This chapter contains emotional trauma. Please read with caution.

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''You have scars.''

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Draco didn't speak a word of what happened the other night. Three evenings, exactly as that one — had befallen.

Amelie made it a nightly routine, walking down to the kitchen around three in the morning, drinking water, and making sure that Draco had the blanket on him.

He felt as if he was dying inside every time she did. He wished that he could scare her, tell her to stop — or how much it hurt to hear her hum as she dragged the cover over his skin, tucking him in as she believed him to be asleep.

He loathed it, having her so close, feeling her breaths taste sweet on his lips, and breathing in her scent when he knew that she didn't remember them.

Amelie didn't recognize one single thing about the life they had together, and that drowned Draco to a tipping point from the inside.

She didn't speak much to him. Instead, she merely glanced at him when she found the opportunity to do so. It was as if she was ashamed — as if she knew that something was wrong, but she didn't say a thing.

That was strange to him, Amelie staying quiet. Even before he learned how gentle her heart was — she always spoke to him, and now she barely talked to Theodore.

She followed Theo everywhere he went, and she tried to keep up with the conversations being held when she was around but not more than that.

Draco was so worried for her, he wanted her to talk to him, to tell him what was on her mind, and he would help her — but nothing. He didn't fail to notice a thing about her. He studied her, even in her silent state.

He observed every detail there was to catch onto, how she was terrified of being touched, how her eyes constantly flickered in uncertainty, and how she hid behind Theodore at all times.

She made herself small again, tiny, invisible. She didn't want to be noticed, seen. She just wanted to be. It was the aftermath of her mentally being with Adrian.

Draco understood that. Still, it was torture to watch it. To look at her body jolting as someone spoke when she wasn't prepared, how she always moved away for everyone else to pass, but what hurt most of all,

What kept Draco up at night, in a heavy loss of sleep, was that he had no clue how to fix this. None of them did.

Theodore had tried with and without magic to help her gain her missing memories, but nothing seemed to be successful.

Amelie was simply lost in her own head.

That was the gravest loss in it all. Not that she didn't remember Draco and the love they held for one another. He could live with that, with the fact that she was no longer his Amelie but the forfeiture of herself.

Amelie had, during the year she and Draco were able to spend together, grown more than anyone ever could. He'd never seen anything like it.

She found herself in the espy of Draco. She was strong-minded, in complete control of herself after a lifetime of missing. She was cursed, but she was even more remarkable.

It was her to herself, and to see her lose that piece — to watch as she once again believed not to be worthy, not to be loved, not to earn her own being — was worse than any type of torture could ever be.

He could still see small glimpses of her — her eyes as they flashed in excitement or how she scrunched her nose as she listened. Her humming when she was focused on something so simple as walking.

Malfoy needed her back, not for himself but for her. He would love her regardless, at all times, but he craved for her to love herself. They all did.

Amelie sat on the couch, her spine pushed against the armrest, and her legs settled over Theodore's. He was reading her parts of his favorite quotes as always. Ever since she'd woken up — they did this at night, before going to bed.

It was soothing in the unknown to the both of them, simply doing something they once cherished, reading to the other.

Theo was avoiding it — the massive elephant in the room, talking to her about what happened and what led up to her losing her memories. Not that he didn't want to, he did, but because he couldn't push her further.

Keeping her in the Malfoy Manor when all she wanted was to go, lived to be hard enough. He felt guilty for holding her in the dark, but he wouldn't risk her well-being again. He couldn't, yet he needed to.

It had been days since her eyes peeled open after weeks of rest, and it was time — time to talk to her — time to tell her.

Amelie's brows furrowed as she caught Theodore quieting down, lowering the book from his hold and letting it rest on his chest, ''What are you—?''

''I need to talk to you,'' He mumbled, staring blankly at the fireplace in front of him. The burning flames glinted at his skin, ''I need us to talk about something, Amelie.''

Her jaws tensed as she felt a lump in the back of her throat. She knew that this was coming, she wasn't a fool, and the utter fact that Theodore didn't let her leave this house played in her mind.

Amelie grasped that it was more than just them being here, that something must have happened since she didn't recognize herself anymore.

She had wounds over her body that she didn't earn the memory of receiving. Her hair was different since she last stared at her own reflection, and she looked older. She noticed.

''About?'' She smiled, tilting her head to the side, ''What do you want us to talk about?'' Her note gentle, caring.

Theodore's neck snapped, and he propped himself up on the furniture, turning around to face her fully, ''I need to talk about what happened,'' He didn't waste a second, ''I need to tell you some things, and I don't want you to be scared.''

She frowned. A mantle of confusion coated her, "What do I have to be scared for?" She asked, startled by his severe looks.

He stilled in silence for a minute or two as her heartbeat rose to pound in her ears. She was terrified.

"Teddy—"

"I thought we agreed not to tell her," Draco's voice came unexpectedly from behind, causing them both to wince in the already rich tension.

Theodore cleared his throat nervously as his eyes flickered. Draco stood tall in the doorway. His shoulder leaned against the wood as his eyes narrowed. He was looking evilly at the brunet.

''I wasn't—''

''Tell me what?''

Quietness.

Neither of them said a word to her. Their eyes simply snapped between each other before Draco looked straight at her.

His eyelids battled the heavy feeling. It pained every nerve in his body to look at her, ''This doesn't concern you,'' Draco mumbled, coldly, ''And if Nott over here would've kept his mouth shut—''

''Don't blame this on me! We said we would tell her eventually, so why wait if—'' Theodore hushed at his own words. He couldn't speak like that when she heard him. It wasn't acceptable.

''Watch it,'' Draco threatened, ''Fucking watch—''

''You're in love with Draco, Amelie.''

Total silence again.

Malfoy breathed in harshly as his head shook, looking at the brunet with flaming rage. He could strangle him to death. Hell, how Theodore would suffer for doing this.

''You bloody fool,'' Draco stepped closer to him. His large hands balled into fists as it took everything of him, not to punch Theodore with force, ''Why would you say that?''

Theodore blinked slowly, shaking his head, ''How could you not?'' He sounded angry, betrayed almost, ''She has been awake for days, and we haven't told her anything. How does that make her feel? That she's forced to stay here with us when all she really wants is to go home to someone that's—''

''Don't,'' Malfoy gritted. His eyes drilled through Teddy's, ''Don't you dare do this to her right now,'' His skin fumed.

''Do what? Tell her the truth? She deserves to know. She doesn't remember anything, Draco! She deserves to know that her mother is alive and that you two loved—''

''I said, don't,'' Draco's voice shredded through the manor so loudly that it made Theo flinch. He didn't mean to come off as intimidating, and especially not in front of her.

''That isn't yours to tell, Nott.''

Theodore breathed heavily. His chest nearly exploded. His head wavered as he failed to catch the girl sitting on the couch behind him.

Her mouth tasted bone dry.

She sighed, shakingly. One trembling breath was all it took for Draco to snap his eyes to hers and watch as she dragged her knees up to her chest, her arms folded around them.

''Amelie—'' He whispered, swallowing all the doubt he felt. Perhaps it was time to tell her. Maybe this was it. Maybe he should just spit it out, tell her just how much he loved her and what she did because she loved him back.

The reason they were all fixed in this situation today — all because they loved each other too much, too deeply. That perhaps the world wasn't ready for them and all the shared feelings.

He couldn't.

Draco couldn't tell her that she was the reason for everything good in his life, that after seventeen miserable years on this earth, she managed to make the eighteenth count.

Amelie caused it all to be worth it because she was.

"Don't listen to him, Amelie. He's trying to get inside your head," Draco lied, feeling every word as it slipped out tormentingly, "He's lying. We don't—"

He could never finish that sentence. Even if it was for her sake, he could never say that he didn't love her and that she didn't love him.

"I'm sorry..." Theodore clocked back to reality, realizing what he'd done, "Amelie, I didn't mean—"

"No," She whispered, "What is that supposed to mean?" Her lips shaking, "Why would you say that my mother is alive?"

Theodore shut his eyes closed, regretting all the things he'd said. But, there was no going back from this. Her memories were missing indeed, but she wasn't stupid.

"And why would you say that I'm in love with Malfoy?" Her fingers knitted together, "I had this dream..." She spoke, quietly, to herself almost,

"What dream?" Draco's chin rose, gathering what was left of his strength, but she stayed hushed. Thinking about what it meant — what she imagined in her week of unconsciousness.

"What dream, Amelie?" He found a slight piece of hope in his own vocals. Perhaps it all wasn't for nothing, "Tell me about it."

She was scared. Both of them could tell.

"My mother... I had this dream of someone being pregnant and you..." Her eyes finally flickered to his, and if he could, he'd melt right there and then. She looked at him with a tiny ounce of familiarity.

She recognized him, but only for a second.

"I missed you..." Her voice breathy, "I think I dreamed that I missed you, but I can't remember why."

Malfoy had to pull himself together. Stand tall with his spine stretched. He couldn't show her just how much he'd missed her too.

"I just remember you... and something about your favorite book, but it's all...blurry and then—" Her head shook, wavy strands of her hair crossed her shoulders, "It's blank again, but it was a dream, right?"

He had missed her voice. Even if she spoke small words at dinner, as thank you and goodnight, he hadn't heard her speak full sentences since he found her in Adrian's house.

"It was a dream," She tried to convince herself, doubting her own memories. Her mind didn't cave. She was too traumatized.

"It had to be a dream because why would I miss you?" She asked, looking at him again.

Draco's sight grounded. His heart ached in symphony with the sparkling fire, "You wouldn't. You would never miss me."

She did. She did miss him. She missed him so much that it caused her own self to forget about him.

That flash of him — of them, in the back of her head, tore apart in the longing for him, if only she could reach it.

''Did I miss you, Malfoy?'' The question was unfiltered, and he knew that he'd be damned for answering it. He didn't want to do that to her. It would leave a gap — an endless hole of questions he could never answer.

''You did—'' Theodore slipped down on the sofa in front of her again, facing her fully with the pain of thousands on his features, ''You missed him, Amelie. It wasn't a dream.''

Amelie's hues widened, and her fingers clenched around each other. She tried to stay calm, not to let anything but her shallow breathing out. She knew that something had gone missing from her, but she didn't know what, but this,

This would be impossible. How could she miss someone that Adrian loathed? How could she do that to the boy she would spend the rest of her life with?

She couldn't.

If only she knew how wrong she was.

''How?'' Her eyes pleaded Theodore's, and his hand gripped hers, ''How could I—'' Her tone broke, in total confusion, ''I could never do that to Adrian—''

''Amelie—''

''Theodore, don't,'' Draco called out, the tips of his fingers scratching along his jawline, ''She didn't. She didn't miss me, and she's faithful to Adrian. That's how it has to be.''

It took all of him to say that, and he couldn't look at her anymore. His sight snapped to watch the fire burning in the fireplace, and he wished to burn too — anything would be better than this.

''You didn't—''

''But I did.''

Silence trickled them once more, utterly, completely.

No one knew what to say anymore.

''Why would you call me Amelie? You never called me Amelie before. You never stayed clear of me, you always hovered to annoy Adrian, and now, here I am with bruises, scars, and marks, and nothing makes sense anymore—''

Her blows ragged, ''I am supposed to be afraid of you. Adrian always told me to be scared of you because you could take everything from him, he said that you were dangerous—'' She paused, letting herself heave, ''Why am I not scared of you?''

Draco's lips pushed into a firm line. His eyes fluttered.

''I was scared of you, and now I'm not, so there has to be something more. Something you're not telling me because I can't—'' Her fingers flew to her head, hauling her hair back, ''I can't remember you, and it's like...''

''Like what?'' The hope within him soared again, ''What is it like, Amelie—''

''You don't call me Amelie!'' She was on the margin to tears, desperate to understand, ''You have never called me Amelie, only Avery and I—''

Her eyes sealed, holding herself from crying. Her skin shifted ashenly, and her throat hurt, ''I can feel you, but I can't. I'm just—'' She couldn't keep it in anymore.

She didn't grasp what was happening.

''I'm not scared of you, and that scares me because I was. I was so scared of you.''

Her hands combed through her hair in defeat, and her skin vibrated. Draco saw — watched how hurtful this was to her. How he wished he could take it all away.

Sometimes he wished he'd never looked for her when they fled to the cabin. He regretted doing so because she would've been fine. She would be safe, with Theodore and he could never have hurt her as he did now.

He felt so at fault. He destroyed the one good thing he had. The only thing he had, and he loathed himself for it.

Suppose he'd just let them be. If he wasn't selfish, perhaps she could've been happy. She would've found peace in the chaos, but she was his lighthouse in his mightiest storms.

They were so perfect for each other, so fitting into a puzzle of a desolate life.

He should've let her go. He should've saved her from himself and all the madness he'd brought her. She deserved much more. Still, she didn't want it.

Amelie could've left. She could've stayed away, but all she ever wanted since that stubborn, mouthful blond boy came into her life, like a cloudburst, pouring all the love she drained him off, over her — was to be with him.

Amelie's body shook violently as tears flooded across her colorless cheeks. Her vision became blurry, and she couldn't see anymore.

Not that it mattered to her whether she couldn't watch the two boys in front of her or not, her mind was drowning, and so was she.

The panic ripping through her with force turned overwhelming. She couldn't breathe properly. It was all too much — too hurtful.

She didn't understand. Not one bit of what they fought about was clear to her. The names spilling from their mouths and the information she didn't own a thought about turned her dizzy.

Her head clouded as she cried. She just wanted to understand. She wanted to know, but she couldn't. It didn't make sense.

Nothing was true anymore. Adrian would never have hurt her, not in her reality. She didn't know all the vile things he did and the sinful hands he had placed upon her body. She didn't remember.

Her eyes started to roll back in need of air as she sobbed. She couldn't speak. She couldn't ask for help. All she did was cry.

Her hands tugged at the roots of her hair as she caught Theodore's voice. He was calling her name, his hands yanked at her shoulders, his fingers stroked her cheeks, but she didn't feel it.

She couldn't feel a thing.

Her eyes squeezed shut, closing the truth out. She didn't remember how to handle the pain. Everything she learned and mastered during the past year faded from her mind.

"Amelie, please say something—" Theodore pleaded. He was on the edge of tears. Seeing her this way, breaking into pieces in front of him, broke him too.

"Nott, she needs to breathe," Draco mumbled, taking strides closer, but he halted feet away. He didn't want to upset her more than they already had, "Tell her to breathe. Take her hand and—"

Theodore didn't listen. He tried his own ways. Calling her name and touching her, but it didn't work. Draco knew that it wouldn't work.

He knew what to do, but he didn't want to push her. He didn't want to betray her space. It could harm her more.

Her heaving turned shallow, and Draco panicked. He couldn't stand it. He couldn't see her like this, knowing that he could save her.

"Hell," He breathed, shoving Theodore to the side as he kneeled beside the sofa. His face close to hers, "Amelie, I am going to touch you now."

He waited, half a second for her to answer him, to give him some sort of reassurance that he was allowed to do what he needed to do, but she didn't react. She just cried.

"Draco, what are you—?" Theo was scared, more than it. He didn't mean to upset her like this.

"Just get out!" Draco growled, wrapping his arms around her trembling body, and he lifted her close to his chest.

He didn't waste a moment. He walked fast, steadily with Amelie in his arms. He failed to take a misstep, not a delaying a second as her skin shook.

"Here," He mumbled, shoving his door wide open, but he didn't close it. He needed her to know that she could leave if she wanted to.

Draco rushed into his bathroom, turning on the shower as he kept her in his arms. It was cold, the icing steam that poured down onto both of them.

"Breathe," He whispered into her head, feeling as her fingers clawed into his shoulders, slowly fading back to reality, "The cold water helps, Amelie, do you feel it?"

Her chin trembled. Her teeth shattered together, but it did ease. Her flushed skin cooled, and her breathing hushed.

''I do—'' She gulped, holding onto him with all she had, ''I can feel it.''

A gush of peace rolled over them as the stains of frigid water hit the tile floor. It was just them, silently close to each other, for moments, and it hurt him because it felt like before.

Before it all went to hell.

Amelie nodded, her forehead against his chest as he let her feet down onto the ground, not letting go of her right away, fearful that she'd fall over due to her weak knees. He knew that — because he'd done this before.

''I used to—'' Draco swallowed his shaking breath, ''I did this for you once.''

His eyes blasted in pain as he stared into hers. The corner of his mouth bravingly arched in a curl. He was smiling shyly.

''You don't remember it anymore, but once—'' He huffed, ''For what feels like a lifetime ago, I helped you like I am now.''

The flash of confusion glimmering around her wide pupils nearly caused him to gulp. He didn't know how to tell her — without telling her too much.

He wanted to tell her everything, how he was hers and she was his, but he couldn't. That would be selfish — she wouldn't be able to handle it. She was so frail.

Still, all he wished for was to be selfish when it came to her. To steal her from the world and keep her to himself, to protect her from everything she never knew she'd need shelter from.

''How?'' She looked up at him, her skin drenched in pearls of the cold water, ''How did you help me?''

His eyes sealed for a second as he sought to handle the stinging pain in his chest. With a sharp inhale, he stared back at her, and he fell, over and over again.

He'd always fall for her.

''You—'' It was hard speaking about something so close to him. He couldn't forget that day even if he tried, ''You had a moment, like this one and I—''

He stilled, not saying a word as she studied him. Her hands slowly moved to his chest, gently placing her palms onto his soaked shirt, ''You have scars,'' She whispered, her eyes flickering, ''I have scars too.''

''I know you do,'' Draco spoke quietly, ''And I'd do anything to take them away for you.''

She smiled, gazing over the wet shirt as it smeared onto his skin, ''Did you give me any scars?''

Her question burnt within him, but he couldn't show it, ''I don't think I did,'' He felt guilty, ''I hope I didn't.''

Amelie nodded, slowly and her hands stayed on him, feeling how his muscles flexed against the palms of them, ''I don't think you did,'' She said as he peered down at her, watching the phase of emotions playing on her features, ''It wouldn't feel safe here if you hurt me.''

Draco's insides wavered, ''I could never hurt you.''

''I know,'' She kept that courageous smile of hers, ''You feel safe.''

Her neck arched, and her head tipped back to look up at him, meeting the grey eyes she wished she feared.

She was always told to be afraid of Malfoy, but she wasn't. She could never be scared of someone that felt so much like home to her.

Amelie shuddered, her body winced slightly as Draco's hand slowly moved up to her cheek, and he halted, nearly forgetting that she wasn't his to touch anymore.

''It's alright,'' Her fingers gripped his hand, still stretched in the air between them, and Draco flinched at that. Not once did he look away from her as she led his hand up to her jaw, ''It doesn't hurt when you touch me.''

Malfoy's blond hair fell messily and damp over his forehead as she noticed. Amelie couldn't help but smile wider. It looked ridiculous, yet more charming than she cared to admit, how the strands framed his already handsome face and how his eyes glistened.

''Tell me what you did for me when I was scared,'' Amelie hummed, suppressing the chilly stream of liquid pouring over her.

The panic stinging through her veins calmed by the large hand on her skin. Her chin tilted slightly, resting in his palm, and her eyes fell shut.

She looked peaceful.

''I don't—'' Draco gasped. The water stabbingly cold now, ''I don't know how to tell you.'' He admitted, disappointed in himself for ruining something so valuable.

''It's alright. You don't have to—''

''I want to,'' He hewed her off, desperately. He didn't wish to fail her more than he felt in charge of, ''I want to tell you, but I don't want you to be scared again.''

''Will you stay with me if I am?'' She questioned and her nose scrunched by the droplets.

Draco nodded, without hesitation, ''Of course I would.'' It wasn't even another option for him. He'd always stay with her, scared or not.

''Then I'm okay,'' She was so brave, even in the missing of her own memories — she still held courage like no other.

''I brought you down in the black lake, the one close to school,'' He admitted, a shred of hurt ripped through his voice, ''The water was cold, and it was raining,''

Amelie blinked quickly. Her skin shivered by the icy water as it flooded over her in his shower, ''This feels like rain...'' She breathed out in a whisper, her tone low, ''It's something with rain, isn't it? It's comforting.''

He could shatter into an infinity of pieces right there and then. It hurt.

''It really is something about rain,'' Draco's jaws gritted as her lower lip quivered.

If she only knew just how much it was about rain.

''I just know that I miss you...'' Amelie said, stilly, ''I can't see it, and I can't remember it, but I just know...''

Malfoy's touch moved over her cheek, holding her head in the palm of his hand, ''I don't care if you don't remember it here—'' He put pressure upon her skull, nodding comfortably at her, ''As long as you feel it...'' His fingers pathed over her neck, down her collarbones before halting on her chest, ''Here.''

He let his hand rest on where her heart was beating, ''I don't care if you don't remember me or anything we have done for each other as long as you feel it, that your heart beats with mine.''

It was a plea — Draco begging her to come back to him without actually speaking the words.

Amelie's sight flickered, and her head tipped, looking at the way his hand gently touched her skin, ''I don't know—''

''Shhh...'' Draco whispered, ''You don't have to say anything. Just know that my heart beats with yours, and that's enough for me.'' He let his fingers off her, taking a step back, ''You're alive. That's all I ever wished for.''

Her heart pounded, swelling in her ears, and the tears stung in her eyes as she watched him leave the shower. Amelie didn't know that this took a toll on him. She didn't know anything anymore, but she could feel it.

A strange sensation in her chest, and she wasn't scared. He made her feel safe even when she wasn't. It intrigued her, just like the first time. She was fragile and worn, but she was curious about everything that didn't seem to harm her.

She turned around, turning off the bitter water as she smiled. Never had the forgotten been so known.

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The art for this chapter is illustrated by @ dar.a_art (on Instagram and Tumblr)