Song: Natural by Imagine Dragons (Savannah Outen –cover)

I'm not sure how long I sat there on the floor leaning against the wall across from him. His lifeless body lays in a pool of blood on the bed. His eyes still wide open.  I'm zoned out into another part of my mind, in the far back where I am afraid if I stay too long that I might not be able to make it back out. For hours all I see is red and then somewhere in all of it I feel like I am that little girl scared to death, scared that he is coming after me like he did my family. I keep telling myself that he is gone because I know Scarlett and Mekhi made sure that he would never hurt me so why, why am I feeling like I am back there and this is all a nightmare.

Did I just do the one thing that I thought I would never do? I mean sure I have seen a dead body, several times. And I have seen a life taken right in front of me but I have never been the one to actually do it. The whole room engulfs me and all I see is red and then black, darkness soon consumes me. I'm startled when I feel someone touching me, more less shaking me to see if I am alive. I slowly open my eyes to see them squatting down in front of me.

"Violet...Violet...we are here now. Violet come on wake up."

I start to tear up and my whole body is shaking. "I did it! I killed him; I'm a just like him a killer. How...how could I have done something like that. I..."

My dad leans over and picks me up. "Everything is going to be all right we will take care of everything." He carries me to the bathroom and my mom is already turning on the shower. He sits me down on the toilet and was about to help me out of my clothes until my mom looks up at him.

"I got this, please go help the guys." Once he leaves she starts to help me undress. She looks at my cast and back up at me. "What the hell happened? Violet when did this happen?" Her eyes narrow and I watch her whole expression change before my eyes.

I start crying all over again.

"He did this to you? Well thank god you killed him or one of us would be doing it right now." She stands up and looks down at me. "I will be right back; we will need to cover the cast with plastic before you can get in." In seconds she is back and wrapping it up. Then she helps me up into the shower to wash off all the blood. "Let me know if you need help ok."

I stand in the shower trembling even if the water is hot enough to keep me nice and warm. I start to scrub my body and watch as all the blood slowly washes away and goes down the drain in a red swirl. I wash my hair and then grab the towel to dry off. She is still sitting there in the bathroom waiting for me. I don't have to ask her to help me out of the shower she just automatically  stands up and does it. Then she helps me sit down on the toilet seat. She helps me get dressed and then brushes out my hair.

It feels like so many years ago that she did this one simple task and I feel so emotional that more tears come to surface. Scarlett leans over and wipes the few stray tears away. "Everything is going to be just fine. You will see." She then wraps her arms around me and holds me there for a few minutes.

I don't ask questions as we are leaving the apartment. I don't look back at the bedroom where he was not so long ago. I'm sure they have their way of cleaning everything up and no one will ever know what really happened in that moment of time.

The plane ride home was quite and when we did finally arrive home, Atticus picks me up in his arms and carries me to my bedroom. They all come in to kiss me goodnight and then my mom turns off the light to let me rest. They say we will talk about this tomorrow when I am well rested. When I finally wake up, my body feels so sore. I feel like I could really use another pain killer. I look around the room and realize that I am back home in my old bedroom.

Oh shit! It was all real, they came and got me. Shit, Gabe. I suddenly remember what happened. I sit up and look around the room for my crutches. I wasn't surprised at all to see them leaning against the chair by the bed. I grab them and stand up to make my way down the steps, however as I stand there looking down the stairs it looks so much more difficult than I thought. I hate asking for help. I would rather die than ask but sometimes you just have to do it.

So I call out in hopes that he will hear me. "Atticus are you down there...hello...HELLO!!! ATTICUS!" I end up screaming his name.

However to my surprise my dad comes over and looks up the staircase. "Sweetheart, Atticus is in the workout room with your mom. Can I help out in anyway?"

I gesture at my leg. "Uhm...yes...actually can you help me get down there." I point to the bottom floor.

Of course he comes rushing up and instead of just helping me down he picks me up in his arms. Once down on the bottom floor he helps me into standing. He lets go when he sees that I got my balance and can walk the rest of the way. As we are walking to the kitchen he makes the comment about the cast. "Looks like we need to get that off as soon as possible to replace it; I will call the doctor to come over to have a look at it. Can I ask what the hell happened?"

I want to tell him, I do but at the moment I feel that if I start talking I will break down in tears again. I hate crying in front of him; I don't want to show that I am weak. When I get closer to the table, he pulls out the chair for me. I sit down and look down at the table. He walks of and grabs a glass and then pours me some juice. "Cranberry right?"

"Yes, thank you."

"And I'm sure my girl is starving, how about some pancakes just the way you like it."

I smile back at him while trying to fight back the tears. I watch him take out everything and whip up the pancakes like it is nothing. The whole time he doesn't say a word but I know it's coming the moment he places the plate before me. I have everything in arms reach, pancakes, syrup, napkin, fork and the glass of juice. I feel like a little girl when I am around him but I know that I am not that little girl anymore.

He pulls up a chair and sits down beside me. "Go on eat up now; it will make you feel better."

"You always have tried to make things better. Thanks for the pancakes." I start to eat. I take the side of the fork to cut a small piece to pop in my mouth.

When I get the last bite down he touches my hand and looks up at me. "Now tell me what really happened."

My eyes start to burn as I fight back the tears. "I don't know where to start."

"How about from the beginning," she says behind me. I turn to see my mom coming into the room. She just had her morning workout session with Atticus and Marcus. I wonder why my dad was not in the session but I don't bother to ask. She comes over and sits across from me. I'm not surprised that the rest of the crew comes into the kitchen to sit with us. They are all sitting at the table and all ears are on me. They all want to know what really happened and I owe it to all of them because each one of them helped me in disposing of his body.

"I wanted to pretend that we had the perfect relationship. All our friends that our relationship was the best ever but not you guys. You knew the moment you laid eyes on him that he was not good for me. You questioned it, especially you, mom. You called him out and it pissed him off."

She was about to interject but I hold out my hand for her to stop. "Don't worry this had nothing to do with you. You see I had planned on coming home for a while after the play ended and we got into an argument. I was giving it my all and he...he thought otherwise saying that I was slacking and basically I was ruining our chances of our future." My eyes swell with tears. I can fill my chin start to quiver.

I take a deep breath, "On the final move he landed on my ankle and I went down. Can you believe it, cracked it in two areas and a fine line break. Daveport took me straight to the emergency room and I was told I would need to have surgery on it. I didn't call you guys because I wanted to take care of this myself. I know how you guys are; each one of you would have loved to make him pay."

"Hell yeah we would have," growls Atticus.

I look up at him and try to smile but instead it goes flat. I wipe my cheek and then my nose. "I came home and he was not there and by the time he did show up something inside of me was screaming for him to just leave. He fucking ruined my dance career all because he was afraid that I was going to leave him for good and he didn't want me to go. He said that he would never let me leave and we got into an argument. I was trying to get him off of me. I grabbed the closest thing near me and it happened to be scissors. I...I...don't know what came over me all I know is that I was stabbing him and I just kept doing it till he was no longer fighting with me, till he was no longer breathing."

My dad tightens his hand over mine. "You did what you had to do. I promise you, you will be ok."

"Will I? All I think about is seeing him laying there lifeless by my hands." I pull away from him and hold my hands up. "I did it; I'm a cold blooded killer. I took his life like it meant absolutely nothing. How do you guys do it? How do you take a life and go about your life like nothing ever happened?"