i'm sorry i've been on a hiatus the past months... here's a really long chapter, please forgive me?

Evangeline never thought she'd be having this conversation with her little sister.

Eva got herself dressed and went down the stairs to Celene's bedroom where she found her doing her Elite Boarding School homework. Eva was ready to lecture her on; one, how to properly speak to her, and two, how to keep secrets and not snitch on her own blood - it was because of Celene that Eva accidently spilled Alisha's secret the other time. Never did Evangeline guess that she would witness her sister fangirling and over none other than Zarek Black!

"But have you looked at him?" Celene gushed, her body a wobbly corpse as it fell on the much fluffier bed with nicer sheets - Hannah is really taking care of her, Eva rolled her eyes. "He's so hot. There's, like, no way you two haven't made out yet." Celene's pastel hazel eyes haunted Eva, turning deadly as it seized her up and down. "Seriously though, have you? You better start spilling your tea."

"Celene!"Eva blushed and looked around in fear, even though the two girls were home alone. "Don't talk like that, mom can be home any minute."

"Yeah, but that didn't stop you. I've seen you two, you were soo comfortable on the bed, with you wearing only a towel and him on top of you!" Celene accused, "I never took you for that type. That's disgusting, what will mom think?"

Eva took a deep breath to rid herself of the painful assumptions her own sister was making about her. "Exactly," she breathed out with as much cool nerves as she could, "Then why did you tell her about my encounter with him in the mall? That got me into a lot of trouble."

"It's not like you don't deserve it," Celene spat, making Eva physically flinch at the harsh words, "Actually, I'll let her know right now what profound things you two were going to do while she was away."

Celene headed to her desk to retrieve her phone, and before she could dial Hannah's number Eva slapped the phone away. It landed on the edge of the bed, a few centimeters from falling. Celene glared up at Eva. "What the hell?" she screeched, blond eyebrows knotted, "Why did you do that? You had no right."

Eva wasn't even sorry. "Why are you like this?" She had to ball her hands in order to contain the evil side of her brain that was currently listing 10 reasons why punching Celene in the face was the right thing to do. "We are sisters, Celene! Ever since you came back from your boarding school - no, ever since I can remember you have acted as if I'm your enemy. Do you hate me that much?"

Celene shrugged. "Yeah, pretty much."

Eva threw her dainty hands in the air. "But why? What have I ever done to you?"

"Because it was you who killed our sister!"

Eva stilled, blood freezing in veins.

"You're living your life as though nothing happened, but we'll never get over what you did - especially mom." Celene smiled at how a tear burst out of Eva's eye at the mention of Hannah. "Yeah, that's right, mom hates you and loves me and Jacob. Matter of a fact, we are her favorite twins. Do you know why? Because neither of us killed the other while we were in her uterus."

"Stop speaking as if I had done that on purpose - the doctors said that my twin could of died because of any reason." It couldn't possibly be her fault, right? Eva always avoided thinking so dangerously, especially about this topic, but Celene opened the gates of hell in Eva's mind.

Celene fake-pouted. "Lie to yourself so you won't feel guilty all you want, but that won't change the fact that mom despises you for it."

Eva had always wondered why her mom was so cold and affectionless towards her, and it seemed like Celene knew exactly why. What if she was blaming me for what happened? A lot of things started to get twisted and complicated inside her mind as thoughts rushed in and out.

"Awe, are you going to cry?" Celene smirked, enjoying her own blood's misery.

"I don't understand why mom hates me so much..." Eva's voice broke as tears rolled down her freckled cheeks. "It's like losing one family member is not enough, so she decides to lose me as well."

"I bet mom will hate you even more when she finds out about that blond who was in your room, especially since I already told her what happened in the mall that day we went partying."

"Please don't tell her," Eva wiped her tears and blocked the previous toxic thoughts away, planning on ignoring them like she had been doing the past seventeen years. "I'll do whatever you want."

It was a miracle Hannah hadn't locked Zarek in jail with a restraining order, assigned bodyguards for Eva, and shipped her the furthest away from him when she knew it was him who cut her hair. Hannah held back before for her daughter's sake, and Eva wasn't about to try her chances again.

Celene picked up her thrown phone and handed it to Eva. "I want you to give me his number."

"What?" The list of 10 reasons why punching Celene in the face was the right thing to do never sounded more appealing. "Just tell me why? You don't even know how he's like."

"I have an idea how he's like, I've seen him a couple of times." Celene blushed as she recited those times she saw him. "I saw him in the mall when he was assaulting you, and then that same night at the party I was in when he punched some dude. Both times he was very violent - it was so hot! Then today I saw him in your room and he was so sentimental, which automatically means he's the perfect guy for me."

"How does that make any sense?" Eva was both jealous and concerned. "Forget about it, it's not happening."

Celene squinted her eyelined eyes. "Why? Is he your boyfriend or something?"

"W-what? Of course not."

"Figured, you can't keep up with him anyways."

Eva stared at her daring sister. "What does that suppose to mean?"

Celene rolled her eyes and gave her the death stare. "Are you gonna give me his number or should I get mom involved?"

"What will mom think of you, huh?" Eva weakly stated, "Don't you think she'll be dissapointed?"

"Between me and you, who do you think she's going to believe? and who do you think has it worse?" Celene was bored at this point. "Now, number please."

"I don't have it," Eva lied, "You said it, I can't keep up with him so why would he give me his number, right? Why would he even be interested in me?" Real insecurities kicking in to reinforce my statement.

"Ugh, damn it!" Celene ruffled the top of her head, getting the blond hair over her face. "Fine, can you at least tell me his name?"

Eva was merely concerned at this point. "Why do you care so much?"

Celene tapped on her screen and then glued the phone to her ears.

"Okay, fine, I'll tell you." Eva's tensed muscles relaxed when Celene hang up. "His name is Zarek."

"Hmm, Zarek?" Celene blushed again, "What an interesting name, it totally suits him."

Eva ignored whatever worry over her sister - no way she would get herself involved with Zarek, right? "I also came here to talk to you about the way you walked into my room. That was disrespectful, maybe you should knock next time?"

"I do whatever I want," Celene gave her the blank stare that said I'm a sociopath and I want to rip your eyeballs out. "Now get the hell out of my room."

I'm being bullied by my little sister - wonderful!

Ashton's blue eyes gleamed. "You look gorgeous."

Is he lying to me? Eva was wearing her usual combo of a sweatshirt and jeans, her short hair was naturally straight, and her face was makeupless. "Thanks," she said dryly.

"It's time to order," He picked up the menu and took a deep breath, a mischievous smile playing around his lips. "Let me guess, you want the strawberry milkshake?"

Eva rolled her eyes as she pushed Ashton's enthusiasm away. "Sure, I'll have whatever."

He winked and got up. "Okay then, I'll go and order. Be right back."

"Okaaay..." Eva huffed and palmed her cheeks, looking around The Regular Ice Cream Shop. She didn't know how to break the bad news to Ashton, it was the only reason why she agreed to see him in the first place. He must think I agreed because I wanted to make up for ditching him at Ryan's birthday party, poor him, he has no idea what's coming his way.

He came back a few minutes later with the drinks and a plate of strawberry shortcake. "Here," He sat on the table and placed the said plate and the strawberry milkshake in front of Eva, while he had a sophisticated mug of black coffee. "I took the liberty of getting that dessert for you. I immediately thought of you when I saw it. You also look like you need some."

Eva ignored his snarky comment and focused on the fact that he paid for her food. It was a sensitive topic for her, but Ashton insisted and she didn't want to reject him just yet. She took a deep breath and tried looking him straight in the eye. "Do you know why I came today?"

"Yes, sort of," He smiled, hand itching the back of his orange hair.

"I'm here to tell you that this between us has to end."

Ashton's beaming smile dropped in a millisecond. "Wait... are you breaking up with me?"

Eva was internally panicking - this is all so ridiculous! - but she kept a stern face. "Well yes, but actually no because you're not my real boyfriend. You're my pretend boyfriend, remember?"

Ashton kept staring at her, his poor brain still unable to process what happened. He blinked three times before he croaked out; "But why?"

Eva threaded her fingers together, fighting the urge of tucking her nonexistent hair behind her ears. "I spoke with Wendy today, and she told me what happened in Ryan's birthday party after I left. You guys had some fun?"

"That was some harmless fun, it only happened because I was bored without you!" he exasperated, losing his cool demeanor for the first time. "You shouldn't get jealous over her, dear. After all, she's not the one I call my girlfriend."

It felt wrong to be called someone's girlfriend especially since she decided she wouldn't date until marriage, but like everything else, she decided to ignore it. "I think you should." Eva dodged his gaze, it being too intense for fragile little her. "She really likes you and I don't want to ruin her chances with you. I'd hate myself if I ever did that."

Ashton shook his head and looked away. "Dear god, she's breaking up with me over someone I don't even like..."

"That's just half of it," Eva took a deep breath and said the next words with her eyes closed shut. "I saw Zarek today and he told me that he's over me so the plan is automatically off."

"You should've said that from the start," Ashton's bitter tone didn't encourage Evangeline to open her eyes at all. "Yeah, he's over you, now that you have a boyfriend and because the plan is working. If you call it off now, don't you think that'll be suspicious?"

Eva opened her hazel eyes slowly, instincts wary and sort of convinced. "Yeah, I suppose."

"Anyways," Ashton broke into a fun grin that eased up Eva's nerves but also worried her how fast he changed colors. "Tell me, what did you get the twins for their birthday?"

She cringed - a kiss for Raven and a music album for Ryan that I forgot to give him. "Ugh, don't remind me. I'd rather not talk about it."

"You too?" He laughed. "I don't know what's your scenario, but for me I think that showing up with you caused me to leave with my present."

"Oh no, what was it?"

"It was a collage of pictures of us three over the years."

"They must hate us, I feel so bad!" Eva looked at Ashton in the eye. "See? That's another reason why we should call this plan off. I don't want to hurt other people's feelings or ruin friendships."

"He has every right to crush on you, Eva, he couldn't have made a better choice, but that does not mean he must interfere with your own life choices." Ashton took a deep breath and killed Eva with those clear blue eyes. "Why do I feel like you're regretting this plan? This isn't a forced relationship, you can call it off whenever you want. Just know that that has major consequences."

He had said it so seriously that it almost sounded like a threat. Eva was so baffled at the seriousness of the situation. "But... but we are not even real."

"Yeah I know, but I sure as hell want it to be." Eva had to do a double take to make sure she heard him right. "I really like you and I want to have a fair shot with you now that Zarek is finally out of the picture."

Eva was so shocked she had no idea how to react other than look down and munch on the strawberry shortcake.

Ashton stared at her after one bite, two bites, and three bites was when he got the hint. He picked up his mug of black coffee and sipped it, his facial expressions so serious it was bordering creepy. He didn't seem to be regretting his words or dissapointed by Eva's lack of reaction, he was just calm and collected. It was almost nerve-wracking to keep up with how cool he was.

The silence stretched even further to when they both finished their drinks and left the coffee shop. Neither of them uttered a word despite Eva's raging thoughts in her head - am I about to lose Ashton as well? She had lost every guy (and one girl; Raven) because they always seemed to catch feelings for her, and Ashton was about to join that list apparently. This must be the reason why he agreed to her ridiculous plan so easily. Of course it is, silly, no one agrees to become someone's pretend lover just like that! It seemed to be a necessity for Eva to lose everyone and break every relationship she built before she left for college.

Swamped in her thoughts like usual, Eva's brain enabled autopilot mode and she ended up following wherever direction Ashton chose; The donut central park. All the alarms went off in Eva's head - isn't this where Zarek said he saw mom and Jacob? Ashton sat down on one of the benches and started talking about something but Eva was too busy fetching her phone to hear him.

She typed out a panicked text to her sister; "Celene, is mom home?"

The reply was fast; "Yes she is, and I didn't tell her anything so calm down."

Eva didn't know that an eye roll could be texted until now, but at least her mom was home so there was no need to worry of being caught all alone with a boy in such a setting.

"Evangeline, are you listening?"

Evangeline... He pronounced her name differently than anyone else ever had, as if Ashton had his own unique accent, and that gave her fluttering butterflies for some odd reason. What's happening to me?

Eva shook her head, little threads of short hair brushing the back of her neck. She tucked her cracked phone away and sat next to the ginger boy. "Sorry, what were you saying?"

He offered her a toothy grin, his slender arms ruffling her short bangs. "You weren't listening, were you? I was asking you what you thought of my feelings for you."

A wave of intense shyness came over her
in what seemed like forever, tinting her freckled face in a deep blush while more butterflies raged inside her tummy. Eva didn't know whether it was due to the unexpected physical contact or due to the delicate question, either way it was caused by Ashton. Eva still didn't know what to make of that.

She was tongue-tied so she looked around her in the park, hoping something would inspire her on what to say. However, what she saw left her even more baffled - is that Hunter Adams?

There he was, the edgy player, in all his glory. His buzzcut grew a little along with his beard, giving him a five o'clock shadow that added a few years to his appearance. He was dressed in all black, making his pierce grey eyes more evident. Everything about him almost distracted Eva of who was with him; rather what.

It was the cutest, smallest, and most precious little puppy there was. The little animal was so adorable and lovely that it contrasted with Hunter's aesthetic. The dog must be a rescue, which was even more unbelievable - I didn't know Hunter Adams can take care of anything without killing it. The sensitive side Eva once witnessed of him did exist, after all, it wasn't just an act.

"Hello there," Ashton waved his pale hand in front of Eva's face. "Can I have your attention back, please?"

The blush returned to her face, hazel eyes averted. "Sorry, you were saying?"

Ashton facepalmed himself, a laugh escaping his pink lips. "I'm dying here to know what she thinks of me, and she's not even paying attention."

"I don't know what to think, to be honest." Eva spoke the truth, she liked Ashton but was it as friends or more?

All of Ashton's playfulness dropped. "You better make up your mind, because I'm sure Zarek would lash out if he found out the truth behind our relationship and finish what he started. Nobody would save you then."

Eva's mouth was hanging wide open. "Are you threatening me?"

"No, not at all," He smiled but it did nothing to reassure Eva. "I'm just stating a fact. I know Zarek longer than you, I've seen sides of him you'd be too scared to know of."

That 'fact' caused Eva to jolt up and take the situation on a deeper level of seriousness. She did appreciate Ashton by her side, and it was nice to talk with a fellow nerd with sophisticated words, but was it to the point of liking?

What if he gets angry when I reject him like Zarek did, and do something bad to me as well? She gasped, an even worse scenario crossing her mind - What if he conspires with everyone I rejected for their ultimate revenge? Those were farfetched situations, but so was Zarek luring her in an abandoned cafeteria to cut her hair, and Eva wasn't about to test her chances again. Besides, Ashton was leaving the country for college anyways in a few months, so how serious could they become?

"Okay, whatever," Eva breathed out, "I'll be with you."

His blue eyes sparkled. "Does that mean you like me too?"

"Yes." Eva couldn't help but blush, this my first time confessing my feelings.

"Yes what?" He wanted her to say it.

She rolled her hazel eyes, something stirring in the pit of her stomach. "I like you too."

"Oh god, she finally said it!" Ashton jumped to his feet and picked Eva up, twirling her in the air. "You just made me the happiest man alive, I promise you you won't regret this."

Eva still needed to get used to Ashton's sudden physical contacts, yet she couldn't help but glance over at Hunter. He was looking right at her, grey eyes so deadly that he looked straight out of a horror movie.

Ashton placed her down on her feet, a childish glint that was so much better than his usual composure was in his features. "I do more than just like you, but let's just stick with that for now so that we don't scare you away."

She ignored Hunter being a creep and focused on the situation with Ashton. "We?"

"Yes," he chuckled, "Me and my multiple personalities, one of which is extremely obsessed by the way."

She didn't know what it was, but Eva's face broke into a wide smile. She could see herself getting used to Ashton, she didn't know what the future held but she didn't mind it.

Ashton smiled back, his face dreamy and genuinely happy. "We're our first time, both fake and real."

She thought before that this was blossoming into a wonderful friendship, but now it was more. She didn't know what yet, but she knew that when the time was right she wouldn't mind even though it felt a bit like a forced relationship at times.

In the middle of the moment, it completely slipped her mind the consequences of her decision on the people around her - especially Wendy.

Celene reminds me so much of Billie Eilish.

also a random question; do you think the title is too much? should i change it? if yes, then what are your suggestions?

i've been procrastinating writing this book because i don't want it to be over and maybe because i'm a little lazy lol. only a few chapters are left, start the countdown...