Taehyung

"Why are we back here?" Areum demands angrily, and at this point, I'm sure that she's going to start crying very soon.

"Bubba, I forgot the keys inside our home, and I locked the door. We can't go in without the keys," I answer her patiently once again as I wait holding the car door open for her to get down.

She sulks in a very disappointed manner and climbs out of the car reluctantly, and then we walk up to the front door where Maya is already waiting for us.

Once we are a few feet from the doorway, I stop walking and get down on my knees to face Areum, who has also stopped walking.

"Bubba, you need to wait inside while I go get the door sorted and collect the keys. Okay?"

"I also want to come," she announces, and I knew this was coming my way.

"Bubba, you're sleepy and tired, and if you come with me, you will not be able to sleep. So you stay here for a while with Maya and try to take a nap, and I'll be back soon," I speak again, holding our gazes.

Areum's eyes exhibit tiredness and a bit of disappointment too, but I don't have any other choice now. Taking her along would be hard, and that too when she's sleepy and when I myself am unsure about how long it would take to open the door because I've never been in such a situation before.

Dropping her off with Jang-Mi isn't going to happen as well.

"Appa, don't go," Areum tugs the fabric of my trousers when I get back up on my feet.

My shoulders drop, and I heave a sigh of exhaustion.

"Areum, if I don't go now, how will we get the keys? Don't you want to hold your bunny and sleep in your bed tonight?" I raise my eyebrows at her as a drop of sweat rolls down my temple.

"Don't go," she repeats, her eyes glimmering with a film of tears that are ready to break out, instantly propelling me into panic mode.

This is her deadly weapon which makes me give in every single time, and I'm sure she knows it fully well.

"Hey, hey, bubba. Okay, fine. I'll not go. I'll stay with you here, okay?" I quickly drop the idea of leaving her here, and she presses her lips into a thin line, nodding a little.

Maya who has been waiting for us at the doorway looks a little concerned when we finally step up closer to her.

"I'll stay here for a while with Areum," I inform her, and she okays me with a small smile before her eyes move back to Areum.

We all sit down on the couch and Areum curls up to my side while I wrap an arm around her.

"I want bunny," she begins once again, but this time in an even sadder tone.

"Bunny is at home, and only if you let me go, I will find a way to open the door. If I can't do it myself, I would have to find a locksmith to get it done. Shall I go now?" I ask her as I softly stroke her head over and over.

"Don't go, appa," Areum speaks in a muffled mumble before she climbs onto my lap and clings on tighter by wrapping all her limbs around me.

Leaning back on the couch, I hold her tight, gently stroking her back and patting her while softly uttering some words of reassurance in her ears. She remains completely quiet, and I'm guessing that she has fallen asleep.

It is already 6 pm, and if I don't take care of the door right away, I wouldn't be able to find a locksmith to do the same until tomorrow morning.

And going to bed tonight without her bunny is a big no no. It might end in a world war, which I definitely want to avoid.

So I decide to put her down in bed and head out as quickly as possible.

Carefully rising from the couch while still securely holding on to sleeping Areum, I walk towards Maya's bedroom, and she quietly opens the door for us.

I slowly lay Areum down on the bed, feeling a faint coating of sweat on the side of my neck where she was pressing her head all this while.

Once she seems comfortable, I carefully close the bedroom door behind me, leaving it slightly open and proceed to the kitchen to inform Maya before I leave.

When I get there, I notice that she is just turning off the heat on the stove and transferring a pot of soup onto a coaster that's placed on the island.

"Hey, is she comfortable?" Maya asks in a hushed tone when she sees me.

"Yeah, she's sleeping well. I have to go now and see what can be done," I respond quietly as I lean my hip on the counter and keep my eyes on her.

"Okay, I'll be right here and take care if she wakes up. Inform me what happens, okay?" Maya asks me, and I straighten up before I go closer to her by taking a few steps.

"I will," I use my fingers to push some hair behind her ears and softly caress the side of her face, looking straight into her eyes.

I gently hold her shoulders and make her sit down on one of the bar stools. Positioning myself by resting my hands on either side at the island that's behind her, I lean forward slightly to bring our faces closer.

"I want to kiss you," my voice comes out as a raspy whisper, and Maya laughs softly as she closes the small gap that's remaining in between our bodies and wraps her arms around my neck.

Her eyes stay glued to mine while I lick my lips and lean forward, allowing our lips to meet. Groaning into the kiss, just as I'm about to allow my tongue to tease hers, I hear something that makes my heart stop beating abruptly.

"APPAAAA!" I hear Areum's scream, and then both our eyes fly open before I detach my mouth from Maya's in a split second and glance over her shoulder to look at the kitchen doorway.

To our utter horror, Areum is standing there, burning the whole area down with her angry glare. Maya jumps down from the bar stool and she looks just as terrified as I am because we didn't ever expect Areum to show up like this.

SHIT! SHIT! SHIT!

"APPAA!" She stomps her feet on the floor when she sees me standing still as a statue, and she begins crying loudly.

I break out of my state of shock and rush to her side, picking her up in my arms thereafter.

"What happened, bubba? Why did you wake up?" I ask her as I stroke her back gently in repeated up and down movements.

"Why did you leave me alone?" She cries harder, her whole body shaking from her whimpering.

She has never been so insecure before, but I'm guessing that it could be because of the new place that she slept in.

"I'm so sorry, bubba. I thought you were sleeping deep, and I wanted to go back home to try and open the door," I explain to no avail. She only keeps sobbing and clinging on tighter to me while Maya watches us helplessly.

"Taehyung, do you want to take her to bed in the room upstairs? I think she's tired," Maya speaks doubtfully while I only nod a little in response.

"Noooo! I don't like you, I want to go home," Areum angrily retaliates in response to Maya's offer, taking me by complete surprise.

Never before has she spoken such mean words.

"Bubba, that's not a nic-"

"I don't want her, appa," she screams without letting me finish what I wanted to tell her, and I helplessly glance at Maya, feeling utterly guilty of all the trouble I've brought upon everyone.

Without saying anything more, I head upstairs to the guest bedroom with wailing Areum in my arms.

I'm assuming that her anger is because her sleep got disrupted, but most probably because she also saw us kissing. She hasn't ever seen me kissing her mother, and it was I who told her never to kiss a friend on the mouth. So her anger is justified.

Fortunately, my hands weren't on Maya, otherwise I would have definitely had to answer Areum's questions about why I did a bad touch to my friend, when in reality I don't even know how I would answer her if she ever asks me an explanation for our mouths being connected.

As soon as I lay her down in bed and lie down beside her, Areum curls up to my chest and starts to sob uncontrollably.

My heart begins racing, and her forlorn cries are making me feel miserable.
"Hey, bubba, Areum...what is it?" I try to look at her face, but she's holding tight onto my shirt with her little closed fists and crying her lungs out, letting out all her anger and other heavy emotions.

"I hate Maya...I don't like her, appa. I don't want her," Areum whimpers, her tears and wailing endless.

Hearing those words feels as if someone is stabbing my chest with an axe.

"Areum, appa is here for you. Please don't cry, bubba," I can feel my own tears welling up inside my eyes.

"I want eomma... I don't want Maya," she screams again, and I really don't know how to calm her down.

"Bubba, can you listen to appa? Just for a little while?" I rub her back comfortingly, helping her through her meltdown and hoping to have her ears open to me once she calms down.

She keeps wailing and pouring out hot tears for a while, and I do nothing but just hold her tight, my actions reassuring her that I will always be her safe place to express every emotion that she ever feels.

Eventually, she calms down and raises her head to look at me, her nose and eyes red from all the bawling.

"Are you okay now?" I ask her, softly moving aside the hair strands that are sticking to her forehead, coated in sweat and tears.

She shakes her head wordlessly, her chin quivering a little.

"Do you want some water?" I pick up the water bottle from the nightstand, extending it to her thereafter.

Areum sits up and takes a few sips of water and returns the bottle to the nightstand on her side of the bed and lays back down facing me.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yes," she confirms with a weak nod.

"Do you want to tell me why you don't like Maya?" I haven't had such a conversation before, and I don't know how exactly this will turn out to be.

"She's not my eomma"

"Did she say she's your eomma?"

"No," Areum's eyes lower to her hands that are holding on to the hem of the comforter covering us.

"Areum, no one can ever be your eomma. It's okay to miss her, and it's not your fault that we aren't together. But you do know that you can be with eomma whenever you wish to, right? No one can stop you from doing that," I keep caressing her head as I speak to her.

"But why do we have to be here, appa? Why did you leave me alone to go and talk to Maya? I want to go back to our home with eomma and you. I want bunny. I don't want this house," fresh tears begin sprouting in her eyes, and they spill out with each word she speaks shakily.

Hearing the fact that my daughter thought that I was only talking to Maya, and that she actually didn't see us kissing, feels like a whole boulder has been lifted off my chest.

"Areum, Maya will not hurt you," I take her hand in mine and rub the back of her hand in soft strokes.

"Appa....I want to go back home," she repeats and begins crying once again but much weaker than before.

I sit up too and rush to hold her in my arms.

"Baby, Areum," I bring her head to my chest and hold her close. "Even if we go back to our house now, eomma will not be there. You do know it, right? It will be just you and me," I speak, knowing fully well that she has crossed the point of reasoning, and her brain just won't take in any explanations right now.

All I'm hoping for is the night to end without Areum throwing up.

"Can we go for a drive?" I try my best to get her to calm down and fall asleep.

Addressing the problem and logical reasoning isn't going to work right now, and it is definitely going to be a long and hard journey which I absolutely do not intend to embark on tonight.

"Yes" Areum agrees immediately, mostly because she is extremely exhausted, just like me.

"Okay, that's my girl! Let's go," I help her out of the bed and fix her clothes a little before getting up from the bed myself.

"Are we going without brushing our hair?" She asks, wiping away her tears with the back of her other hand.

"Yeah, who minds that anyway? Come on," I softly pat her cheeks before I grab my phone from the nightstand and send a text message to Maya.

Me:
Taking Areum for a drive now

Me:
She has been crying

Maya:
I heard it Taehyung

Maya:
Just didn't want to barge into your space

Maya:
Take her for a drive, she might feel better

I'm typing out a reply as we walk past Maya's bedroom.

Me:
I hope so too

Maya:
Drive safe.

Powering off the screen, I put my phone inside the pocket of my trousers and collect the car keys and my wallet from the coffee table before we both wear our slippers and step outside, locking the front door behind us.

I help Areum get seated safely, and then I proceed to drive the car out onto the street. Turning on some of her favorite music, I drive slowly, my eyes constantly flitting between the road and the rear-view mirror where I see my daughter glancing at the road outside, her eyes already half-closed.

In a few more minutes, I notice that Areum has fallen asleep, her head lolling about. I drive around for a little more after turning the music into more calmer songs and then head over to Maya's house and park the car.

In a few seconds, Maya comes outside and jogs over to where my car is parked, and with a bit of help from her, I shift Areum to the guest bedroom upstairs, and Maya follows me.

"She didn't have her dinner," Maya says worriedly.

"She'll be okay," I answer wearily as I comb my hair with my fingers.

"And you?"

"I'll be good too. Sorry about the soup you made earlier," I apologize with a tired, lopsided smile as I turn my head to the side to look at her standing behind me.

"That's okay, you get some sleep too, Taehyung. You look so tired," Maya places both her hands on my shoulders and massages them with such tenderness that makes my whole body relax.

"I really think so too," I turn around fully to look at her, my hand slowly coming around to hold her jaw and softly stroke her cheek. "Please don't mind what Areum said and did today. I promise she's a nice chi-" Maya places a finger on my lips to silence me.

"I know she's an amazing child, but we made a mistake today. She's having a hard time, Taehyung, and we should be more careful," she takes my hand in hers and gives it a light squeeze, and her eyes are glinting with hope as she slowly slides her finger away from my lips.

Nodding in agreement, I pull her into a tight hug, and she comforts herself against my chest.

"I'm sure she'll wake up in a much better mood," I reassure her, kissing the top of her head.

Pulling away, she looks into my eyes and speaks softly,
"Sleep well. Let's hope that tomorrow will be a little better," she flicks under my chin with her index finger and sends a warm smile my way before turning off the lights in the room and stepping out, closing the door behind her.

I lie down beside Areum, feeling totally sucked out of all my energy. All of us are going to bed sad and hungry, and this isn't anything like what I pictured my life to be.

Yet, Areum is still just a very young child, and this is a diabolical change in her little world which will definitely take a lot of time and patience to handle and set right, and I only hope to get to better and happier days soon.

One step forward, two steps backward!
😭

Published on : 06/06/2022