Santa Fe to Austin

DAY TEN

FANGIRLS

Yes. She's a chicken. A big, fat, guilty chicken.

Erin openly admits this in the comfort of her safe bedroom. It's safe because here, she won't have to face Derek. She's a coward, hiding up here after she blatantly stood him up this afternoon. She never showed and Derek's called her, but she refused to pick up. Because the second she meets Derek face to face, she'll burst into tears. She has no idea what he's going to say to her, and quite frankly, she has no desire to find out. Thankfully, Erin's sucked out of her emo ponderings by her mother calling her from downstairs.

She pops her head out of her bedroom door, yelling back down. "Yeah?!"

"Come here."

Groaning, Erin drags herself down the stairs. Hitting the bottom floor, she calls out to her mom. "What is it, Mom?" She rounds the corner and goes into the kitchen before her mom has time to fully answer her. She regrets it instantly.

There he is.

Derek Evans is sitting at her kitchen table, chitchatting with her mom. He's in her house—HE'S IN HER HOUSE! And he's just sitting there—like he comes here all the time! He looks cozy: lounging in their country kitchen chair, with a glass of sweet iced tea in his hand.

How is this happening?!

Erin's still stunned in the doorway when her mom and Derek notice her standing there.

"Erin, look who stopped by," her mother says, too cheerfully for Erin's liking. Derek's managed to charm her mother the same way he does with everyone else. And clearly, Gina's thrilled to have such a hot guy paying house calls to her daughter. Give it up, Mom. I already have.

"Ah, oh," Erin mumbles, swallowing nervously as Derek's eyes lock onto hers—and stare into her very soul. They've lost a bit of the humor they had when Derek was talking to her mom. They're more calculating and she's hating this already.

"Hey Erin," he says, remaining light and easy, although he's giving off: "We need to talk. Don't run away—or else" vibes. Oh shit...

"Hey," Erin says so quietly, she's not sure if she makes a sound or simply ends up mouthing her words instead. Erin's mom frowns. She crowds Erin, making her reflex mothering move, holding her hand up to Erin's forehead.

"Honey, are you feeling okay? You look flustered." Out of her peripheral vision, Erin swears she sees Derek hide a slight smirk.

"No, um, I'm fine." She offhandedly motions her mother away from her.

"I was telling Derek how nice it is to meet him. You've been talking about the paper so much, how great the editors are, and it does seem like Derek's a very nice boy."

"Thank you, Ms. Lee. It's nice meeting you too," Derek says, all parent-proper. "And thanks again for letting me visit, especially since I dropped by unannounced—this tea is great, by the way."

"Aw, you're so sweet! And it's no problem. You're welcome any time." Gina gushes before glancing dreamily between Erin and Derek.

"Mom," Erin says.

At last, Gina shakes herself out of plotting her daughter's wedding. "Well then," she begins sweetly. "I'll let you two talk."

"I was thinking, it's so nice outside today. You want to talk out there, Erin?" Derek asks meaningfully.

This is not a yes or no invitation.

Erin bites her lip.

"Yeah. Here, we can go onto the back porch." She points in the direction of the back door.

Erin turns, ready to lead him to the backyard. He gets up smoothly to follow her. As they leave, Erin is all too aware of how her mother is swooning. She's clearly imagining them in some old-timey, Little Women-esque setting. Erin elegantly fanning herself as Derek looks out on the backyard, talking about how much he loves her and wants her to have his twenty children.

Damn. If only that was true.

Stepping outside, Erin takes a deep breath of fresh air, steeling herself for whatever horrifying humiliation's going to come next. Derek quietly closes the screen door behind them, but regardless, it sounds like an ax whacking down on a guillotine. She stands at the edge of the white porch, holding on tightly to the railing.

"Erin..." Derek's voice is so kind and earnest, it makes her want to cry. Erin's reassured he won't be screaming at her but she's not a fan of the alternative. She doesn't need to be let down easy. She's played this scenario out in her head a hundred times:

Sorry, kid, I don't feel that way.

Look, you're not my type, so...

Let's be friends.

Erin, I think you're really cool, BUT...

"Look. I get that it's unsettling for me to come to your house like this, but when you didn't show up this afternoon...I mean, what was I supposed to do? Let this tension between us go on for the rest of the year?"

"I'm sorry," Erin chokes out on a soft sob.

"What?" Derek asks.

"I'm sorry," she repeats, louder this time, broken. She whirls back around, staring at his feet. "You're mad. I don't blame you. I would be too if some geeky guy got all pervy on me without my consent."

"Pervy?" He's not laughing, but he's not taking her seriously either.

"It's not funny, Derek! I made a total ass out of myself, and—and—"

Did I mention it was my first kiss?

"You're right. It's not funny, but you've got to stop being so hard on yourself." Derek gestures toward the porch's rocking chairs. Sniffling, Erin settles down in the chair next to his. She looks down at her hands but Derek ducks his head down, forcing her to take notice of him.

"First of all, I don't think you're a geek."

"Okay, sure. You can stop trying to spare my feelings. I know where I stand."

Derek leans forward. He rests his elbows on his knees, propping his head up on his hands. He cocks his head to the side and studies her, an unreadable expression on his face. "Clearly you don't."

He doesn't get it. She can't stand that he's being nice. He's only proving what a great guy he is—and reminding Erin how she'll never be his girlfriend.

"Derek, come on," Erin chides him and gives him a skeptical look. He does laugh this time.

"Wow, I swear, girls like you..." he starts, ruffling his hair.

"Girls like me what?"

"Girls who have so much going for them, but refuse to acknowledge their own potential—"

Whoa. Wait a second. Is he legitimately about to compliment her?

"—are really frustrating. They drive me crazy."

"Oh," Erin echoes.

"No, I'm not saying, there's anything wrong with you. What I mean is, I think you should have more confidence in yourself."

"Yeah. I'll get right on that."

"You're a nice girl, Erin."

"But?" Erin says, bracing herself for the inevitable.

"But you're way too good for me. We work together. And you already admitted it was a mistake." Derek hesitates. "We are still going to work together, right? For a minute there, I thought you might quit, and I need my right-hand girl with me on staff."

"I'll be there." Erin agrees, falling for this guy all over again.

"Good. God forbid if we had to give the review section to Dan. He's not an eloquent critic like you are. His articles would consist of the words dudetacular and two bras up." Derek gives a shudder.

"I don't get how you can be so normal about this." She groans.

"Well, I hear spontaneous kissing sprees are a regular occurrence for teenagers," he points out scientifically.

"Oh please! I practically molested you! In front of half the school—" Erin freaks. "But no one saw, right? Please tell me you didn't tell anyone!"

"Mmm. Everything's making sense now. You're embarrassed to be seen with me. So that's why you've been blatantly avoiding me." Derek stares off into the distance, a resigned look on his face.

Erin can't take her eyes off him. "I don't believe this. At least admit, you were mad," she urges him.

"A little, yeah. But mostly, I was relieved you went for someone harmless instead of some of those skeevy-looking guys who were there."

"...And you promise not to tell anyone?" Erin pleads.

"I promise. But you don't have anything to worry about."

"Meaning?" Erin watches him. He stands, stretches; then looks back at her from over his shoulder.

"Out of all the great drunk kisses I've had, yours ranks in the top five."

Erin's mouth hangs open in shock, and yet, she can't get enough air back into her lungs. Derek walks over to the back door, holding it open for her. Super elated, she gets up to daintily walk through but pauses in the doorway. Looking back at him, Erin clears her throat.

"Now when you say top five, how exactly does your ranking system—wait a second. Why have you been kissed drunkenly at least five times?"

Of course, Derek averts her question, giving her a sly wink instead.

"Come on. I want to finish my drink. Your mom's sweet tea skills are definitely up there as number one." He teases her. Erin's mouth drops, but Derek waltzes back into the house before she can call him out on his unamusing joke. Great. An afternoon of her, her crush, and her mom sitting around sipping tea. It does have a bit of a Little Women-esque feel to it, but this time, it's not nearly as romantic.

*** They may not be a couple for now, but Erin will clearly stand by her love for Derek, time after time...

https://youtu.be/7wBgcalM4c4

Thanks for reading! More to come on Thursday! ***