some pittance of sympathy.

However, she couldn't exactly blame them. The events leading to Fury's death needed to be addressed. Besides, Andy and Steve needed to investigate the matter Nick had divulged to the pair. They needed all the information they could get─ and as quickly as they could get it.

"Alright, we'll be with you in a minute," Andy replied, dismissing Rumlow. She was tired and it was clear that rest wasn't in the cards for her.

Though, as Rumlow's reply came in the form of sharp words, Andy found herself ignited with new energy.

"Now," the agent demanded, and his impatience was a spark lighting flame to anger.

It wasn't just the fact that she was his superior that made his demand bothersome. What irritated her was that, of all moments, he thought now was the best time to test her patience. Who did he think he was to bark orders at her?

  Andrea turned, eyes furious as she met Rumlow's gaze.

However, the agent's expression portrayed no concern as he gave an almost inconceivable smirk. It would be his first mistake. Andrea's temper flared and— in one, swift movement— she had hooked her foot behind his leg and brought him to his knees.

Rumlow winced upon the unexpected impact. He reared his head up to snap in response, but Andrea's glare was much fiercer than his. Brock faltered, his teeth bared.

"Maybe you didn't hear me the first time, but I thought I was pretty clear when I asked you to wait," she seethed.

"And the next time you address your superiors, you'd be wise to lose the attitude." Andrea tried and failed to keep the sneer off her expression as she lectured the lesser man.

Rumlow's features were visibly enraged as he got up, but nothing more was said as he turned and stormed away. Andrea watched him go, annoyance still coursing through her.

When he was gone, the brunette finally turned to look at Natasha. But, at the sight of the Romanoff woman smirking, Andy drew a confused expression.

"You both suck at lying," was all Natasha said before, she too, left the group. Andy pursed her lips, looking to Steve only when the red-head had disappeared from sight.

It was just the two of them, tasked with figuring out whatever mystery it was that Fury had left behind. All anger, irritation, and suspicion aside, they had to look out for each other.

But, as Andrea watched Steve turn to stare at the vending machine beside them, she couldn't help but furrow her brow and wonder what exactly it was they were getting into─ and would they be able to survive?

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It wasn't long after they'd left the hospital that Andrea had quickly come to the conclusion that they were ultimately doomed.

"You're an idiot," she stated, refusing to look in the direction of the Rogers man. The tone of her voice indicated that the words were more fact than much else and─ at the insult─ Steve kept his silence.

As they continued down the halls of S.H.I.E.L.D's headquarters, Andy glanced up at the blond. His jaw was tense and she had to resist a smirk.

"I mean, what were you thinking? I leave for five minutes and you make the world's biggest mistake." Andrea's taunts were quick to earn her an irritated look as the two entered an elevator.

In her defense, she had every right to be harping on him. She couldn't believe he'd entrusted the hard drive Fury had given them into a vending machine. But, she was also trying to get on his nerves for a reason, and judging by Steve's face, it was working.

At this point, it seemed like any emotional response from him was better than the cold front he'd put up since they'd left the hospital.

Steve glanced at her, "You know, you're being extra annoying today."

Andy said nothing, turning to look out at the city as they rose above it. Glass elevators were a modern touch she enjoyed. As she stared out at the massive skyscrapers and the bustling streets below, she gave a small hum of acknowledgement.

"Yeah, well, haven't I told you?" She glanced back at the Rogers man, a weak smile on her lips.

"Being annoying is my forte and I have a soft spot for you." Andrea knew it was a feeble attempt to joke around and lighten the mood, but she couldn't help it.

She wanted to feel something─ anything─ other than the mind-numbing grief. How could Steve not see that? Maybe he simply didn't want to. Andy felt her heart tighten at the thought. What sort of strain was this putting on their relationship?

She watched with a frown as the Rogers man shot her a smile that looked more like a grimace. It was quiet for a few moments after that and, when she could no longer stand it, Andrea heaved a sigh.

"Come on, usually I'd at least get a laugh," she told him, nudging at his arm with hers. The words were softly spoken, as if it would ease the weight of the approaching conversation. Though, she knew it wouldn't.

Steve stared at the doors, arms crossed across his chest. "Yeah, well, usually we trusted each other with things. But you've been pretty secretive lately and don't think for a second I believe the shooter just got away."

The accusation was sharp─ but not unexpected.

Lying beneath the words, there was a question suited more like a demand; what happened? Andy felt the ghost of a smile pass over her lips. She'd never expected Steve to buy into her lie about not capturing the assassin.

She was one of the most skilled agents on the field and finding him should have been well within with her special capabilities. So, why hadn't she stopped him? Better yet, why had she let him get away?

The half-smile fell as Andrea recalled the fight. There was nothing to be happy about anymore as she recalled her failure; her weakness.

"I'm sorry," she began, her mouth feeling dry. "I wasn't strong enough to stop him." She felt her fingers curl into shaking fists.

Andy tried to keep her eyes on the city below, but she was blinded by her sorrow. Blinking, she felt a tear fall from her eye. Her vision cleared with its absence and Andy was quick to swipe away the evidence.

She couldn't bring herself to look at Steve; couldn't bare to see his reaction to her vulnerability. She felt so stupid.

Before he could say anything more, the Jones girl continued, "Call me a coward, I don't care. I ran when I had the chance, but I swear it won't happen again." Andy held conviction in her voice.

Grief and sadness were a heavy weight to carry, but she was quick to harden her heart. There were more important things than her own pain.

"Right now, I'm not sure who to trust," Andy had only just spoke, but she was aware of the way Steve tensed at her words. "But I've never doubted you─ not for a second."

Andy turned to face him, and was glad to see him relax. He still wasn't looking at her, but he was listening, and that was enough.

"Don't doubt me, and please, trust that I know what I'm doing," she said softly. Steve finally cut his gaze to hers and Andy could only hope that he saw the sincerity in her expression.

But, it was a falsity, because she had absolutely no idea what she was doing.

Andy bit down hard on her tongue. Steve had every right to doubt her and she knew it. She had lied about her memories─ and when confronted with the question about how she survived, she had withheld the truth from him again. If she told him that she was unsure of herself and where she stood, then what?

Steve was all she had left, and time and time again, she only continued to hurt him.

Andrea turned away as she thought back to what she'd said the night before. The guilt she felt was deserved, it made her sick. But, she knew now wasn't the time to dwell on it or the time to apologize.

Halting, the Jones girl realized that, if not now, then when? The thought was jarring and scary. Who was to say she'd ever get another chance?

Andy opened her mouth to speak, but was cut off as Steve replied, "Maybe if you actually trusted me with the truth, I wouldn't doubt you."

He looked at her then, gaze meaningful. "Maybe I'd understand," he told her, urging Andy to open up in a way that she couldn't. Not here, not now.

Andrea pursed her lip and knew that, even despite the risks, she still had a duty to him as his friend to say something.

So, she said the only thing that she knew she could tell him, "I do trust you─ more than anyone on this planet."

She tried not to hesitate as she continued, "I know we don't have a lot of it right now, but I need time. Just a little time." Every word was spoken with the sole intent of fixing whatever rift had been spreading between them.

"But, what I need even more than that, is you beside me." She looked at him, and could feel her heart breaking. Andy wanted to pour out every secret inside of her so desperately.

She looked at the floor, "I need you to be sure of who I am, when I can't be sure of it myself." Andy inhaled sharply, suddenly overcome with the remembrance of her grief.

Still, she pushed passed the way it choked her voice, "But, if you lose trust in me, then I'm going to lose everything and I've already lost you once." Andy tried to ignore the way her eyes stung as she looked up at him.

She was so desperate for him to believe her.

Steve stood silent as they held each other's gazes and, with every second that passed, Andrea felt her heart begin to plummet. It was only when she could no longer handle the dreadful silence that the Rogers man finally spoke.

He sighed, averting his eyes, "I know, I'm sorry for pushing you." He looked back at her with a sad smile. "But, I'll always be here when you need me, Andy. You know that."

Hesitantly, Steve wrapped an arm around her shoulder to bring the Jones girl close. As he placed a kiss on the top of her head, Andy felt as if though she could cry with gratitude.

  She was warmed with the comfort of Steve's gesture. It was home. He reminded her that, when all else was lost, he would always be there for her to come back to.

As the elevator arrived at their floor, the pair stepped out of their embrace. Andrea thought back to what Fury had said about S.H.I.E.L.D. If it weren't for her suspicion, she would have spilled everything to Steve by now.

However, they were no longer safe.

  The doors slid open and both Steve and Andy stepped out, starting for the path down a long hall. As they entered an area resembling a waiting room, a secretary stood from behind a desk.

"Steve Rogers, Andrea Jones," the woman gestured to a closed office door, "He'll be with you in a moment." Andrea assumed that she meant Alexander Pierce.

  As a secretary on the World Security Council, Pierce was responsible for overseeing S.H.I.E.L.D. He had personally appointed Fury as the Director as well, and thus they'd been called to a meeting to discuss his death.

  Still, it all felt too soon, in a sense.

Andy sighed, wrapping her arms around herself. She started for the door, with Steve following close behind. She had no desire to wait on the council. Andrea wanted to get this over and done with.

  But, as the office door opened and Agent 13 stepped out, Andy and Steve slowed. The Rogers man immediately bristled and his reaction was an annoyance to Andrea. She tsked.

"Captain. Andrea," Kate acknowledged as she passed.

In spite of the name, Andy nodded. Though, Steve didn't glance in the agent's direction. Andrea recalled how a week prior, Steve had tried to ask her for a casual coffee date, but she declined.

"Neighbour," Steve replied coldly and Andy dug her elbow in his ribs.

Steve returned her gesture with a scowl and she easily responded with a glare. His new, uptight attitude was starting to get on her nerves. Agent 13 was following orders, it was her duty.

Andy couldn't hold that against her, but Steve was a whole other matter. He held a grudge like it was nobody's business. It was a nuisance in most cases.

The two entered Pierce's office and Andy let her gaze wander. It was such a minimalistic space filled with variations of grey, black, and dark blue. She huffed.

It was predictable; a serious tone for a serious setting.

Finally, Andy found her eyes catching on the figure of an older man. His hair was golden, with flecks of white appearing just at the edges. Wrinkles lightly lined his features, a testament to a moderately long life.

  It was possible that his appearance could have been warm, if it weren't for how cold his eyes were. There was something in his gaze that sent a chill down Andrea's spine as his gaze met hers. Eyes like those belonged to someone who knew things, and he had no intention of disclosing his vast expanse of knowledge.

This was Alexander Pierce.

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