THANK YOU FOR 2.2K FOLLOWERS OMG

The same warnings as the first part apply.

A few weeks had passed and Dan hadn't changed much at all. He still flinched whenever I moved too close to him and I often had to hold him as he cried. His bruises had faded but the memories hadn't. The police had opened a case to try and find the man who had done it, without much luck. Dan's descriptions were vague as it had been dark and he had been in too much shock to notice the man's physical appearance. Poor Dan was petrified whenever he left the house, insisting on gripping onto my hand the whole time. Fans seeing the loving gesture was the last thing on his mind, his fear making him forget about that particular worry.

Dan had started therapy. He made me wait for him outside and he'd always go quiet for a few hours after. We'd get home and I'd hold him close, whispering sweet nothings just to raise his mood again. His smile became a rare artefact in our house, only showing up in the form of a ghost once in a blue moon. He had ceased to upload and fans were beginning to get worried but the man didn't even bother to scroll through Twitter.

VidCon was coming up and Dan was insisting he'd be okay to go. I was doubtful but he promised to never leave my sight. Before we knew it, we had flown to America and we were standing in a room, meeting fans. Dan was really tense as he waved at a couple of people and he didn't seem bothered when the first girl only gave me a hug. I noticed he flinched when the girl wrapped her arms around us for the photo but he didn't seem too upset or anything. Quite a few groups had met us and Dan was already getting tired. People left and he wiped his sweat-ridden forehead, taking a sip of his water bottle. I anxiously glanced at him but, before I could ask if he was okay, another group entered the room.

A girl immediately hugged me tightly and I grinned, hugging back. She did the same to Dan and he started to shake as soon as she touched him. "Are you alright?" The boy who had come with the girl asked after releasing Dan from a hug and the man nodded. We then posed for the photo and they left.

"I need to go to the toilet." Dan muttered, abruptly running out of the room. I quickly followed him to the bathrooms, aware he didn't need to go to the toilet at all. I grabbed his hand before he could lock himself in a stall but he pulled away.

"We can cancel the meet up. If we tell the fans you're sick, they'll understand." My voice was soft because I was so afraid Dan was going to have another panic attack. Those were a regular occurrence in our lives but it didn't make me detest them any less. You'd think you'd get used to them after a while or, at least, they'd become more bearable but they didn't. If anything they got worse.

"I can't let them down... I need to man up and stop acting so pathetic." He pulled at his hair, closing his eyes tightly as he mentally beat himself up.

"Love, you're not pathetic. You're okay. Did you take your medication this morning?"

"Yes because drugs keep me going. I can't even function on my own... fuck, I'm an idiot." Dan was crying so I pulled him into a hug. I had no idea exactly what was running though his head at that moment but, whatever it was, it was making him panic.

"No, you're not. You're amazing. You may not be perfect but who is? Perfect's boring anyway." I took his hand into mine, squeezing it reassuringly. "Breathe with me."

The room went silent and eventually his breathing was back to normal. Once he was ready, we headed back to the room where the meet up was being held. I spoke to someone working there and we ended up having to cancel the meet up. We told the fans Dan was unwell and I took him home. We got back to our hotel room and I held him close, never wanting to let him go again. We couldn't even move to get dinner because he fell asleep with his head on my lap.

-

I made sure that I didn't rush Dan into anything. I pressed my lips against his and wrapped an arm around his neck, pulling him closer. His lips were chapped but they still felt soft against mine. He seemed okay so I dared lean back and kiss down his jaw. I made sure to glance up at him, waiting for him to nod in consent. When he did, I reached for the bottom of his shirt, pulling it over his head and revealing his bare chest. I pressed my lips against his neck but he pushed me away. He had tensed up so much that his body resembled a statue and he had covered his face with his hands in defence.

"Love?" I whispered, backing up so that our bodies were no longer pressed together. He let out a desperate cry so I frowned, wishing I could go back in time and change my movements. I should have known he wouldn't be ready.

"Please don't hurt me." Dan's voice was trembling so much that his words were hard to make out. It broke my heart into a million tiny pieces, especially since he thought I would hurt him. I loved him so much and I wouldn't even consider laying a hand on him in a negative way.

"I won't."

"Please. I don't want to do this. I can't- I can't-" Dan had backed up so his back was pressed against the wall. He wasn't really looking at me, more through me.

"That's okay. We don't need to," I bent down, picking up his shirt from where it had been discarded on the floor. I handed it over but he just flinched like I was about to hit him, dropping it straight back onto the floor. "Dan, listen to me. I love you and I would never hurt you. I don't want to do anything you don't want to do."

"No, no, no-" Dan was hyperventilating so I swallowed thickly, trying to calm myself down too- for his sake.

"Breathe. Inhale... Exhale..." It took a long time to get him back to grips with reality and, even then, he was still shaken up.

"I'm so sorry," He mumbled, standing up and rushing to the toilet. Then he was being sick and I was on my knees beside him, rubbing his back. He was still shirtless, having not accepted the shirt when I had tried to give it to him earlier but that didn't bother either of us. "It's not you, I promise. I just saw-"

"You don't need to explain yourself, Dan. I understand that you're not ready yet and I'm prepared to wait. Don't rush yourself because I know this isn't easy," He sniffed, bringing a trembling hand through his hair. "Are you done being sick? We can go lay in bed and watch a movie?"

"Sounds good to me." I took his hand and pulled him back up onto his feet. I guided him back to the bedroom and he sat down whilst I set up a movie. I got under the blanket next to him, smiling gently when he leant his head on my shoulder.

-

Dan's mental health improved but I wasn't sure he'd ever completely heal. It took a long time but eventually he became comfortable enough with me that we could go further than taking off each other's shirts without him having a panic attack. After the first intimate moment we shared, I was so immensely proud of him for making it that far. He was so brave, fighting his inner battles and surviving for so long. I was aware that it wasn't easy so it was amazing for him to do something like that with the memories that will forever plague him.

Although he seemed okay a lot of the time, he had his moments. There were still times when I had to hold him as he cried or comfort him whilst he had a panic attack. It hurt me that he would- most likely- never fully heal and go back to the man I knew before the party.

His bruises had faded quickly but his memories were there to stay.

I wish I could make them go away so he could go back to his confident, hyper self. I couldn't but that was okay because I had done everything I could possibly do to help him. I was patient, loving and constantly there for him. I was never going to leave.

I would always be there to distract him from the haunting memories. Always. Because I was in love with the man and all I could see of him was perfect.

can someone give me advice on how to get rid of a crush but I really like this boy who I seriously shouldn't