Janet's POV

I always wondered what it felt like to be stabbed in the heart. The sharp blade penetrating the beating organ that pumps blood throughout our bodies. Of course, it'd be a quick and painful death if it did happen. But why did it feel as if I could feel the pain in this exact moment?

I sat in a large baby pink t-shirt. Hair tied up in a messy bun with my back against the carpet floor. I wallowed in my self-pity as I had no one to blame but myself. I let my inner demons win again even after I had thought they went away.

I pushed Erin away and I didn't even know why. Something inside me when I heard the rumors that he and Millie had been together on New Year's Eve. For some odd reason, it made my blood boil with rage. After all of the things, she did to us as kids.

I would never forgive her. And I hadn't expected him to forgive her either. Whether I believed them to be a couple or not the thought of it irked me to the very core. It wasn't like I had feelings for him, I would never see him that way.

But then why are you upset?

My inner demons taunted me yet again. Asking me the very questions I thought I had the answers to. I was upset that Erin would be with the person who bullied him and tormented him. He was allowing himself to be used by the likes of her!

As someone who has known him since we were kids. I was more so disappointed in him. That he would allow a bully to manipulate him just because he got hotter. It was ridiculous and very low of him.

Why'd you give back the necklace then?

Yet again my inner demon tripped me up. I had a solid reason why I was pissed. At least I believed I did that's what I liked to tell myself. That my reason was valid. I gave back the necklace simply because...because...because

It seemed like the logical thing to do! That reason was good enough for me and I would stick to it. I sighed gently as my eyes roamed around my room. It landed on a medium box that had been delivered a week ago. I knew it had to be from my "long lost family" but when Ms. Freckles asked I simply said, "it's from a friend".

I still hadn't had the guts to open the package. So far it sat unopened on my desk for about a week now. I licked my chapped lips and not so gracefully lifted myself off the ground. With rather shaky hands I grabbed the box off of the desk and sat on the bed.

I grabbed a pair of scissors then slowly began opening the box. I had no clue what to expect and so each breath I took was hard to do. I removed the light pink tissue paper and a small white card dropped out. It read:

Dear Janet,

Merry Christmas and a happy new year to you. I wasn't sure what you liked so I thought to give you something a bit more special. This blue sweater used to be your mother's. She would wear it all the time and it was very rare to see her without it. When we broke up she forgot it at my house and I've kept it ever since.

I put in a picture of her as well. I know it must have been hard to lose a mother so young. You look so much like her it brings me joy as your father. I hope to hear from you soon whenever that may be.

With love,
your father Hardin Velour

I sat the letter down before tearing more of the tissue paper. Unwrapping it a blue cardigan of thick material emerged. I held it in my hands ever so gently, tiny speckles of glitter adjourned the wool thick fabric. I rubbed it against my face, the thick material bringing me a sudden wave of warmth.

A small photo sat at the bottom of the box. I glanced at the woman in the picture, she had big brown eyes and unruly brown hair. Her pale skin seemed to glow as she smiled big. I compared our features and it was then I realized how similar we looked.

But while her face looked to be normal, not a birthmark insight. I gulped back the large lump in my throat. The woman in the picture was beautiful something that I could not relate to. She had given birth to a monster.

I slammed the cardigan back into the box and shoved it at the back of my closet. Light tears ran down my face as I angrily face planted in my bed once again. Sobs racked my body as I thought about not ever getting a chance to see the woman who gave me life.

I sobbed loudly at the fact that I was a disgrace of a daughter. I was a beast and I had to live with that fact every day. I closed my eyes and just as I was about to succumb to darkness the doorbell rang loudly.

I groaned getting up to answer the door. I opened the door to see a very pissed off, Amy. " We need to talk," she said before pushing her way inside.