Dear Journal ,

Tonight was magical.

Gotta love the day we told the British to go fuck themselves. (I may or may not have been drinking a little.)

We went to the beach with Carla and her children to watch the fireworks. May wore a cute red dress that made her look radiant, and I kept it chic and practical in a white tee shirt and denim jeans. The evening was perfect.

I spent time playing with Carla's kids, and they were a whirlwind of energy and joy. Watching them run around, their laughter echoing in the evening air, was a new experience for me. When I returned to the picnic spot, I was tired, but it was a good kind of tired. Carla and May had set up a lovely spread, and May snuggled up to me as we watched the fireworks.

May commented that I was good with kids, and I had to agree. I didn't realize how much I enjoyed their company until today. Holding May close, I felt a sense of contentment and possibility.

Children.

Terrible little monsters. I suppose I could see the appeal if they were ours. Many people talk about breaking the cycle yet nobody makes it a reality. Perhaps...just maybe...I could.

We could.

As the fireworks painted the night sky, I found myself imagining a future where I might experience this with my own children. I'd want to be the kind of father they deserved—present, loving, and engaged. The thought of having a family with May feels not just possible but wonderful. It's surprising how strongly I feel about it, and it fills me with a hopeful excitement.

Ive never once thought about having them. It always seemed like a foreign idea and given my unconventional upbringing, I never thought I'd be able to raise them properly. Looking at May...maybe we have a chance.

I could see myself as a father with her by my side. It'll be difficult for May to balance family and career but I'll be there to help her. I wonder what mother would think about if I told her she'll be a grandmother one day. (She'd probably ban me from the house before going on an impromptu shopping spree with May.)

Having a family with May isn't just a dream; it's something I genuinely want and look forward to.

I hope she feels the same way too.

Much to do,

Alexander.