"Stating the obvious here but this is a bad idea," I drag my feet behind an ecstatic Blair. She shoots me a glare over her shoulder while Taylor gives my arm a gentle squeeze in support. "It's not even our own schools party, isn't that just a bad sign in general?"

"Relax. I was invited by Julia," She walks backwards momentarily, not caring that she's in heels or potentially at risk of stacking it. "You know who she is. She used to be on the dance team with us, she moved about a month after you quit."

I purse my lips at the mention of an ex teammate of mine. The main reason I'm capable of being friends with girls like Blair and Taylor is because I was once in the same league as them. I used to be in the inner circle until I dropped off the radar after quitting the dance team.

Quitting was a personal decision that I constantly think back to. I wonder if I stuck with it would I have had so much trouble with my anxiety, would dance actually help me or was I right from quitting as a prevention from what could've been worse.

Even though I quit Blair stuck with it since freshman year and is currently the captain of the team. Sometimes she drags me along to practice - in an attempt to get me to realize what I'm missing- but proves futile when I walk out. It feels like I'm torturing myself by watching and I can't stick around when it feels like a part of me is missing.

I exhale and give a false smile to Taylor who rushes to catch up to Blair. Both girls are stopped at the door by someone holding a bowl, the lights inside are purple and those that go past can be seen with paint covering their skin. My mouth gets dry and I go to walk back to the car when Blair latches onto our arms.

"In honor of our birthday girls favourite era it's themed a black light party. There's a body paint station set up in the dining room to the right," We're instructed as she holds out the bowl to us with a cheshire like grin. "Also to celebrate her new found relationship status she's trying to play matchmaker. Take one depending on your status."

"This is a really cool idea," Blair takes a green one, Taylor sharing a look with me that says otherwise. "I haven't seen Julia in a while. I'm Blair, this is Taylor and Kira."

I stare at the glowsticks in the bowl, tempted to take a red to avoid being approached. Although that decision is made for me when Blair latches the one she had in her hands around my wrist grabbing another one for herself.

"Oh! Julia said she wants to catch up with you at some point tonight. Last time I saw her she was upstairs playing pool." I shove my hands into my jacket pockets while reluctantly following the girls inside.

Blair's eyes constantly watch me to make sure I don't run, it's scary how well she knows me. Linking pinkies with me she pulls me along the hallway with Taylor following. I winch when someone bumps my shoulder, the orange paint rubbing off of them and onto my denim jacket.

I curse under my breath, breaking the chain when we reach the kitchen that's lit dimly in contrast to the complete blackout through the house. Pulling my jacket off I drape it over my arm and take a cup from the stack in the middle of the island. While Blair goes straight for a mixed drink I stick to the simplistic coke for the night having nominated myself as the designated driver.

I take a sip and leaned against the counter when I spot the birthday girl. A bright smile is pulled onto her face as she emits nothing but happiness. Still the same Julia I knew. Out of all the girls on the dance team she was the only one that didn't treat me poorly once I quit, the others would make jokes and personally isolate me.

More out of fear that I would expose their secrets or patterns of habit. I wouldn't do that to them. But girls minds work over time at possibilities that aren't actually a threat. I'm not a threat to anyone because I wouldn't have the spine to back it up.

Unless it involved something I believed in -excluding the obvious friends and family- then I could quite easily chanel my fathers assertive personality traits. Other then that, I take after my mother in her passive and reserved personality. You could almost say they're identical which is terrifying to hear.

"Hey! Thank you for coming," She hugs Blair who still manages to hug her while taking a drink at the same time. When the two break away her smile seems to brighten doing a double take at me. "Kira? Oh my god! I haven't seen you ages, your hair's grown back."

After giving me a hug she twirls the tips of my hair around her fingers with a nod. "Yeah. It's been two years I guess."

I have to raise my voice in order to get over the EDM music blasting through the house. The bass is in sync with my heart rate and the force of it seems almost suffocating around my throat. I push the feeling away and force a smile for the sake of not being questioned. Although my luck doesn't seem to be that great at the moment.

"You look great! You almost seem like you're back to normal since last time," The alcohol in her system doesn't hold any restraint to her words. "I'm glad that you're better now."

My smile slips completely and I glance at the girls who seem just as shocked by her words. I can feel the tears pricking at the corner of my eyes as I force a hand through my hair, seeking the comfort of my ring that I don't have on me. Wetting my lips, I tilt my head to the side and question her against my better judgement.

"What do you mean better now?" She giggles, leaning on the counter opposite me.

"You know what I mean! You completely went off the rails," Julia shrugs, taking a drink from her cup before continuing. "Quitting the dance team, cutting your hair, only talking to these two, lower attendance- are you even a senior?"

The weight in my chest amplifies as I nodded with a smile that has cracks in it. "That isn't going off the rails."

"I'm pretty sure it is. Half the girls were expecting you to get arrested-"

"Julia. I think that's enough," Taylor cuts in and my eyes fall on Blair who is shockingly quiet. "The party is pretty-"

"Is that true?" I ask Blair, ignoring Taylor's attempt at changing the subject. "Did everyone think that I was going to get arrested?"

She hesitates in answering. "Not necessarily."

"So that's a yes," I swipe my tongue over my lips, looking around the kitchen only for the figures to blur. "I'm glad that you didn't tell me this."

My fingers curl around the counter to keep balance when everything seems to tilt. I close my eyes for a second and blink furiously after to see if the figures are actually humans now. Although there's some improvement the fact someone's eyes are burning into me, spikes the feeling up to unbearable.

"I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to react like this."

Blair raises her voice, drawing more attention to the situation. I shake my head and push off the counter. "You didn't want me to react? You should have told me then when I was still 'off the rails' not when I'm finally getting better."

"Face it you aren't getting better."

"Go fuck yourself."

Glaring I move to leave and keep walking when she tries to bait an argument. "Run away like you always do when things get real!"

My eyes are threatening to leak tears while I almost blindly search for somewhere not occupied. I manage to get into a room that's nearly empty apart from a couple making out when my eyes land on the small paint tins occupying majority of the table.

I picked one up and tilt it in my hand slightly, watching the green paint move as well. Occasionally it will ripple from the music but somehow it's soothing me. It's pretty in the dark light and I find myself sitting down and taking a paintbrush.

After carefully constructing a pattern on my right hand I feel satisfied by its creation. I essentially made one of the eighties gloves that are looped around one finger that go up to your elbows. Except mine just goes to my wrist.

"That looks really good." I almost knocked my drink that's resting directly in my eyesight.

I look up although I can't really make out any identifying features because he doesn't have any of the paint on. Occasionally the strobe lights will flicker in here and I know he's tall with light hair and a muscular build.

"Thank you!" I basically shouted over the music, taking my drink in an attempt to seem less awkward.

While I take a drink I half expect the guy to go away when he pulls a dining room chair closer before sitting down. I'm almost tempted to leave in order to avoid conversation until I see who it is - Rhys Adams.

"Do you think you could do one on me?" He leans forward in order to keep his voice from yelling.

I feel as if my mouths gone dry. Why is he talking to me? Maybe he doesn't recognize you. I can't smell the alcohol on his breathe though so that's ruled out. Against my better judgement I nod slowly, returning my cup back to the table and looking at the colours.

"Blue and green?" I ask, when I look back he's pulling off his jacket to reveal the white tee shirt underneath.

He smiles lazily. "Whatever you think looks best."

Nodding I pick up the paintbrush and dip it into the green. "What do you want me to draw?"

He moves closer than before placing his arm onto the wooden table. When his hand places on my knee he leans closer to whisper in my ear. "I don't really care what you draw. I'm sure anything will look great."

With that I start the design on his arm. I try to keep myself focused but the fact his hand is still on my knee proves to be a distraction. Halfway through the dragon I end up shifting in my seat, essentially knocking his hand off when I face the table.  

I tilt his arm in order to wrap the tail around when he leans closer once again. "I want you to stay away from my brother."

"What!" I shriek, almost ruining the tail by looking at Rhys but quickly regain composure. "What are you talking about?"

He just chuckles, shaking his head in the slightest. "Nate needs to have friends his own age, not ones that are going to leave next year. I'm sure you're a sweet girl and I'm thankful for what you did for him but I want you to stay away, ignore him if you have to."

"Why should I listen to you?" I risk the words that were on the tip of my tongue. Despite the rumours, I doubt he would actually hurt me. I hope not at least. The next words are more thought out and hopefully won't end up with someone else hating me. "He'll still have his boyfriend."

Rhys' eyes widen and his jaw locks in the slightest. "How do you know that he's bisexual?"

"What do you mean how do I know?" I finish the tail with a flick and place the brush down.

"It isn't something that is casually brought up in conversation." I furrow my eyebrows at him until it clicks into place.

His eyes watch the facial expression change and I grab my drink, standing to leave. "I have to go."

"And get yelled at by your friend again?" He asks, leaning back in the chair with a challenging smirk as my facial expression falls. "Yeah. I heard that but I think I'm the only one sober enough to remember it. So why don't you sit down and tell me why my idiotic brother told you of all people."

I nervously licked my lips and put one hand on the back of the chair. Am I really about to tell him this? Nate should have told him the truth about the fight and I wouldn't be stuck in this predicament. I lean down slightly so we're at an even face level.

"That's why he got beat up by Brian because he saw him and his boyfriend holding hands," Rhys' facial expression slips into a neutral one that doesn't reveal how he's feeling. "I stepped in because your brother was seconds away from getting severely hurt by calling him out for being a homophobe. I don't think many people heard it or connected the dots like I did but that's how I found out."

"Nate was running his mouth," Rhys finally shows a look of annoyance. "You should've just let him deal with it rather than getting involved and getting a bruise yourself."

I scoff, shaking my head. "Oh trust me, next time I won't draw any unnecessary drama to my life. I don't need it."

I push off and walk away, his hand clamps down on my wrist to stop me while getting to his feet. "What do you mean unnecessary drama?"

Rhys' question is filled with curiosity and wonder. I run my tongue over my teeth knowing that once again I've said too much. I tug my wrist in an attempt to get him to let go but it only tightens. Inhaling through my teeth I finally make eye contact with him.

"Forget I said anything," I fake a smile, hoping it's better than the ones I did earlier. "Let me go, please."

He stares for what feels like hours before letting go of my wrist. I take a slow step back, his eyes burning holes into me like he's scrutinizing me for everything. Once I finally snap out of it, I maneuver my way through the people and towards the staircase hoping that I can find some kind of peace from this chaotic night.

God knows I need it.