A/N: posted 1/10/17, edited 1/11/17 4:09 PM

~ * ~

The flower was dark pink, almost red, with yellow-green veins running through the petals and pollen gathered at the center. It sprouted from my table, a dark green stem and roots vanishing into the polished wooden surface. I blinked and it was gone, a figment of my imagination.

It was a humid day, the kind that made it hard to keep my eyes open, and I found myself drowsing off in class for the second time in a row. The sun beat down through the tall glass windows, illuminating particles of dust frozen in the air. It glared off my laptop screen, making it hard to see what I was typing. I gave up trying and quietly closed my computer. I hadn't really been paying attention anyways.

"That's all for today. Enjoy the nice weather this afternoon!" Our professor wrapped up class with a smile, turning off the overhead projector and sending us on our way.

I made my way to Espresso Express, my on-campus cafe of choice, where I worked almost every day. Today it was merely routine, my mind wandering off and my attention hazy as I waited in line for my coffee, thinking it might help me stay on task.

"Annie!" I turned around to see Marie, a close friend of mine and a borderline engineering genius, running up to me.

"Yes, dear?"

"New Stone Age is playing a concert this Saturday, tickets $25. You in?"

I nodded offhandedly, only half paying attention.

Marie leaned against the railing between us with a concerned expression. "You okay, Anita? You're usually more excited about concerts than this."

I hesitated. "Yeah... I'm okay. Just a little out of it today."

I looked down at the floor, trying to clear my head. I felt a cool breeze on the back of my neck and sighed, relieved. "Feels like they finally put in some air conditioning."

There was no reply. I looked up and felt my breath catch in my throat. The bustling cafe was now empty, the windows broken and cobwebs and dust covering the counter. The sky outside was grey and cloudy, all signs of the sunshine and heat gone.

"Marie?" I called cautiously, "Hello?"

"Sweetheart, your order?" I blinked and the cafe was full again, the heat still hanging in the air like a blanket.

"Um, yeah." I could feel myself frowning, trying not to panic. "Just a medium coffee."

I paid and walked back over to Marie.

"You okay, sis?" she asked, while putting her long black hair up in a messy bun. "You froze up back there, kind of like a computer malfunction. Thought we lost you for a moment." She laughed, but I couldn't bring myself to play along.

"I don't know," I replied, "I guess I just imagined..." I trailed off, not sure what to say.

"Maybe you're just tired," Marie suggested. "It happens to the best of us, even me." She grinned.

"Ha. Yeah, you're probably right." It was my imagination, just like the flower on my table earlier that day.

We got a table by the windows, pulling out our laptops automatically to start on schoolwork.

"So..." Marie began, in that sly tone that meant she was about to bring up something personal. "There's this guy in my calculus class who saw us talking in the hall the other day and asked about you. Interested?"

"I don't know. What's he like?" I was always hesitant to go on blind dates, but it had been awhile and eventually I would have to give someone a chance.

"Funny. Tall. Seems honest and not at all creepy. Here, I'll find his profile for you." She pulled up a picture of a boy with medium-short blond hair and an infectious smile. Scrolling down his wall, I saw that he was indeed funny, and seemed well-liked.

"Well... I guess so. What's the harm in a date, right?"

"Yes! No harm at all! I'll message him right now." Marie was visibly excited and a little too proud of herself.

That finally coaxed a smile out of me. It was a welcome distraction from my wild imagination. "Speaking of relationships," I said, "How are you and Theresa?"

"Hmmm." Marie smiled slightly, looking thoughtful. "Wonderful. Going on six months now." Theresa was the kind of sweet, beautiful girl that everyone loved, a carefree blonde artist who practically emulated sunshine.

Marie, on the other hand, was a little more edgy, with piercings and tattoos and a music library full of screaming. She was beautiful in her own way, with medium brown skin and a slight French accent, having immigrated to the United States with her mother at ten years old. We had been friends for two years, having hit it off instantly over our mutual love for music and horror movies.

I generally took impeccable care of myself, using hair products and makeup every day and usually wearing the latest styles. This semester, however, my appearance was slipping. I could feel myself becoming more tired and worn down, counting down the minutes until the end of each day.

Marie left for her next class, and I made my way lazily to the bus stop. I lived at home, just a few miles from campus. My father taught at the school, which meant I didn't really have a choice in which university I attended. I had free tuition at the University of Bayton, New York, so that was where I was destined to go. Sometimes it hit me how little control I had really had over my own life, but I tried not to dwell on it.

I stared at my own reflection in the bathroom mirror, feeling uninspired and exhausted. At twenty years old, it was like my life had already passed me by.

I looked down to dry my hands, and when I looked back up at the mirror, I screamed. It was a reflex, set off by shock and horror. The shower curtain behind me was shredded, covered in something that looked like blood.

I whirled around, but the illusion didn't disappear. Dust covered the counters and there were bloody handprints on the walls. I looked into the bottom of the shower, shaking, and saw what looked like an eyeball. I screamed again, covering my eyes with my hands.

"Please let this be another illusion," I whispered to myself, just wanting to hear the sound of someone's voice. When I uncovered my face, the image was gone, my bathroom returned back to its usual state. I turned back to the mirror and saw tears running down my face.

I needed more sleep, I told myself. It was just exhaustion and emotions running high. I was imagining things.

~ * ~

I waited nervously by the door to the restaurant. I wore a pastel pink dress and my short hair was pushed back with a glittery headband. I worried I was overdressed, but it was too late to do anything now. I checked my phone to see I was still three minutes early.

"Anita?" I looked up to see the boy Marie had shown me.

"Wow, you really are tall."

He laughed and introduced himself as Victor Cortez, a senior majoring in criminal justice. He was nice enough to distract me from my worries for a couple hours, and I found myself joking with him and being able to talk to him genuinely.

It reminded me of the last boy I had dated. We had only gone on four dates, and I liked him well enough, but for some reason I couldn't commit. It felt like something was missing in my life, and I didn't have the energy to give a chance to someone who couldn't fill that gap.

"I just feel so tired lately," I admitted to Victor, "Like I've been zoning out in class and during conversations, and I keep imagining things." I paused, not sure if I should continue. "Anyways, I'm sure it's nothing. Probably just a manifestation of the frustration and lack of control I feel regarding my everyday life."

Victor raised his eyebrows. "Psychoanalyzing yourself? And here I thought we were just having dinner."

I smiled and sipped my ice water. "Just keeping things interesting."

"My turn," he said jokingly. "Well... I would have to say my love of music comes from a lifelong tendency towards escapism and a longing to find someone I can relate to. Being adopted, it often felt like I was the odd one out growing up. Especially since my parents are Latino and I'm, well..."

"Blonde?" I suggested.

He laughed. "Yes, that works."

VIctor gave me his number and a quick kiss on the cheek before departing. As I watched him walk away into the night, I felt entirely alone. Despite the pressing heat, I felt cold to my very core.