At school, the career fair was going on in the lounge.

Willow walked into the hall from outside and looked around at some of the displays being set up on her way to sign up for the career aptitude test.

Buffy, Xander and I were already sitting at a table filling out our tests.

Xander read. "'Are you a people person, or do you prefer keeping your own company?' Well, what if I'm a people person who keeps his own company by default?"

Willow walked for our table with a test to join us.

"So, mark 'none of the above'," Buffy told him.

"Well, there are no boxes for 'none of the above'," I told her. "That would introduce too many variables into their mushroom head, number-crunching little world."

Willow sat down. "I'm sensing bitterness."

"No, it's just these people can't tell from one multiple-choice test what we're gonna be doing for the rest of our lives," I told them. "It's ridiculous."

Willow smiled. "I'm kinda curious to find out what sort of career I could have."

"What, and suck all the spontaneity out of being young and stupid?" I asked. "I'd rather live in the dark."

"You're not gonna be young forever," Willow told me.

"Yes, but I'll always be stupid," I told them, smirking. "Okay, let's not all rush to disagree."

Buffy looked up at me seriously. "You're not stupid."

I gave her an acknowledging sarcastic grin, then looked up when I heard Cordelia.

Cordelia had a clipboard, and was taking her test as she walked into the lounge accompanied by two of her groupies. "'I aspire to help my fellow man.'" She marked her test. "Check. As long as he's not smelly, dirty or something gross."

Cordelia walked by our table.

"Cordelia Chase, always ready to give a helping hand to the rich and the pretty," Xander told her.

"Which, lucky me, excludes you," Cordelia replied. "Twice."

Xander had no comeback, so Cordelia just walked away followed closely by her cronies.

"Is murder always a crime?" Xander asked.

"Do I like shrubs?" Buffy asked.

"That's between you and your god," Xander told her.

Buffy looked at Willow and me. "What'd you guys put?"

"I came down on the side of shrubs," Willow answered.

"Go with shrubs," I said. "Okay."

Buffy was frustrated. "Uhhh! I shouldn't even be bothering with this. It's all mootville for me. No matter what my aptitude test says, we already know my deal."

"Yup, high risk, sub-minimum wage..." Xander trailed off.

"Pointy wooden things..." Buffy added, holding her pencil like a stake.

"Then why are you even taking the test?" I asked.

"It's Principal Snyder's hoop of the week," Buffy answered. "He's not happy unless I'm jumping. Believe me, I would not be here otherwise."

"You're not even a teensy weensy bit curious about what kinda career you could've had?" Willow asked. "I mean, if you weren't already the Slayer and all."

"Do the words 'sealed in fate' ring any bells for you, Will?" Buffy asked. "Why go there?"

"You know, with that kind of attitude you could've had a bright future as an employee at the DMV," Xander told her, shaking his pencil at her.

"I'm sorry, it's just..." Buffy trailed off. "Unless Hell freezes over and every vamp in Sunnydale puts in for early retirement, I'd say my future is pretty much a non-issue."

~~

The next day, Willow, Buffy and I walked out and started across the quad.

"You and Angel are going skating?" I asked. "Alone?"

"Unless some unforeseen evil pops up," Buffy answered. "But I'm in full 'see no evil' mode."

"Angel ice-skating," I said.

"I know," Buffy said. "Two worlds collide."

Xander met up with us. "Wouldn't you three say you know me about as well as anyone else? Maybe even better than I know myself?"

"What's this about?" Willow asked.

)When you look at me, do you think 'prison guard'?" Xander asked.

Willow, Buffy and I laughed.

"Um, crossing guard, maybe, but prison guard?" I asked, shaking my head.

"They just put up the assignments for the career fair, and according to my test results I can look forward to being gainfully employed in the growing field of corrections," Xander told us.

Buffy giggled. "Well, at least you'll be on the right side of the bars."

"Ha, ha, ha, ha!" Xander said sarcastically. "Laugh now, missy, they assigned you to the booth for law enforcement professionals."

Buffy was stunned. "As in police?"

"As in polyester, doughnuts and brutality," Xander answered.

Buffy whined.

Willow smiled. "But doughnuts."

Buffy whined louder. "Well, I'll just jump off that bridge when I come to it." She spotted Giles walking along with a tall stack of old books in his arms. "First I have to deal with Giles. He's on this Tony Robbins hyper-efficiency kick. Expects me to check in every day after homeroom." She walked off after Giles. "Police?"

Xander started to follow, but I held holds him back. "You didn't check to see which seminar I was assigned to, did you?"

"I did, and we're looking at a future personal trainor," Xander told me.  "Or maybe a future musician."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah, okay."

"Laugh now, but when I get old and fat, or if I need cheap entertainment, you're the girl I'm gonna come to," Xander told me.

I hit him playfully.

"What about me?" Willow asked.

"You weren't," Xander told her.

"I wasn't what?" Willow asked.

"On the list," Xander answered.

"But I handed in my test,"Willow told us. "I used a number two pencil."

"Then I guess you must've passed," Xander told her.

"It's not the kinda test you pass or fail," I told him.

"Your name wasn't up there, Will," Xander told her.

Willow was a bit taken aback.

~~

The career fair in the school lounge was going on.

Xander and I walked into the hall at the far end and spotted Willow.

"Willow!" I said. We walked. "What are you doing here? Fly! Be free, little bird, you defy category."

"I'm looking for Buffy," Willow told us.

"Oh, she went with Giles about an hour ago," Xander told her. "Some kind of field trip deal."

"If she doesn't get back soon, Snyder's really..." Willow trailed off, spotting Snyder on the stairs. "...done a great job with the fair this year, hasn't he, guys?"

"Principal Snyder," Xander said. "Great career fair, sir. Really. In fact, I'm so inspired by your leadership, I'm thinking principal school. I wanna walk in your shoes. Not your actual shoes, of course, because you're a tiny person. Not tiny in the small sense, of course. Okay, I'm done now."

"Where is she?" Snyder asked.

"Who?" I asked.

"You know who," Snyder told me.

"You mean Buffy?" I asked, looking around. "I just saw her--"

"And don't feed me that 'I just saw her a minute ago, she's around here somewhere' story," Snyder cut me off.

"But I did... just see her a minute ago, and she is here somewhere," I told him.

"For what it's worth--" Xander started.

"It's worth nothing, Harris," Snyder cut him off. "Whatever comes out of your mouth is a meaningless waste of breath. An airborne toxic event."

"Well, I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to be so honest with me," Xander told him. "And I can only hope that one day I'm in the position to be that honest with you."

"Fascinating," Snyder said, walking away.

Xander looked at Willow and me. "Well, love to stay and chat, but I got an appointment with the warden on standard riot procedure. Ciao."

Xander walked away.

I looked at Willow. "Personal trainer or musician?"

"Can you go with both?" Willow asked. I sighed, my hand going to my head, walking away. "Okay, see you."

~~

In the library, Willow, Buffy, Xander and I were sitting at the table.

"So Giles is sure that the vampire who stole his book is connected to the one you slayed last night?" Willow asked. "Or is it slew?"

Giles walked out of the stacks with a National Geographic magazine. "Both are correct, and, yes, I'm sure. Du Lac was both a, a... a theologian and a mathematician." He walked down the stairs. "This article describes an invention of his, which he called 'The Du Lac Cross'."

"So, why go to all the trouble of inventing something, and then giving it a weak name like that?" Xander asked. "I mean, I'da gone with 'The Cross-o-matic', or, uh, 'The Amazing Mr. Cross'."

Willow, Buffy and I looked at him.

Xander looked up at Giles and nodded.

Giles didn't think his musings are funny either. "The cross was more than a mere symbol." He handed the open magazine to Willow. "It was used to understand certain mystical texts, to, uh, decipher hidden meanings and so forth."

"So you're saying these vampires went to all this hassle for your basic decoder ring?" I asked.

Giles was taken aback by the metaphor. "Uh, actually, yes, I, I suppose I am."

"According to this, Du Lac destroyed every cross except the one buried with him," Willow told us.

"Why destroy your own work?" Buffy asked.

Giles paced. "Perhaps he feared what might happen if it fell into the wrong hands."

"A fear we'll soon get to experience for ourselves up close and personal," Xander told us.

"U-unless we can preempt their plans," Giles told us.

"How?" I asked.

"Uh, by learning what's in the book before they do," Giles answered. "Which means we can expect to be here later tonight."

Giles sat down.

Willow smiled widely. "Goody. Research party."

"Will, you need a life in the worst way," I told her.

Buffy stood. "Speaking of, I really have to bail, but I promise I'll be back bright and early tomorrow and ready to slay."

"This is a matter of some urgency, Buffy," Giles told her.

"I realize that," Buffy told him. "Well, you have to admit, I kinda lack in the book area. I mean, you guys are the brains, I'd only be here for moral support anyway."

"That's untrue, Buffy, you totally contribute," Xander told her. "You go for snacks."

Buffy looked to Willow and me for help.

Her date with Angel was tonight.

"She should go," I told them. "You know, gather her strength."

"Perhaps you're right," Giles told us. "There may be fierce battles ahead."

Buffy made tracks for the door.

"But Ho-Hos are a vital part of my cognitive process," Xander told us.

Buffy smiled. "Sorry, Xand. Someplace I have to be."

Buffy turned and left.

Giles and Xander gave each other a look.

Willow and I exchanged a smile.

~~

Buffy and Angel had been attacked,at the ice rink. Buffy had to cut his head off using her ice skates. He had been wearing a ring.

Giles inspected the ring under a magnifying lamp.

Buffy was sitting on the steps holding an icepack to her knee.

Willow, Xander and I were sitting at the table.

"This guy was hard-core, Giles," Buffy told him. "And Angel was power-freaked by that ring."

"I'm afraid he was not overreacting," Giles told her. "This ring is worn only by members of the Order of Taraka. It's a society of deadly assassins dating back to King Solomon."

Giles sat down.

"Assassins?" Xander repeated. "What's the problem? We send in the Killer of men in Zodom, Assassin of Zonia." I gave him a look.  "And didn't they beat the Elks this year in the Sunnydale adult bowling league championships?"

"Their credo is to sow discord and kill the unwary," Giles told us.

"Bowling is a vicious game," Xander told us.

Giles was very annoyed. "That's enough, Xander!" Xander looked down in shame. Buffy, Willow and I were concerned and upset. "Sorry. It's just not the time for jokes. I need to think."

Giles took off his glasses.

"These assassins, why are they after me?" Buffy asked.

"'Cause you're the scourge of the underworld?" I suggested.

"I haven't been that scourgey lately," Buffy told us.

Giles rubbed his eyes. "I don't know, I don't know." He exhaled. "I think the best thing we can do is to find a secure location. Somewhere out of the way you can go until we decide on the best course of action."

Buffy stood. "Okay, now you and Angel have both said to head for the hills. Are you saying I can't handle this, that I'm not strong enough to fight these people?"

"They're a breed apart, Buffy," Giles told her. "U-unlike vampires they have no earthly desires. But to collect their bounty. They find a target, and, uh... they eliminate it." Buffy absorbed this solemnly. "You can kill as many of them as you like, it won't make any difference. Where there's one, there will be another, and another. They won't stop coming until the job is done. Each one of them works alone. His own way. Some are human, some... a-are not. Y-you won't know who they are until they strike."

~~

Giles walked out of his office cleaning his glasses.

Willow was sitting at the counter going through a volume. "I wish there was more we could do."

"We're doing all that we can," Giles told us, putting on his glasses. "The only course of action is to try and find out what was in that stolen book." He read a card from the catalog. He looked up at me. "But Xander may be right about one thing."

"Zoey the assassin against the human assassins coming after Buffy?" I asked. "Neato."

"Now, are you sure you can still fight the way you had on Halloween?" Giles asked.

I pulled a machete out of the arsenal in the cage, tossing up multiple tennis balls, slicing through the air quickly.

All of the tennis balls fell to the floor, sliced in half.

Giles and Willow were impressed.

"I might not have the strength I had that night, but the movements, it's like it's hardwired in my brain," I told them. "Like it had actually been me."

Xander walked in, applauding. "Assassin of Zonia, at your service." I put the machete away. "Buffy didn't go home. I let the phone ring a few hundred times before I remembered her mom is out of town."

"Well, maybe Buffy unplugged the phone," Giles told us.

"No, it's a statistical impossibility for a sixteen-year-old girl to unplug her phone," Xander told him.

Willow nodded in agreement.

"Well, perhaps my words of caution were... a little too alarming," Giles told us.

"You think?" I asked, heavy with sarcasm.

"It's good that she took you seriously, Giles," Willow told him. "I just wish we knew where she was."

~~

Willow and I had fallen asleep.

I hadn't even noticed until Giles woke us up.

"Willow?" Giles asked. "Zoey?"

I woke up calmly.

Willow woke with a start and sat bolt upright. "Don't warn the tadpoles!"

"Are you all right?" Giles asked.

"Giles, what are you doing here?" I asked.

"It's the library, Zoey," Giles told me. "You both fell asleep."

I looked around. "Oh! I..."

Giles looked at Willow. "Don't warn the tadpoles?"

"Willow has frog fear," I explained.

"Oh," Giles said.

"I'm sorry," Willow told him. "We conked out."

"What?" Giles asked. "Please. You've both gone quite beyond the call of duty." He sat down. "But, but, I-I... uh, fortunately, I think I may have found something finally."

"You did?" Willow asked.

"I-I found a-a description of the missing Du Lac manuscript," Giles told us. "It's a ritua. Now, I-I, uh..." He stood up to pace. "I haven't managed to decipher the exact details, but I-I... I believe the purpose is to restore a weak and sick vampire back to full health."

"A vampire like Drusilla?" I asked.

Giles nodded. "Exactly."

So Spike was trying to get his weak, sick, mental vampire girlfriend Drusilla back to full health who could feed and kill as she liked.