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6. I Smell The Blood of an Englishman


Luminous walked into the cave, she was generally surprised to find the inside looking more like a small house with its navy blue carpeted floor, a couch that sat off to the side, and the small bed in the back corner. The lantern lights shined across some bookshelves and books that were splayed across the floor.

"Hey! Who are you and what are you doing here!?" Yelled a boy's voice.

Luminous looked up to see someone staring down at her from a wooden balcony in a dark blue trench coat, with a blue snowflake pattern face mask and goggles covering his face. He was standing next to what looked like a makeshift chemistry lab.

"What are you dumb or something?" Asked the boy. "I asked. You.A. Question!" He said with each step down the stairs.

He stood right in front of Luminous as if he were bigger than her, but his face only came up to her chest. She stared down at the top of his wavey snowy looking hair. It looked so soft and fluffy it was almost tempting to touch.

"Answer me, girl!" Yelled the little boy getting impatient.

"Oh ya, uh. You must be an apprentice right? So..d.. do you happen to know where the wizard Vainglorious is?" Stuttered Luminous.

"Make it quick what do you want and what do you have to offer me in return?" Asked the little boy crossing his arms. "My time is valuable."

"You? Huh?"

"Oh for folklore...I'm the powerful wizard Vainglorious!" Yelled the little boy.

"Yo..You're the powerful wizard Vainglorious?!" Sputtered Luminous."But you're like 9 years old!"

"I'm 12!" Vainglorious yelled back. "I just haven't hit my growth spurt yet is all...besides what's your excuse, you're obviously a kid with how short you are and how babyish your face is, but your boobs are way too big you tavern wench!"

"Huh?...What?!"

"Hahaha! He's got you there short stuff."Laughed the Dawn of Fate.

Vainglorious jumped hearing the masculine gruff voice come out of nowhere. He looked around the cave but saw that no one else was with them.

"He does not, my boobs are of normal size.D cup is normal." Replied Luminous. "I'm perfectly normal."

"Pfff sure you are." Scoffed the Dawn of Fate.

Vainglorious looked closer at the huge sword strapped to the girls' back.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Asked Luminous.

"Let me ask you something then," Said the Dawn of Fate. "what about you do you think is normal short stuff?"

Luminous paused a moment shifting her eyes around the room as if looking for the answer.

"Is your sword talking?" Asked Vainglorious.

"Huh? Am I what?" Asked Luminous.

"Who's asking?" Retorted the Dawn of Fate.

"Wow, that's incredible." Said Vainglorious. Moving behind Luminous to get a better look at the Dawn of Fate. "How did you enchant the sword to talk?"

"Oh, I didn't." Said Luminous.

"Oh.." Said Vainglorious, the excitement in his voice immediately dying down. "Well then, what do you want? Let's get this over with."

"Well, I got this sword because I need it to help me save my friends. And. I mean, there was a ball that night, and I was going to ask Chasm. Because the red prince encouraged me to."

"The red prince?" Asked Vainglorious, raising his eyebrow.

"Ya, the red prince has always been there for me for as long as I can remember." Said Luminous. "He was there for me when Maybell pushed me into the duck pond. He also comes and sneaks me a cookie behind Brenda bots back wherever I'm grounded. He also got me out of that tree that one time..."

Vainglorious looked Luminous up and down as she rambled on. He noticed that she was wearing a cotton pink button pajama shirt with a chicken pattern on it, with short black shorts, she wasn't even wearing shoes, just dirty white socks.

Oh, folklore, someone at the tavern must-have screwed her screws loose. Thought Vainglorious. She actually thinks she knows the prince of the red kingdom.

"And what does your "dear friend the prince" have anything to do with me?" Asked Vainglorious.

"Well, you see the red prince and Cham got kidnaped by the crow king." Said Luminous. "And Master Mouse said you're the only one..."

"Master Mouse!" Interrupted Vainglorious. "You're with the magic counsel! I told you before that no I won't join you! I have a right to my powers and to use them freely how I want! So no I won't be doing things for the magic counsel! And you can especially tell Master Mouse to shove it!"

"But Vainglorious! I need to get my friends back! You're the only one who can...!"

"How many times do I have to say no!" Yelled Vainglorious. An array of ice shot out towards Luminous' face.

"Ahh!" Luminous jumped back typing over a little backpack.

A map and some of its other contents spilled out of it as Luminous hit the carpeted ground.

"Luminous!" Barrett burst into the cave. Only to see Luminous laying on the floor cowering surrounded by sharp pointy ice. Vainglorious towering over her. "Vainglorious you bastard!"

Vainglorious turned around to see the muscular hunter charging towards him with his greatsword drawn.

"Too much heartbreak so you put up a wall, not even summer will make the ice thaw!"

Vainglorious summoned a thick ice shield in front of himself. Barrett's greatsword clashed with it.

"You brought Barrett with you!?" Yelled Vainglorious. "Why?! Are you stupid or something!?"

"Actually, bringing me along was smart." Retorted Barrett. "People know you're dangerous and attack people you don't agree with, you little gremlin!"

"Seriously! You're going to play Mr. protector here?" Scoffed Vainglorious. "I know you're only doing this because you want a reason to attack me for not using my powers to suit your needs!"

"Why?! Why won't you use your powers to heal my grandmother! She was nothing but nice to you! Letting you into our own home whenever you wanted!" Barrett bashed Vainglorious' shield with his sword. Tears brimming his eyes. "You know she still gives me little lunch boxes to give to you and she always asks me how you've been and if I've seen you! So why!? You of all people know that if she dies I'll have no one!" Screamed Barrett slashing into Vainglorious' shield harder as tears ran down his cheeks.

"See that's the thing!" Vainglorious shouts back. "There my powers I can use them how I want! Then you threatened to report me to the magic console so you can control me! You're selfish!"

"I'm selfish!?" Yelled Barrett his sword finally breaking the shield. Ice scattered around the room leaving Vainglorious open. "Who refuses to help an old lady who takes in selfish little runaways boys!"

"The graceful look of her Beauty at first glance, but her glare will prick you if you dare ask her to dance!" Chated Vainglorious.

"Barrett look out!" Shouted Luminous seeing icicles spring from the cave floor towards Barrett.

Barrett jumped back. The ice scraped his jeans, tearing them a little as it cut his skin.

"Get out! Get out get out get out!" Yelled Vainglorious the icicles chasing after Barrett.

Luminous' eyes widened when she saw the icicles coming towards her. Barrett grabbed Luminous' hand pulling her up, running out of the cave with her.

"And stay out!" Yelled Vainglorious.

Icicles filled the entrance. Making it look like the cave had sharp pointy teeth.

"Well, that went in the worst way possible." Laughed the Dawn of Fate.

"What are we supposed to do now?" Asked Luminous.

"What do you mean, do now?" Asked Barrett. "We get out."

"But I can't just leave." Said Luminous. "Master Mouse said. I mean, it was his last words before..." Luminous bit her lip her words trailing off.

"And you're going to do what short stuff?" Asked the Dawn of Fate. "Keep going back, risking your life until he ice blasts you to death or you somehow wear him down?"

"I..." Luminous twittered her figures.

"I wouldn't worry too much about Vainglorious anyways." Scoffed Barrett. "I got a good look at that map on the ground next to you and saw his plans to go to Fe-Fi-Fo's cave."

"Fe-Fi-Fo?" Asked Luminous.

"A giant who has been living down in the canyon around here lately. Man, I know Vainglorious has strong magic, but messing with a giant is something else. He might actually die if he gets caught."

"He'll die?!"

"What do you care for? He doesn't want your help. Nor does he want to help you." Said the Dawn of Fate.

"But if he gets caught he will..."

Luminous looked towards Barrett. The tall muscular teen scowled crossing his arms.

"You do what you want. I only said I would help you track him, not chase him to his death." Said Barrett turning around and walking away. "You can come back with me or you can stay here."

"But Barrett. I also need your help.Please." Said Luminous.

"Do you know what I asked Vainglorious when my grandmother first started taking him in from the woods two years ago Luminous?" Asked Barrett, stopping in his tracks. "I told him that my parents left me with my grandmother because they didn't want me. Then I asked him if it was okay if he wanted to tell me what happened to his parents." Barrett grimaced balling his hands in a fist. "He told me that it's not that his parents didn't want him, it's that he didn't want his parents. I asked him what he meant by that. He said he could go back to his house anytime he wanted instead of hanging around my small hobble."

The air was still for a moment, not a red leaf dare fall to the ground.

"He has everything he could ever want. But he turns his nose up at everything." Said Barrett his heavy boot crushing a red leaf underneath as he passed. "I hate him."

Luminous sat behind a tree in front of Vainglorious cave waiting and waiting, and waiting...

"So are we just going to sit out here all night waiting for the little ice queen to come out of her castle?" Asked the Dawn of Fate.

"You heard Barrett if he attempts to steal from that giant and gets caught, then he'll die."

"Again, short stuff why do you care? He doesn't want your help. Nor does he want to help us."

"But Master Mouse said..."

"Master Mouse is obviously wrong. Look Short stuff, I know you're going through something hard because he is gone. But sometimes, and I know this is hard to believe since, he is old, but sometimes he's wrong."

"But the library, he was always just there. It won't feel the same." Said Luminous. "Nothings going to feel the same."

"I know." Said the Dawn of Fate.

There was a moment of silence. Nothing but the wind blowing the red leaves from the tree.

"Hey, the ice is gone from the cave." Said the Dawn of Fate.

"Huh?"

Luminous looked over from behind the tree to see the cave mouth standing wide open. Seeing her opportunity Luminous cautiously went into the cave. Peeping her head in Luminous called out.

"Hello!" Not seeing the boy from earlier she walked inside. "Vainglorious? Vainglorious, I just want to talk to you. Please I know you're planning to do something dangerous!"

Luminous looked around the cave but no one was inside anywhere. And what's more the little backpack she tripped over earlier was gone. It was too late Vainglorious was already gone.

"Impossible!" Wined Luminous. "How did he even get outside without me noticing? I've been standing at the tree watching this cave for hours!"

"Are you kidding me?" Laughed the Dawn of Fate. "You kept getting distracted by every little thing around the forest. You suck at being a lookout."

"Come on, that's not funny. Where did he even go?"

In Luminous panic, she accidentally kicked over a crate of maps. The maps fell sprawled out on the floor.

"Why do these all look familiar?" Asked Luminous looking at all the maps.

"Umm, genius one, ever look at a map before?" Asked the Dawn of Fate. "These are maps of all the six kingdoms."

"Oh." Luminous blushed. "Barrett said Vainglorious was going to steal from a giant named Fe-Fi-Fo in a canyon or something right?" Luminous stared hard at the maps. "But where would that be...?"

"Oh gee, I don't know, how about the map of kingdom brown with a picture of a canyon on it?" Asked the Dawn of Fate.

"Ya, I saw that." Blushed Luminous picking up the map that said kingdom brown on it. "Alright let's go save our wizard!"

Luminous began to step out of the cave holding the map in her tiny hand. When she felt a strong force tug her arm, the map flew out of her hand, the crate it was in stood back upright all the maps that were on the ground including the one in her hand flew back into the crate resuming the position they had before she accidentally kicked them over.

"What!?" Asked Luminous in shock.

"Oh that was clever," said the Dawn of Fate. "I was wondering how he kept all his stuff from being raided."

"What just happened?" Asked Luminous.

"Gee, sheltered much? He put up a protection rune around the cave. Normally people wouldn't be able to get in, but since you had good intentions it let you in. It still won't let you take anything out, or trash the place though."

"But then how am I supposed to find my way to the canyon?"

"Memorize it?"

"Uhh..." Luminous scratch her chin, almost peeling her bandage off.

"Oh folklore, were doomed aren't we?" Sighed the Dawn of Fate.

"Not necessarily..." Said Luminous, walking into the cave again and digging the kingdom brown map out of the crate. "I can do it."

Luminous stared at the map, then she put her hands over her eyes for a bit trying to memorize it. When she was sure she got the map right she opened her eyes, but it wasn't like it was in her head.

"I uhh.." Luminous started.

"You can't do it can you?" Asked the Dawn of Fate.

"I can too!" Luminous crossed her arms looking to the side. That's when she noticed a quill and some ink sitting on a table. "I can too..."

Luminous got up grabbing the quill and ink from the table sat down next to the map. Then she unstrapped the Dawn of Fate from her back, setting him down on the blue carpet. If she couldn't take the map out of the cave she was going to make one herself.

"What are you doing short stuff?" Asked the Dawn of Fate.

Luminous than unbuttoned her shirt.

"Whoa! Shortstuff! What are you doing!?" Yelled the Dawn of Fate.

Luminous lay the shirt down on the carpet below the map. The inside of the shirt was a pale white. Taking the quill and dipping it in ink Luminous began copying the map on her shirt.

"Oh, that's actually really clever!" Said the Dawn of Fate. "Assuming the ink won't reset when you step out of the cave."

Luminous stopped drawing on the shirt for a second, grimacing.

"Please don't say that, my wrist already hurts from copying this down."

After Luminous was done she held up her shirt looking over her handy work.

"Well, time for the moment of truth." Said the Dawn of Fate as Luminous strapped him back to her back.

Taking a deep breath Luminous stood at the entrance of the cave clutching her shirt to her chest. She stepped outside of the cave. Slowly opening her blue eyes she looked down at the shirt to see if the ink was still there.

"Holly mice mites and milk curds! It actually worked!" Yelled the Dawn of Fate.

"Yes!" Luminous punched her fist in the air smiling. "Let's go save our wizard."

Luminous took the Dawn of Fate and ran in the forest scraping by trees and leaves, using her shirt as a map to guide herself through the forest.

"Look I'm glad you're at least wearing a bra short stuff, but can you memorize that map just a little bit so you can put your shirt back on in case we run into any predators?" Asked the Dawn of Fate.

"Predators? You mean the corrupt?" Asked Luminous without stopping.

"No, I mean like handsy men..."

"There it is!"

Luminous stood over the cliff's edge looking down into the canyon. The orangy-red glow of the campfire shined on a huge tent made of beanstalks, along with a huge boulder that sat right next to the campfire.

"That's great short stuff." Said the Dawn of Fate. "Can you put your shirt back on now?"

"Oh, ya..."

Luminous took the Dawn of Fate off her back and put her arms back into the short sleeves. She went to button the top button when she spotted a small figure running across the bottom of the canyon towards the tent made of beanstalks.

"Vainglorious?"

Luminous' hands stopped playing with the button. She grabbed the sword strap and ran down the canyon.

"Wait! Wait short stuff!" Said the Dawn of Fate. "Button up your shirt first! Oww!"

Luminous slipped on the rocks sliding the rest of the way down.

"Do you always have to drag me around on the ground?" Asked the Dawn of Fate when they got to the bottom.

"We have to get to that weird tent." Said Luminous.

She was so distracted with getting to Vainglorious that she didn't notice that the boulder sitting next to the campfire opened its eye.

Luminous ran into the tent when she saw Vainglorious with some sort of potion he held behind the back of his navy blue trench coat. He kept his focus on the beanstalk that slither around like a snake preparing to strike.

"Vainglorious there you are!" Yelled Luminous.

The young wizard turned around startled at the mention of his name. The beanstalk quickly wrapped around Vainglorious' skinny waist, the potion he was holding shattered to the dirt ground as he was harshly plucked off the ground.

"The sweat of the hard GAH!"

Vainglorious attempted a spell, but as soon as he opened his mouth the beanstalk plunged into him. Just as quickly the other beanstalks climbed into his nostrils and ears, then climbed up inside his navy blue pants leg.

Luminous stared in horror as the young boy choked and gagged on the plant.

"What's it doing to him?!"

"It's a special extermination plant. It's routing through all his orifices to try to get to his heart and pull it out." Explained the Dawn of Fate. "The only way to defeat all thoughts stalks is to find the original one and cut it down."

Luminous thought about what would be the fastest way to find the original stalk. When the idea struck her.

"Oh, short stack you're not thinking about..."

"Blade Sacralization!" She shouted.

The Dawn of Fates vermilion blade expanded five times bigger than it already was. Luminous held the sword in the air grunting as her tiny arms burned under the heavyweight.

"You can hardly control this power!" Scolded the Dawn of Fate.

"I don't need perfect control, I only need one perfect hit!" Grunted Luminous leaning forward.

The huge blade fell slicing through all the beanstalks right next to Vainglorious. The young boy fell to the ground as the blade went back to its normal size. Vainglorious bent over his snow-white skin flushed as he coughed up beanstalks.

"*Coff coff!* Are you crazy!? *Coff coff!* That blade was near my head, you could have killed me!" Wheezed Vainglorious his wide gray eyes watering.

"Still a better death than being suffocated to death, or get your heart pulled out though where the sun doesn't shine." Said the Dawn of Fate. "So uh, your welcome."

"Are you okay?" Asked Luminous, reaching her hand out to Vainglorious.

Vainglorious wiped the drool from his lips looking up at Luminous. His face went from its cold white color to a shade of red when he noticed that her shirt was unbuttoned leaving her exposed in nothing but a white bra.

"L..Lecher!" Blushed Vainglorious smacking her hand away. "Don't you dare come...!"

"Ho ho, I am here I came, walking in like a hurricane!" Boomed a loud voice.

The ground shook as the voice got closer and closer.

"Giant incoming!" Said the Dawn of Fate.

Luminous quickly grabbed Vainglorious' hand pulling him up and running inside the ginormous cobblestone oven. She pressed herself and Vainglorious up against the side of the cooker away from the light peering inside the widow slits carved into the oven door.

"Step in my way and feel the pain, nothing to it just like to maine. Oh ho ho." Fe Fi Fo laughed.

Vainglorious could feel his heart beating and not just because the giant was getting closer. But because of the position they ended up in, his face was only an inch away from the tiny bow that sat in the center of Luminous' bra. How embracing....

"Hey what's wrong Vainglorious?" Asked Luminous. Vainglorious' pink face snapped up to meet her baby blue eyes. "Your face is all red, are you sick?"

"Why you...!"

"Shut up you two," Whisper shouted the Dawn of Fate.

"A pair of boots stuck in my teeth, along with a women's wedding wreath!" Sing shouted the giant bursting into the beanstalk tent.

Curious, Luminous peaked out of the little bars of the stove door at the giant. Her blue eyes widening as she saw the rocky lumpy face of the being.

"*Gasp*! It's the bolder that was by the campfire!"

"Shhh, be quiet." Scolded the Dawn of Fate.

"Drinking till I hit the sink, I don't care what anyone thi......." Fe Fi Fo paused in front of the cobblestone stove where they were all hiding. "Something smells off..."

The giant lifted up his huge mammoth bone club above his head as his stubby tooth smile spread from cheek to cheek.

"Did you really think you could sneak past me, little one?"

Luminous, Vainglorious, and the Dawn of Fate all held their breath as they waited for impact. There was a huge ear-splitting crash as the wind blew dust and debris around the tent. The huge wooden table the giant kept his cobblestone pot on was splitter into unrecognizable pieces.

"Very prospective nose, it's almost as good as mine." Laughed a recognizable voice.

Luminous opened her eyes to see Barrett holding his greatsword in front of himself, standing tall in front of the giant, his red hood blowing in the dust and wind.

"You broke into my tent." Said Fe Fi Fo. "No human dares come here. You've got a death wish or something tinny?" Laughed the Giant

Barrett looked around the tent, he never in a million years thought he would challenge a giant in his territory. He came here looking for Luminous. But it seemed like wherever she was if she were here the giant didn't notice her. That made Barrett happy that she was at least safe.

"Tch! I came here because facing off with a giant didn't seem like that big of a deal." Barrett lied. "You all seem like a bunch of pansy pickers to me."

"How dare you!" Screamed Fe Fi Fo. "You're really going to get it now tiny!"

Fe Fi Fo lifted his club up to strike. Barrett took his stance getting ready to doge when Luminous ran out of the stove.

"Barrett!" Yelled Luminous running towards the well-built hunter.

Vainglorious frozen in shock, the stove door standing wide open leaving him completely in view. Barrett turned towards Luminous to see her running towards him.

"Luminous?!" Barrett's rosewood eyes widened.

"Oh ho ho. You brought more little weaklings with you too?" Laughed Fe Fi Fo, his stomach giggling with laughter.

Fe Fi Fo turned towards Vainglorious who stayed frozen with shock. His big gray eyes looked up as the giant reached for him. Vainglorious pointed his wand at the giant and yelled out.

"Bittersweet is the feeling of an Icicle spear, When you get the feeling of death but without any fear!" An ice spear shot out of his wand towards the giant's face.

"Ahh!" The giant shouted putting a hand over his iced-out eye.

Vainglorious took the opportunity and ran for the entrance of the tent.

"Oh no, you buggers don't!" Yelled the giant swinging around his club.

Luminous reached out for Barrett when the club blew up dirt and dust everywhere. Barrett stuck his greatsword into the ground to anchor himself to the spot. He tried to reach for her hand but Luminous got blown away by the force. Vainglorious who was running lifted off the ground. Both Vainglorious and Luminous smashed into each other falling back down.

When the dust finally stopped Luminous groggily looked around for Barrett but he wasn't anywhere to be seen anymore.

"Barrett!" Yelled Luminous cupping her hands to her mouth.

Vainglorious grabbed her hand, putting a finger over his mouth.

"Folklore, your head is thick.." Said Vainglorious, putting his hand to his aching forehead. "Do you want to get caught? We need to get out of here as quietly as..."

That's when Vainglorious spotted the harp he had come here for high up on a beanstalk vine, as well as an opening in the stalks that served as a window that could be his way out.

"...is what I would say, but I really need something and it's dire." Said Vainglorious. "Please help me out miss umm..."

"Luminous."

"Luminous, you said you would do anything to help out your friends right?" Asked Vainglorious looking at Luminous pleadingly.

"Yes, I will. I'll do anything to get the prince and Chasm back," said Luminous

She thought back to the last time she saw chasm that night through the looking glass. He was fighting off those corrupted wolves to defend the red prince. He was so brave, his raven black hair that was usually all neat in a short ponytail was messy and everywhere, his fair porcelain skin scratched up and dripping with sweat. She could never forget those dark blue eyes that were narrowed with cold determination, not an ounce of fear in them.

Now was her turn to be brave for him and find him as well as the red prince no matter what it took.

"What do you need me to do?"

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