Picture this, Shelby. You are at home in your room, lying on your bed. It's a little over ten in the evening. You pick up your smart phone and put on a new K-drama. Five last episodes later and you see the sun rising. Fiddlesticks.

Bad habits. These are the unhealthy and addictingly repetitive things that we despicable humans find ourselves doing every now and then. Not so big of a deal right?

Wrong. It is a big deal, a gamechanger if I may. And while we obviously don't need habits of all sorts in order to live, sadly, we also don't avoid them. Look, if you don't think chewing on a million different germs and viruses underneath your fingernails everyday is a problem then congratulations! You've just signed yourself a slow burning death wish.

I wish I was kidding, but no.

Now, Shelby, in order to help you put things into perspective, let me tell you a secret that you and I both know. So here it goes: Most of the time, we, the ones who have bad habits don't even notice that we do. And often times, the people who do notice first are the ones closest to you, but end up not saying a thing to save you from the extra embarrassment. Other times, those who know about your bad habits will gossip away and once word is out I assure you, you'll be the last to know. But let's not wait for those ugly scenarios to happen now, shall we? First things first.

Learn to segregate good traits from the bad.

A habit can take on many forms, even your personality. If so, how do you know which one is which? You don't.
Yes, everything you do is a part of what makes you, well, you. Naturally though, that doesn't mean that there is nothing to get rid of. Simply put, we are not perfect people, and once in a while we will develop unpleasant traits and develop unpleasant habits. But when that time comes, you have to make sure that you ask yourself.

1.) Is this trait or habit, one that correctly and positively impacts my well-being?

2.) Is this trait or habit genuinely beneficial to me and my growth as a person?

3.) Do I need this trait or habit in order to sustain my life?

No matter which, if your answer to even a single one of these questions is no, then without a doubt, you my friend have identified your bad habit.

After reading the above, quite frankly, I imagine a lot of you Wattpad peeps mumbling: "It's not that bad." or "I don't need to force myself to quit." so why bother. Then again, I can see that you've gotten this far into reading.

Why do you think that is?

Bad habits have become your new normal.

Like what life has begun to offer due to the recent pandemic, we are trying hard to accept whatever it is that's coming. We become accustomed to both usual and unusual things and we feel as if they are innate. Sometimes even worse, our habits are disguised as our coping mechanisms. This happens when you slowly begin to think that your entire life and sanity depend on these habits. Don't be fooled, they both don't. Remember this: we only cling to our "safe circles" simply because we can.

Another reason could be because you are blinded and cannot see the risks.

Think of that habit for me, and then, side by side think about your future. Can't see much eh? That's because you are only focused on the present. Years from now that bad habit can destroy you. Stop living in the now and for the sake of only today. Consider every possible risk in the future, before all hell breaks loose.

Every light has its own switch, and in the same way and sense your bad habits have triggers. Allow me to give you a concrete example to help shape your understanding.

Say for instance that your bad habit is stress-eating. So normally, it would be viewed like this: whenever you see a bag of Cheetos lying around, no matter if you're hungry or just tired, your first instinct is to open it and eat it.

Well, what if there were no bag of Cheetos? Same goes for that delish strawberry ice cream in the fridge and that pinned delivery fast food flyer.

Sounds so simple Shelby.

Since you have nothing unhealthy to devour, this lessens the chance of you repeating your bad habit. But not so simple. This requires a lot of drive and self-control. If you want to take it a step higher, I suggest you straight-up avoid the snacks aisle at the supermarket.

And hopefully, once you figure out the cause of these habits you can stop them at their root and from there slowly start to mitigate its effects.

If you can't beat your bad habits, join them.

Replace your bad habits with good ones. This is not something you would find new or amusing, but since this is an old trick from the hat you'd be surprised with how effective it can be. If you haven't noticed, commonly the reason for developing our bad habits in the first place is to distract ourselves from the real world. We do it to escape from boredom, pain, stress, anxiety and the like.

Given that fact, why not replace these habits with similar hormone-inducing activities?

You can get your daily dose of endorphins from an equally engaging "distraction". If you for example are someone who lacks water in your system and instead resorts to soda, try switching between soda and sparkling water/electrolyte drinks (e.g. Gatorade) first. Then, after a two-week adjustment period, try switching to sparkling water and water. Another two weeks and your body will start to look for water more than any other drink. Small amounts of practice can lead to big change, Shelby.

Oh and don't forget to follow solution #1 and ignore the soda aisle!

There are two things that are most essential in accomplishing tasks: your Support system and your Reward system. Breaking your old habits is not any easy feat, so you might as well use all the cards you've got to keep the game going.

One, your support system. I wanted to stress first that this is difficult to say in such an easy way. I am aware that not all of us have inseparable bonds. You are your own support system for goodness sake, and if there's one person who can shake you out of your tiny mess it's no one else, just you. Be proud of yourself and exceed your own expectations.

But for those that could use a little push, ask a few people you trust to steer you out of that chips and soda aisle. Don't hesitate to ask for simple favors such as weekly reminders in order to help you stay on track.

Two, rewards system. Every time you complete a daily task, reward yourself with a little something. Treat yourself to a piece of your favorite candy every day or an ice cream cone every week. But a very big BUT, make sure your rewards don't coincide with your bad habits or create a new one or I will personally push you off of a cliff. That defeats the purpose of this all, man. Kidding with the cliff thing but really, don't cheat yourself, it'll only make you feel worse.

Apply these two things at the end of each day and before you know it you'll be making progress faster than the light of day.

Look, I don't know if those habits of yours were developed at a pretty young age or have only started a few months back, but right now I just want you to know that the time it took doesn't matter, as long as at present there is that voice in your head that's asking you to quit.

And I know for a fact that you're still here because you really want to do something about those habits and that's just the type of voice I'm talking about. So go ahead and fix your broken parts, Shelby. I'll be rooting for you from the sidelines.

I challenge you starting today to break one habit in 30 days. Be it drinking more water or quitting video games, start small and be sure to keep track of your progress every day. And as always, share your experiences in the comments section!

1.) How To Break Bad Habits by Robert Taibbi L.C.S.W.

2.) Bad Habits: Why We Can't Stop by Jeanna Bryner

3.) How to Break a Bad Habit and Replace it with a Good One by James Clear

Hello favorites! This is me reminding you again and again that nothing will be easy at first.

You will take chances, both win and lose them. But there is nothing to be ashamed of for trying because in return no matter the outcome, you grow.

See you, Shelby.

hugs and a better you,
dilagmakata