Posted: July 30, 2020

♔ Aarav ♔

2.53 To Hell...

          I shield Arshiya's face in my chest to keep her eyes from flickering over to the dead body of Narayan Raichand. Even if Arshiya has had a close brush with death twice in her life, she does not need to see it. And I hate, hate, that tonight, anything could have happened. Anything. Despite all the precautions taken her whole life, something could have happened to her and I might not have reached her in time.

She murmurs against my shirt, "home," and I brush a hand over her hair.

Home. Yes.

"Vikas, we're going home." With my family is where I want to be as well.

Aarush suggests, "Aarav, maybe now is not the right time. Let her rest tonight. You can leave tomorrow."

I gather her in my arms and stand on my shaking knees. "She will rest in her own bed. Annie, let's go."

She touches my arm gently, "Maybe Aarush is right, Aarav."

I stick to my decision. It's not just for Arshiya's wish to be home right now. I have to go home too. I need to go home. "There's no way I can tell mom about tonight over the phone."

She understands within a second that I am speaking about Anjali mom. All I want right now is to get home, take my loved ones with me where I know we'll all be safe, and hug my mom. Telling her about tonight won't be easy. She'll have sleepless nights for a while before she'll be at ease again. Heck, I don't know how well I'll sleep either.

Tonight has rattled the core of my being with just the thought that history could have repeated itself. Even if we prevented it and got to Annie and Arshiya on time, it pricked at wounds I thought I had buried. I was too young to know how I felt at the time, but today I understand what dad must have gone through in that single night when Lavanya and Anjali were kidnapped by Shyam.

It's never going to leave me.

. . . ∞ . ∞ . ∞ . ∞. . .

          Jhanvi meets us by the entrance as we walk out of the tunnels. She heaves a sigh of relief seeing us all. "Oh, thank God! I was so worried I wanted to come down myself but," she glares at Aarush's men at either sides of the tunnels, "they wouldn't let me. They physically restrained me, can you believe that?"

Aarush stops in front of her, rubbing her upper arm and leaning in to kiss her shoulder. "That's their job."

She scowls at them, "Then we are going to have a long conversation about what your people are allowed to do when protecting me." She then looks past him to see Arshiya in my arms and not far behind me, Randeep has his hand over his bleeding wound. Vikas is supporting Randeep's father. She gasps, "What happened?! We need to get them to the hospital!"

"No, I just need to make a call," Aarush says and then steps aside to do just that. I imagine, calling the doctor.

Leaving Arshiya in trusted hands of Mohit, I step up to her. She smiles up at me before standing on her toes and throwing her arms around me, "I'm so glad you're okay. Glad is an understatement, actually."

I hug her back and somehow she senses a change in the way I hold her to me. How do I explain to her the guilt I feel. A remnant of my past came back to affect her. Before, I only had to feel bad about worrying her by getting kidnapped. But now...

She pulls back, her smile dropping. "What is it, Aarav?"

I lower my gaze, whispering. "I'm sorry." She remains standing in front of me, confused. Lifting my head, I give her the news no daughter should have to hear. "Your father is..."

The wrinkles on her forehead eases. "Dead," she says and for a second, her voice is cold. Her entire demeanor is, and it reminds me of the Jhanvi I had met about a year ago. She touches my face, her fingers gentle and her voice turns soft once again. "You don't ever need to apologize or feel bad for that, Aarav. When I heard the gunshot, I was going ballistics because I thought it was one of you. Whether he lived or died is something I made peace with a while back."

"But he..."

She shakes her head, countering with a single question that puts things in perspective, "Would you shed a tear if Shyam died?"

"Fuck no." My jaw clenches and she smiles. I keep my cursing to minimal on a normal basis, but she'd asked a ridiculous question. Still, I get it. My guilt was ridiculous too. I don't need to feel bad if one man like Narayan is taken from this world. It's a good thing for everyone. It just sucks sometimes to have to deal with my morals.

Things would be so much easier without them, but that is the exact reason we need morals and need to hold on to them.

I already know Jhanvi's answer even before I say the words. "Come with me."

'Where?"

"Home. I'm going back tonight."

She is silent for a second. I can see the wheels turning in her brain. Trying to think of a way to say no without hurting my feelings. Eventually, she settles on a sigh. "You already know my answer, Aarav."

I exhale, letting my shoulders loosen and tuck her head to my chest. "I still had to ask." I don't like leaving her here to deal with the aftermath.

She assures me, patting my back. "I'm not alone here."

Pressing a kiss to the top of her head, I pull back just in time for Aarush to join us again. "No, you are not." I agree, convincing my unsettled heart that she was in safe hands. Aarush was a good man and he'd protect her till the end. Not only that, he'll love her the way she deserves, and that is more than what I could have asked for.

I still remember the day I'd promised her. That I'd be with her till someone else came in her life. Then, all she'd have to do was tell me. Ofcourse, some things changed during our journey towards our destinations, but I am happy that in the end, she did find someone for whom her feelings weren't arranged for like they might have been if I had fooled myself into believing our friendship was more than that.

. . . ∞ . ∞ . ∞ . ∞. . .

          The next hour passes rather quickly. The doctor Aarush rang checked on Randeep, his father, and Arshiya. Once he gave the clear for her to fly, I nodded at Mohit and Vikas to grab our bags and load them in the car. We said our goodbyes to Aarush and Jhanvi. I kissed Inaaya, promising her I'd visit her soon - not that she understood or it meant anything to an infant. And then, we set off for the airport.

Once we are in air, I unbuckle my seatbelt and take Annie's hand who is on the seat next to me. Arshiya is behind us, lying down on the couch while Ishaan is across from her on another seat. Mohit and Vikas are at the very front having their own conversations. Annie looks at me with questioning eyes and I reach across the arm rest between us to unbuckle her seatbelt. Once she's free, I tug her to stand and pull her to my lap.

"Aarav?" She questions, looking around us.

With my arms around her waist, I hold her in a body hug, my lips buried in her shoulder.

I don't care if any of them are looking at us. Since Arshiya and her have been back, I have wanted to grab her in my arms and keep her there. But with everything going down and then Arshiya almost fainting from her run, I have been distracted.

On top, I have no idea what words to use once we get home.

She turns her head to kiss my jaw. "I'm okay, darling. He didn't touch me. Or Arshiya."

I will the tears away, unclench my jaw to soften my face and loosen my hold around her just enough for her to lean back. "Tonight was hell," I rest my forehead against her, allowing her scent to fill my heart. Convince myself that everyone I cared about was unharmed and we'd live to see another day.

Arshiya calls out from behind us, "Just kiss her already, bro. We're not watching."

Annie chuckles even as I find my lips tugging up in a smile. None of our moments are ever uninterrupted, but I don't mind. Tonight, I don't mind at all. Hearing that chirpiness back in my sister's voice fuels me with newfound energy. Annie doesn't anticipate it and gasps when I plant a kiss on her smiling lips. Her shock could have something to do with the fact that our moments have been private, but she is quick to kiss back, lifting her hand to brush her fingers over my jawline even as her other hand finds the base of my head. Her fingers knot themselves in my hair with a quick tug.

Her touch elicits a groan that I bite back, digging my fingers into her side. Her lips vibrate against mine in a hmm and I fight the temptation to nibble on her lip, seeking entrance into her mouth and deepening the kiss. Exploring her mouth. Letting our tongues battle it out.

Taste. Tease. Seduce.

I want more. So much more. But I can't lose myself to a kiss. It can't turn into a heavy make out session nor can I let my hands wander, giving in to my desire of touching her everywhere, finding her sensitive spots on her skin, learning every inch of her body, her smallest reactions.

There are children just a few feet away from us.

Reluctantly, I drag away from her. Our chests rising and falling in heavy breaths. I look at her face. Her eyes, closed. Catching her breath. Composing herself. And I imagine what her face will look like when she's under me, writhing in pleasure, as we take it all the way. Just the thought causes my already hard erection to grow. It mostly definitely does not help that I had pulled her to my lap.

Bad move on my end.

Her eyes flutter open even as she bites at the corner of her lower lip, undoubtedly feeling my arousal. As I read her eyes, I learn that it isn't a one way street. Her pupils are dilated, and I don't believe I have ever seen her turned on. "If this is how you kiss me when you think something's gonna happen to me, then..." Before I can scold her for where her thought is headed, she bites her tongue and scolds herself. "Fuck, wrong words. I just meant..."

"I know," I quietly say, forgiving quickly. I'll just have to work on letting her know my feelings for her through actions at all times. I'm great at it with words, and it's almost ironic. I learned everything from dad - well, a lot of it, atleast - and he's known to express himself through his actions. Khushi had to work a lot on him for him to get comfortable with his words. Then how the hell did I turn the opposite when it comes to this? I should be just as good with my actions.

Now, I can do grand actions. I go all the way when it comes to making someone in my family feel special.

Family.

The thought is like a splash of cold water.

I blink back at Annie when she says, "By the way, I am planning our next date."

"Hmm?" I am only half listening to her.

"I mean it! Both dates you planned so far have been interrupted. I won't have the same happening the third time as well."

Right. Our dates have not ended the way we'd have hoped for. "Third time's the charm?" I say, hoping that the next time, my family won't interrupt.

"It better be, which is why I will plan it and not you. You might throw the perfect party, Raizada, but you are not the best at planning dates" Her head is set on taking the lead, and as much as I want to give her the perfect date that I failed the last two times, I tell myself that I am not a control freak. Or that because I am the man and she a woman, it doesn't mean she can't plan an evening out.

I'll get better with time.

. . . ∞ . ∞ . ∞ . ∞. . .

          Vikas must have called ahead to get one of his men to arrange for a car to receive us at the runway. Once we land, we settle in two cars. My phone vibrates with notifications as it receives cell service. Two missed calls from dad. Rather than calling him back, I decide to wait. I'll be in front of him within the next 40 minutes.

Arshiya looks up from her phone, "You too, hmm?"

"Yup." He could have called her first and then me when he couldn't reach her.

When the cars pull up in the driveway and we walk up to the front steps across the lawn, my heart thuds away at a rapid pace. No amount of deep breathing is going to help. There is no good way to do this. As if sensing the fear gripping my heart, Annie slips her hand to mine. I glance at her, and then to my right when Arshiya takes my other sweaty hand. They both smile at me and I let myself lean on them a little when usually, everyone else leans on me.

Who takes care of you?

Randomly, I recall something Jhanvi had asked me in Italy the night I told her about my family's past. I hadn't caught her meaning then.

Tonight, I do.

. . . ∞ . ∞ . ∞ . ∞. . .

          Punching the code to unlock the front door, we walk in past the foyer and the living room in the distance comes into view. Most of the adults are on the couch with dad pacing back and forth.

Khushi says to him, "Arnav, just sit. There could be a number of reasons why they aren't answering. They'll call back."

He shakes his head, his phone glued to his ear. "No, I can just sense it. Something is wrong. It has to be. Vikas and Mohit aren't answering my calls either, damn it."

They left us at the car, to head back to the outhouse where most of the security staff and equipment is set up.

"Dad," I speak up to mark our presence. All eyes turn towards us.

Lavanya stands to cross the distance between us, "See, they must have been in the air. Explains why they didn't answer." Standing in front of us, she directs to me. "Kiddo, please stop giving us these types of surprises. You know how antsy he gets." She holds my elbow to lead me further inside when I stay in my spot. Probably finding that weird when I'd otherwise have followed, she turns to face me again.

I reach down to pull her in my arms. All the nerves , the control I have been commanding the entire night breaks loose.

"Aarav?" She is concerned for when was the last time I was this disturbed that I had hugged her so? Whenever I might have returned home after a long trip from another city or country, I would hug them all, yes, but with warmth to let them know I'd missed them.

Tonight, is different.

It isn't as simple as having missed them.

Seeing this reaction of mines, rest of our family walks up to us. Khushi stands next to Arshiya, asking her if something had happened, while dad is looking at me with a blank stare. As if deep down knowing what had happened but not wanting to accept it. My gaze travels to his right. Anjali mom. Parting from Lavanya, I cross the distance between us in one stride and hug her with such a tight grip that I think I might hurt her, but she doesn't once complain.

She is unresponsive at first, sensing my body language for a moment, before one hand rubs my back while the other pats my head. She whispers comforting words, telling me that everything is fine. That we were home and that no one was going to hurt us.

She knows there is only one thing in this world capable of rattling me to this extent.

It isn't until she sniffs and pulls back, wiping my cheeks, that I realize I am crying as well. These tears are not just reflective of the terrifying fear I had inside of me today, but also for her.

For her past. For everything she has survived. For everything she has endured.

I will never understand how she came to find the courage and kindness to raise me after what that man did to her. All I can do is make it count - make it worth something - every moment of my life. Every breath I take, I owe to her. Everything I am is an ode in her respect.

She shakes her head, "No more tears, Aarav. Never again. Least of all for that man. He does not deserve our fears or even our hatred."

Khushi puts her hand on my shoulder, calling for my attention. "Di is right, Aarav. I spent years being consumed by fear of him. You know that. We thought it was past us, but tonight, put it to rest finally. It's over."

"He's not dead." I argue. How can it ever be over? As long as he's out there, I'll always worry that he'll come back anytime and finish what he started tonight.

Anjali says, "Even if he dies without us knowing, you'll keep him alive if you keep that hatred in you for him. You have to let it go. If you continue to let him affect you, he wins it all."

Dad speaks up for the first time, but it's directed to Arshiya rather than me. "Did he touch you?"

She shakes her head, assuring him at once. "No, dad. No. Not me or Annie."

His eyes shut for a second as if in a silent prayer of relief. Then, he steps forward to pull them both in for a group hug. He has them both in a tight grip to rest his demons. Normally, Arshiya would whine for the heck of it when we hug her tightly that we are going to break her delicate bones, suffocate her, and along the lines, but tonight, she takes it readily as if needing that bone crushing hug now more than ever.

If I were him, I wouldn't want to let go either.

Every emotion he must have ever felt seeing his sister fight her demons are ripened within me tonight. I have always said I would do anything to keep Arshiya safe. I have been protective of her too, but up till tonight, it was a different kind of protective. I would be protective of her in the sense that I would pamper her to bits and make sure she stays out of trouble with our parents when she'll engage in one mischief or another to keep herself entertained. Then, I am cautious with her health - as is everyone else in the family given her history. The whole reason for having Mohit heading her security detail is to make sure her health wouldn't be compromised, and she doesn't overexert herself. Ninety percent of the time, he is there to be her chaperone rather than a bodyguard.

Protecting her from worldly harm never crossed our minds because even when we are in the front lines of media with being a part of this family and the business empire, she has always been kept out of the limelight. In this business world, we make rivals and they try to get back at us in boardroom meetings and tenders for projects. Not by going after families.

But tonight, that changes.

I don't know if I can rest easy with her or Annie... or anyone, really. Even if mom says not to give in to this fear, it'll be tough. It'll take some time when my natural instinct is to go to extremes when it comes to preventing anything as such from ever happening again.

Dad advises, "You have all had a long night. Sleep. We'll talk tomorrow." Even when the ladies want to be spared from having to relieve it. through us, he'll want to know the details.

. . . ∞ . ∞ . ∞ . ∞. . .

∞ author note ∞

And here's another chapter! Two more and then conclusion..?!

QOTC: What do  you think about Aarav's current state of mind?