Dear Diary,

I've found out that getting into the van wasn't the smartest decision I've ever made.

I should have known better, I know, but the candy was just so appealing. Yeah,

I know I'm currently sitting on a weird furry bed while the creepy snake guy is brushing my soft hair,

whispering things into my ear. Apparently I would look good sitting on a swing and

the lollypop I'm currently eating makes me look cute. I'm not entirely sure what this guy wants.

So he just asked me if I was comfortable enough to take of my clothes and I told him I am not gay.

He then responded by saying that he wasn't gay either. Why do I have to take of my clothes then?

I don't get this man.

Alright, this is getting really scary. He just asked me if my peepee ever went up.

He means if I ever had a hard on right? Come on, he can't be serious. You don't ask a guy that.

I wish I brought my closet with me. I could have hidden inside it right about now.

I've had enough. He just called me a little boy and if there is something I dislike it is being called a little boy.

I will tell him what is on my mind right now!

He doesn't believe the fact that I am not an eleven year old boy. I mean seriously.

Do I look like a little boy to you? What do you mean I look rather feminine and

that makes me look like a young boy? My voice is very low, that should at least say enough.

I'll just move away from him and leave as soon as possible. Sasori should be around here somewhere.

Escape plan failed. I am currently stuck in his snake arms. Apparently this guy is really a snake guy,

so my nickname wasn't as weird as I thought. From being stuck in tentacles to being stuck in snakes.

What the hell is going on?

Some guy with glasses on is staring at me and it's creeping me out. Is he a pervert too?

He asked me what I am doing here. How the hell should I know? Ask creepy snake guy over here.

He's the one holding me.

Good, he's also convincing snake dude that I am in fact not an eleven year old boy.

Good job four eyes. This is going great.

He still doesn't believe it, but four eyes is suggesting to do a examination.

I'll do about anything to get out of here. Yes, I can actually help.

He said he was going to show a spot of hair young boys don't have,

so I was very afraid he was going to pull down my pants. Thankfully he just lifted up my arm and

showed him my armpit hair. Fortunately I didn't get to shave it on the clay bird. Otherwise I was in a lot of trouble.

Pervert over there just gave me a disgusting look. How can I be the disgusting one?

Well, I'm out of here.

OMG. Four eyes just threw me out. You should have seen the look on his face. Pure hatred.

I should remember that one. I can use it on Itachi the next time I see him.

Now I am off to find Sasori.

Love, Deidara