"Most Creepypasta aren't afraid of anything, but there is one thing they fear above all:

Fangirls."

"BEN," You ground out, grip white-knuckled on your controller. "I swear to God, if you don't stop backseat gaming I'm going to take this controller and kill you with it."

Behind you, the glitch in question whined, pulling on his hat anxiously.

"But- you make it so difficult not to!" He pointed out in a slightly pained voice. Beside him, Toby nodded, also looking a little pained.

"He's got a point, (Y/N)," he agreed, eye twitching as he watched you navigate your character through the game. "Its... Painful to *tic* watch." You pouted and turned back to your game.

How the hell were you supposed to know they were two of the worst when it came to backseat gaming? Granted, nobody could beat BEN when it came to that kind of thing, but Toby easily held second place.

"Why the hell are you playing with-without the book, any-anyways?" Toby asked, then turned to BEN. "There is a book, right?" The blond nodded, eyes not leaving the screen.

"Yep," he said tiredly. "Though why you'd need the book when I'm here... I mean, I know I'm known for Majora's Mask, but c'mon, I'm not that bad at the Twilight Princess either!" You rolled your eyes.

"Guys, shut up!" You exploded. "For the love of all things holy, I'm trying to concentrate!"

"Oh, are you playing the Twilight Princess?" EJ asked as he walked by. You groaned when he jumped over the couch to sit next to BEN and (presumably) help with the backseat gaming as well.

"That's what (Y/N) has told us they're doing, but I think they're trying to give me a migraine instead," BEN said, rubbing his temples. EJ knit his eyebrows and turned to Toby. The proxy sighed.

"They have very... r-roundabout ways of play-playing," he explained. "You'll see in a minute." EJ nodded, falling silent to watch you.

You counted down in your head. 3, 2, 1-!

"You do know you have to use the Gale Boomerang to get those bastards down, right?" You sighed and hit your head against the controller, forcefully and repeatedly.

"Hey hey hey!" BEN cried. "Be nice to my controller!" You stopped your destruction of your own brain cells long enough to give him the evil eye.

"Shut up BEN, I'm venting my frustrations," you snapped. BEN pinwheeled his arms.

"And what did my poor game controller do to deserve your wrath?" He asked, fingers knotted in his hair. "Cease and desist, villian!"

You were literally just about to act on your promise earlier about killing BEN with his own game controller when the front door slammed open.

Startled, the four of you whirled around in tandem, shocked at the sight that greeted your eyes.

The Slenderman leaned against the doorway, hunched over and breathing harshly. He was also trembling voilently, and, unless you were greatly mistaken, silently crying.

EJ cursed; "Shit," he muttered, jumping over the side of the couch. He hovered near the distraught faceless entity, clearly unsure of exactly what he was doing.

"Um, Slendy?" He asked uncertainty. "What... Happened?" Slender drew in a shuddering breath.

"They just... I-I was- they ambushed me!" He burst out. "One minute they weren't there, the next they were!" He clung onto EJ's lapels, much to the cannibal's alarm.

"They were everywhere- and they all wanted the same thing!" The normally calm and composed entity wailed. "They all wanted... children."

"Ok, Toby?" EJ called to the proxy as Slender dissolved into another fit of tears. "Find Jeff, will you? He's got more experience with this than any of us realistically want to have."

Toby nodded and raced off up the stairs in search of the infamous psychopath. Then, EJ turned to BEN and barked out another set of orders;

"Get Sally," he commanded, still looking decidedly uncomfortable with the way the Slenderman was clinging to him. "And tell her to bring Charlie, yeah?"

BEN nodded once, then turned himself into a group of pixels and popped into the television.

You nervously twiddled your thumbs; "Jack? What do I do?" The cannibal stared at you for a moment.

"I don't suppose you wanna help me move this," he gestured to the mess that was the owner of the mansion. "To the couch?" You shrugged and turned off your game.

"Why the hell not?" You asked, electing to go around the couch as opposed to the regular tenants who seemed to favour jumping over it.

You ran up next to EJ and looped one of Slender's arms around your shoulder, gesturing for Jack to do the same.

"What?" You asked at the look he gave you. "This seems like the best method, don't you think?" The cannibal shrugged, and together the two of you guided Slender over to the couch and deposited him in the middle, where he then proceeded to curl up into a little ball and rock back and forth.

You watched the sad, sad, sad sight for a moment before turning to your eyeless friend; "Do I even want to know what caused this?" Eyeless exhaled wearily.

"Fangirls," he said simply. You knit your eyebrows.

"Fangirls?" You repeated. EJ nodded.

"Yeah," he confirmed. "They... They can be a little much."

"Alright, somebody told me somebody suffered an attack from fangirls- oh shit, Slendy, you don't look too good."

You looked up as Jeff entered the room; "Apparently it was fangirls," you explained. Jeff cursed some and crouched down next to Slenderdick.

"Do we know what we're dealing with here?" He asked, uncharacteristically serious for once. "Like, level one, two, three?" EJ worried his bottom lip.

"I think five," he said. "Five or six." Jeff swore.

"Fuck," he said. "Where is Charlie?" EJ nervously chewed his lip.

"I sent BEN to go get Sally 5 minutes ago," he said. "She should be here-"

"OUT OF THE WAY!" A childish scream sounded off, and you whirled around to see Sally running though, Charlie clutched in her hands above her head. BEN was behind her. "CHARLIE IS HERE!"

The undead girl ran into the living area and pressed Charlie into Slender's hands. Almost robotically, the faceless entity squeezed the bear tightly and rythmatically.

You watched the scene from off to the side, unnerved by the OOC-ness Slender displayed.

"Christ," you muttered to EJ. "Do I even want to know what happened?" The cannibal shuddered.

"No, I don't think so," he said honestly, watching worriedly as Toby and Jeff comforted a distraught Slenderman.

"Shh-shh, it's ok," Jeff soothed. "You're hear, in the mansion, they can't get to you here." Toby nodded sagely and gently patted Slender's head.

"The w-w-wards will keep them out," he assured the faceless entity. "If they c-c-come up to th-th-e mansion, th-th-they'll be *tic* f-f-fried!" He jabbed Jeff in the ribs and the sociopath quickly started nodding enthusiastically.

"Yeah!" He agreed, subtly shooting Toby a glare while rubbing the sore spot where he'd been jabbed. "They'll be fried and EJ can have their kidneys! Won't that be nice, Slendy?"

While all his words did was put you on edge, they seemed to have the desired effect on the Slenderman, who looked up at the killers with a hopeful look in his nonexistent eyes.

"Really?" He asked, mental voice quivering. Toby and Jeff nodded in unison.

"Yep!" The older of the two said*. "Jack'll eat 'em all up, won't you Jack?"

The cannibal didn't hesitate; "Yep," he agreed instantly. "Consider their kidneys mine," he hesitated. "Although... I would like to look at their brains too, just to see what makes them tick." Toby snorted.

"You m-mean 'what *tic* makes them obses-obsessed with k-k-killers like us?" EJ shrugged.

"More or less," he admitted, looking down at the Slenderman, who seemed to be drifting off to sleep. "Is he gonna be ok?" Jeff nodded.

"Yeah, he'll be good," the sociopath said. "Maybe a few nightmares, but..." He shrugged. "What're you gonna do, right?"

As if on cue, the Slenderman sat bolt-upright with a scream.

"FANGIRLS COMING IN FROM ABOVE!"

You sighed. It was gonna be a long week.

(*I've got my own headcannon dictating who this is, but can any of you figure it out?
Also, to any of you who know the distinction between psycho and sociopathy, is it just me or are virtually ALL the pasta sociopaths?)