Warning: contains talk about mental health instability and substance abuse.

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Draco had left a few minutes after waking up. I had already been up working on my research for a couple of hours, running on my third cup of coffee. It seems that he sensed how focused I was and left to avoid bothering me.

And he was right about this, I could only work efficiently when my mood was up. It would last for a couple of days, then I would feel down again. I had been plagued with mood swings ever since I was little. I had no idea why, and psychiatrists had never agreed on a final diagnosis. BPD and bipolar disorder had been mentioned a few times but I did not tick all the boxes.

So I just kept on living how I could, medicating myself whenever needed with legal substances. Sometimes illegal ones would be used, although not too often. They seemed to worsen my mood swings, making me feel like I was about to explode, heightening every emotion.

But today was good. And the next couple days were too. But a week later, I was down again, on my way to the pub to meet the others after work. As I was struggling to walk through the snow covered streets of London, my mind wandered to Draco.

I knew he would be at the pub. We hadn't spoken since that evening but had shared a few glances during the week whenever the group would hang at the other's flat. I didn't mind the ambiguity, having gone over the phase of absolutely needing to label every one of my relationships a couple of years before.

The heat from inside the pub stung my face as I walked in, spotting the group straight away. It was a hard one to miss in all honesty: Blaise, Theo and Draco looked like straight up models. I glanced around, chuckling at the enamoured stares they were getting from people around the room.

I sat down next to Lydia, giving a small smile to everyone while I tried to figure out what the hell they were talking about. Something about sports which bore me the moment I understood. That's what my downs looked like, I would get bored so easily while being surrounded with people, mostly keeping to myself.

I waited a tiny bit feigning interest before heading towards the bar. I needed a drink if I wanted to be at least of pleasant company tonight. The place was packed and I found myself trying to wave to the barman, unsuccessfully. Being 5' had its perks, but being able to order quickly at the bar wasn't one of them. As my frustration was growing, someone slid in the spot next to me and got the barman's attention straight away. Ready to bark at them to wait their turn, I came face to face with Draco.

"What are you drinking?" I paused for a couple of seconds, taking in how handsome he was. He really, really was. Dressed in black, as always, which was oddly similar to how I also dressed. We truly looked like a couple of grown up emo kids who had just gotten out of a Skallywags gig. "Chloé?" Hearing him calling out my name got me out of my contemplative state.

"Oh er.. a lager I guess." I shrugged. He nodded before ordering while I was scanning the place. Blaise was giving me a long, knowing look. He knew. I knew he knew. I didn't know how exactly he knew. But he knew. He raised one of his eyebrows and I mouthed an innocent "what?" to him. He shook his head before whispering something to Theo, no doubt about me.

"There you go." Draco was handing me a shot filled with clear liquor while holding onto one himself. I gave him a questioning look while taking the glass. "Just looked like you needed one. I'll have them both if you don't want it." 

He gave me a nonchalant shrug while I bit my lip smirking. That was nice of him, I guess. It meant he was looking out for me. Or that I looked like utter shit. I preferred not to consider the latter.

He made a move to take back the drink, thinking my lack of answer meant I didn't want it. Understanding what he was doing I hurried to down the shot before slamming it down on the counter. "Donné c'est donné, repris c'est volé. [(a gift) given is given, if taken back it is stolen " He looked at me baffled for a second before chuckling slightly and downing his own shot. 

"Thanks, by the way. Next round is on me." He waved me off before we started heading back to our table. "No need." I nodded while promising myself that I would still do it. I hated feeling that I owed anything to people.