Thomas stared at the merman in utter shock. More than he's ever felt before. "Who the fuck are you???" He asked.

"Name's Roger. Like Mr. Roger's neighborhood." The merman, Roger, said with a British accent. "What's your's?"

"Uh, I'm Thomas and this is......Ginger?" Thomas said, noticing Ginger acting weird. She was staring at Roger with gooey eyes.

"Hello, big boy." She said, swimming up to Roger. "Cool car. Your parents must be very proud."

"Oh, well, I do come from a wealthy family." Roger said. Thomas stared in annoyance and disgust.

"We'd LOVE to accept a ride from you, Roger." Ginger said with a flirtatious smile. "Don't we, Thomas?"

"Huh??" Thomas cried. "Does my opinion not matter here???"

"Come on, old guy." Roger said. "I don't mind giving you dudes a ride."

"WHY are you even staring at this dude all goo-goo eyed??" Thomas cried. "What about Patri-?!"

"He'd love for you to give us a ride." Ginger interrupted. "We both would."

"Excellent." Roger said. "Let's hit the road."

"No, we don't even know you!" Thomas argued. "We're not accepting a ride from a total-!"

"OKAAAAAAY, can I talk with my friend for a quick bit??" Ginger said loudly.

"I'll allow it, sweet thing." Roger said, making Ginger blush a complete shade of red. She nudged Thomas away from Roger for a bit.

"Come on, Mr. Calloway, you said we needed transportation!" Ginger said. "And, there it is! Transportation! You do want those reels and you wanna go home, don't you??"

"Yeah, but we don't even know this arrogant lunatic." Thomas whispered through gritted teeth. "We're not accepting a ride from this-!"

"Please??" Ginger pleaded.

"No." Thomas said.

"PLEASE????" Ginger continued begging.

".........Okay, fine!" Thomas gave in much to Ginger's joy. "But, he'd better get us there faster or we're walking!"

"Deal." Ginger said, already on the front seat of Roger's monster truck. Roger got on the front seat.

"We're waitin' for ya, old man!" Roger called out.

"I'm SICK of everyone calling me that!!" Thomas shouted, stomping towards the truck and climbing to the back seat.

"And, we're off!" Roger said, as he began to drive the truck.

The monster truck rode along the bumpy road and Thomas was sitting in the back with a grouchy face and his arms folded while Roger was driving and Ginger was admiring Roger's masculine body and caressing his strong arms.

"You must work out, like, alot!" Ginger smiled. "Cause you are one hunk of loooove."

I thought I told her not to say "like!!" Thomas thought angrily. He continued sitting in annoyance as Ginger went all lovey dovey towards Roger.

"Mind telling me what you're doing in Antrum Island?" Roger asked.

"None of your business!" Thomas snapped.

"Mr. Calloway, don't be rude." Ginger said, causing Thomas to grunt angrily to himself. "We're just looking for something that this guy here lost."

Excuse me?? Thomas thought, offended. You say that like it's MY fault!

"What did you lose, dude?" Roger asked.

".........Okay, fine, I lost a set of film reels that are cursed." Thomas sighed. "They killed a lot of people and I'm trying to make sure no one meets that fate ever again."

"...............Okay, is this dude high or something?" Roger asked Ginger. "Cause clearly, none of what he said makes an ounce of sense."

"You're the one who asked ME these dumbass questions, so DON'T go thinking that something's wrong with me!!" Thomas snapped.

"Jesus, man. You're a ticking time bomb." Roger said in shock. "You REALLY need to put out that fuse."

"What are you?! Confusious?! Plato?!? Jesus' fucking Wiseman?!!" Thomas screamed.

"Can you stop the truck for a sec, sweetie?" Ginger said to Roger. "I need to talk to Thomas privately."

"Whatever floats your boat, babe." Roger said to a blushing Ginger, as he stopped the truck.

"The hell's going on??" Thomas snapped. "Why are we-?! WHOA!" Ginger pulled him out to behind the truck.

"What are you DOING??" Ginger asked. "Trying to get us into trouble?? You're REALLY out of control!"

"Talk to your little boyfriend, Ginger! He has an utterly ARROGANT attitude!" Thomas snapped. "I don't wanna sit in a fucking car with a egocentric fuck as our driver!"

"You really need to chill out, dude!" Ginger cried. "None of this is doing you ANY good!"

"Well, excuse me for stating the obvious!" Thomas argued. "I just can't stand that guy's attitude!"

"Have you ever tried breathing exercises?" Ginger asked.

"Wha-?! This isn't about ME!" Thomas snapped. "This is about millions of lives that are at stake if we don't destroy those reels! We HAVE to get there without ANY distractions!"

"Exactly." Ginger said. "And getting there by car is, like, FREE from distractions! We'll get there quicker if we just stick with Roger."

"But, what if-?!"

"Come on, Thomas." Ginger said. "You wanna get those reels and leave the island, do you?"

"........Yes?" Thomas said. "But, I don't trust Roger. He could be a fucking delinquent for all we know."

"Just take deep breaths with me." Ginger said. "Come on. In........ Out....." She began to take deep breaths. "Come on, do it with me. In.... Out...." Reluctantly, Thomas joined her and began taking deep breaths.

"It's not working." Thomas sighed.

"Don't tell yourself that cause it won't if you think negative." Ginger said. "In.... Out...." Thomas continued taking deep breaths and telling himself in his head that it does help.

"In..." Thomas began to say. "Out..... Okay, I'm calm now."

"All right. Now, whenever you get mad, just do what we just did." Ginger said.

"But, wait." Thomas suddenly said. "Should I be taking anger management from someone like you after the way you talked to everyone...?"

"Come on, dudes." Roger said from the truck. "We ain't got all day!"

"In... Out..." Thomas began taking deep breaths as he and Ginger went back into the truck and drove off.

Meanwhile...

"Why are you kids standing there with hats on??" Patrick said to the South Park crew.

"Uh, because that's our thing?" Kyle said, as Stan continued fiddling with the vacuum. "Why aren't you wearing a shirt?"

"No, wait! Don't tell me!" Patrick said. "Oh, I know! You're throwing a slumber party! Pillow fiiight!!" He suddenly whacked Kyle across the face with a pillow.

"God fucking damnit, that hurt!!" Kyle shouted in rage, catching Stan's attention. "What the hell was THAT for?!?"

"Ha ha!!" Patrick guffawed. "Ha ha ha!" He suddenly whacked SpongeBob across the face with the pillow.

"Patrick? Why is that pillow hard as a rock?" SpongeBob asked.

"It's made entirely out of wood." Patrick said, pulling off the pillow sheet revealing a wooden roll.

"WHY do you have a pillow made of wood??" Kyle asked. "That doesn't make any sense!"

"Yeah, that's, like, SO dumb!" One of the mermaids, the green one, said. "No one uses a hard pillow!"

"Yeah, but we guys use hard penises whenever we're around folks like you." Eric said crudely.

"You fucking pervert!" Wendy shouted in rage, punching Eric's cage.

"Gah!!" Eric cried. "Back off, bitch!!" Sheila suddenly kicked his cage as well. "Knock it off, you selfish fucking bitches!" Eric cussed once again.

"Is he ALWAYS like this??" Wendy asked.

"You have no idea." Sheila said, rolling her eyes. "Anyway, how's everything going up there, Marsh?"

"Not good..." Stan said, catching everyone's attention.

"What's wrong now, boyo?" Mr. Krabs asked.

"While you guys were asleep, I looked everywhere for a power tower." Stan explained. "None of them worked cause, you know, we're underwater. I'm surprised this fuckin' vacuum works at all. I tried messing with the vacuum's on/off switch, but it still doesn't work."

"Can you explain it in a way Patrick will understand?" SpongeBob asked. "He has a hard time understanding......well, everything."

"Okay, I'll put it this way: We're stuck here forever." Stan said.

"Nooooooooo!!" Mr. Krabs cried. "Whyyyyyyyy?! Why, why, why????!!"

"Daaad, you're embarrassing me again!" Pearl cried.

"Can't you think about anyone other than yourself?!" Eric asked, prompting Pearl to kick his cage. "GAH!!" He cried.

"You should talk, fat boy!" Kyle said, kicking Eric's cage as well.

"Will you just let me out of here, bitch wad?!?" Eric argued.

"That's it!" Sheila yelled. "I ain't gonna sit here and listen to Eric here insulting me and swearing like a little brat! It's time that I invoke the potty mouth chip!"

Oh, fuck! Eric thought in fear.