"Grammy, you do realize that you can't single out Lily with all of those gifts. She doesn't know that I'm her mother; I'm just a volunteer. She'll think something's up if you only give her the gifts," I told Grammy when she hauled in a very large bag of toys.

"It's all right. We can give some of the gifts to other kids, too, then," Grammy said.

"Ok, then. Let's go," I said.

We went outside. I had asked Danny if I could use his beat-up old Chevy to drive to Boston in. I still didn't trust Grandpa's old car in Grammy's garage. We loaded the presents in the backseat and then climbed in. I turned the radio on and put my sunglasses on. It was a sunny, but chilly Thanksgiving day.

"I'm so excited to finally meet her!" Grammy exclaimed giddily from the passenger seat.

"Remember to keep your cool, Grammy. I've kept my cover for nearly six years without letting on that I'm her mother. Please don't ruin it," I said.

"I still don't understand why you don't just adopt her. Hire a nanny to take care of her while you're at work," Grammy said. I shook my head.

"You don't understand the nature of my work, Grammy. I'm at work for more than 12 hours a day sometimes. There are some days where I don't get home until midnight," I said. "It wouldn't be fair to her. Money isn't the issue. I want her to have a mother that can love and care for her in the way she deserves. I can't do that for her right now; not until I'm an actual lawyer," I continued.

"What if someone else adopts her?" Grammy asked.

"Then it'll be for the best," I replied, my voice hollow. I wasn't going to let that happen; no one else was going to take my daughter from me. But was it cruel of me to keep her in the orphanage? She must have been so unhappy, feeling as if she had no real family, when both of her parents were alive and well.

I shook the thoughts out of my head. Those were thoughts that were for another time and place. Right now, I was just going for a visit.

We got to the adoption center in about three hours. Grammy looked up at the place disapprovingly as I pulled out the bag of toys.

"This place looks glum," she commented. I slammed the door of the car shut.

"It's actually really nice inside," I said, walking up to the door. Grammy came forward and pushed it open as I dragged the toys in behind me.

"Arya!" I heard the friendly voice of Rachel, the caretaker of the orphanage, as I stepped in. I let the bag of toys drop.

"Hey, Rachel," I said, smiling at her.

" I haven't seen you in ages! How are you?!" she exclaimed.

"I've been busy," I said. "This is my Grammy," I told her, indicating my grandmother, who was standing idly by, waiting to be introduced. Grammy stepped forward, grinning.

"My name's Martha, but everyone calls me Grammy," she said. Rachel laughed.

"Well, welcome to Athena Adoption Clinic, Grammy," Rachel said, smiling.

Rachel led us inside. All around us, the sounds of children laughing and playing could be heard. We walked past a room that was turned into a makeshift play-home, complete with a fake kitchen, mini living room, and even a small bedroom. There were mostly girls playing in here, but there were a few boys also, but they were mostly trying to annoy the girls. We continued walking and passed the sports room, which was filled with balls of all kinds and colors. We passed a staircase that led to the upper levels where all of the bedrooms were. Rachel led us to the office, which was currently filled with some of the staff members.

"Hello, ladies! Remember Arya?" Rachel announced when we walked in.

"Arya! Of course! How are you, dear? We haven't seen you in months!" Lana, a plump old woman, exclaimed.

"I'm fine. I've just been really busy. I had to go back to my home town to take care of my Grammy," I said, indicating my grandmother who was standing by. The ladies took this as a cue to squeal and introduce themselves to Grammy in turn. I moved off to the side to talk to Rachel.

"My grandmother was so excited to meet Lily that she bought the entire toy store," I told her. Rachel chuckled, looking at the bag of toys I still had clutched in my hands. "I was thinking we could give these to the kids and then give a few to Lily. Would that be all right?" I asked.

"Of course that would! That's so kind of you two. I'm sure the children will love the toys," Rachel said. I smiled at her and nodded, glancing around the room, slightly impatient. "She's doing just fine, you know," Rachel said, noting the expression on my face.

"That's good to hear," I said, forcing a smile.

"She misses you a lot," she said. I nodded, glancing down at my shoes.

"I wish I had more time to see her. But with Grammy sick now, I have to take care of her as well as do my job. It's a lot to do," I said.

"I understand," Rachel said sympathetically, patting my arm.

Grammy turned to face me after she met all of the staff members.

"Ready?" I asked. She nodded, her green eyes glittering in anticipation. I picked out a select few toys for Lily and handed the rest of the bag to Rachel to distribute to the other children. Then, Grammy and I went to search for Lily. It was finally time to introduce my grandmother to her great grandchild.

We found Lily sitting by herself in the music room. There were only a few other children in here. One girl was practicing playing the piano. A little boy was tapping at a plastic xylophone set. An older boy was strumming at a guitar. Lily was sitting by the window, a book propped open in front of her. I smiled, instantly proud at my daughter for choosing to read in her spare time. I looked at the cover and beamed further. She was reading The Cat in the Hat. A classic.

"Is that her?" Grammy whispered to me, spotting the young child whose hair was loosely tied in a braid resting on her shoulder. Her pale skin looked so like mine, her profile matching mine perfectly. She was beautiful.

"That's her," I replied, feeling my heart swell at the sight of my child.

Grammy and I walked up to her and she looked up. Her eyes didn't light up when she saw me. Instead, she marked her page, closed her book and stood up.

"Excuse me. I need to get through," she said in her innocent little five-year old voice.

I felt my jaw drop slightly and I exchanged a glance with my grandmother.

"Why?" I asked, stepping aside slightly as she pushed past me.

"Because I don't like being bothered when I'm reading," she answered, stomping to the door. Realization fell over me. She was angry with me.

"Oh, she's a fiesty one. She's exactly like you," Grammy said as we went after the temperamental child.

"Lily! Wait! Look, I've got toys for you! And I brought someone to meet you!" I said.

"Not interested!" Lily cried over her shoulder, making her way to the stairs. We followed suit.

"Lily, if you don't talk to me, then I'm going to start crying," I threatened. She turned around on her heel just as she reached the door and I for a brief second, I thought I had won her over. But this was my daughter we were talking about; she wasn't as easily forgiving as I had mistaken her to be.

"What about when I cried when you didn't talk to me for so long?" she asked. I bit my lip, feeling incredibly guilty. I really had hurt her feelings by staying away for so long. She had gotten so used to me and I had abused that.

"I'm really sorry, Lily. But if you'll just listen to me for a minute, I can explain to you why I've been away for so long," I said.

She frowned and crossed her little arms over her chest, scrutinizing me with the dark forest green eyes she had inherited from me.

"Fine," she agreed. I smiled, approaching her. "Let's go to my room," she suggested, yanking open the door to the stairs. We walked up the staircase, following the little five-year old.

We walked into her bedroom, which she shared with four other girls her age. It was a simple room, just like all of the others in the orphanage. There were five twin-sized beds; three pushed against one wall, two against the other. The bed covers were all the same faded, pale pink color. Next to each bed was a tiny nightstand. There were two windows at the end of the room, side-by-side. Under the two windows were two small desks. Hung up on the walls next to the beds were drawings that the girls had made or pictures that they had put up. Next to Lily's bed was a picture I had drawn with her when she was three. It was an attempted portrait of Lily and she had loved it so much that she hung it up. After almost three years, she still had it.

Lily led us into her bedroom, closing the door behind us. She jumped up onto her bed, setting her book down on top of a pile of other Dr. Seuss books. I read the titles of a few of them: Green Eggs and Ham, The Lorax, and One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish.

Grammy and I sat down on the bed across from her's. She stared at us, her eyes examining us carefully.

"So, are you going to tell me why you left me or not?" she asked finally. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"Well, I was gone for so long because I had to go back home to where I live and take care of my grandmother because she was sick." I explained. "This is her. This is Grammy," I added, putting my hand on Grammy's shoulder.

"Oh," was what Lily said.

"Come say hi to her. I told her so many stories about you and she was feeling better today so I brought her here to meet you," I said. Lily jumped off the bed and slowly inched closer to us. She had her finger in her mouth, something she did when she was nervous. "Don't be shy! She's really nice; I promise!" I said, smiling at her.

"Hi," she mumbled when she stood in front of Grammy. Grammy, unable to contain her happiness, put her arms around the child and embraced her tightly.

"Hello, my beautiful child! You are so perfect in every way!" Grammy exclaimed. I slapped a hand over my eyes, shaking my head. Subtlety was completely lost on my grandmother.

"Help. Me. I'm. Cho-king!" Lily cried. I pried Grammy's arms off of my child, sending her a glare.

"Keep your cool!" I hissed at her. She frowned and sat on her hands to control herself.

"So, do you forgive me?" I asked Lily. She tapped her finger on her chin, pretending to think.

"I'll have to think about," she said.

"Lilian!" I exclaimed, using her full name so she knew I was being serious. She grinned toothily at me, showing off a few missing teeth.

"Just kidding!" she said, coming forward and throwing her arms around me. I laughed and hugged her back, cradling my daughter as if she were really mine.

"Oh, I've missed you so much, you stinky little monkey," I told her, hugging her tight.

"I missed you, too, Arya," she said, squeezing me around the waist. I pulled her away and brushed her hair back out of her face.

"Grammy and I are here for the whole day today so you have a lot of time to tell me what's been going on in your life," I said.

"And look, we brought you toys!" Grammy said, pulling out the stuffed animals and Barbies she had bought for her. Lily grabbed the toys giddily, looking at each one with amazement and excitement. Her green eyes lit up, sparkling with the youthfulness that made her face glow.

Lily, as expected, quickly became friends with Grammy. The two of them immediately took a liking to each other. Grammy played with Lily in the same way that she had played with me when I was a little girl. She made the stuffed animals speak in funny voices. She made silly faces. She told interesting stories. She made up fun games. It was like I was watching a video from the past, except instead of me playing and laughing, it was Lily.

"How long are you staying for?" Lily asked me as we were playing Candyland, which was Lily's favorite board game.

"We have to leave in a few hours. It's a long drive back home," I replied.

"How much is a few hours?" she asked, looking up at me with wide green eyes. I glanced at Grammy. The potluck started at 6:00 pm. It took us three hours to get to Boston and would take three to get back, as well. Currently, it was 1:00 pm. We would have to leave in two hours in order to make it to the potluck.

"2 more hours," I told her.

"But that's so little!" she exclaimed.

"I know, kid. I wish we could stay longer," I said.

"Me too," she mumbled under her breath. I frowned and brushed back the hair from her face.

"Here, come here. Let me fix your hair," I said. She happily got up and sat in my folded lap.

"Arya is really good at hair," Lily told Grammy. Grammy laughed.

"Of course she is; I taught her everything she knows," she said.

I rolled my eyes at her and proceeded to frenchbraid my daughter's hair. I felt a smile creep up onto my lips. Every time I did Lily's hair for her, it reminded me of when my mother used to sit me down after I got ready for school and did intricate hairstyles that all the other girls in my class would rave about. I was glad that I could share the same moment with Lily, even if it was just once in a while.

"How's Ryan, Arya?" Lily asked me.

"He's fine. He won't admit it, but he liked meeting you that one time," I said.

"Ryan has met her and I haven't?" Grammy asked, her voice stern.

"We had a lot of work to do one weekend, so we just brought it all here to do it," I replied with a shrug.

"Do you know about Ryan?" Lily asked Grammy.

"I do," Grammy replied, nodding.

"I don't like him very much," Lily told her. Grammy chuckled.

"I haven't even met him and I don't like him," Grammy said.

"He's cute and all, but I don't think he's Arya's type. And I don't think Arya likes him too much, either," Lily continued.

"And how would you know that, Little Missy?" I asked her, finishing the final crossover and then securing her hair with her purple hairtie.

"Because I saw it in your face," she replied, turning around to face me.

I smiled gently down at her. It was good to know that my daughter could read me so well, even if we were so far apart from each other.

We heard a knock at the door and looked up. Rachel walked inside, smiling at us.

"Hello! I didn't meant to disturb you all, but we're all getting ready to eat lunch," Rachel said.

"Yay! Come on! It's a special Thanksgiving lunch!" Lily cried in excitement, hopping to her feet and grabbing mine and Grammy's hands, pulling us out the door.

The special Thanksgiving lunch turned out to be some vegetables, turkey sandwiches, chocolate chip cookies, and milk. It was special because of the chocolate chip cookies, which, to be honest, were pretty special. I saw Lily eyeing my cookie after she ate hers and since I was saving my appetite for the Thanksgiving feast tonight, I gave it to her. She threw her arms around me and hugged me tightly, grinning from ear to ear.

After we ate lunch, Lily introduced Grammy and me to some of her friends.

"This is Kelly; she's my best friend!" Lily told us, taking us to a little girl with blonde hair and bright blue eyes.

"Hi, Kelly!" I said, smiling at the young child. She looked shyly at me.

"Arya is a volunteer here. She's my favorite," Lily explained to Kelly. I felt my heart swell with pride. Grammy smiled at me, patting my arm.

Before we left, Lily took Grammy and me back up to her room. She wanted to pray, which is something the nuns that taught the children told them to do, and she wanted us to join in with her. We kneeled at the windows in her room, intertwining our fingers in front of us. Grammy glanced at me just before Lily told us to close our eyes.

"Dear God, I just wanted to say thanks for bringing Arya back here today. I was really missing her a lot and I'm glad she's here. I know I always ask this, but if You give me a mom, I hope she'll be like Arya because she's the nicest person I ever knew," Lily said.

I felt tears form under my closed eyes. In that moment, I wanted badly to hug Lily and tell her that I was indeed her mother and that I loved her very, very much. But I couldn't do it. There were too many uncertainties. Would she be happy to find out that I was her mom? Would she be angry with me for keeping it a secret for so long? Would she hate me for having put her in the adoption center in the first place? Would she ask me about her father?

I knew I couldn't answer any of those questions and so, with all my will fighting against me, I bit my tongue and remained silent.

Lily nudged me, silently telling me to make a prayer.

"Dear God, Please keep Lily safe and happy for the rest of her life. She's a great kid and deserves all of the happiness in the world," I said.

"Now it's your turn," Lily whispered to Grammy.

"Dear God, I pray that You make my family whole again before I die, so that I may rest peacefully in the next life," Grammy said. A fresh set of tears formed in my eyes because I knew Grammy wanted badly for me to tell Lily the truth. But I had to accept that truth for myself before I pushed it onto someone else, especially someone as innocent and perfect as Lily. I needed more time, although, I was finding as of late, that time wasn't exactly something that I had a lot of.

"Amen," Lily whispered.

"Amen," Grammy and I repeated.

I tried to wipe the tears from my eyes before Lily saw, but I was too slow. She looked up at me, a worried expression on her face, her green eyes wide open.

"What's wrong, Arya?" she asked. I looked at Grammy, who looked at me sympathetically.

"Nothing, kid. I'm fine," I said, forcing a smile. Arya threw her arms around me, hugging me tight.

"Please don't cry, Arya. I don't like it," she said. I laughed hollowly.

"Trust me, kid. Neither do I," I replied, hugging her back. I pulled her away and looked at her. "Look, Grammy and I have to leave now. But I'll see you soon, okay? Someone's sixth birthday is coming up and I want to celebrate it with you," I told her, poking her stomach. She giggled.

"Yay! Promise you won't leave me for a long time again?" Lily asked.

"I promise," I replied.

"Pinky swear," she said, sticking out her tiny finger. I looped my pinky around her and we linked them together tightly.

"Pinky swear," I repeated. Lily turned to Grammy.

"Make sure she doesn't stay away for too long," she told Grammy. Grammy laughed and nodded.

"I'll try, dear," she said. Lily grinned and hugged her. Then she hugged me and wouldn't let go until we got to the door to leave.

"Okay, kid. I've got to go now," I told her, trying to pry her little arms off from around my waist.

"Just a few more seconds," she said, her voice muffled from the fabric of my clothes. She gave me one last squeeze and then pulled away. "Bye, Arya!" she said.

"See you, kid," I said, pinching her cheek.

"Bye, Grammy!" she said to Grammy, hugging her.

"Good-bye, my dear," Grammy said, giving her a kiss on the top of her head. Grammy held onto her grandchild for a moment longer before letting her go. Rachel took Lily's hand so that she wouldn't run out after us.

"Bye, ladies! We hope to see you soon!" Rachel called out.

"Bye, Rachel! Thanks, again," I told her.

"Anytime," she replied, smiling at me.

Grammy and I walked outside and got into my car. I could see Rachel and Lily standing at the glass door of the center. Lily had her face pressed against the glass and was waving to us. I waved back as I put my car into drive. As we drove away, I glanced in the rearview mirror to take one last glance at my daughter before she disappeared out of sight.

________________________________________________________

A/N: I was going to put the potluck in this part, but I thought those festivities should be in a chapter of their own.

What do you think of Lily? I think she's a cutie.

Leave me a comment on your thoughts for the next chapter!

Remember to vote!

XOXO