DANTE

Standing at the bar, watching the performer before him, Turner thinks about how the hell she manages to do her act. He tilts his head, observing the belly dancer closely. He could never get his own tummy to move around like that, which is probably a good thing. Besides, isn't belly dancing a mostly female profession, anyway?

After another long day on the road, the bands and crew finally made it to Austin. Christian had somehow talked the majority of the group into going to a hookah bar near the hotel. Even though Turner is whipped, he decided to come out anyway. He had been sitting with the group, but soon grew tired of Christian and Alex bickering over what flavors to order (peach vs. pineapple). Personally, Turner's up for strawberry but no one had listened when he suggested it. Nevertheless, now that he's here, Turner will admit it's good to unwind.

The best part about the trip out is he gets to avoid Sky longer. He hasn't talked to Sky since The Incident. In most part, due to Turner's adept evasion skills. After Sky caught him, Turner made sure not to spend the night in the room. He crashed in Ryan's instead. And sure, today, his friend has tried several times to speak up, but Turner manages to rope someone else into the conversation. On the bus, Turner made sure to stay glued to either Christian or Alex so Sky couldn't get him alone. Now, this current outing allows for more avoidance time. Honestly, he's surprised he's been able to keep up the charade.

His stomach clenches as an annoyingly reasonable part of himself points out he and Sky will have to talk at some point. They have tons of time before the tour is over. He can't avoid his bestie forever.

But damn it, he's gonna try.

"Hey," Ryan says, hovering by Turner's side. His latest hook up has somehow snuck up right next to him. He's been trying to keep things light with Ryan, but Ryan is more persistent—regardless of the fact, Turner's implied they need to lay low. Because um, yeah, he's scarred for life where casual hookups are concerned. That won't be happening again anytime soon. Too bad Ryan hasn't taken the hint yet.

Thus, Turner forces himself to engage in banal chitchat because his manners won't allow for anything less. God help him.

"Hi," he says.

"This place is nice. It's good for us to hang out like this. Unwind and everything."

"Yeah, for sure."

"Do you want a drink?" Ryan asks. He brushes his hand against Turner's hip. It comes off as if he's shifting to avoid the crowd, by moving closer to Turner. But Turner knows better.

"No, I'm good. Actually, I have to go to the restroom, if you'll excuse me..."

"Of course."

He heads in his new direction only to make eye contact with Sky, who's standing nearby. Perfect. Turner gives him a quick nod. After all, he doesn't want to be completely rude. However, that's the only acknowledgment he gets as Turner hurries past him.

He feels momentarily relieved as he hides out in the side corridor near the bathrooms. But it turns out he's not safe here. His choice is horrifyingly wrong.

"Turn." He freezes, doomed. Only one person, in his whole life, calls him by that nickname. He squeezes his eyes shut, hoping he imagined it. Hoping he isn't so stupid, he's given Sky the opportunity to corner him.

"Are you ever going to talk to me again? Or are you going to be a wimp for the rest of the tour?" Sky asks.

"I'm not being a wimp. And there's nothing to talk about," Turner says as coolly as he can without his voice shaking. He flees for the nearest exit but is shocked when Sky grabs him by the arm.

"Yes. There is."

"Drop it, okay?" Turner tugs free of Sky's hold.

"So what? You're ready to throw years of friendship down the drain simply because you're embarrassed? It's okay that you're...the way you are. I'm—I'm fine with it."

"Gee whiz! Thanks for your permission." Turner sneers, getting angry. He has to get angry. Going on the defensive is all he has left. Without the arguing, there's only the truth. A truth Turner can't bear to tell.

"Don't twist my words around." Sky argues.

"This is my business. It has nothing to do with you."

"You made it my business when you were screwing someone in our hotel room."

"It's not my fault you're a peeping Tom." Turner hisses back. He makes another dash for the exit but Sky blocks him, determined to square off.

"You want to do this? You want to hear all the kinky details, then fine. But not here." Turner jerks his head, motioning towards the bar's side door.

"Fine." Sky repeats after him, holding the door open, daring Turner to back out.

He doesn't. Even though he's a nervous wreck, he decides to meet his fate. The night's chilling breeze whips around him the second he gets outside. He wraps his arms around himself, bracing for the thousand burning questions Sky's bound to ask. He's going to hate every single one.

Because it would be one thing—an entirely different thing—if maybe, Turner had the guts to sit down and tell Sky. But Sky wasn't told Turner is gay, he saw first-hand how gay he really is. His best friend has seen what Turner looks like before...well before he's about to come. That's not okay. In no universe is that even remotely okay.

"Go ahead. Ask away," Turner says, opening the floodgates to hell.

"How long have you known?"

He doesn't answer, too busy dreading how far this conversation will go.

"Turner." Sky insists. Turner coughs, avoiding eye contact.

"Since high school."

"High school?!" Sky exclaims. "Have you told anyone else?"

"I don't go around advertising it, Sky."

"Just your mom?"

"...And Jer."

"Why the hell did you tell Jer and not me?"

"I didn't tell him necessarily...we ran into each other at a club once."

Sky opens his mouth to protest some more, but Turner cuts him off.

"And it's none of your business anyway. It doesn't concern you."

"Yes, it does. I'm your friend. I should know this kind of stuff about you."

"You don't need to know everything about me. Besides, you're being a hypocrite. You hide things too. You haven't opened up once about your dad. And you've been snorting back coke like you have Mr. Snuffleupagus's big ass nose."

"Snuffawho? That Muppets character?" Sky asks, momentarily confused.

"It's Sesame Street, jackass," Turner snarls.

Sky starts to defend himself for the insult but then shakes himself out of Turner's intentional deflection. "My dad and fictional characters have nothing to do with this. Stop trying to distract me."

"Then stop pushing me, Sky."

"But I don't get it. Did you not trust me or something? Did you think I'd judge you? Because I wouldn't, Turn. You can tell me anything."

Turner doesn't expect to lose it, but at last, it comes out, everything he's been holding back. Bordering on hysterical, he yells at Sky.

"How could I tell you? How could I tell my best friend I'm in love with him?"

"What?" Sky croaks out.

"You want to know how I found out I was gay? Because of you. I fell in love with you. For years, it's been you."

He turns his back to Sky, walking a few steps away. He's ready to die, from embarrassment, from fear, from the inevitable rejection he'll soon feel. Sky reacts exactly the way he thought he would. Disbelief.

"Alright. I get it. You're screwing with me because you're pissed off."

"You said you wanted to know. So there you go. Are you happy now?" Turner says bitterly. Then, he hears Sky let out a small laugh.

"Well Turner, if that's true, then you have terrible taste."

Turner faces Sky, stunned. He knew this would be painful, he knew it would be mortifying, but he never anticipated cruelty.

"Are you seriously mocking me right now?"

"No. Of course not. I was only trying to—"

"Stay away from me," Turner demands. Without another word, he walks past Sky and goes inside.

Don't cry. Please don't cry. Turner inwardly pleads his tear ducts, commanding them not to humiliate him in public. He makes a solemn vow to his brimming, wet eyes: they can go back to the hotel and bawl like a baby there. Making his way through the crowd, Turner gives his friends a rushed goodbye and leaves the club, heading back to do exactly what he's promised.

*** If only this had gone better and Turner could have heard the words he really wanted Sky to say...

https://youtu.be/JQj0GwR8yL8

Thanks for reading! ***