WARNING: There is violence in this chapter. More so than usual. Oh, and you might want to listen to Pardon Me by Incubus for added effect.
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(junior year)

I didn't know how long I sat there on the bleachers, with my elbow on my knees and hands on my head. It was as if time was standing still.

Did that really happen?

The past couple of hours were such a blur that I was having a hard time letting it all sink in yet. It was so surreal. We were supposed to have a game tonight. It was supposed to be a good game, too. Tonight was supposed to be fucking fun.

I rubbed my face and straightened up, taking a deep breath. My eyes traveled to where the football building used to be. All I saw now was rubble.

Nothing about this was fun.

Adam was rushed to the hospital. At some point during all the chaos, the team left and went to the hospital to see how he was doing. My friends wanted to stay with me, but I wasn't in the mood for company. I even had to beg Snow to leave me alone for a while.

My phone vibrated. I pulled it out of my pocket, saw Kurt's face, and answered.

"Hey."

"It's not good, man," sighed Kurt. "I don't know much about the details but he won't be playing anytime soon - or at all."

I ran a hand through my head.

"Any news about the cause?" he asked.

My left hand balled up to a fist, while my jaw clenched.

"They ruled it as an accident," I answered with a low voice.

"I'm sensing a 'but' there."

"It doesn't feel like an accident, man." I let out an exasperated breath and looked up at the setting sky. "The fire department said it had something to do with a defective light bulb, reaching its limit and flaring up when it was turned on. And it all just spread from there."

"Where did they say it start?"

"The gym."

"Shit."

"Yeah."

Adam went to the gym and hit the lights, not knowing the outcome of that simple move. None of us even knew there was a faulty light bulb anywhere in the building. Sure, it was old and moldy. But it was taken care of - sorta.

"Figures," said Kurt. "I heard Adam saying he passed out and when he woke up, he was surrounded by fire and he couldn't move his legs."

"It just -" I pressed my lips in frustration. "Fuck, it just doesn't make sense. I don't think a 'defective light bulb' could cause that much damage, you know?"

"Well, a lit candle can burn a house down."

I rubbed my face again. "I dunno."

He was silent for a second, before saying, in the most serious tone I've ever heard from Kurt, "You really think someone did this?"

"Don't you?"

My guts had been screaming at me for the past hour, telling me this was no accident. I've always followed my instinct. But this time, it was hard as hell because I had nothing to go from. No leads whatsoever.

"Me? No idea. But Alfie . . ."

"Yeah?"

"Here, tell Oz what you saw before we left the school."

There was a shuffling noise, then Alfie's voice came from the other end.

"Yo."

"I'm listening."

"Look, man," he breathed out, sounding beat. I could clearly imagine him shaking his head. "I sure as hell don't wanna make assumptions based on a fucking smile, but," he paused to grunt, "the cocksucker's smirk rubs me the wrong way. Shit, that sounded weird."

"Hold up," I said. "Which cocksucker?"

"I ran into one of the basketball sissies earlier, the Asian one."

"Lawley?" I heard Frisco's faint voice from the background.

"Yeah, like I know," snorted Alfie. "Anyway, he gave me this creepy Heath-Ledger's-Joker grin. I mean, everybody else was giving me this pitiful look. But then there was him, smiling like he just won or something."

I stayed quiet, thinking it through.

It wouldn't really be surprising if the basketball team were behind this mess. They made it clear how much they hated us. They thought we were a menace. It could be that they were bottling it all up, and now it exploded to this.

Why would they go so far, though? Weren't they supposed to be the 'good guys'? Huh. I knew it was all an act. Good was overrated. Fucking pussies.

But seriously, did they have enough balls to do this?

That was it.

They had none so they couldn't simply man up and face us. Instead, they resorted to being pathetic bunch of shits and attacked us this way.

My heartbeat accelerated the more I thought about the possibility of this.

"I'll call you later," I told Alfie, before hanging up.

I got to my feet and rubbed my mouth, considering this. It would serve no one good if this stayed as an assumption. I had to make sure.

Taking a breath, I ran down the bleachers. With one last look across the field to the burned down building, I made my way back to the school. The basketball team was about to leave for their away game tonight. I'd have a word with them first.

On my way to their locker room, I passed by Snow. She was checking out the bulletin board. For what, I had no clue. I didn't want to waste time, so I pretended not to see her.

"Oz?"

Fuck, she saw me.

"Not now, babe," I merely said, walking ahead.

"Where are you going?" she asked, now following me.

Not many people were around the school at this time. The hallway was almost empty. But I was pretty sure the parking lot was still full of students talking about the latest disaster that happened to our school.

I didn't want an audience for this. I just wanted to find out the truth. Just one look, and I'd know if they were behind the fire or not. Guess I gotta thank my messed up family's genes for the gift of being a walking lie-detector.

"Oz, why are you heading to the . . ."

She was smart. I let her figure it out on her own.

"You don't think . . . ?"

I could practically see her putting the pieces of the puzzle together in her mind.

"No, there's no way. He wouldn't. They wouldn't."

"We'll see," I said quietly.

"Oz," called Snow firmly, grabbing my arm to stop me.

I halted. We were outside the basketball team's locker room, anyways. Snow stood in front of me and looked me in the eyes. I stared back at her, emotionless on the outside but flaming in the inside. Just one wrong move, and I'd flip.

If Scout and his team even had the slightest thing to do with why one of my boys was in the hospital right now, I'd make sure they fucking pay for it.

"It was an accident," she stated, genuinely believing it.

I didn't know what to believe.

"I don't think so," I admitted sternly, shaking my head.

"What made you think that?" she asked, frowning.

I looked away and took a deep breath. I opened my mouth to answer her, but then the locker room's door opened. The basketball team came out in their shitty monkey suits, each carrying a gym bag. Some of them shot me pitiful looks when they saw me. Others looked slightly scared, quickly avoiding my eyes and leaving.

I didn't blame them. I probably looked ready for some bloody fight.

"You look lost, Oz," someone piped up.

I turned and came face-to-face with Finn McKinley. His facial expression said he was sorry for me. But as I looked more into his eyes, I could swear I saw the glint of mischief.

"Sorry to hear about what happened," added Cameron sincerely.

"Yeah," agreed Lawley. "It's pretty bad, huh?"

My eyes switched to them. I realized they were anything but sincere. It seemed like I was the only one to notice, though. They were such good damn actors that if I didn't look, I would've believed they meant it.

"We're all sorry to hear about the news," sighed Finn, looking down. He looked up and lightly slapped my arm. "Hey, man. If you need anything, just ask."

I coldly looked at his hand on my arm, waiting for him to remove it. Slowly, he did. I returned my eyes to him, staring until he got uneasy.

"Where's Scout?" I asked, calmer than I expected myself to be.

"Oz, please," whispered Snow from behind, tugging my arm. As much as I wanted to give in to her, I had to know the truth. I needed to.

Finn's eyes traveled to her, then back to me.

"What's going on?" he asked, growing more uncomfortable by the minute. Good.

"You tell me," I dared, cocking my head to the side.

"I think you're exhausted from what you've been through today. You're not thinking clearly. You need rest."

I took a step closer to him. "What am I thinking about that's not clear?"

"I'm not sure, but you look unstable."

"You really have no idea, huh?"

"Oz, you should step back," warned Cameron, trying to step between me and Finn.

"Not until you fucking admit to it," I spat.

The corner of Finn's lips twitched, making my hands turn to fists. That was a sure tell. Fucking dipshit was fighting back a smile.

"Admit to what?" demanded Lawley, with the right amount of indignance.

I punched a wall right beside Finn's head, not giving a shit that it would hurt pretty bad later. I was fucking fed up with their games. I saw right through them. And it absolutely pissed me the hell off how nobody else could see it.

"What are you doing?" asked Scout, suddenly showing up beside me. "Oz, we get that you're not in a very good place right now. But there's no need to take it out on us. You need to go home and cool it off."

I gritted my teeth, pushing my fist on the wall even more.

I've always believed that Scout was the good guy. Even if I hated him, there was still a part of me that respected him. But now, every ounce of respect I had left for him went out the fucking window - along with the little mercy I had for his team.

"We're late, guys," he announced to his team. "Let's go get in the bus outside before Coach B comes looking for us." I didn't have to look at him to know that he faced me to add, "I'm sorry for what happened to your teammate - and everything else. I could only imagine what you're going through right now."

I closed my eyes, my jaw clenching. I hated how earnest he sounded. I almost believed him. He was so fucking good playing innocent it made me sick.

I heard them start to move. Opening my eyes, I straightened up and watched them go. I took deep breaths, trying to calm myself and reigning in my anger. I was too fucking close to losing it. I was like a ticking bomb.

"He's gone off the rails, dude," some fucktard said, not even bothering to lower his voice. "You know what? He should've died in that fire - saves us from his pesky existence."

Boom.

I snapped.

I crouched and tackled the dipshit to the ground. My left hand held him down on his chest, while the other turned to a fist and hit his face with all my might.

Again.

And again.

Someone grabbed my arm. I nudged that person away and took my arm back. I went back to hitting the dipshit beneath me. I heard a crack, probably his nose. Awesome.

"Oz, stop it!"

But I didn't stop.

My heart was pounding hard against my chest. All I saw was red. I was too fucking furious to give a shit about anything. I wanted a damn outlet. Right now. And I had one.

I looked at his bloody face. I didn't even feel bad.

Anger. Rage. Fury.

They all consumed me.

But then I felt several hands grab hold of me, pulling me away from the motherfucker who uttered something he shouldn't have.

"Let go of me!"

I'm not done with him!

I struggled to get free. There was three or four guys detaining me. I faintly felt pride because it took that much to hold me down. Suckers.

The last thing I saw was big oaf Oakley's fist coming right at me.

After that, I passed out.

. . .

When I woke up, I was in a cell.

For a couple of minutes, I felt disoriented. I tried to recall what I did for me to end up here. My eyes wandered to my bruised and bloodied knuckles.

Oh, right. I almost beat someone to death. Yay.

I sighed and rubbed my temple, thinking about the consequences of what I've done. I was pretty sure I'd end up in juvie. I was only seventeen, after all.

Damn, shit just got real. I couldn't believe I lost my cool like that.

"Lacy," called an officer, keying the lock. "You got bail."

I gave him an incredulous look. I haven't called anyone. Who the hell would bail me? Only a guardian could . . . Wait, no way. I didn't believe it.

Frowning, I stood up and followed the male officer out. We got to the lobby and I was half expecting to see my folks. I really should've known better.

Clyde laid eyes on me and thanked the officer he was talking to. I rolled my eyes and hang my head as he walked towards me. Of course, he was here.

I couldn't read his expression. I never could.

"Your girlfriend called me."

I groaned.

Snow.

I completely forgot about her. After watching me beat the shit out of some poor kid, I doubted she wanted to see me again. I was actually surprised she even cared enough to call my brother. That was some sick stuff I did back there.

And just like that, the pain from everything was back.

Today was a very, very shitty day. I honestly didn't think it could any worse than this. I felt like a fucking kid again, lost and vulnerable in the humungous world.

I took a deep shaky breath, running a hand through my hair. Clyde seemed to notice because I felt his hand on my shoulder, patting me gently.

"Come on," whispered my brother softly, sounding so caring that I had to look at him. "You had a long day. Let me take you home."

There was no pretense. He wasn't acting.

Not knowing what to make of that, I just followed him out of the precinct in silence. We headed to the parking lot, walking towards his car. He unlocked it when we got near. But I didn't get in. I thoughtfully stared at my hand on the handle, then looked up at him.

"How's the kid?" I didn't have to elaborate for him to get who I was referring to.

He sighed. "He's still alive. Nose broken, but nothing too serious."

"They didn't press charges." It wasn't a question.

"You think I'll let them?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at me.

He was always the one to bail me out, always the one to save me from a mess.

"I took care of it. You don't have to worry about it anymore. Now get in the car so we can go home," he added, before climbing in the driver's seat.

I didn't fail to notice that he kept saying 'home' instead of 'house.' What the hell was that about? It was weird.

I got inside his car, closed the door, and leaned my head back. I was exhausted. I just wanted to sleep this off. This day sucked to no end.

Closing my eyes, I fell asleep so fast I didn't even realize it.

I think it's only for a few minutes, though. I can't sleep for much long because it's too hot and I'm sweating. And since I can't sleep, everything that happened today keeps coming back to me. It's fucking depressing.

Giving up, I opened my eyes. They widened at what I saw. It was something I didn't thought possible; I caught Clyde turning the car's A/C towards me.

I blinked in astonishment.

It was a simple gesture. But you had no idea how that little thing could mean so damn much - especially in our family of emotionless pricks.

And that's when it hit me.

My brother gave a damn about me. He might not be the kindest man, but he sure as hell took care of me unlike our shitty parents. All this time, he looked out for me in his own screwed up way. Still, he looked out for me nonetheless.

Shit, my eyes stung at the realization that he cared.

He fucking cared.

Damn.

"You alright?" asked Clyde, glancing briefly before returning his eyes back to the road. I didn't think he knew that I saw what he did.

I merely nodded, unable to speak. My voice might fucking crack if I did.

He sighed. "It's all shit. It happens. It's the reason mom and dad forced us to attend a public high school. It shapes us to become survivors because as you can see, it's a fucking jungle out there. The real world only gets worse." He paused, then admitted, "We're a fucked up family, all screwed in the head. We don't know how to be affectionate because we grew up to do one thing; to succeed."

I didn't speak. It was true.

"But why do you think all of us come home every Christmas?" he continued. He used that word again. "To act and pretend like a happy family, when no one's looking? Fuck no. We wouldn't be coming home if we didn't want to."

"Get to the point, Clyde," I grumbled.

"You're not a moron. Figure it out."

I only grunted.

"Check your voice mail while you're at it."

My scowl deepened, pulling out my phone to check.

2 VOICE MAILS

I put the phone by my ear and listened.

"I heard from Clyde," came Annabelle's worried voice. "Do you need me to come home?"

Beep!

"Don't you dare end up in jail, Oswald," warned Diana's voice. "I won't have my brother rot in there like a criminal."

I bit my lip that began shaking. I looked out the window and covered my mouth with my fist. I let out another shaky breath as silently as I could. It took everything in me not to cry like a fucking wimp.

Through the reflection from the window, I watched as Clyde reached out his left hand and turned up the volume.

A tiny sob escaped me before I could stop it, tears filling up my eyes.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

With every shit that's going on around me right now, I can't help it. I'm bound to explode. I'm broken and hurt and I just want the fucking pain to stop.

I just want it to stop.

I took a breath and rubbed my face with a hand, wiping the tears away. That didn't stop it from pouring out, though. Despite the pain surrounding me, there was that little part of me that was relieved.

All this time, I believed they didn't give a shit. Sure, my parents might still don't. But my siblings did. They goddamn cared.

Messed up as we are, we're still a family.

"You're not alone," murmured Clyde. "Remember that."

"Yeah," I managed to choke out.

All of a sudden, my phone vibrated in my hand. I glanced at it. Someone was calling, a blocked caller. I hesitantly answered.

"Nice try earlier, but you can't prove we started the fire."

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This is such an emotional chapter, don't you think? :( In any case, how are you feeling right now? I truly am curious to find out how this chapter affected you, because it affected me. I mean, I cried while I typed the scene with Clyde. :'(

So, that's what happened, people. That is why Oz and his friends loath Scout and his team. That is why they're out for revenge. Whose side are you on?

There's one past chapter left. It's where Snow and Oz broke up. After that, it's gonna be all present chapters.