Song: Lennon Stella- Older than I am

It was another two weeks before I went back to her house and knocked on the door. I would have a few other times before but there was a strange car in the drive way and I had a feeling she had already told William about me. I can't let him see me, not just yet.  It's just that if everyone knows then the story will completely leak out and the world will know the whole truth. They will find out about what really happened. If that wasn't bad enough my family now might get into a lot of trouble for keeping me all those years. Could it be considered kidnapping or would they see it as someonejust caring for another? There was no way that I was going to find out. I never had felt taken away. The family that took me in loved me. They cherished me and gave me the world and there was nothing I was going to do to jeopardize that relationship.

As I walk up the steps, I survey the area just to make sure that I am not being watched.  I notice a few neighbors close by but nothing unusual is going on and the car that has been here is no where in site.  I take notice of the flowers that line the sidewalk and when I look up its like I can see my brothers jumping over them just enough so they don't touch them.  As I stand on the front porch, I blink and get the memory out of my head before I knock on the door. When the door open up her face lights up when she sees me staring back at her. "My sweet Child...please come in. I thought you left me for good. It'sjust been so long. " She acts like she wants to wrap her arms around me but she folds her arms up in front of her instead as she drums her fingers against her arm.

"I came by a few times but someone was here." I stop and look again behind me to make sure no one is out spying on me. I just had this weird feeling that someone would sneak up on me and trap me here.

"Yes...William has been coming by lately." She attempts a smile and  I can tell by the look in her eyes that she has been talking about me.

I let out a lung full of air in frustration, "You told him about me. I asked you not to. I never should have come here." I turn to walk away but she reaches out to me and grabs my arm.

"Please don't go. Please come in and join me for tea." She motions for me to come in.

I stand in the door way debating on what to do. I turn back around to look at the neighborhood and it is calm as ever, nothing going on. I turn back around to look at her again. "OK, I guess I can stay for a few minutes but then I will need to go ok."

She steps to the side and I walk in. She disappears into the kitchen to fix me a cup of hot tea and today she has made homemade shortbread cookies.  She walks back into the room with everything on a silver platter. "I use to make these for my boys when they were little."

I take one and as soon as I bite a piece into my mouth something jogs my memory around. "You use to make these for us." My mouth waters up with the sweet goodness in my mouth. 

"You remembered." Her face lights up.

I nod my head. How could I ever forget that? She always had cookies with a glass of milk waiting on us every time we came to visit which was pretty often. As I look over at the table, I envision the four of us grabbing cookies and my brothers always seemed to fight over the same one. I can hear her in the background saying, 'boys there are plenty to go around.'

We sit and talk for a good fifteen minutes. She talks mostly about my dad and what he was like as a kid. There were so many happy memories of him that she recalled. I loved hearing about him. I did but something in the back of my mind kept making me wonder more about my mom. I wish I could remember everything about her. If it wasn't for seeing her in the photos that my grandmother had kept, I don't think I could even recall what she looked like. I slowly turn to my grandmother. "Can I ask you something?" She nods her head. "Do you happen to know about my mom's family? Like what was her last name or do they happen to live around here?"

"Oh dear...Uhm...well...she was an Owens." I watch as she taps her finger against her lips as she is trying to recall something out of her memory. "Her parents...I believe moved to Louisiana years ago."

"Louisiana...wow. So Owens...you don't happen to know their names do you?" The more information I can get from her the better. 

"Well of course I do. They were searching for you and your family for years. During those first few years they spent a lot of time over here. We just couldn't get over how a whole family just disappears like that. Hold on a minute." She gets up and walks back over the shelf with the all the albums and comes back over. This time the book holds Newspaper articles, flyers, printed documents and pictures. "This was an article right after you all disappeared." She points at a picture.

I pick it up and there is an older couple standing beside each other. The headline read... 'Prayers for the Green and Owen families, search still continues..." I skim the article and sure enough there are their names in print, Earl and Mary Owens. I take out my phone and snap a picture of the article. I was going to hand her back the album but I itched to know more. I turn to look at the next page and the next. There were so many articles and pictures of my family. Pictures of what we looked like and what we might look like five, ten, fifteen years later. My fingers slowly touched faces, trying to remember what they all look like. Over the years my mind has changed the way I thought they looked. It's crazy really how your mind does that. How is it possible to remember only certain images of your life? I can't get over how many articles there are, years and years piled up. They never gave up looking. When I got to the end, I slowly closed the book and hand it back to her. "Thank you for showing me that."

"Dear it was my pleasure. I told William because I thought I have been imagining things and he still doesn't believe me. He says that I am getting old and my mind in playing tricks on me. I never, ever wanted to believe that they were just gone."

I look down at the time. I have already been here for almost an hour and  I try not to stay long because I don't want someone like William showing up while I am here. I don't want to cause trouble for anyone. "I should be going. I have to get to work." I lie as I stand up and start to walk towards the door.

"Violet...here," she says with a soft voice. I turn and she is handing me a family picture. "I'm sure you don't have one and every time you are here you seem to like this one."

"I can't take your picture."

"Nonsense...I have hundreds and I think you need this more than I do."

I take the picture from her and then embrace her. "I love you gammy...I have never forgotten about you."

"Violet...it is you, isn't it? I am not losing it am I?" She pulls away from me as both her hands form around my cheeks. "My little Violet has come back to me."

When she lets go of me, I stare back into her eyes. I can see all the years of sadness left behind. It was like seeing me in that moment gave her what she needed to heal. Even though I know she will never be fully healed of the loss of her son but seeing me gave him some kind of closure in her life. I wanted to stay longer however I hug her one more time before saying goodbye. I leave the house taking the photo with me.