"Feelings"

I want to fit in but unable to,
It's too hard and too uncomfortable,
I feel unstable.

I wish people feel same as me,
Let them know my position,
How i am locked without a key.

Unfortunately I can't change me,
Stuck in this loop for free.

Atleast they can try to be friendly,
Is it too hard to accept me?
I am too far off the shore,
Don't know how to swim.

Feels like no one wants me there,
It's too forced and mere.
A little bit more effort would be nice,
As said by a man who was wise.

Sometimes I don't know what to say,
Just end the conversation with a hey.
I might be rude to you for that,
But it was courageous for me.
Only few knows the feeling,
It is so compelling.

I am the one who is left behind,
While two besties chat,
Acting like they are kind.

~