( CHAPTER SIX! )

( COLIN AND HIS BABY )

•

His decision to be a less of an asshole to the people who were kind to him plus a week had led him to Liz Allan's party.

To be honest, he didn't know how he ended up drinking with Flash, helping him choose songs which the process included lots of bickering and bantering. He was able to smile and relax for a while though, it was all that mattered.

He didn't know how he ended up in the tub, with weed in hand, laughing as he listened to Sam, telling stories about the first half of freshman year that Colin had missed, either.

As much as it felt like a blessing to let go, all of it felt rather fake. He wasn't this relaxed person who could sit close to someone else without feeling sick. He wasn't this person who didn't think about his brother and his well-being or his father an what he was up to or his sister and the life she was having without them.

For that night he was trying to be someone else, blaming it on the alcohol (what a cliché. He hated clichés.) It was easier when the smoke was clouding his judgment but he had been down this road before and he knew he was actually still himself enough to feel a little guilty.

It was just easier to pretend like he was wasted when he was just slightly tipsy.

The bliss lasted only until Flash came chiming in any way.

"Your little baby lost his shit, dude."

Colin raised his brows and looked back and forth between Sam and Flash until he realized Flash was talking to him. "My what did what now?"

"Parker. He is acting crazy," Flash stated so naturally that Colin wasn't quick to register what he was saying. Without asking first, Flash sat in the tub that wasn't large enough for the trio, his legs were dangling by the edge of it like the rest of them. Colin was squished between the two boys for a moment, his breath hitched and he got up.

"He is drinking? I wouldn't have taken him for a party animal."

"I'm still shocked Parker showed up at a party, man. It's a first."

Colin sighed and his wasted persona slipped away, a frown appeared on his face and Sam had realized the change since he was giving him concerned looks. "Where is he?"

"You'll see once you find the crowd," Flash said with a smirk and shrugged.

"You don't have to go-"

"I'll find you later," Colin cut Sam midsentence.

He practically jogged to the living room and was welcomed with the people's cheering 'chunk' over and over again. He gritted his teeth, he was really not that high enough for this, not at all.

He pushed people away and his jaw almost hit the floor when he saw Peter in the middle, with a tie around his forehead, with a cup in his hand, with people around him that was cheering on him to drink more.

Colin stepped forward when Peter tripped on nothing while dancing but he wasn't close enough and people weren't letting him pass through. Fortunately, a curly-headed girl (he realized she was Gwen after a moment) pulled Peter back on his feet while he was laughing hysterically.

"Thank you, Gwen! You see, she is nice. To Gwen!"

The crowd screamed back, "To Gwen!"

This was bad.

Two of Peter's friends (only friends? He was always with Ned and Aamir) were trying to stop it all but they weren't successful enough. Some people were recording and Colin almost broke some of their phones while trying to stop them from getting a clear shot. (In his head, he was smashing them with everything he got but in reality, he was just pushing their hands away.)

And that was it. The hectic 'new me' week that had led to this situation, Colin dragging Peter out of the crowd, snatching his joint away.

"Peter! This is not you- why are you even doing this?"

Colin must've been imagining things because Peter didn't look that drunk now, glaring at him with fire in his eyes. "You cannot say what is me and what's not, you don't even know me! Well, you know me as much as I know you which is basically nothing. I'm trying to help you and you ditch me, you hang out with my bullies, you are constantly wearing that frown of yours and still, everybody likes you! Everybody is curious about you, you know how many people asked me to be your tutor instead of me? People who didn't even talk to me before."

"So you're trying to make a point. Make people like you by acting like a fool? Sure doesn't work on me, Parker," Colin bit back and he was almost positive Peter was gonna punch him across the face. He didn't but he looked hurt by it. Colin felt guilty, right after.

"You're an asshole." It was true. For example, he was still thinking whether it was about Liz or not. Was Peter trying to get her attention? "No, really. Calling me a fool? You can't know what I feel or think! Everything is changing, I'm changing and I don't know how to handle it. Peter Parker is not enough. So screw you for disregarding how I feel and why I feel this way."

Tears were clouding Peter's sight and he wiped them with his sleeves, looking younger than he already was. And for the first time, Colin really saw Peter, not as the cute geeky boy who had a sunny smile and a kind heart. Colin saw Peter who was broken terribly but pretended so good that Colin didn't even realize before.

Colin liked to think that broken people herd together by nature, they understood each other better and judged less. Flash, Sam, and Colin worked well together, they didn't ask questions. There was just acceptance.

To see Peter so crushed for a reason that was unknown to Colin, it broke his heart a little.

"Everyone has their masks on all the time. I'm not ditching you, I need to pick my brother up from school and cook for him and care for him. I'm studying my ass off and it feels like I don't progress at all. I don't sleep," he sighed and bit his lip. He didn't want to share more, this conversation was too personal for Colin's taste anyway. "Only you can feel what you feel, okay? I don't know the things that made you act the way you did tonight and you don't know the things that keep me up at night."

Maybe the first time since they met, the silence was extremely uncomfortable. It came with the fact that they had both poured their hearts out and shared their private thoughts with a person they barely even knew. Colin just wanted to lie down and close his eyes and sleep.

"You're right. Sorry for calling you an asshole," Peter said and Colin nodded in acknowledgment. "You're just a jerk and a little bit wise," Colin snorted at that and the tightness around his heart eased a little. "Also... I didn't know you had a brother. Guess, I don't know you either. Can we forget about this night?"

"We can. But I doubt the rest of the school can forget you as the party animal."

"Oh, god. No," Peter laughed and facepalmed, his laughter making Colin smile (so did his horrified groans.)

"We should head back. You caused a scene back there. Ned is going to kill me. Aamir already slightly scared by you-"

"I don't care," Colin muttered whilst his eyes scanned the area. They were fairly away from all the noise, they were just at the edge of the garden with a couple of trees shielding them from anyone looking outside.

Colin sat down without a warning, crossing his legs on the ground. He ignored the surprise in Peter's gaze as he tilted his chin upwards to face him. His face was impassive but his tone was soft as he spoke. "C'mon. Sit with me, will you?"

"What're you playing at, Archer?"

"Just shut up. Like, for once," Colin rolled his eyes and made a gesture with his head for him to sit down. Peter obeyed with a curious glint in his eyes. "Really wanna smoke? Do it with me."

Colin's lips curled upwards and he faced away to hide it from Peter, as the other boy sat right next to him. Close enough to make him uncomfortable but he simply wasn't. His brain automatically blamed the intoxicated state of mind for his behavior and he let himself relax.

"Rule number one of using substance, don't. It's unhealthy and unnecessary. If you really want to though, do it with someone you trust and who knows their shit. So, you probably shouldn't do it with me but..."

Peter giggled, actually giggled and Colin felt sober. Trying to avoid Peter's gaze since he was not ready to face him yet he dug up his lighter from his pocket and lit the joint he had snatched from Peter. He could almost feel Peter's soft chocolate brown eyes on him as he closed his. Placing his hands on the slightly cool grass he inhaled and leaned back with his head thrown back, let the smoke take a hold of his lungs and it stunk. It left a bitter taste on his tongue and his lungs screamed in agony but it also calmed his mind as he let the smoke back out real slow.

"You game?"

Peter was not hesitant as he took the joint from Colin's hand, but his inexperience was showing even from the way he was holding it. So when he inhaled and fell into a coughing spree, Colin was not surprised at all. In all honesty, Peter looked adorable with his eyes wide open in surprise and he was crimson red from the effort as he tried to hide how defeated his face looked.

"Woah! I already feel high."

"You didn't even inhale properly. It takes several minutes and a few drags to affect you anyway," Colin was laughing very openly at Peter's misery as he coughed his lungs out. "You are such a baby. Give it back."

"What? Me? I thought I was a kid."

"Twelve years olds smoke better than you, baby."

Colin's eyes widened and Peter chocked on nothing, trying to cover his embarrassment by coughing all over again. It was rare but Colin was flushing now, from his neck to his ears. Thankfully it was dark. In his defense, he hadn't meant to use the word 'baby' like that. He had sounded so... intimate.

Woah, kids. Smoking was bad and it was doing some things to his thoughts.

"I'll prove it to you, tough boy. Give it back."

"No."

"Colin!"

"Parker, no. You don't have to throw up your lungs."

Peter sighed and Colin grinned. Suddenly he was struck by a brilliant idea (that he would never even think about it with a sober mind. At least that what he would tell himself at night after that very moment, to ease the sinking feeling in his stomach.)

"Unless. We can do something else."

"Like what?"

Colin turned to face Peter with his upper body, moving a bit closer to the other boy in the process. "Part your lips when I let the smoke out. Take it easy."

Peter looked confused, stars struck was more likely. Colin tried to control the blood that was rushing to his face and the flood of his blood was trumping in his ears and he gulped down. Relax. He took a long drag with his eyes closed. When he opened them, he found Peter was watching intently with his lips slightly parted. Colin leaned in and before he exhaled, he touched Peter's jaw, guiding him to widen his mouth and bringing him a bit closer.

He blew the smoke, trying to aim at Peter's lips and he was just glad that he was able to stare openly. They stood so close, he could almost feel the warmth of his lips on his own or his mind was playing a delightful trick on him. It wasn't even lustful or he wasn't driven by desire. There was this undeniable joy because he was so open and close to someone and he didn't feel afraid. Colin was free for a brief moment that stretched into hours in his head.

Peter was blinking rapidly as he was struggling not to cough. (And even that wasn't covering how flushed and frustrated he looked.) Once Colin was moving away Peter was coughing still but this time it was more controlled than the first.

His heart was beating really fast and even the chilly wind was not helping him cool down. The embarrassment was too evident in his worried eyes, afraid that he might have crossed a line there. He had definitely crossed some of the lines he had drawn for himself. All was forgotten once Peter was smiling bright and proud.

Colin smiled right back.

He was feeling an endless amount of guilt for letting Peter do this but some part of him was too pleased with himself for being the one to taint someone so pure. He felt privileged for being there with Peter and it was a whole different kind of high for him.

He put the joint out despite Peter's protest and flopped on to the grass on his back, not doubting for a second that Peter wouldn't lay next to him.

"How'd you like it?"

"Uh, I hate it," Peter said with finality. Colin frowned. "I mean, I liked it more when you helped but... It's so bitter and my throat hurts. But also I like how I feel right now."

"Like what?"

"Like...  I can do anything. Everything seems possible."

"You can do everything, for some weird reason, I know you can," Colin said, believing in his words. "'Don't have to do this stupid shit to impress anyone. They all drink and smoke and pretend to enjoy it to fit in, to prove themselves."

"Woah, I should record this. You're being so sweet to me."

Colin elbowed him playfully. "Shut up, Parker."

That night, Colin barely slept with thoughts lingering in his head, all tracing back to Peter Parker, his sad eyes or his genuine smile. At least when he did sleep for a couple of hours it was a peaceful one. And when two days later a masked vigilante made an appearance he didn't even pay attention to it, already getting lost in Peter Parker to care too much about other drama.

•

( AUTHOR'S NOTE! )

edited. hmm not really.

colin encourage Peter to embrace his alter ego without knowing it. that will cause lots of problems in the future. and finally we are moving with the spider-man stuff, get ready for a very paranoid and overprotective colin!

ps, i dont support underage drinking smoking etc but i did in highschool and idk its a part of that experience for some people i guess

anyways let me know what you think!