a form of self-harm

the oath

Adelaide sat in a circle with the rest of the losers. she was out of the hospital now, and she felt a bit better, just quite often got headaches. "I can only remember parts," Beverly started to explain.

"Sounds like Addie," Richie joked, which got a slap from Adelaide. "What? It's true?"

Beverly ignored his nonsense. "But I thought I was dead. That's what it felt like. I saw us... all of us together back here," she explained. "We were older, like our parents' ages."

"Am I still handsome as an adult?" Richie joked, getting a laugh from them all.

"You grow into your looks," Beverly told him.

Richie laughed before shaking his head. "What the fuck does that mean?"

"What about me?" Stanley asked.

Beverly's smile faltered for a moment like she knew something. "Like now, but taller," she said quietly.

Adelaide smiled. "I know we don't have much, none of really," she said softly, "but we do have each other. And that had to count for something."

Eddie nodded. "Of course, that'll never change."

"W-what were we all doing here?" Bill asked, Adelaide, glanced at him and then back at Beverly.

She shook her head. "I just remember how we felt... We were scared we were..." she said before sighing. "I don't think I can ever forget that."

Bill suddenly stood up, grabbing something off the ground they all looked at him. "Swear it," he told them. "S-swear if it isn't dead, if it ever comes back, we'll come back too."

Beverly was the first to stand up with Bill, and then Adelaide followed them. Then the rest of them were all standing.

Bill started by cutting a slit into the palm of his hand. Then Richie, Eddie, Mike, Stanley, Ben, and finally Beverly.

Lastly, Bill stood in front of Adelaide, she stuck her hand out, watching him as he carefully cut her hand open. She didn't even flinch, she just stood there, staring at him as he did it. Next thing she knew she had a hold of Bill and Richie's hands, as they stood in silence for a moment, they all linked hands, then let go.

"I gotta go," Stanley said finally. "I hate you." Then he grinned, a small laugh escaping a few of the losers. Eddie hugged Richie before leaving next. The losers slowly left until finally, it was just Adelaide and Bill left. Beverly had just left.

Adelaide looked over at Bill. "How're you doing?" She asked quietly. "About Georgie?"

He sighed and looked down. "I'll manage..." he mumbled softly. "How do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Cope, with a s-siblings death," he said quietly. "Ever since G-G-Georgie went missing... I feel like everything just... you k-know. I wanna get over it."

"You never, really get over to Bill," she said. "It'll always hurt. And asking me about how to cope, when I don't even know to..."

"You s-seem to know."

"I cope in all the wrong ways," she said and looked at him, taking his hand softly. "It'll never go away, and you'll never forget about Georgie just like I will never forget about Christine. It'll always hurt, but you'll learn how to manage that pain, that's something I'm currently figuring out."

Bill suddenly hugged her, and she hugged him back. She felt bad for him, that he had to go through the pain of losing a sibling. Bill didn't deserve it, he was a good person, deep down.

Bill pulled back and stared at her, she felt her stomach twist and turn. She hoped more than ever that what Richie said at the hospital was true, about Bill liking her.

He kissed her.

And she kissed him back.

Her hand rose to his cheek, which was still bleeding. They only kissed for a few seconds, but it was finally a peaceful few seconds.

—

2 years later

Adelaide smiled at Bill as the losers gathered around in a small restaurant. The two had been dating basically since they defeated Pennywise. All the losers were inseparable now. They started high school now, and everything for Adelaide was better now.

She had been clear for a little over a year now, her brother became her legal guardian and everything was absolutely perfect.

Bill leaned back after taking a sip of his soda. "I actually h-have to talk to you g-guys about something," he said, playing with the straw to his cup.

Adelaide had a grip on Bill's hand and Richie was on the other side of her, she and Richie were just arguing and kicking each other as Bill said this.

They stopped. "What's up?" Richie asked.

Adelaide glanced at him, she had no clue what he was gonna say. "My p-p-parents are moving to Colorado..." he said quietly.

Adelaide shook her head. "What?" She questioned. "Colorado... but that's."

"F-far away," he stuttered and nodded. "I know."

Eddie sighed. "Like actually, no jokes?"

Bill nodded. "No j-jokes." He mumbled.

"Fuck," Adelaide cursed to herself.

"When are you moving?" Ben asked. "Surely you're finishing the school year here, right?"

Bill shook his head. "Next m-month," he told them. "We're already p-packing."

Beverly looked at Adelaide and smiled at her, it was a pitiful smile. Her boyfriend was moving miles away, what else did she expect?

"Why?" Stanley asked.

Bill shrugged. "They haven't b-been the same since G-Georgie... I think that's why," he explained.

Mike nodded and sighed. "One of us has to stay in Derry after we graduate... in case he does come back," Mike told them. "We have to remember our promise."

Richie looked at him. "Bad time, man," he said. "Pennywise is over. It's not happening again."

"We really don't know that," Beverly pointed out. "Just in case Bill, remember our promise."

"Of course..."

"We'll right to you, you better promise to write back," Adelaide said, nudging him softly.

Bill promised to write as often as he could, but that would never happen. Bill would forget about them, his friends, and his girlfriend pretty quickly after he left. Wouldn't be long before Adelaide and Richie lost their friendship and then after that, all the losers fell apart.

There was no losers club without Bill Denbrough.

A/N:
last chapter of act 1! i really hope you enjoyed this i enjoyed writing it for sure. see you next time.