My name is Spring Kay Campbell and I am a Christian and a Masturbator. I'm sorry for all the wrongs I've done. That is why I'm going to kill myself. I'll probably be dead by the time that you read this letter, but this is a suicide note...so yeah.

I have decided to kill myself a giant better judgment because life us too hard to live. The sin and burden are too heavy for me to carry with me for the rest of my life. I'm sorry God, please forgive me.

Before I die, I want to tell you something. There us a time to weep and a time to cry. Life doesn't stop changing until you kick the bucket. I hope that my tears with make you laugh for that is the least I can do.

Goodbye sinful world,
Spring K. Campbell

*[this is not real]