Authors Note

Hi Everyone!

Chapter two is here and I hope you enjoy it!

If you do like it then feel free to leave a comment, and if you're feeling super nice a vote! If you don't like it then still feel free to leave a comment and tell me what I can improve on.

This chapter is dedicated to @Meredith_Violett for being so kind and inspirational:)

A quiet knock at my door indicated my mum had left my dinner outside my room. This small routine my parents had adapted so they wouldn't have to face the wrath of my grief also indicated that they had become afraid of their own daughter.

It was true; Grace was the key that held my family together. When she was around her kindness radiated and peace was restored. Now she was gone, the ice had thickened the walls and we were succumbing to it once again.

I didn't feel like eating, in all fairness I didn't feel like anything. I felt numb. I was watching my whole life unravel before my eyes and all I could do is stare blankly.

It hit me in that moment that I had felt so much and now I felt nothing.

Standing from the bed I finally acknowledged my surroundings fully. My room, which I shared many nights with Grace, looked exactly as it was. The white walls still hung the photos we had captured throughout the 10 years of our friendship. We would no longer capture anymore. No. Not we. I would no longer capture anymore.

The shattered glass of the picture I had flung in anger lay still. Mocking me in my despair. I took the steps towards the frame slowly; trying to deny the fact my whole body was shut down.

It was only then I noticed the envelope.

That wasn't there before; I knew it had fallen from the frame. Steadying my shaking hands I retrieved the letter from the glass.

To Soph.

It was written in black ink. The kind of ink that came from a fountain pen. Something only a calligrapher would use. And the handwriting I had received many birthday cards and secret notes from stuck out in my brain like fire. This was a message from Grace. A note.

Of course it was from Grace. She had given me the photo as a gift, all framed and perfectly wrapped, for Christmas. She had planned this, her suicide wasn't a spontaneous decision, it was an intricate mission.  The letter S was now smudged and I realized my own tears were the culprits. A sound that indicated a laugh strung my ears, it had come from my mouth. This was such a Grace thing to do. Speak to me beyond the grave. Dead girl talking was definitely her forte.

I stared at the note, I knew without certainty whatever lay on the pages hidden within would crack the remaining pieces of my heart. I debated opening it. The only reason Grace would ever leave me was if her life was completely empty, and her life would never be empty, she had me. I tried to rack my brain to the last time Grace had cried, she rarely cried, that was why this past week was so unexpected. Grace was known for her happiness. If people were colours, Grace would be yellow. I would be grey.

"I love him Soph, I really really love him. But I think I hate him as well" Grace cried into my arms, Dean was a touchy subject for many weeks and it was only now she indicated any heartbreak of the sour breakup she had endured.

" You broke it off, Dean would take you back without a second thought", I was as confused as the other 30 people who attended Ashbourne High School, Grace and Dean were the golden couple, completely and utterly smitten with each other. The kind of love the rest of us would only hope to find.

"If you truly love him then call him"

"I can't, he isn't the same person I fell in love with, he's changed" Her reply was cryptic, she knew it would invite me in, make me want more. I would always try to unhook myself, yet every time I took the bait.

"What does that even mean, Dean hasn't changed, he's been the same idiot since he could walk" I pushed her too tell me.

"We all commit sins Soph, some of us worse than others"

"Ok, but where do sins fit in with Dean, the only sin he commits is never handing in his homework and I'm sure God will forgive him for that." Looking back on it I was sly to try to enlighten a situation that needed handling with care, but Grace annoyed me when she spoke in code that she knew I could never translate.

"He loved me. That was his sin. Love is overrated." She replied into my now numb leg.

"But don't you think it's worth it?"

"No, not if it destroys who you are"

If I could turn back to last August I would of pressed her, got her to tell me more. Maybe if I did then something would be different. I wouldn't be sat on my bed with sleeping pills on my bedside table. Grace would be here, and we would be catching up on the latest episode of Riverdale or talking about the cute new boy who had just moved in down the street.

I wouldn't be holding her last words in my hands. But it isn't different, I can't go back and find out what Grace hid from me, what secrets she stored from the eager eyes of Ashbourne.

So with a heavy heart and a ruptered soul, I broke the seal.