We ended up skipping an entire period. Not really talking. It was more of an intense and rejuvenating make out session. It felt like a hell of a dream. I ended up getting to math with a smile, three too many noticible hickeys, and way messier hair. I was in a happy daze, not really paying attention to anything.

A teacher asked me if I was high. I simply laughed. I'm high, alright. High on life! It's never been better, I swear. I couldn't wait for the moment the final bell rang. Means I finally got to see Kiku again. And we could finally go to his house and spend the rest of the day binging all kinds of things and sleeping and just enjoying the afternoon. I felt light for most of the day.

I grew heavy again when my mind wandered in my last class. It was sunny out and it reminded me of summer. I really wish it was summer so I could back to eating popsicles while switching through the channels because there's never anything on TV. Maybe then I wouldn't have had that melt down in the bathroom.

Summer is kind of hellish though. Wearing anything is risky. Hours of flipping through channels is only after hours of figuring out something suitable to wear that would suffocate me but also wouldn't show too much. So summer never really is a break. At least school is somewhat of a distraction.

I wish I was kid again. I mean, sure, I was waiting to be adopted but at least I held some optimism. I was a protector too. I protected Matt, telling him everything was going to be fine, making sure he would smile every chance I could get. That would make me happy. Now I'm the one who constantly needs saving and I feel like a shitty brother that way. I really wonder if he gets sick of me never being home anymore. Maybe he's just as sick and tired of me as Arthur is. 

The bell rang and I left the room far worse than I came in. Kiku didn't look to happy about my expression when I met up with him out front. He tried to pry but I didn't answer any of his questions. I kind of caused an awkward amount of silence because of that. It was making me extremely anxious. 

"So," I began not really sure where I was going. Then I remembered what Lovi had told me earlier. "I heard there was a dance soon." 

"And you want to go?" 

"Kind of. We don't have to if you don't want to, though."

"I think we should go."

"Really?" I almost tripped on my own feet. The confusion basically rippled through my body at his sudden declaration. 

"I don't see why we shouldn't go." 

"I thought since we usually don't go-"

"I think it would be nice. It wouldn't kill us to get out of my basement." 

"Fair point." 

~

Kiku's house is literally two lines split down the middle. Loud on one end, silent on the other. The louder side was filled to the brim with all kinds of tech. The silent side looked old fashioned and you could actually see the wood on the walls when weird knickknacks and china weren't lining the walls. It was something you'd build in the Sims with the mix of a grandmother's house. 

And I loved being here. There's something beautiful about the mess of a family he has and they make me feel at home here. However, some of them can get quite handsy and weird. I still like coming. I'd live here if it were not for Arthur having custody of me.

I think my biggest probably is how much they want to stuff me with food. Dinner is always like a party in this house and I have to force myself to go over my limit. It hurts but the food is so good that I forget I'm overeating.

Like I said, I love it here.  I forget all my worries here.

Kiku's room is especially my favorite. Not for anything sexual, I swear. I just like being around everything that's his. It's way more comforting than anything else. He's got this natural grassy lemonade type scent that I just can't get enough of. Anything that's his also gives off this calm vibe. Maybe that's why his shirt that I use as a pillow case make me pass out. It's the closest thing I could get to him being next to me. It's kind of funny because when he is there he keeps me awake. Again, nothing sexual. We have this weird habit of staying up late just talking. Going from a bad anime's plot to the philosophy of water. It never really makes much sense but it flows. We just go and go until we can't keep our eyes open anymore. And it never really matters what we're talking about it. It'll always end the same. With a so quiet-it's-baffling-I'm-able-to-hear- it 'I love you'.

It's another reason why I love his room so much. It's full of good memories that keep me up at night with a big grin. And sure, there are some bad memories too. Like the time we got into a fight over me sneaking out of my house just to crawl through his window or the time I came home from a vacation and found him as an absolute mess because he refused to get out of bed. We're each other's protector in a way. Always keeping watch of each other. It's nice.

This old fashioned Japanese looking room is like my own personal box full of memories. It's the good box not that sad one I see sitting at home in the basement.

"You seem off today." Kiku's simply stated as he sat down on his bed, legs crossed as usual.

"Did the mental breakdown not give you enough of a hint?"

"That's not what I mean." I dropped my backpack onto the floor letting it land with a thud. "You seem more anxious than usual. Is something wrong?"

"Nope! Everything's fine." I answered with a light smile. It was partially true. I know I'm exaggerating a bit but when I'm with him everything really is fine. In the outside world, not so much. "I'm not sure what's making me anxious, maybe I'm just being stupid again." I chuckled as if I made a joke and hopped on to his bed. I stretched out a bit before letting myself sink into the comfortable bed.

"You're not stupid, Al."

"Sure I am. Today I kept trying to open my locker and it took me ten minutes to realize that I was one locker over from mine." He smiled at that one.

"You're really letting your life just fall apart, hm?"

"It doesn't take much effort, really. Addictions work like a catalyst too."

"And what exactly is your addiction?"

"You."