Dancin' around the lies we tell
(The university district)
Whenever the crew left Black Veil Island, they wore the costumes of the Komedie Brute. But here on the respectable avenues of the university district, Wylan and Jesper had ditched their costumes.
Jesper had dressed as respectably as he could. Once again he found himself reaching for his revolvers. Smeet had ordered the floor boss to store them in a safe at the Cumulus.
Kaz said they'd get them back, but he doubted Kaz would be so calm and collected if someone had swiped his cane. Jesper reminded himself. He'd done it for Aeolian. And if he was honest, he'd done it for Kaz too, to show he was willing to do what it took to make things right. Not that it seemed to matter much.
Even thought they were entering the University. This was Ketterdam, and it was possible he and Wylan were walking into a trap. That was why Kaz and Matthias were shadowing their steps.
Rotty had taken a message to the hotel where the man claiming to be Jesper's father was staying, so they could set a time and place to meet. If his father really was in Ketterdam, it was possible he was being used as bait.
Jesper sometimes wondered what might have happened if he'd never walked into that gambling parlor and taken that first spin at Makker's Wheel. It was meant to be harmless fun. But Jesper's life had split into two: the time before he'd stepped up to that wheel and every day since.
The Barrel eats people. Every few years some reformer got it into his head to clean up the Barrel and purge Ketterdam of its unsavory reputation. That was when the pamphlets came out, a war of propaganda between the owners of the gambling dens and pleasure houses on one side and the black suited merch reformers on the other. In the end, it all came down to money.
The businesses of East and West Stave turned a serious profit, and the denizens of the Barrel dumped very righteous coin into the city's tax coffers.
"You don't have to come, you know," Jesper said.
"Is that what you want?" Wylan asked.
"No. I can't do this alone." Jesper shrugged.
He wasn't sure how he felt about what Wylan might witness. But Jesper couldn't bear the thought of facing his father on his own. Aeolian would have understood. Not that he deserved her sympathy, after what he'd done. But there was something steady in her that ease his own fears. He'd hoped that Kaz would offer to accompany him. But Kaz had spared him only one dark glance. The message had been clear: You dug this grave. Go lie in it.
Kaz was still punishing him for the ambush that had nearly ended the Ice Court job before it began—the ambush that took Aeolian to the brink of death. And it was going to take more than Jesper sacrificing his revolvers for him to earn his way back into Kaz's good graces. Did Kaz even have good graces?
Maybe, he did once. Maybe, he never had. But Jesper had saw the intensity in Kaz's eyes that night, when Aeolian was taken and when Kaz revealed that, he knew all along that it was Jesper who sold them off. He had no mercy in him. But Kaz was never merciful was he?
It had been nearly two years since Jesper had set foot on university grounds. He'd never officially withdrawn from school. He hadn't even really decided not to attend. He'd simply started spending more and more time on East Stave, until he looked up one day and realized the Barrel had become his home.
As they entered the courtyard, Jesper focused on the man standing near the eastern wall, a crumpled hat clasped in his hands. With a pang, Jesper realized his father had worn his best suit. Colm Fahey looked like a farmer on his way to church. Totally out of place. Anyone in the Barrel—would take one look at him and just see a walking target.
Jesper's throat felt dry. "Da," he croaked.
His father's head snapped up and Jesper steeled himself. But he wasn't prepared for the relieved grin that split his father's craggy features. Someone might as well have put a bullet right in Jesper's heart.
"Jes!" his father cried.
And then Jesper was crossing the courtyard and his father's arms were tight around him. "All Saints, I thought you were dead. They said you weren't a student here anymore, that you'd just vanished..."
"I'm alive, Da," Jesper gasped. "Um, this is Wylan," he said, switching from Zemeni to Kerch.
"Nice to meet you. Do you speak Kerch?" his father practically shouted, and Jesper realized it was because Wylan still looked Shu.
"Nice to meet you, Mister Fahey," said Wylan. Bless his merch manners.
Jesper thought, that when the day comes, when he'd face his father. Aeolian would be beside him, easing him and buttering Colm up. But the Shu girl wasn't here today. Because she'd been taken by Wylan's father. Who would've thought, their lives would have come to this.
"Jesper, what has been happening? I received a notice from the Gemensbank. The loan is coming due, and you'd given me to believe it was temporary. And your studies_" before Colm could complete his sentence. A shot rang out against the walls of the courtyard.
"Saints!" his father gasped. "This city is worse than the guidebooks said!"
"Da," Jesper said, pulling the pistol from his coat. "They're after me. Or after us. Hard to say."
More shots rang.
"I've got two flash bombs and something new I rigged up." Wylan said.
"Bombs?" Colm asked, blinking as if to wake himself from a bad dream.
"Trust me, Da." That's all Jesper could say.
He started firing leaping into the courtyard. He'd gone in blind, but he picked out the shapes on the roof quickly, aiming by instinct. He didn't need to kill anyone, he just needed to scare the hell out of them and buy Wylan and his father time.
"All Saints," he shouted as pain tore through his shoulder. He really hated being shot. Just a scratch, but it hurt like hell.
"Jesper!" Wylan's yelled, "two o'clock."
Without thinking, he aimed and fired. The air exploded.
"Get in the water!" Wylan shouted.
Jesper dove into the fountain, and a second later the air sizzled with light. Just what kind of bomb had Wylan let loose?
They bolted for the doorway beneath the stairs.
Jesper pointed his gun at the scholar's chest. "Move."
"Jesper!" his father said.
"Don't worry, Da. People point guns at each other all the time in Ketterdam. It's basically a handshake." Jesper said.
"Certainly not," said the scholar.
Jesper waved them on. "Depends on the neighborhood. Let's go."
They pelted down the main aisle of the reading room. Students huddled against the wall and under their chairs, probably thinking they were all about to die.
"Nothing to worry about, everyone!" Jesper called. "Just a little target practice in the courtyard."
When they reached the westernmost wall, they stopped in front of a map of Ravka. Then Wylan pressed a symbol as a dark gap appeared. They squeezed through.
"It was built as a way for professors to not deal with angry students." Wylan said.
"Angry?" Colm said. "Do all the students have guns?"
"No, but there's a long-standing tradition of rioting over grades." Jesper said.
From behind them, Jesper could hear shouting from the rare books room. It had been a close call, he was bleeding from his shoulder, they'd made a grand escape: these were the moments he lived for. But all he could think was, Da could have been hurt. He could have died. Jesper was used to people shooting at him. This was different. His father hadn't chosen this fight. His only crime had been putting his faith in his son.
That's the problem with Ketterdam, trusting the wrong person can get you killed .
◾️▪️◾️▪️◾️
Nina couldn't stop staring at Colm Fahey. It was just something so strange about seeing a person that wholesome surrounded by Ketterdam's worst.
Nina started tallying her life in good days and bad days, and this was turning out to be a very bad day. She couldn't afford to let it get the best of her, not when they were this close to rescuing Aeolian.
Be all right, doll. Nina willed silently, hoping her thoughts could somehow reach her lovely friend. Stay safe and whole and wait for us.
Nina hadn't been on Vellgeluk when Van Eck had taken Aeolian hostage. She'd still been trying to purge the parem from her body. She told herself to be grateful for the memory of that misery, every shaking, aching, vomiting minute of it.
The shame of Matthias witnessing it all, as she screamed at him for more parem. She made herself remember every terrible thing she'd said, each insult or accusation she'd hurled at him.
You enjoy watching me suffer. You want me to beg, don't you? How long have you been waiting to see me like this? Stop punishing me, Matthias. Help me. Be good to me and I'll be good to you.
After Kaz had settled them on Black Veil, Nina had managed to last two days before she'd broken down and gone to Kuwei to ask him for another dose of jurda parem.
"Do you have any more?" She asked.
"I gave it all to Matthias." He'd told her.
She'd wanted to claw his face to shreds. Because she couldn't possibly go to Matthias. And for all she knew, he'd thrown whatever supply of the drug into the sea.
The thought filled her with so much panic that she'd had to race outside and vomit. She found a quiet place to sit and weep. No one could understand what she was going through, only if Aeolian was here, she would've. Nina missed the Shu girl so deeply, that she needed the drug to suppress the ache.
She looked around the graves, somehow the stillness of Black Veil comforted her. She couldn't explain why. The places of the dead had never held solace for her before.
You survived the worst of it, she had told herself. The parem is out of reach, and now you can stop thinking about it. And she'd managed for a while.
Then last night, when she'd been preparing to cozy up to Cornelis Smeet, she'd made the mistake of using her power and attempted to tailor the circles beneath her eyes—the hunger for parem hit.
She'd forced herself to think of the shame on the boat, the future she might be able to make with Matthias, but the thought that had brought her back to sanity was Aeolian. She owed Aeolian her life, and there was no way she was leaving her stranded with Van Eck. She wasn't that person. She refused to be.
But once the job was done, and everyone had fallen asleep, she'd dug through Matthias' few belongings, her frustration growing with every passing second. She hated him. She hated Kuwei. She hated this stupid city.
Disgusted with herself, she'd slipped beneath his blankets. She'd let her hands wander, seeking his pockets. Her hands continuing their search. She pressed a kiss to his neck. She'd never let herself kiss him this way before. But once she'd taken the parem—it was all she could think of, the desire she felt was for the drug, not for the body. She didn't kiss his lips, though. She wouldn't let drug take that from her too.
He'd groaned slightly. "The others..." Then he'd seized her hands. "Stop! I don't have it."
She yanked herself free. "Then who does?"
"Kaz." He said. "Are you going to creep into his bed?"
Nina released a huff of disbelief. "He'd slit my throat."
She wanted to scream her helplessness. There would be no bargaining with Kaz. She couldn't bully him like Wylan or the way she might have managed Jesper. If only Aeolian was here, she could've bargained with Kaz, but she would never...Nina knew, Aeolian would never help her in this.
Fatigue came on suddenly, she rested her forehead against Matthias' chest. He'd wrapped his arms around her and gotten her talking about Ravka, about Aeolian. She must have drifted off, because the next thing she knew, she was woken by the sound of the tomb door slamming open.
Matthias and Kaz had returned from the university, holes burned into their clothing from some kind of bomb Wylan had made, Jesper and Wylan close on their heels, with a beefy Kaelish-looking farmer—Colm Fahey.
Though the hunger for parem had dulled, it was still there, and she had no idea how she was going to get through the mission tonight. Seducing Smeet had only been the first part of their plan. Kaz was counting on her, Aeolian was counting on her. They needed her to be a Corporalnik, not an addict.
But Nina couldn't think about any of that with Colm Fahey standing there, and Jesper looking like he'd rather take the journey back to the Ice Court again than facing him, and Kaz...She had no idea what to expect from Kaz. Anger, maybe worse. Kaz didn't like surprises or potential vulnerabilities, and Jesper's father was a vulnerability.
But after hearing Jesper's breathless description of how they'd escaped the university, Kaz simply leaned on his cane and said. "Were you followed?"
"No," Jesper replied.
"Wylan?" Kaz asked.
Colm bristled. "You doubt my son's word?"
Jesper said. "He doubts everyone's word."
Kaz's expression had been unruffled, his voice so easy and pleasant that Nina felt the hair rise on her arms. "Apologies, Mister Fahey. A habit one develops in the Barrel. Trust but verify."
"Or don't trust at all," muttered Matthias.
"I counted about ten on the roof," said Kaz, and Matthias nodded. Kaz eyes focused on Colm. "You were the bait. The bank called in your loan?"
Colm blinked, surprised. "Yes, they sent me a letter saying that if I didn't pay in full, they would be forced to take legal action." Then he turned to Jesper. "I wrote to you, Jes...they're threatening to take the farm."
Nina wondered how Jesper maintained this ruse for so long. No matter his reasons, Jesper had been conning his own father.
Jesper's eyes were on the floor. "I was trying to get the money, Da..."
Colm's was frustrated. "We're sitting in a tomb. We were just shot at!"
"What got you on a ship to Ketterdam?" Kaz asked.
"The bank moved up the collection date!" Colm said. "I tried to reach Jes, but when there was no reply, I feared the worst. The city does have a reputation."
"Well deserved, I promise you," Kaz said easily. "And when you arrived?"
"I made inquiries at the university. They said he wasn't enrolled, so I went to the constabulary." Colm explained.
Jesper winced. "The stadwatch?"
Colm crushed his hat. "Where was I supposed to go. You know how dangerous it is for...you."
"Da," Jesper said. "You didn't tell them I'm Grisha!"
"Of course not!" Colm muttered. "I don't understand any of this. Why would you bring me to this horrible place? Why were we shot at? What has become of your studies? What has become of you?"
"It was my fault," Wylan blurted. Every eye turned to him. "He was concerned about the bank loan, so he put his studies on hold to work with a...local gunsmith and then I...I told him about a deal_"
"They were swindled," Kaz voice steady and cold as ever. "They were offered a business opportunity that seemed too good to be true."
"Did you and your twin brother lose everything?" Colm asked Wylan with a glance at Kuwei, who sat quietly observing the proceedings.
"Yes. They lost everything. Wylan's brother hasn't spoken a word since." Kaz said.
Colm asked. "And you are all...students?"
"Of a sort," said Kaz.
"Who spend your free hours in a graveyard. Can we not go to the authorities?" Colm looked at Kaz.
"The authorities can't help you," Kaz said. "Not in this city. Because the law here is profit. The only way to get justice is to take it for yourself."
"And that's where you come in." Colm gave Kaz a questionable look.
Kaz nodded. "We're going to get your money. You won't lose your farm."
Colm shook his head. "You barely look old enough to graduate."
"Ketterdam was my education. And I can tell you this: Jesper never would have turned to me for help if he'd had anywhere else to go." Kaz drummed his gloved fingers on the crow's head.
"You can't be so bad, boy," said Colm gruffly. "You haven't been alive long enough to rack up your share of sin."
"You don't want to know his rack of sins," Nina huffed.
The tomb went silent for a while. Then Colm asked. "Can I trust you?"
"No." Kaz replied.
"But you can trust him to help Jesper through this," Nina told Colm.
Colm sighed. He looked around at all of them. "You lot make me feel very old."
"Spend a little more time in Ketterdam," said Kaz. "You'll feel ancient."
Then he tilted his head to one side and Nina saw that distant, considering look cross his features. "You have an honest face, Mister Fahey."
If Aeolian was here, she'd have said 'scheming face'. Nina missed her deeply.
Colm said. "Thank you for marking it."
"It's not a compliment," said Jesper. "And I know that look, Kaz. Don't you dare start those wheels spinning."
Kaz's only response was a slow blink. Whatever scheme had been set in motion in his diabolical brain, it was too late to stop it now. "It isn't safe to go back to wherever you're staying. We're moving you to the Geldrenner Hotel. We'll register you under a different name."
"But why?" Colm sputtered.
"Because some people want Jesper dead, and they already used you to lure him out of hiding once. I have no doubt they'd be willing to take you hostage, and there's too much of that going around already." Kaz scribbled a few instructions to Rotty and handed him a very thick stack of kruge.
Colm considered Rotty and then Kaz. Then responded. "No." He turned to Jesper. "We'll find another way to pay the debt. Or we'll start over somewhere else."
"You're not giving up the farm," Jesper said. "She's there. We can't leave her. Da, I know I let you down. Just give me one more chance."
"We don't belong here, Jes. This place is too loud, too lawless. Nothing makes sense." Colm looked at Jesper.
"Da," Jesper shrugged. "It's not only the farm...but Lin...she's in trouble as well...because of me..."
"Who's Lin?" Colm asked. "And what kind of trouble?"
There was no response. The tomb felt silently still.
"Mister Fahey," Kaz said quietly. "You know what they say about walking in a cow pasture?"
All eyes were on Kaz. What did the bastard of the Barrel know about cow pastures?
"Keep your head down and watch your step," Colm replied.
Kaz nodded. "Just think of Ketterdam as a really big cow pasture. Give us three days to get your money and get you both out of Kerch safely."
"Is that really possible?" Colm was surprised.
"Anything can happen in this city." Kaz nodded.
Colm rose. "Three days, Jesper. Then we go home. With or without the money." He rested a hand on Jesper's shoulder. "And for Saints' sake, be careful. All of you."
Matthias had lost his family to war. Nina had been taken from her family to train when she was just a little girl. Wylan had been as good as evicted from his father's house. Kuwei had lost his father and his country. And Kaz? None of them knew what dark alley Kaz had crawled out of. But Jesper had somewhere to go, someone take care of him.
Nina wished Colm Fahey could march over to Jan Van Eck's office and tell him to give Aeolian back or get a mouth full of knuckles. She wished someone in this city would help them, that they weren't so alone. She wished Jesper's father could take them all with him. She'd never been to Novyi Zem, but the longing for those golden fields felt just like homesickness.
But Kaz was right—if they wanted justice, they would have to take it for themselves. That didn't ease the starved-heart pang in her chest.
Colm disappeared through the stone graves with Rotty and Specht.
Wylan said. "It can't be coincidence that the bank called in his loan when they did...if the banks are involved, my father maybe behind it."
"Pekka Rollins has influence at the banks too," Kaz said. "Or they might be working together..."
Jesper rubbed his hands over his face. "All the Saints and your Aunt Eva, let's hope not."
"I'm not ruling anything out," said Kaz. Then he reached inside one of the niches in the wall.
"My revolvers!" Jesper exclaimed, clutching them to his chest. "You got them back! Thank you, Kaz. Thank you."
Any hint of the warmth Kaz had shown Colm Fahey was gone. "What good is a shooter without his guns?" Kaz asked, seemingly oblivious to the way Jesper's smile collapsed. "You've been in the red too long. We all have. This is the night we start paying our debts."
Now night had fallen and they were on their way to do just that. The boat cut silently through the water.
"We better be right about all this," Wylan said. "My father is going to be ready."
"I'm counting on it," Kaz replied.
Nina let her fingers brush against the grip of the pistol. She had never needed a gun before. But she didn't trust herself now. She couldn't make a mistake, not when Aeolian's life depended on it.
Nina knew that if she'd been on Vellgeluk, the battle would have gone differently. Aeolian never would have been taken if Nina had been strong enough to face Van Eck's henchmen.
And if she'd had parem? No one could have stood against her. If she had parem, she'd be completely addicted and on her way to the Reaper's Barge.
No one spoke as they reached shore and disembarked as quickly and quietly as possible. Kaz gestured for them to get to their positions. He would approach from the north, Matthias and Wylan from the east. Nina and Jesper would be responsible for the guards on the west.
Nina flexed her fingers. A few weeks ago it would have been easy. Slow their pulses. But now she wasn't quite sure of herself.
They saw two guards leaned against the low stone wall, rifles propped beside them.
Nina focused on the guards, but the gift that had been there inside her for as long as she could remember, had simply ceased to beat. All she could think of was parem.
"What are you waiting for?" said Jesper.
Alerted by some sound or simply their presence, the guards headed to their direction.
Jesper's hands went to his guns. If Jesper had to shoot, the other guards would be alerted. The alarm would be raised, and this whole endeavor might go straight to hell.
Nina focused with all her will. The hunger for parem seized her, she ignored it. This is for Aeolian, this is for Aeolian. She reminded herself.
One of the guards faltered, went to his knees.
"Gillis!" said the other guard. "Halt!" he shouted in their direction.
Nina clenched her fist, trying to squeeze the guard's larynx shut to prevent him from calling for help.
Jesper drew his gun.
No! She was not going to be the reason this went wrong. She was going to be the reason, Aeolian would never see them again. Or worse, she was going to be the reason the Shu girl meets her end. Never! Rage swept through Nina, and suddenly, she had hold of something—a cloud of dust. It shot toward the standing guard. The guard opened his mouth to scream and the cloud vanished. He let out a grunt and toppled backward.
The other guard was still balancing woozily on his knees. They strode forward, and Jesper gave him a whack with the butt of his revolver. The man slumped to the ground, unconscious.
They examined the other guard. His mouth and nostrils were choked with fine white dust. Nina felt like she could taste the dust in her own mouth. This shouldn't be possible. A Corporalnik could manipulate the human body, not inorganic matter.
Nina felt a strange crawling sensation all over her body, but the need for parem wasn't screaming through her any longer. I didn't mean to kill him. It didn't matter. This is Ketterdam, people die everyday. The guards were down and the plan was in motion.
"Come on," she said. "Let's go get our girl."
[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]
🎵🎵🎵
Wait 'til you're announced
We've not yet lost all our graces
The hounds will stay in chains
Look upon Your Greatness and She'll
Send the call out, send the call out
Send the call out, send the call out
Send the call out, send the call out
Send the call out, send the call out
Send the call out, send the call out
Send the call out, send the call out
Send the call out, send the call out
Send the call out, send the call out
Call all the ladies out
They're in their finery
A hundred jewels on throats
A hundred jewels between teeth
Now bring my boys in
Their skin in craters like the moon
The moon we love like a brother
While he glows through the room
Dancin' around the lies we tell
Dancin' around big eyes as well, ah
Even the comatose
They don't dance and tell
We live in cities you'll never see on-screen
Not very pretty, but we sure know how to run things
Livin' in ruins of a palace within my dreams
And you know we're on each other's team
I'm kind of over gettin' told to throw my hands up in the air
So there
So all the cups got broke
Shards beneath our feet
But it wasn't my fault
And everyone's competing for a love they won't receive
'Cause what this palace wants is release
We live in cities you'll never see on-screen
Not very pretty, but we sure know how to run things
Livin' in ruins of a palace within my dreams
And you know we're on each other's team
I'm kind of over gettin' told to throw my hands up in the air
So there
I'm kind of older than I was when I reveled without a care
So there
We live in cities you'll never see on-screen
Not very pretty, but we sure know how to run things
Livin' in ruins of a palace within my dreams
And you know we're on each other's team
We're on each other's team
And you know we're on each other's team
We're on each other's team
And you know, and you know, and you know
🎵🎵🎵
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