YOONGI POV:

From the moment when (Y/N) goes eerily blank at the station to the entire drive home, she doesn't move. It's like she's trapped so deeply into herself, so far into her memories that she can't escape. But her eyes are wide and begging for some sort of help, someone to reach in and draw her out of this darkness, this terror she can't seem to rid herself from. And the look she has is haunted, plagued and it makes my soul tear apart with the sheer depth of agony they hold, her eyes are warm and soft but right now they're an endless void, an abyss- she's fallen in and needs a lifeline.

I sit next to her, too tightly wound up to focus on driving, Tae is behind the wheels but he's not faring much better, his skin has gone ashy, colourless and I can hear the way his throat violently bobs and the heaving rattling gasps of breaths he takes. Joon is sitting there trying to remain calm but I can see from the tendons that stick out and the thudding of his heart echoing in my ears like a drum that it's all a façade- a mask so none of us freak out. But it's too late for that.

I remember that tactile comfort grounds (Y/N). Helps her focus. Which is why our hands are so tightly intertwined together, they're almost melded. Her fingers squeeze my palm desperately, her grip is strong and unrelenting. Even though she's not moving, the iron grip she has gives me a semblance of hope that she's reaching out just as much we're leaning in, trying to help her.

Her right side is plastered to me, almost to the extent that she's on my lap, I feverishly hope and pray that she hasn't sunken so far into herself, lost herself to misery that we can't help her. the numbing void that is emanating from her end of the bond makes my own mind, soul and body feel crushed and useless, it's a chill that spreads through me like ice.
I pray and pray, to every god, every deity, anyone for her to be alright. She has to be. I can't see her falling into despair and grief. I can't see her become so inverted in herself that she loses connection with reality.
Please. Please. It's the only mantra that is repeating in my head over and over again.
----
I gently guide her out of the car, through the door trying and failing to keep my distress and panic at bay. Even though I'm one of the eldest, there is nothing that could've ever prepared me for this. It makes me want to curl up and cry, but someone needs to be strong.

The others bolt upright, no doubt that our emotions have bled into every crevice of the house and filled each particle of air. I worry for Jin hyung who will be overwhelmed, for Hobi who's energy might deplete rapidly, for Kookie who's ability will burn this memory into his mind like a branding iron. I worry for Joon who can see (Y/N)'s aura, see ours and is bearing the brunt of it, for Jiminie who would want to use his abilities but can't materialise anything that can bring (Y/N) out of this. I worry for Tae who has yet to say or do anything since he let out a guttural, wounded sound, sinking to his knees next to (Y/N) and hovering over her protectively. I can feel the bond straining with this new hurt and I hope it is strong enough to get us through this. That I can help them through this.

When Hobi rushes forward to kneel in front of her sitting on the couch, his eyes are sharp and focused. He quickly draws off her shoes, draws off her socks, cupping her feet in his hands, lips turned downwards even whilst he rubs at her feet tenderly, gently.
I realise with a start that he's using heat energy to keep her warm, to keep her from slipping further into shock. Jiminie has already materialised a soft, thick blanket and is wrapping it around her loosely- so she doesn't feel restricted.
Jin hyung and Kookie have sat themselves on either side of her, pressing closely into her sides and speaking to her in low murmurs, reassuring her that it's okay, everything will be fine, she's home, she's surrounded by people who love and care for her. She's safe. I can still hear the thudding of everyone's heartbeats, too quick and irregular, even whilst on the surface they're pushing their own worry aside to address the matter at hand immediately. To tend to our soulmate immediately. It's an automatic response.

Who would've thought that Yuna was the daughter of (Y/N)'s stepmother? That the reason there was so much hate and anger directed towards (Y/N) was because of the past. But it was misdirected and unjustified- Yuna didn't have the right to act this way. (Y/N) had suffered through years of abuse, mentally controlled and forced to watch her parents die. It was her stepmother who had been the person who ripped apart her family life, so Yuna's behaviour was toxic and uncalled for.
The anger I felt on (Y/N)'s behalf, on the fact she'd missed out on a normal childhood and at a normal life because of the selfish actions of someone else made me fume, my blood boil, it struck a hot streak of burning rage, cutting through the ice. It made me feel something apart from the void.

(Y/N) POV:

I felt oddly cut off, detached, as if all the strings holding me up had been suddenly cut off. I wanted to speak, wanted to reach out but I felt frozen. Felt as though I couldn't coordinate my mind and body and get myself to do anything other than sit there like an empty, hollow husk. I could feel Yoongi oppa's hand, gripped tightly at it. It was my lifeline. My only way of staying rooted to reality. I could distantly sense the others, could feel the bond as the only thing that existed within the shell I had become.
I can feel. Feel a warm thick fabric drape over me, can feel warm heat blossom from the hands that touch and rub gently at my feet, spread through my body. The sensation of slowly melting, slowly thawing. Two warm bodies press onto my either side. The warmth of something living.

I can hear. Voices that murmur to me in low tones, the words a soothing comforting lullaby. The words are a balm applied to my raw and shredded soul. They fill the air, like a humming sound. Not incessant but the type of humming someone does as they cradle you close. It slowly reaches in and tethers itself to my soul. Slowly but surely fixes itself in me and gently begins the process of guiding me out.
But no matter how hard I try, I feel trapped. As if my body is a prison that I can't escape. As if my mind is a cell with walls that close in rapidly.

The dam that holds back my memories breaks and like a flood they come rushing out. It's a constant, raging outburst. Fragments and shreds of memories, words and images come and swarm my mind.
----
Red lips fill my vision. Cruel. Malicious. Twisted into a false, imitated version of a smile.
"Isn't she just a doll? I'm going to love playing with her."
A large hand that presses against my throat, long red nails that press against my skin, in a reprimanding manner.
"Say the word. Say mommy. Come on pet, just once." The voice is soft but the promise of pain lingers behind, danger in the way she croons and eyes me with a predatory hunger.
Flaming heat that blossoms across my face, head spinning slightly.
"You just had to make me angry. Don't cry pet, you know mommy doesn't like it." The voice hisses.
"You're NOT my mum. You never will be!" a defiant voice shrieks, unafraid and bold.
----
The shriek echoes in my ears, I feel my lips tug slightly, pull out of the frozen state. There's a rush of energy, not from Hobi oppa but from within me.
It chips away at the solid statue that encases me.

I escaped. I escaped. No. I survived. I came out stronger. The young child I had been looks up at me in my mind's eye, face pale, blood running down her temple, eyes glittering and shining with defiance, with strength. The child me hadn't given up, so why should I?

Dae Hyeon. Greatness and honour.
Something my parents wished for me. To be great and to live with honour. She represented who I wanted to be. Someone who survived. Someone who moved on despite all she suffered and still triumphed. A phoenix who rose out of the ashes and was reborn.
I owed it to my parents to try with all I had, to live with all I had.

Help. Help me. I parted my lips, forced them to listen to me, I was in charge of my body.
"Help me." I rasped out. I felt the people surrounding me turn. Felt the bond violently convulse and suddenly burn brighter.
I had reached my hand out, I hoped someone would grasp it and pull me out.

JIN POV:

I jerked around when I heard the almost inaudible plea. Turned to frantically examine (Y/N), eyes roving over trying to see any changes.
I hadn't imagined it. She had spoken. Some while ago her lips had twitched, as though she was trying to open them to speak.
I was sure she had spoken. I wasn't imagining it.

Kookie on the other side was also staring agape, the others had twisted around from their places on the carpet, all hovering near her. it wasn't just me.
Help me, she had said. Had gotten out. She was asking for hope, for someone to reach in and help her.

But how?

A thought struck me. Jae. We needed Dae Hyeon's Jae. I was sure it was Jaebum, there was no-one else who fit the character so aptly. Ability to hear thoughts, knew (Y/N) since childhood, knew everything about her.
If there was anyone who could help us, it was him.

I grabbed my phone from the side and with a new found surge of determination called him.
I would do whatever it took to help her. Anything and everything.

JAEBUM POV:
I'm at home with Mark, cooking or trying to. Mark keeps distracting me, lingering hands or sweet words that drip out of his mouth and distract me. He's playing dirty. And he knows it, if his smug smiles and side glances are anything to go by.

After we've eaten, Mark is dressed and bundled up in a coat and scarf, bobble hat snugly fitting his head as he rolls his eyes at me and Jinyoung, primarily at him because he's the one doing the fussing.
"Jinyoung-ah, I'll be fine. I can't get cold like this. Besides it's the middle of spring." He complains.
Jinyoung lightly swats his arm, eyes narrowed warningly.
"It's been cold this week. And the forecast said it'll be really windy and maybe even rain." He fusses, making sure the scarf is protecting his neck from exposure to any of the elements.
He's acting like Mark is embarking on a voyage. A long and difficult one.
But I don't interfere. Jinyoung's ability allows him to connect with nature very deeply. And if he says it'll be cold, it'll be cold.

It's been mere minutes after Mark has left and Jinyoung has pulled me to lie my head on his lap when my phone rings. It's out of my reach so Jinyoung reaches over to grab it.

"Ah hello Jin hyung. How is everyone? I'd love to see (Y/N) sometime soon, and you all of course—" and then he suddenly stops, I feel his muscles tighten from under my head.
Then suddenly from Jinyoung a barrage of thoughts flood out. All mixed and jumbled and I can't sort them out straight away, but all of them swirl around a gaping hole, a hole that seeps out fear.

I bolt upright.
Jinyoung shoots me a worried look, listening to Jin hyung on the other end.
I bite my lip, worrying what is that's been spoken. It's not good. I gather that instantly.
"We'll hurry over hyung." Jinyoung says, voice sombre.
He hastens to his feet, hands reaching down to help me up.

He's rushing around, getting our jackets, softly helping me thread my arms through it, wounds a thick scarf around my neck, pulls a beanie onto my head. Then he's rushing to pull his own on haphazardly. I stop him and fix it for him, trying to ease the panic that's surging inside me and transmitting through the bond.
He grabs at my hands and stops them in their tracks, where they're fixing the lapels of his coat.

"Jaebum, we need to be strong. (Y/N) needs us." He whispers before leaning in to meet my lips in a soft reassuring caress. It's gentle and tender and full of worry. I can feel it. I lean into the touch like a man starved, trying to leech a semblance of calm from the kiss.
Our foreheads press together and I brace myself for what I'm going to find.
(Y/N) needs us. And there is no way we wouldn't hurry to her.
Our hands clutch each other's tightly as we step out of our house and hurry to her.
To the girl I'd found one cold winter's afternoon.

(THERE YOU HAVE IT! THERE'S A PANIC BUT THE CAVALRY ARE ON THERE WAY. THIS CHAPTER IS A MIX OF HURT, FLUFF AND ANGST. WHAT (Y/N) IS EXPERIENCING IS SOMETHING REALLY SIMILAR TO DISSOCIATION. WE'LL GET MORE INTO THAT NEXT CHAPTER. BUT NOW YOU KNOW THAT SHE'S TRYING TOO...TO GET HERSELF OUT OF IT. THIS SUDDEN SPIRAL SHE'S FALLEN INTO. LET'S SEE HOW EVERYONE FARES NEXT CHAPTER! LET ME KNOW MY LOVELIES HOW YOU FOUND IT. STAY SAFE!)

We are Bulletproof: The Eternal MV has been so emotional to watch. It fills me with pride and love to see how far they've come, how far they've run. They are that puzzle piece which completed me.

Let us be each other's shield, each other's support. When we break down, let's help each other up and build ourselves up again, to be bolder, stronger versions of the people we used to be.

Borahae! 💜💜💜
PurpleQueenie <3