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A SEMBLANCE OF TRANQUILLITY

"Hey, man?" Samuel lifted his head from the table, looking at Holland, who stood by the door. "I am done for the day. Want me to wait for you?"

"No, thanks. Go ahead."

"Are you sure you're okay? You've been like this ever since we came back from lunch. Did you fight with Kali?"

"No. I am just tired."

"You're sure."

"Yeah. I'll be out of here soon. I have a few files to look over and sort through."

"Okay. I'll see you."

"Good night."

Holland left, and Samuel looked around his office. It was getting late, and he promised Kali he'd be home early. He looked at his wedding ring, twisting it around his finger thoughtfully.

Today, it seemed he got through to Flora better than he did the first time they spoke. He had been hard, but only to finally get through to her that things weren't the same. He didn't want her holding on to hope and realise later that there was nothing to salvage. She would only be miserable like that.

Most of all, he didn't want her carrying any misplaced grudge against Kali.

It had been painful, and she didn't directly say she understood him, but he hoped this time she did. He hoped she'd return home and think about what he said. He wanted her to see that she had to put herself first, even if it meant leaving him behind. He wasn't waiting at the finish line for her. He won't be there because he made his choice. No matter how guilty he felt, he didn't regret it.

His phone rang. It was his father.

"Hello, Dad."

"Good evening, how are you?"

"I am fine. I was about to leave the office."

"Hectic day?"

"A little."

"Sorry to hear that. I called to check on you and ask if you have spoken with your siblings."

Samuel chuckled. "About their vacation birthday celebration? Yes. I have."

"One would think your sister getting older would make her planning less exuberant."

"She had ten years of simple birthdays in Germany. Give her this one year, she'd settle by the next one."

"If only. She seems to be enjoying this a lot. I am glad she is getting comfortable, though. It's nice to see her fit right in despite the years away."

"I know." Samuel got up from his desk and began packing up to leave. "How have you been?"

"Fine. Since the exhibition, I have had time to relax. I started a project here and there, but nothing too exhausting yet."

"Good."

"There has been something on my mind for a while. I wanted to talk to you about it."

"Okay? I hope nothing's wrong."

"No. It's about a conversation I overheard between you and Claudius at the exhibition."

"I can guess what that's about."

"I am sure you can. I didn't think I needed to speak to you about it, but I can't seem to help myself. I know you already know this, but you don't have to do anything your grandfather asks. Don't get me wrong. I'd love a grandchild and the opportunity to see you become a father. You'd make a great one. But I want you and Kali to want it, too. It has to be a decision between the two of you. What he wants doesn't matter when it comes to your life."

"I know that."

His father sighed with relief. "I know you know, Samuel, but I needed to say it. I don't want him to sink his claws into you or Kali. Your mother spends her life trying to please that man, and we've seen where that got her, where it got us. The last thing I want is for you to go down the same path."

"Thank you for worrying, but rest assured that I won't do anything against my will. Kali and I will make the decisions. Especially for our family's future."

"I am happy to hear that. I want you to take good care of yourself, alright?"

"I definitely will."

"Say hello to Kali for me."

"I'll do that, Dad."

"See you soon."

"I love you."

His father's greatest mission was that none of them ended up like their mother. It was a mix of duty and pain. Duty because he thought he owed it to them, as their father, to see that they lived their best life. Pain because the fact that he couldn't save his wife from herself plagued him. He couldn't seem to help the one person he tried so hard to protect.

The topic was still on Samuel's mind when he arrived home. Giovanna entertained herself with the television, barely tearing her eyes away to acknowledge him when he walked in. She managed a wave and muttering a greeting while she chewed on her gummy worm.

He left her to her movies and went up to his room. Kali was sound asleep, stretched out on the bed with her usual ensemble, cropped shirt and baggy shorts. She lay on the bed, head cradled by her right hand while her left rested on her laptop.

He scoffed. He dropped his bag quietly by the sofa before walking to the bed. He leaned over her, kissing her cheek softly. He pushed the laptop away from her fingers and kept on kissing her until she finally stirred. It took a moment for her to find herself, but once she did, she was groaning into the bed.

"I was enjoying that."

"I am sure. What were you working on?"

Her eyes flashed, and all traces of sleep dashed as she jumped up. She searched for her laptop, checking the email she had been writing before exhaling in relief.

"I fell asleep writing."

"That much was obvious."

She closed the laptop and set it aside on the night table. "Did you just get back?"

"Not long ago." He stretched out on his bed and dragged her to his side. "My dad called before I left the office. He said I should say hello to you."

"I should call him. It's been a while since I did."

"He'd like that."

"And Flora?"

"We talked a little after you left. I tried to get through to her, and I hope I did. I want her to be happy. She has already suffered enough through all this. She doesn't deserve to be tormented by a guilt she has no reason to carry."

"Are you okay?"

He kissed the top of her head and nodded. "I am."

Today, he realised all his love was for one woman. The one in his arms. Guilt for feeling like he betrayed Flora was what kept the love he had for her alive in him. He realised it after the calm that washed over him when the chaos of her confessing, she knew the truth passed. It was freedom from everything.

He cared for her still, and that wouldn't change. But his life was different.

He only had one thing left for him to have his life complete.

He caressed Kali's face as he thought of the last lie he was holding in his heart. The truth about his father.

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