Author: ginger_ed12

Title: the balcony girl

It's a good title for a romance, but the lower case has me a little confused.

Cover: it's a girl on a balcony. A fitting cover for the title of the story. The image is pretty and the font works.

Summary: okay, is there a reason you don't use capital letters? Because it's rubbing me the wrong way. Apparently they are intentional. Still rubbing me the wrong way.

The first paragraph is good, if a little info happy. The second one gives out too much information. I think it would work as two simple phrases: one day, she disappears. And when she doesn't come again, nico sets out into the summer night to find his balcony girl.

I think it's more powerful and to the point.

Story: why are you writing in small caps?? It's not helping your story look more artistic. You know what it's doing? Making it hard to read. Because for fast readers, they tell where a new sentence begins or where a character name is mentioned by the uppercase. Without it, it just looks wrong and I had to focus to read it properly because my eyes kept skipping across the page. I would have not trouble with you breaking the rules if I actually saw a reason for it. I don't. 

Also, song lyrics should definitely be in italics.

The story seems okay. Balcony girl is likable and so is nico. Their interactions are cute, even if a little sudden and sometimes uncalled for. 

I'm not sure why she keeps calling him Troy after he told her his name, but whatever. The sleeping thing was cute, though I have to admit the whole singing thing feels a bit weird, especially without any further explanation.

Overall, the story has potential, but the lowercase is very off putting.

Score: 7/10

By : Wimbug