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4. I Carry Your Heart With Me

The seven losers walked through the deserted streets of Derry as the sun began to rise.

They arrived on the edge of town where the woods were at.

"The Barrens," Beverly spoke first, looking around.

"This is where we came after the rock fight," Katherine stated.

"The clubhouse," Richie added.

Beverly laughed, looking at Ben. "You built that for us."

"Yeah, the hatch has gotta be around here someplace."

Katherine walked forward. "That was my safe place when Seth was..." Eddie looked at her in concern. "It's nothing. It was a long time ago-"

Katherine suddenly tripped over a fallen large branch which led Bill to catch her in his arms. "Whoa. Are you okay?" he asked her.

Katherine smiled at him. "Yeah," she answered.

He noticed her sparkling gaze and asked, "What?"

"Nothing. Just a rush of nostalgia," she answered. "Probably one of the moments first moments I fell in love with you."

Bill grinned back her. "I was always in love with you," he told her, kissing her forehead and taking her hand in his.

Katherine chuckled. "Even in shitty times, you make me love you more."

"You know what?" Ben asked, walking further. "I actually think the door was more like..." His foot kept tapping at the ground. "Around-" Suddenly, Ben fell through a small hole in the ground, a loud thump was heard upon impact. "Found it," Ben shortly said.

Katherine rushed over. "Ben," she called in concern.

"I'm okay!" he told her. "Come down."

Katherine began to step down the ladder-

She was the first down after Ben, then Beverly and shortly the others came down as well.

"What the dick is this?" Richie asked. "How'd you build it?"

"And when did you build it?" Bill asked.

"Here and there, I guess," Ben answered. "It was already dug out from something so I just had to reinforce the walls and get some wood for the roof door, and that's pretty much it. Pretty good for my first time, huh?" Ben asked before leaning against a pillar making one of top sheets of metal collapse.

"Now that's a cool feature," Richie says. "What happens when you put your hand on the other pillar, professor?"

"Regardless, Ben," Katherine spoke. "It's still fucking amazing. But it could use a little decorating." She looked towards the wall. "How about a movie poster right there?" She noticed Ben's happy gaze at the fact that she was enjoying the place he built. "What?"

Ben smiled. "I don't think I ever expected someone like you to be as nice as you are."

"Someone like me?"

"Pretty, mean to other people who aren't their friends..."

"Oh."

Katherine didn't notice Bill scrunched his nose in distaste as Ben called her pretty. Usually, Bill would call her pretty, no one else.

"Okay, you see, this is exactly why there are safety codes, why we have permits," Eddie began. "This place is a death trap. You understand that?"

"Well, it's a work in progress, okay, Eddie?"

"Just so you know, I get hurt, you're reliable. And also, what is this? The switch of an iron maiden?" he hit at a hanging object.

Katherine giggled. "That's a flashlight, Eds."

He poked at something else. "And what is that? A horse hitch? When do you have horses down..." He picked up Ben's paddle ball. "Oh, this is cool."

"That was like three dollars, so be careful with that, please," Ben stated.

"I have one of these." Eddie began to hit the ball with the paddle. "Hey, Stan, you see this?"

The ball tapped Stan's cheek constantly so Stan asked, "Yeah, okay, can you maybe not-"

"Maybe not what? Yeah, yeah. Hold on. Maybe not what? Be awesome and have fun and celebrate the magic of the paddle ball?" Eddie suddenly let go of the paddle, the ball falling off and rolling into a wood pallet. "Wow. Oh, good going fucknut. You broke his thing," Eddie stated.

"I broke it?" Stan asked.

"Yeah, you broke it with your face."

"What?"

Katherine walked over grabbing Stan's face in one handful. "Hey, Stan has a great face. Don't hate because he's beautiful." As she said this, she squished his face which caused him to smile. "Now pick up the ball, Eddie."

"I'm not putting my fucking hand down there," Eddie replied.

Eddie picked up the dusty paddle ball from the wood pallet.

Katherine grabbed the Lost Boys from the movie poster hanging on the wall. She turned it over, looking at the back.

It was in her handwriting that she wrote: To the loser's clubhouse, from your favorite blond loser, K.P.

"Hey, losers," a gravelly voice spoke which made everyone tense up as they turned to a dark corner where the voice was coming from. Katherine grasped the sleeve of Eddie's jacket in fear. "Time to float."

Richie came out of the dark corner, laughing at everyone's expression as Katherine walked backward and tripped over a small box falling on her butt as Bill banged his head above.

"What the fuck, Richard Tozier?" Katherine hissed.

"Remember when he use to say that shit?" Richie asked, still grinning. "And he'd do that little dance." He mocked Pennywise's dance to which everyone shook their heads. "Am I the only one who remembers this shit?"

"I would've remembered that...if you didn't make me fall on my ass," Katherine remarked.

"Are you going to be like this the entire time we're home?" Eddie asked, helping Katherine up with Ben's help.

"All right," Richie shrugged. "Just trying to add some levity to this shit. I'll go fuck myself."

Katherine chuckled but something caught her eye. It was crumpled up papers stuffed under a small pillow that she brought to the clubhouse.

She pushed the pillow aside to see these papers were in her handwriting. She picked a paper up, unraveling it, it was another song she wrote.

I'm gonna walk down the lane of true love
Not gonna bend or break
It's in all of us
Could it be right?
Could it be right?
Could it be?
Would it be right if we would stop this fight?
Would it be right if we would stop tonight?

In the corner, Bill picked up a coffee can.

"Hey, you guys," Bill spoke up, earning everyone's attention. "St-t-t-t-tanely, 'for the use of l-l-losers only'," he read.

"What's inside?" Katherine asked.

Bill removed the lid...

Stanely opened the lid off the coffee can he brought down and handed a shower cap to Richie who was sitting on the hammock.

"The fuck is this?" Richie asked, grabbing the shower cap.

"Stanley, we're not afraid of fucking spiders," Richie replied, dropping his shower cap. Once Stanley walked away, Richie looked up to see everyone was wearing a shower cap. "I stand corrected."

Beverly smiled, lighting her cigarette. "That's a first."

"Touché," he replied.

Katherine plopped down in her tiny stool that was close to Bill in front of Stan at a checker board. "Are y-y-y-you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" Katherine replied. Bill's eyes flickered the bruised handprint on her arm. She instinctively covered her arm with her hand. "That's-It's nothing," she told him.

"M-M-Maybe you s-should move out," Bill told her.

"I will. Once I go to college. My dream is to go to Yale but I don't think I'll be going."

"Why?" Stan asked.

"Because it's in big school and looking at there I come from, they wouldn't except me."

"I'd go," Richie said as he pushed Eddie's foot away from his face upon hearing Katherine talk about Yale. "I'll do that. I'll do anything to get the hell out of Derry."

"

Man, when I graduate, I'm going to Florida," Mike stated.

"What's in Florida, Mikey?" Katherine asked, making her move on the checker board.

"I don't know. Guess it's just a place I always wanted to go," Mike replied with a smile resting on his lips.

"Stan, you should go with Mike to Florida," Richie told the boy who was playing checkers with Katherine. "You're already half eighty. You'd clean up with all the grandmas."

Most laughed but Stan asked, "Do you guys think still be friends?" Everyone looked to him. "When we're older?"

"What?" Ben asked. "Why wouldn't we be?"

"What's on your mind, Stan the Man?" Katherine asked her best friend.

"Do any of your parents hang out with their friends from middle school?" Stan asked. "Things might be different then. We all could be different."

With his sock covered foot, Eddie knocked Richie's glasses off his face before smacking Richie's face with his foot.

"We'll s-still be friends," Bill told him. "I don't think that goes away because we g-get older."

"Yeah, come on, Stan," Bev spoke. "You don't have to be so-"

"Sad," Beverly spoke now in the present.

Everyone was silent, all mourning Stanley Uris.

Katherine wiped a lone tear as her eyes moved to the spot where Stan would sit when they played checkers.

"He was old before his time," Ben spoke.

"Yeah, I wonder what he was like all grown up," Eddie added.

"Probably what he was like as a kid," Richie said.

"The best," Katherine finished.

"All right, Mike. What are we doing here?" Richie asked.

Mike stood up. "The ritual. To perform it. It requires a sacrifice."

"Sacrifice? I nominate Eddie."

Eddie turned to Richie. "Wait, what?" he asked with shock in his tone.

"Because you're little. You'll fit on a barbeque..."

"I'm 5'9". That's like average height for most of the world."

"And we are not becoming a cult and sacrificing my pal, okay?" Katherine added, wrapping an arm around Eddie.

"Okay, if anything. We'll sacrifice you because you're a little hobit," Richie told her.

"I may be short but I'll still strangle you."

"You can't reach."

"God only lets things grow until they're perfect." She glanced up Richie's form. "Some of us didn't take as long as others."

"It's not that kind of s-s-s-sacrifice, guys," Bill spoke, interrupting their banter.

"The past is buried. But you're going to have to dig it up. Piece by piece. And these pieces, these artifacts, that's why we're here. They are what you sacrifice. And since Stan isn't here to find his, I figure we should all be here together to find his artifact."

Eddie pulled his shower cap on his head. "I think Bill just did that," he stated.

Shortly, everyone climbed out of the clubhouse.

"Okay, Mike, so how do we find our tokens?" Eddie asked.

"I gotta be honest, man, all due respect," Richie began. "This is fucking stupid. Why do we need tokens, all right? We already remember everything. Saving Bev, defeating IT. We're all caught up."

"It's not everything," Mike stated. "We fought but what happened after that?"

"W-We can't remember, can we?" Bill asked.

"See? There's more to the story that happened that summer," Mike added. "And those blank spaces are pages of our book. That's what you need to find. We need to split up. You each need to find your artifact, alone. That's important. When you do, meet me at the library tonight."

"I gotta say," Eddie said. "Statistically speaking, we're looking at better survival scenarios as a group."

"Yeah, I agree. Splitting up seems like every character's mistake in a horror movie," Katherine added. "I would know that because-"

"Yeah, yeah. You're in American Horror Story and your character makes dumb decisions, we know," Richie cuts off. "But she's not wrong. Splitting up would be dumb, man," Richie said, agreeing with the two. "We gotta go together. We were together that whole summer, right?"

"No, N-Not that whole summer," Bill told him.

Everyone knew what Bill was talking about. The moment Eddie broke his arm and Katherine broke her foot to which Mrs. Kaspbrak drove them to a hospital. Richie and Bill fought to cause a rift between the losers. Beverly on Bill's side to fight while the rest of the losers were on Richie's side to stay alive.

Katherine didn't remember much, mostly because after she left the hospital, she was blazing it up with random kids at Hemlock Park.

"All of us were drifting apart after we went into Neibolt for the first time," Katherine spoke, "We were all on our own at that point. We have to now uncover our artifacts alone just as we were at that time. I get it now."

"I-I-I-It will be okay," Bill reassured his wife as she went into his arms to hug him tightly before they all went their separate ways.

***

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