ON FRIDAY NIGHT, I decide to go to the holiday party anyway.

Even if Nick already dumped me Thursday, I'm going to sit at home and mope. I have every intention of showing up and throwing a drink into the face of whoever he decides to bring instead.

As I get ready, I realize that maybe I was wrong all along. It's not Jake, but Nick, who is a huge player. How many girls has Nick been seeing on the side?

Also, what's wrong with me? Am I too chunky? Is my hair too limp and frizzy? Are my lips too big, my chin too sharp? Why didn't Nick love me? I can't stop thinking about how my belly overflows over the top of my Spanx shapewear, and the corners roll down like a piece of fruit roll-up.

I look at myself in the bathroom mirror of my bare apartment. I stand on my tippy toes so that I can see more than just my face and shoulders. The dress is satiny and powder pink, but I don't think I look like Natalie Portman in it. I think I have the elegance of Mrs. Potato-Head with my big nose and shockingly red lips.

Oh well, it's going to have to do. I am off to catch the One Train downtown.

An hour later, as I walk into the holiday party held in Cipriani on Wall Street, I don't see anyone that I was hoping to party with.

I see plenty of kids from various other classes but no sign of Anne, Margaret, Chucky, Ruth, or Nick. It figures that they would all decide to show up fashionably late. They are all probably at the same cool pre-party together.

As I stand there, at the grand entrance all alone, I feel incredibly awkward and vulnerable. I'm the new girl on the first day of school again. This time, not even Natalie is here for me to talk to.

As I glance around the gorgeous, dramatically lit ballroom, I see the other students turn away from me. I notice that they are whispering to each other and pointing out of the corner of my eye.

I know, I committed a faux pas by showing up here tonight. I was found cheating on my boyfriend, the school prince, with my best friend's boyfriend. It was a mistake to come here. As I turn to leave, I hear the sound of someone clearing their throat.

The ballroom is designed beautifully with floor to ceiling Grecian columns, and above me, there is a decorated dome. Rising from the dining room centerpieces is a forest of miniature golden trees. This would have been the perfect night if only I had friends to share it with. As I descend the grand staircase, one step at a time, into the ballroom, all I could think of was Ruth.

I wanted to come here with her, in our matching dresses and tiaras. I wanted to be two princesses of Piotr High, just for one night. I feel my eyes grow hot as I thought about how great this would have been. At the same time, I realize how much I've changed from the girl who once scuffed at girly things and princesses.

There is a band playing an instrumental version of Gordon Lightfoot's "If You Could Read My Mind." Oh, it is such an oddly perfect song to announce my arrival. 

If only the guests of this party knew who I really was, of tales I had woven, of my secret internet life. But they'll never know. For a brief moment, I had a chance to publish my story — to show the world who I truly am, under my real name, using my real face, and it was all taken away.

Natalie took my only chance at showing them who I truly am and so I took her boyfriend. She deserved it. If they only knew the truth, they would applaud me. 

I turn around to see Jake standing in the shadows, on the far right of the stairs.

He's smiling rakishly, like Rhett Butler at the beginning of Gone With the Wind.

He's still not my type, though.

Who is my type? I wonder.

 Is it Nick? Nah. 

There's no time to search my heart. Jake walks up to me, in front of everyone, and offers me his hand. I can't believe Jake cleaned up and found a suit to wear. He's wearing a slick black tie over a black dress shirt. The fading bruise over his eyebrow is the only sign that he was just recently caught in the sidewalk brawl.

"I'm not good at things like this, but, Cori — you wanna dance?"

I glance around the ballroom. Now, every eye is on me. Not a single person let out a sound. I knew they were all thinking — no! She wouldn't dare!

I smile, helplessly, wickedly. Yes, Jake Villin, I will. Let them talk. If only they could read my mind, they would find much more than just a girl who coveted her best friend's boyfriend. In my mind, they would discover WilderLuna15, and that is a secret I don't think any of them can handle.

Yes, I'm not beautiful like Helen of Troy. My gift is not my beauty but my imagination. Maybe I'm not sure if I want to be Jake's girlfriend, but I do know that I love myself, and I love the idea of myself dancing with Jake right then.

I reach out and take Jake's hand. He leads me down into the ballroom, right into the center, under the spotlight.

"Natalie and her friends are probably shooting icicles at us with their eyes," I whisper as Jake pulls me close. His cheek brushes against my temple, and his fingers intertwine around mine. I stare into the fabric of his wool jacket, at the nape of his neck, as we continue to dance. 

This is a magical moment, and I begin to wonder if Jake could be my type.

Jake's breath brushes against my forehead. The music slows down, and we dance even closer.

"I don't care what they think," Jake whispers. "Do you want to dance?"

"I do, a little," I answer, but at the sight of his dreamy eyes, my feelings of uncertainty, drift away. "Nick and I broke up," I whisper into Jake's ear.

"Sorry."

"He just wasn't that crazy about me," I mutter and wipe a tear from my face.

"I can't imagine anyone being anything but absolutely, ridiculously, obsessively, crazy about you," Jake says, and we both stifle a chuckle. "To know you, Corrine Stone is to love you. I know I always will."

As the song finishes, Jake and I take a step back from each other.

"Are you okay?" Jake asks as I suppress a sniffle. "You want me to go beat up Nick's lily-white pansy ass?"

"No," I laugh. "No, you've beat up enough people this week."

"Okay," Jake says and squeezes my hand. "Let me know if you change your mind."

"What do you mean by you always will?"

"I'm leaving. My mom came back from Mykonos, and she's sending me to a boarding school in New Hampshire," Jake laughs and then stares at his feet. "My grandparents, my grandfather especially, were really upset to hear that I nearly got arrested for that fight on Chambers Street. They said this public school thing isn't for me, especially not when they have a library named after them at that fancy name-brand private school that everyone here hates."

"What? Who are your mom's parents? Is your grandfather royalty in East Asia?"

"No, he just made some money in the airline business there. He doesn't care about me because my mom is always off screwing around with her boyfriend and blowing her family fortune. Unfortunately, now he knows I got into serious trouble, and I'm on his radar now."

"Oh, so I see, you're crazy rich too. Expect unlike Nick and Ruth, you're embarrassed about it."

"If I told you, you'll look at me differently. I always liked my dad's side of the family better. They're down-to-earth enough to hold down a job while my mom is always off  on yachts trying to 'find herself.'"

"Oh, trying to find herself, that sounds like a lot like me," I laugh, but Jake doesn't. "We can still hang out sometime, right?"

"Yeah," Jake says with a laugh. "I'll try and find some time while I'm exiled to Preppy Siberia. I might even have to cut my hair and wear a blazer."

"I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," Jake winks at me. "You were worth it, Stone."

I don't know why the thought of losing Jake hurts so much. At least now that he's off to boarding school, Jake can't stalk me anymore. Yet, at the same time, the pain is unbearable. I'm losing the one person at this school who truly understood me, the real me, not the me that I pretended to be.

Some of Jake's friends come to talk to him, and I decide to sneak away before they can give me dirty looks for being the cause of Jake's leaving Piotr. As soon as I enter the dining area, Natalie storms up to me.

"I can't believe you showed your face here," Natalie says. "Don't you know anything, Corrine?"

"Well, now I know why you were all over Jake. You like your boys rich, don't you?"

Natalie scuffs at me. "Don't tell me you didn't know. Are you both blind and deaf?"

"Well, judging by your short stories, that's what you are."

"Did you wonder at all where your popular friends are?"

"No, but I'm sure they'll be here any minute."

"You don't know anything, do you? Jessica Brooks died yesterday."