My day started exactly the same way it did, nowadays at least. Since the notes and messages started, my days began the same way, with me peeling off my wide tired eyes off the ceiling and moving them to the clock pointing exactly at eight.

I further pull the blankets onto myself covering my head and forming a cocoon, a shield against me and the world. Closing my eyes, I try to get all the sleep in five minutes which I couldn't get throughout the night.

Before, I had never been this curious about the blank canvas which was my past. I always believed everything that I was told, thinking it was the truth because of how young I was and the sadness I used to feel, when I used to see my own mom ignore me even though I was in the hospital.

That's why, I was ready. To believe everything anyone who I could trust would tell me. I would paint the blank canvas with beautiful pictures of my mom and me, her smiling and me laughing, us in our old house near the blackfrost forest. To feel something else even just for a bit, to have something to replace this desperation with, I was ready to believe everything.

But now, I'm not sure about what is the truth and what isn't because there are so many canvases in my head now that I can't tell whether they are real or not.

That's why, I can't help but think about that note, about some promise I made and what it is. Simply said, I don't remember it and I don't know about it. It might have been from the period in my life which is now nothing but a dream or it could simply be a prank pulled by someone.

With a sigh, I kick my covers off me and get up feeling exhausted. I mean that's what happens when all you did throughout the night was turn side to side in hopes of falling asleep meanwhile sleep is busy playing hide and seek with you.

Dragging my feet across the soft plush carpeted floors, I made my way to the white door of the bathroom with a golden coloured knob. Entering inside, I turned on the tap, cupping water in my hands before I splashed it on my face.

Water droplets dripped from my face and down into the sink as my mud brown eyes, filled with exhaustion, stared back at me in the mirror, a sure sign of me just waking up, if the ash brown nest on my head made up entirely of my tangled hair wasn't one.

Splashing my face a few more times, I ran a hand through my hairs trying to untangle them as much as I could before giving up and going about my daily routine before heading downstairs dressed in my usual baggy jeans and an oversized t-shirt.

The dining room looked the same as it always did, spotlessly clean with everything in its rightful place. Pulling out a chair, I sat down on it, patiently awaiting for the food to arrive.

The tasty scent of the food hit me before I even saw it, making me sit up straighter. My dad entered the room with two plates in his hands laiden with yummy food.

His black -now turning grey at parts- hair were styled back as usual complementing his navy blue suit. He sets down our plates on the table before sitting down on the chair across from me.

"Good morning Dad." I said, in a monotone voice.

"Good morning Bearie!" he said, in his usual morning cheerfulness.

Humming, I picked up the fork and took a bite of the bacon, before chewing and taking another. My dad kept looking at me as if thinking something before he spoke.

"What's up with you? Didn't have a good night?" he asked, concerned.

"Mhm ... .Couldn't sleep yesterday." I replied, looking up to meet his worried eyes.

"Is something wrong? You know that you can tell me right?" He continued, his voice low.

"I know, I know, it's nothing serious so don't worry, if something comes up, I will tell you." I said, firmly, letting him now that I trust him.

But trusting doesn't mean someone doesn't mean that you will always tell them everything.

"Okay then." He said, nodding to himself before he started eating.

×××

Today the school was the same as ever, boring. I'm completely convinced that the whole reason schools are this way is because of someone's sick desire to torture us, the future of this country or more like the ending of it.

Because I don't think students like a certain black head sitting in front of me dressed in an overall with black pants and black bib with silver buttons on the top left and right corner, which was connected to the black straps on his light blue sweater.

He sketched calmly in his small notebook, occasionally looking up at the smoothie in front of him before going back to his notebook. He has been doing this for over an hour now and to simply say, my patience is running out.

"Felix?" I ask, irritation evident in my voice as I tapped on the table in a rhythm pattern I had found after half an hour.

"Hmm?" He hummed, without looking up.

"When is Nia going to be here?" I asked, running a hand through my open hair.

"I have no idea, why?" He asked, his fingers not stopping even for a moment as he continued sketching.

"Because we have been here for over an hour waiting for her! Is she even coming or not!?" I asked, slamming both of my hands on the table as I got up shouting.

"Woah, woah, calm down-" finally looking up at me, he put down his pen and notebook on the table and raised his hands up in surrender "-she should be here soon enough, but let me ask her again."

"Go ahead, I called her half an hour ago and she said she was just five minutes away." I said, sitting down again as I looked at him with annoyed eyes.

Quickly texting her, we both waited for her response meanwhile he sipped on his smoothie and I looked out of the window of the cafe. This time there were no kids playing on the street but the street was the same as it was before with people walking around while talking, eating or texting. Her response came soon, lighting up Felix's screen to show the notification.

"I'm sorry but it doesn't seem like I will be able to make it, sorry guys but have fun without me." He read out, in his usual husky voice.

"Agh!" I groaned, tired of how many times she has done this.

"Well, it seems it's just us if you aren't going to run away now." Felix said, with his usual smirk.

"Run." I huffed, crossing my hands against my chest. "As if."

"Guessed so." He murmured softly before picking up his pen and notebook and going back to his drawing.

I watched him for a while, as he calmly worked on his painting before a thought came into my head and I asked him.

"Do you like her?" I asked, as I propped my head up on my hands.

"Like who?" He asked, innocently.

"Don't play dumb with me." I said, sighing at his antics.

"But I don't know what you are talking about." He continued, tilting his head at the side as he batted his eyelashes innocently.

"I'm talking about Nia. Do you like her?" I asked, repeating my question with an explanation this time.

"I don't, you know. I'm not much of an emotional person." He calmly said, as he took a sip of his smoothie.

"I do, it's just that if you don't like her then don't break her heart as well." I replied, firmly. Letting him know I didn't want him to break her heart.

"I will try." He said, before going back to his sketch.

We sat there in each other's company talking here and there occasionally before we went home after an hour or two. He is a good friend no doubt, but sometimes, he is the hardest person to be around.

×××

The saddest part about everything is that it will eventually end, just like how this story will end and you will hate me, pity me or call me a fool.

But remember that before I didn't know what I know now, at that time, when there was still hope for me to live.....

Because if there was one thing that I wanted the most in life,

It was love....

And it eventually became the reason for the end of my story.....

And I don't know why I think about everything now.....

When death is so near....

X-X

1485 words....

Yahallooo!!!

What do you think about the last paragraph?? I'm so curious to know what you all think about it!!

Have a good day or night!!
~Mei