"D...Dev" her voice choked as I slowly caressed her face.

"Shh... I am here... nothing is wrong babydoll...." I said but she shook her heads in defeat. She wasn't listening to anything I was saying. Her lips quivered as she stared at me helplessly.

"Did you chase me out of this house?"

------------------

Dev's POV

The moment those words left her lips, I felt like the whole world beneath me had slipped. I waited, wide eyed, heart in my mouth, hoping for her to change the subject. But her eyes were scanning my face for answers. She looked angry and upset at the same time. I gulped and sighed. I had to do this...

"Huh....what?" I asked as my gaze fell onto the ground and my eyes blurred. I glanced back up at Sona and asked, "What are you saying?" my voice sounded more pained than anything. Because I exactly knew what she was asking about and I had no answers to give her.

"Nisha told me that you were the one who chased me out of the house.............and" she sniffled as my eyes turned red.

"And...?"

"and ............ I met with that accident!" she clenched her eyes shut and started crying.

That bitch...

I never expected the conversation to be this intense. Now the hatred I held for Nisha increased ten folds. But that wasn't my concern. The crying image of Sonakshi was too hard to see. I could never get used to the feeling of seeing her cry. It was just so painful and there was no way I could find to solve this problem. Of course, I could tell her the truth. But would she be able to handle it?

If it was the old Sonakshi, I knew that she would definitely be able to handle hard truths because she was a strong woman. She faced her worst fears with a brave heart. Situations made her strong and hard. But the Sonakshi now I had, was literally a baby. I mean it... She was indeed a child. She wouldn't be able to handle the truth and she might break down even more..... which would cause a greater impact on her health.

I can never risk her health this time...

"Dev........please say something! Did you really chase me out of the house? Do you love her? Please don't lie....... Promise upon me" she sniffled as my jaws dropped.

Love her? Seriously?

"Sonakshi......... What are you talking? Of course, I didn't chase you out... And I never loved anyone except you. Please stop taking her words so seriously! Do you know that she is a mental??? Come on Sonakshi." I said pulling her into my chest but she kept struggling out of my hold.

Of course, this time I wasn't lying. I didn't chase her out of my house. It was me who left the house. So, it wasn't an entire lie.

She suddenly stopped fighting and snuggled closer to my chest, wiping her tears like a baby. I just can't help but feel amused at how she is angry with me one moment and the next moment, she blinks her eyes repeatedly and act like the most innocent creature in the world.

"Please........ Just enlighten me what happened so that I won't have to believe what others tell me. I really can't take it. It's difficult Dev." she spoke against my chest as I cradled her trembling face.

"Okay..... I will tell you. Just not now. Because the doctor has advised you to take plenty of rest. You look like you will faint again." I whispered as her hold on me tightened.

"You won't leave me right?" she whispered as my heart sunk. Oh god, please give make her remember everything already. I can't take it anymore. I just can't see her suffering anymore.

"Why would I leave you?" I asked as she slowly moved up and buried her face in the crook of my neck.

"Nisha told me........that .....that..........you...... stayed with her together.......in Australia......and-"

"I love you Sonakshi." I cut her and pulled her so that she could face me. Nisha had surely sealed her death when she tried to brainwash Sonakshi.

"Do you think whatever she said is true?" I asked her softly while she blinked like a child.

"No..."

"Ok, let me tell you something. I don't want to lie to you. I did stay with her for three years in Australia. But she was my close cousin then. We shared a friendly bond and she helped me in developing my company. That's all. I still came back for you and I am with you now, right?" I asked as she nodded. Her confusion was still not clear but I can't risk on telling her any more things....yet.

"I love you a lot Sonakshi. I won't lie and tell you that our marriage was a bed of roses. It wasn't. We faced lots of hurdles in our relationship and I did let you down a few times. I did certain mistakes and I really feel bad about it. Your accident...... your accident changed me. As a person and as a husband, I realised my mistakes and responsibilities in a harsh way. I almost gave up on my life until the doctor told me that you had chances of survival. That moment when you opened your eyes........ Trust me, it was the best moment in my life Sonakshi." I told her as I saw her eyes blink and tears flowing. She looked so pained and her body just laid lifelessly against me.

"I.........want to sleep....please" she said as I just nodded. I knew everything that happened was just too much for her and she needed some rest.

"Do you want to have something to eat? You look so weak..." I said, hoping she would agree. But she didn't answer. She was in her own world. She laid down and closed her eyes, trying to get some sleep but she just couldn't.

"Goodnight..." I said softly as I brought the duvet to cover herself. She did not reply me and remained silent. I sighed and rested my back against the headboard.

What have I gotten myself into?

------------------

(Sona's POV)

"Sonakshi................." someone panted as my eyes became blurred with tears.

I couldn't move. My whole body felt like it was on fire. My throat gurgled as I struggled to breathe. I wish I could open my eyes and tell everyone how bad the pain is, but I just couldn't. I felt like I couldn't bear this pain anymore.

As the numbness of sleep slowly faded from my limbs I felt the rough grass poking into back, like tiny needles. I could feel my heart beating against my ribcage, slowing every second. Realization dawned on me..........I was going to die.

"Sonakshi... you have been a great colleague to me. My intention was not to hurt you....but nevertheless all I did was torture you. I am really sorry..... I never meant anything that I told you.............." I heard a stranger's voice.

Black painted the edges of my vision and the only thing I could hear was my own heartbeat. My breath came in ragged, shallow gasps. Seconds passed as I lay there and heard voices around me.

"Sonakshi........please come back. You need to be there to see Nisha being tortured.... She made me....... Do all this! God I am so sorry please forgive me........" the voice spoke as I choked. I didn't know why I felt so.... Maybe I knew the owner of the voice.....Yes I knew who it was... it was .......it was.....

Who was that? I wanted to see him...........talk to him..... but I couldn't. He continued talking but my mind couldn't process on those words as the pain in my body dominated all the thoughts. My breathing dropped and my body became numb. I felt as though I was paralysed. But there was a little hope.

'Sona you are strong.....please don't give up' the voice spoke again at the back of my mind as I smiled internally at my pathetic state.

Why shouldn't I give up? I have faced the worst and now, there is nothing left for you! Give up Sonakshi! Just throw away every single thing you treasured in life because they are not worth it. Not even Dev! Because he left you to suffer alone. You don't have to be strong all the time.

The more you are strong, the more they will break you!

Enough..... just leave Sona.....

Because death is way better than whatever you are facing

(Mind switches image)

My mind was still hazy. I felt numb. Nothing.... The pain that once burned like fire had faded away to an icy numbness. I could clearly guess that my body was giving up. My heartbeat decreased slowly like I was awaiting death.

That's when, I heard his voice.

"I believe you Sonakshi.... You will come back. I trust you. You can't leave us all alone. You have to come back for your parents, your friends..........and your Dev. Dev needs you Sonakshi. He is an idiot, a brainless man......but he is too broken Sonakshi. He can't survive without you.... You can come back and punish him. This time I will be always by your side in whatever decision you take..........."

His words splintered inside me causing more pain than the physical pain I was experiencing. I instantly knew it was Jatin. But I couldn't reach out to him. His voice was so soft and I could barely hear everything he was saying.

"Please..........Wake up Sona.... You can't make me guilty......I said I am sorry..." I heard his voice again.

"I have been a bad friend to you......"

Oh god no.......how can he say this?

My life from here on in is four walls and pain medication until I die. I don't want it, not any of it. Perhaps if I scream and scream for pain medication I can get some help. Why isn't anyone helping me? I want to wake up. Please let me see my family.... I need them.

(Mind switches image)

"Sona..... I know you hate me... But please, just come back. You can't give up. You can hate me, punish me in whatever ways you want. I promise I will punish those people who were responsible for this state of yours but please......come back. I just need you to be alright. You can't punish me like this..... Please Sonakshi. Just wake up..." I heard Dev's voice. He sounded so broken.

I wanted to wake up but I could't....

I didn't want to face anything anymore. I had seen and heard enough. I have always been a burden to everyone. My family, my love, my in laws and friends. I always gave them sadness which they didn't deserve. Everyone were happier without me. And now, they were all crying because of me...

I even made my friends cry.....

I don't want to live anymore...

"Sona......please stop thinking like that! You are stronger than that! Don't be stupid..." my inner mind chided.

No.... I don't want to be freaking strong! I am weak....probably the weakest human being on earth. I lost my sanity......... I was humiliated, abused and harassed. I caused a huge embarrassment to my family.... What else do I need? I see no reason to stay alive.....and my body is perfectly cooperating with my idea..... giving up is the easiest way...-

"No Sonakshi....don't..."

Everything was taken away....my respect, my happiness, parents and love....

"Sona you can come back.....A fighter never gives up..."

I lost! Now there is no more fighter inside me. Sonakshi Dixit is gone...........and Sonakshi Bose was....killed.....

"No.......please. Don't Sona."

I will be gone forever. I don't want to see this world.

"Sona, please..."

GONE!

"Doctor, patient is losing conscious...........we fear that she may slip into-"

------------------

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH", I screamed as I jerked up from the bed.

No....no....no.... this isn't real. This was probably just another nightmare.... Just something else, I told myself in order to calm down, but it wasn't working. I remembered the same darkness, I was once in.

This time, it wasn't a nightmare. It was a memory. I didn't see images. Instead, I saw darkness. I want to be able to see their faces, their expression and console them. But it was too dark. Darkness had taken its stranglehold, squeezing life and consuming my memories. It turned them into forgotten and lost dreams.

My feet were bare and that's the only reason I know the ground is still there. Everything else had dissolved like it was never there at all, like the universe hasn't even begun, or perhaps it never was. In the darkness I couldn't get a sense that anything was important at all.........like life, death and pain.

I quickly looked down and all I saw was blood. It made me feel nauseas. I couldn't take it.... As I started screaming.

Dev's POV

I jolted up from my sleep as I heard a loud scream. Swallowing hard, I clutched furiously at my chest, hoping that by a scratch or simple graze, my heart would stop racing. Everything was blurry. For a second, I didn't know what was happening around me. As my brain finally started processing, I realized that Sonakshi was screaming next to me.

My heart dropped once again when I heard her horrifying screams and sobs. I pushed the blankets away and moved closer to her as she kept screaming her lungs out. I moved towards her and gathered her in my arms before she could hurt herself.

"It's...okay baby.... It's okay" I tried soothing her, trying to grip both of her hands in mine but she was trashing and writhing while sobbing. God....what happened?

"You!!! Go away....I hate you.....go away" her frail arms hit my cheek and I gritted my teeth to calm my temper. This was not the time to be angry. Her legs hit mine with such a force that I had to stop myself from getting help from others in the house. I gripped both of her wrists in my hand whilst the other braced her body at stop. She stopped struggling and glared at me, with her breaths coming out in pants.

"I don't....." she shook her head, slipping back to a corner as I grabbed her hands in mine tightly, "I......." she looked around frantically, as if she was searching for someone. "Here......how am I here?" she breathed and tugged her hands. Not understanding what she wanted I didn't let go of her hands.

"Stop....." she screeched.

"Go away...........please.......Don't come near me" she screamed as I let go of her hands. She started crying and got out from the bed. She stumbled to a corner and slid down in a corner of the room. She slumped down on the cold floor and looked scared. She sniffled and rubbed her wrists as she stared around the room.

I didn't know what was happening to her. I was trying to help her but without her permission, how do I do that? She should have had some horrible nightmare, judging from her reaction. But how do I calm her down? She hadn't reacted like this ever before..... Her face looked like she was traumatized. She hugged her knees and rocked back and forth.

"No....no..." she kept murmuring as tears slid down her cheeks on to her knees. I quickly turned on the lights and got off from the bed. I swallowed and blinked back my tears when I touched her hair lightly. She didn't flinch this time, but she looked at me curiously.

"Liar...." She whispered and my heart started beating furiously inside my chest.

"So many lies..." she started shaking her head and her cries became louder.

"You....cheated me............... you made me suffer! It's all because of you. You gave me the pain which is higher than death!" she mumbled and my heart stopped.

Suddenly her eyes moved towards her stomach and her eyes widened. She started screaming, making me panic. It was late night and her screaming was so loud that it could have woken up the entire neighbourhood.

Listen to her cries, my mum and Neha dashed inside the room but after seeing them, her cries increased. She looked at my mother like she had seen a ghost.

"PLEASE......... ASK HER TO GO AWAY......... SHE IS A HEARTLESS PERSON! ASK HER TO GO...PLEASE" Sonakshi screamed as I looked over my shoulder and saw my mother.

What was she doing here? I sighed and glared at her. I silently motioned Neha to get out of the room along with my mother who did nothing but stand there motionlessly. Thankfully both of them took the hint and left us alone.

"My clothes......" she touched her blouse and started tugging it harshly. When it was difficult to pull it away, she cried and yanked her blouse harshly, tearing the blouse from her shoulder. I placed my hand over hers' and stopped her actions.

"T-take it off...... It's all blood.... I can't take it..." she sniffled helplessly.

"S...so m-much of blood..." she sobbed, yanking the blouse from her body. She got up from the floor and struggled to get the piece of cloth away from her body. I sighed and rubbed my face.

"You will hurt yourself..... Let me do it, sweetheart." I said and slowly placed her on the bed. I grabbed her hands and placed it on her lap. For a moment, she stopped crying and looked at me curiously. It was almost as if she was trying to read my emotions.

I unzipped the zipper at the back of the blouse and dragged it over her shoulders. All the while, her eyes remained fixed on my face. I stood up and removed my shirt before slipping it on her naked body. Sona stayed fixed like a robot while I did my part carefully. She was like the calm before the storm.

"It's done..." I said softly after tucking her hair away from her face. I silently sat beside her in my tank top and adjusted her tops which was now loosely hanging on her body.

"I...." her lips trembled and she contemplated on telling me. She looked deeply troubled at this point. I didn't know what to do. So, I just hugged her, to which she did not protest at the moment.

"He was here......talking to me...... he..... and I know him." Her frightened eyes roamed around the room as she slipped back from my embrace.

"No one is here Sona.... Only me" I said gently and checked the room once again to see whether anyone entered.

"He....y-you.....ambulance.....he was with me.....who was that..." she stammered as she shook her head.

Shit......Is she talking about Neil?

"Baby... what's wrong?" I asked trying to calm her down but she wasn't having any of it.

"My head hurts...." She mumbled and I sighed.

This is more difficult than what I had thought.

"I can't do this...... They hurt me a lot." she choked as her eyes kept roaming around the room.

My eyes widened in fear. Did she recall everything already? Is that the reason for her outburst once she saw my mum?

"I am sorry..." I whispered as she sighed, tears filling her eyes again.

"No..." she shook her head. "Please don't say anything! I don't want to hear it." she hissed as tears rolled down her cheeks again. Her breathing started to drop slowly. Her head rested on my shoulder and her eyes closed. Once again, faint sobs left her mouth.

"It's going to be okay sweetheart..." I said gently kissing her forehead and patting her back to sleep.

Little did I know that nothing was going to be okay when she wakes up!

************

Precap : Sonakshi wakes up and............

***WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF NIGHTMARES!***

For those who have no idea what Sonakshi is facing, then let me tell you! It's a type of hallucination for people who have gone through extreme trauma! It happens rarely for accident cases but mostly for people who have been abused, raped or people who have met real life murders...(not wanting to go deep in it)

I love experimenting and learning new things...and I equally enjoy writing similar things and sharing with you guys!

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