Hey everyone! Sorry for the long hiatus (probably not surprising if you've known me for a while), but I am back and with a new chapter. Since it's been a while....

Previously on Crooked...

"Th-there are things you don't know." A sob bursts right next to my ear. Whittney's voice shakes with fear. "About me. You won't love me when you find out how disgusting I am."

I pull away, but I keep a firm hold on his arms. My brows furrow and concern spills from my voice. "What are you talking about?"

Whittney shoves me hard this time, making me stumble back on the slickness of the grass. He falls to his knees in the pouring rain. Dirty water splashes when his fists hit the muddy ground. "I'm a fucking disgusting faggot! Don't you get it?"

Rain mixes with the tears on his face as he looks at me. My heart feels like it's being filled with cement - heavy and cold. With blurring eyes, I reach out for him, but he slaps my hand away.

"Stop it," I plead with him. "Talk to me!"

A throat-tearing cry expels from his mouth as he squeezes his eyes shut. He clenches his fists into clumps of grass, watery mud slipping through his fingers. The sight is enough to make my heart break for him, as it's done so many times before. "I can't," he cries. Strands of wet hair fall in his face as he shakes his head. "I can't."

"Please, Whitt. Let me help you!" Every muscle in my body is fighting my brain to hold him, but he'll just reject any advancement.

Red eyes filled with anger and contempt find mine and I can't breathe. There's so much hurt in them, and there's nothing I can do about it. There never has been.

"I slept with him." His face twists in pain when he shuts his eyes.

My breath is caught on the lump in my throat as I wait for him to clarify, but he doesn't. "Slept with who?"

A sob breaks through his lips, his head hanging in defeat. "The guy who raped me."

Chapter 27: Closure

Whittney is slouched on the couch, a blanket wrapped around him when I bring him some chamomile tea to calm his nerves. As he takes the mug, a thankful smile stretches his lips. Not wanting to push him, I wait patiently for him to open up about what he confessed to me outside.

The silence surrounds the room, creating this thick tension between us. Whittney's face is filled with uncertainty as I watch him sip his tea. He probably regrets telling me, realizing now that he has to talk about it. If he hadn't told me until now, chances are he's kept this to himself all this time. With no one to turn to for something like that, I don't know how he's managed for so long.

When I reach out my hand to touch his arm, he flinches, making me pull away. I'm not sure how to help him right now or how to comfort him.

An apologetic look twists his face before he lets out a sigh. "It, uh, happened in freshman year." Whittney clears his throat. "He was one of my brother's friends and a horrible person."

A heavy silence interrupts before he continues. "I was just getting back from practice when he was waiting for me. He'd been giving me these weird looks for weeks, so I knew exactly what he wanted when he finally got me alone. After running to my room, I thought I had time to escape through the window, but-" His voice breaks with a small whimper as tears fill his eyes. "B-but I wasn't fast enough."

I don't want to hear any more. My throat is closing up and there's an unbearable twist in my stomach.

"Cal started pushing my door open." That's the first time he uses his rapist's name, and he can barely get it out. I can practically hear the tightness in his throat as tears spill from his eyes. "I wasn't strong enough, so when he shoved hard, I fell to the floor. He was on top of me fast and strong enough to hold my arms down with one hand, using the other to tie my wrists together with his belt. And then he . . . then he-"

He stops thereafter, a small cry interrupting his words. This time, when I reach out to him, he doesn't withdraw from my touch. I pull him into my arms as he sobs and he hugs my torso tightly as I soothingly rub his back.

"Shh, it's okay." I want to be strong for him, but my own eyes blur and my voice is weak. "You don't have to continue."

We stay like this for a while, finding refuge in each other's embrace, but Whittney breaks the silence with a little more strength in his voice. "He's the reason I started getting into drugs and drinking as much as I do. None of that shit helped anything though. Nothing ever helped me feel any better except . . . you."

The smallest smile creeps on my lips, but it quickly fades when Whittney's tears don't let up.

I grab his hand and squeeze reassuringly, but I stay quiet so he can continue.

"I still have these panic attacks sometimes, and I hear everything he said to me that day. Over and over. And I actually started believing him. After I lost my friends at school, you were the only one who stood by me, and I wish it would've been enough for me at the time. I just wanted it to stop. To be able to go a day without hearing him in the back of my head. I thought it was the best way to get closure. To get over it."

"By sleeping with him?" I reply quietly - carefully.

Whittney nods. "And then when I hurt you, I was so down on myself. That time, I guess it was me punishing myself."

"You did this twice?" I ask, putting more pieces of this dreadful situation together.

His lips are quivering as he nods, sitting up to set the mug on the side table. When he looks back at me pain and regret reflect in his eyes. I hate seeing him like this. He's done bad things, but he isn't defined by the mistakes he's made or the bad things that have happened. He's more than the wrongs he's committed in his life.

He's the only person I've ever truly been in love with.

I wrap my arms around him and pull him into my chest as he continues to cry. "Well, don't listen to him, okay? If you hear him again, focus on me telling you that you are stronger than him. That punishing yourself is not the answer and you deserve to see yourself for who you are, not a lie that he's made you believe."

"What am I then?" He looks up at me and sniffles.

"You're a badass."

A laugh escapes him as he sits up. "A badass?"

I nod with a small smile. "You don't put up with people's bullshit, stand up for people who can't stand up for themselves, and you're pretty fucking tough if you can go through everything you have and still keep going. Plus, I'm pretty sure you could get sponsored for skateboarding because of how good you are."

He laughs again, but genuinely this time.

"I, Uh-." His voice breaks a little. "I was serious, you know? About you being with Bradley. He's good for you. I don't want to keep screwing up your life."

"You didn't screw up my life." I grab his hand and squeeze it. "Never think that."

Whittney looks down and smiles a little, interlocking our fingers. "You deserve more than I can give you."

"I don't love Bradley," I counter, my freehand cupping his face.

"That doesn't mean you won't be happier with him." Whittney sighs and avoids my gaze. "I'm trying to let you go. You should, too."

"How do you expect me to do that?"

He looks up again at the question; a smile laced with sadness appears on his lips. "By falling in love with your boyfriend."

I look down, biting the inside of my cheek before my eyes meet his again. "You're not disgusting, you know? For doing what you did. That never should have happened to you."

"But it did, and I need to find a healthy way to deal with it. I'm going to become better." He nods as if reassuring himself. "Not only for me but for you. So that one day, when things between you and Bradley don't work out, I'll be there to be the perfect man for you. One who can love you. Properly."

"You are already the perfect man for me..."

With a small shake of his head, Whittney disagrees. "You and I both know I'm not that guy yet. But there's someone else who can be that for you now."

As much as I want to say he's got it all wrong, he's so convinced that there's no way I could love him for who he is now. For what he's done. But it's clear that he needs time. He needs time to become the person he wants himself to be. To grow.

I'm proud of him.

Tears fill my eyes again as I look at the version of Whittney who I've always known he was capable of becoming. The Whittney who sees his mistakes and promises to work on them. The Whittney who doesn't shy away from my touch. The Whittney who I've been in love with this whole time.

"Okay... Okay." I nod, my hand cupping his cheek. Leaning in, I plant one last kiss on his lips. Short, but passionate. After pulling away, my forehead hesitates a second before our faces are inches apart again.

"Bye, Harry." After he stands up, our hands stay intertwined for just a moment longer before I no longer feel his touch.

And then he's gone.

***

So it seems like Whittney and Harry have said their goodbyes for now. What do you think? Are you happy that Whittney is pushing Harry to be with Bradley, or do you think Whittney and Harry are the ones who are meant to be together? And how do you feel about Whittney at this point of the story? Has he redeemed himself yet, or do you think he needs to do more than an apology to get better?

Let me know what you think in the comments down below, and hopefully, you liked the chapter enough to give it a like. I'm happy to have finally gotten the time to post since my vacation and the whole hecticness of moving out of the house finally. Thank you all very much for being so patient and still coming back to reading. You guys keep me going after I think I've lost all inspiration to write. (: 

Until next time,

TheWriterD