Can we all, collectively, make an effort to bring kindness back in style??? Please, I'm tired.

You can be a strongly opinionated person and still be kind and respectful.

I know it's trendy to be savage, sassy, moody, nasty... but you
really don't have to sniff your nose at those with different opinions than yours and shove your beliefs down the throat of every other person you come across. It isn't thy's duty to enlighten all the 'ignorant' and the 'narrow-minded'. Leave some enlightening for the TED Talk hosts, please!

Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with having opinions and being vocal about them, but you don't have to be such an as- cough, so aggressive.

There's been a lot of talk about how toxic Wattpad has become recently.

I don't think it's Wattpad as a whole, I think it's the Desi community specifically that has become so. I have been on this website for nearly ten years, and I didn't face a fraction of the drama I have in the past year alone since I joined this community.

Inline comments have become the bane of my existence, I swear! I still can't believe Wattpad has provided the opportunity for readers to leave their opinions on Every. Single. One of my lines, without giving me the option to turn it off.

You can't leave a really condescending and aggressive comment and call it 'just stating your opinion' or my absolute favourite - 'constructive criticism'.

Sis, there's nothing constructive about what you just said, and you don't possess the credibility to be considered a critic. #sorrynotsorry

I have said it before, books are personal. You can't write pages after pages on something that doesn't come from the heart. Most authors I know write about things they have felt, seen or believe in.

So when you say a mean thing about a book, it's not just a 'comment' on that chapter, it's a personal attack. Some readers don't even attempt to understand the depth behind some stories, they just write whatever comes to their minds regardless of how it may make the recipient feel. Especially on Wattpad, it's so easy to do it when you can just press a button and say whatever without worrying about consequences.

There are times when it's obvious the reader's intention is just to attack the author, nothing more. Even if the comment you left is more logical, and the author of the Bad Boy story has written some truly pitiful scenes, it's still not okay. I have read some threads where I actually cringed at the way some people attempted to 'correct' the authors. Even in cases where I actually agree with the commenter, I ended up sympathising with the recipient more simply because of the way the comment was delivered.

If you're rude, disrespectful and you 'express your opinion' in a manner where you end up attacking the other person, you're doing nothing more than spread hate, know that.

I have personally been at the receiving end of some comments where it's obvious the person hadn't read my writing, or attempted to understand the messages I was trying to convey. Yet, they find it in their hearts to attack my integrity, my sense of morality and at times - my up bringing - with full confidence.

You have absolutely no right to disrespect anyone. When you're reading someone's book, understand you're in the Author's Space. You have to respect that, and their narrative, whether you like it or not.

I may have been called strongly-opinionated once or twice in my life. I'm not exactly shy about my thoughts. Even on Wattpad, I have been extensively vocal about the tropes I find problematic, I have openly questioned traditions that are deeply rooted in my culture (and are often explored by numerous other authors).

But not once, in all my years here, have I ever personally attacked any other writer.

I understand if I call out someone in a public place like Wattpad, or corner them and point out their mistakes, it can be a very humiliating experience for them.

Instead, I choose to express my opinions in my own personal space, addressing them in a general tone. I draw attention to the thing I find problematic, instead of the person who ticked me off.

If you do choose to correct someone via comments, it really won't hurt you to take a moment to ensure you're articulating your thoughts respectfully, instead of just spitting it out in a manner you know will come across as an attack.

I can accept it if I've made a mistake, but I'll not take you seriously, or accept your so-called advice, if you're lacking the most basic pillar of communication - good manners.

I'll be a hypocrite if I pretend I have never left a passive aggressive comment in my life, or that I don't, at times, struggle to keep my cool while dealing with someone whose opinion differs from mine. I slip constantly.

But I also understand it's not okay to do so.

If there's anything my time in Wattpad has taught me, it's to be careful with my words and be heedful about the comments I leave in someone else's work, or in general; because I know the impact it can have.

Though that has led me to be very stingy with my comments these days (it's also my way of silently protesting against inline comments), here's a simple test I put myself through to check my intentions before commenting if I do want to leave a feedback anywhere:

I ask myself why I'm leaving the comment that I'm about to write.

1. Am I pissed at the author because the characters/story strayed from what I envisioned?

2. Am I just trying to get an upper hand over the author by proving them 'wrong?'

3. Am I having trouble giving up control and I'm trying to control someone else's narrative?

If it's none of the above, and the comment I leave is completely harmless- or it can actually prove to be beneficial- I don't hesitate to press the post button. Trying to be mindful about my intention has really helped me put things into perspective.

You won't agree with everything you come across on the internet and that's fine. You don't have to. Taking the extra couple of seconds to assess whether or not your words are mean will not cost you anything other than those seconds!

Choosing to be kind won't make you any less of a cooler person, I promise.