i belong with you, you belong with me
you're my sweetheart
- the lumineers, "ho hey"

Natsu sighed happily as he and Gray headed back to their bedroom. Sylvie had been delighted by his dramatic rendition of "How the Grinch Stole Christmas," and had insisted on sitting half on Gray, half on Natsu while he read.

After the two of them had tucked her into bed – the younger ones asleep long ago – they had sat in front of the fireplace playing Scattergories with Ultear and Xavier until the logs were merely ash and dying embers. Natsu couldn't remember the last time he had felt so welcomed.

"Your family is perfect," Natsu said as he closed the door quietly behind him. "And I don't think I'm ever going to eat again." His stomach was still full from dinner, Christmas cake, various candies and eggnog.

"I guess I'm going to have to eat all your cinnamon buns tomorrow then," Gray smirked, turning to Natsu and stepping towards him until he was backed against the closed door. Gray leaned forward, resting a palm on the door next to Natsu's head, and Natsu shivered. There was a look in Gray's eyes that made Natsu's legs feel weak.

"Y-you didn't tell me there'd be cinnamon buns," Natsu stuttered. Gray's face was so close. "A-are we picking up where we left off?" Gray gave a half-smile, then his face turned serious.

"I'd like to," he said, his voice low. "But I need to be sure."

"Sure of what?" Natsu asked hesitantly.

"Sure that you want this," Gray replied, reaching up with one hand and drawing his thumb down the side of Natsu's face. "I'm- I don't wanna just mess around. And I'm not the... easiest person to be with."

"I'm sure," Natsu said, turning his face to press a kiss into Gray's palm. "And I'm pretty sure I can handle you." He winked, and Gray made a sort-of growling sound that almost stopped Natsu's heart.

"Good," Gray murmured, then closed the gap between them.

Natsu moaned softly at the kiss, bringing one hand to Gray's hip, and the other hand to tangle in his hair. Gray pushed his thigh in between Natsu's legs, pinning him to the door, and Natsu inhaled sharply at the sensation. They made soft noises in each other's mouths, tasting and teasing and pressing into each other. Natsu's thumb drew circles over Gray's hipbone, then slipped underneath his shirt and began to caress his bare skin.

Gray growled again, moving his hand to the base of Natsu's skull as his kisses became more insistent, more demanding. He gasped into Natsu's mouth, soft ahs and mmms that sent sparks directly to Natsu's groin. Gray was the most enthusiastic person Natsu had ever kissed, and he loved it. Natsu's fingers tightened until he was dragging his nails along the skin at the base of Gray's spine, the other hand tightening in Gray's hair.

"Criss, t'es incroyable," Gray murmured against Natsu's lips, dragging his hand down from Natsu's cheek to trail across his collarbone, running his thumb over the hollow of Natsu's throat. Natsu had no idea what Gray was saying, but the roughness of his voice and the way the words rolled off his tongue were enough to make Natsu tremble.

"Nhhhhnn," Natsu groaned, nipping softly at Gray's lower lip. He ran his fingers along the hem of Gray's shirt questioningly, and there was a moment of hesitation. "It's oka-" Gray broke off the kiss momentarily and helped Natsu pull the sweater off, throwing it to the floor. There was a slight hint of vulnerability in Gray's eyes now, and Natsu wished he could kiss it away. He grabbed the hem of his own shirt and tugged it over his head, then pulled Gray back against him so that their chests were flush.

"Câlice," Gray swore, tipping his head and pressing soft kisses along Natsu's jaw. Gray's hands were on Natsu's hips now, thumbs dipped just below the waist of Natsu's jeans, and Natsu dragged his fingers through Gray's hair again. God, it was soft. Natsu moaned noisily as he felt teeth scrape his skin, then breathed out a laugh as one of Gray's fingers came up to rest on his lips. "Shhh," Gray whispered.

Gray pressed another kiss to Natsu's neck, then leaned back and looked at him, placing his hands on the door on either side of Natsu's head. Natsu swallowed heavily – the look in Gray's eyes was fervent and predatory. Natsu was glad for Gray's thigh in between his legs, otherwise he might have just melted to the ground right then and there.

"You have to be quiet," Gray whispered, a sultry smile on his lips.

Jesus Christ, it should be illegal for someone to have eyes like that, Natsu thought, enraptured by Gray's gaze. He leaned forward, wrapping a hand around the back of Gray's neck and pulling him forward, then catching Gray's bottom lip between his teeth.

"Bed?" Natsu suggested, drifting a hand down Gray's side until he shuddered. Gray stole one more kiss, then backed up slowly, catching Natsu's hand and dragging him back towards the bed in the center of the room. Gray sat down, spreading his legs apart and tugging Natsu towards him.

"C'mere," Gray whispered, leaning forward to press a kiss to the center of Natsu's chest. Natsu shivered, then let out a yelp as Gray pulled him forward and he tumbled down onto the bed. Gray grabbed his hips and flipped him over until he was straddling Natsu's thighs, leaning down over him. The tips of his hair brushed against Natsu's face.

"You're gorgeous," Gray whispered, eyes searching Natsu's face as Natsu shuddered. "I'm so lucky." Gray captured Natsu's lips with his own again, leaning down to rest on one elbow.

"Gray," Natsu whispered, wrapping his arms around Gray's hips and pulling him down onto the bed until they were facing each other. Gray hummed happily against him, their kisses turning soft and lazy. Natsu drifted his hand up and down Gray's chest, hesitating at the edge of the scar on Gray's stomach.

"Mmnnn," Gray murmured, breaking their kiss and leaning back a bit, propping himself up on his elbow. "It's okay. It's just a bit sensitive." Natsu nodded, running his fingers gently over the mark. Gray shuddered. "It feels... strange. But not in a bad way." He reached out and grabbed Natsu's hand, bringing it to his mouth and kissing the knuckles softly. "You're the first person to touch me... since..."

Natsu leaned forward to kiss Gray once more. After a moment, Gray tipped their foreheads together, and they breathed for a moment, hands feeling each other's heartbeats through their skin.

"As much as I would love to continue ravaging you," Gray murmured, "my niece is next door." Natsu laughed, pressing a kiss to the tip of Gray's nose. There was a comfortable silence for a moment, then Gray winced, dropping down onto his stomach.

"Can I help?" Natsu asked. He shifted until he was curled up against Gray, and tugged the blanket up over their legs. The bedside lamp was on, and Natsu could see the scars across Gray's back more clearly now. He traced a finger down one of the messy lines. Gray shivered, but kept his head rested on his arms as Natsu gently touched his scars.

"My therapist says the pain is partly psychosomatic," Gray said quietly. "That I'm holding onto it because of how angry I am."

"Does that mean I get to call you Watson?" Natsu joked, and was glad when Gray laughed softly. "Do you think she's right?"

Gray sighed, and was quiet for a moment.

"Lyon shot me twice in the shoulder," he said eventually. Natsu wasn't sure if he was ignoring the question, or answering around it. "My scapula was shattered in three places. They had to do surgery on it a few times, but had to wait until the soft tissue was healed first. That's the big lines, from the surgery." Natsu traced the edge of one of them with his finger. "There were bone fragments everywhere, I guess, so they had to go clean those out. I don't remember much. I was pretty drugged up for the first bit."

Natsu made a soft sound but didn't say anything. He wasn't sure what he could say. Now that he was closer, he could see that it wasn't really a spiderweb after all, but several large, oddly-shaped scars from where the bullets had left Gray's body.

"I guess I was super unlucky because in addition to that there was 'significant nerve damage,'" Gray continued, making quotation marks with his fingers. "I started physio back in... March, I think? It's awful. I hate it. Trying so hard to just squeeze a stupid ball and willing my fucking hand to work and it just wouldn't and then the pain would come like someone was putting a hot iron on my shoulder or something. It hurt so fucking bad."

"Jesus," Natsu whispered, continuing to run his fingers over the damaged parts of Gray's skin. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that."

"I still do," Gray mumbled, burying his head in his arms. "I mean, it's not as bad anymore. I can use my arm most of the time. But I still go physio every couple weeks, and see a neurologist. I take those meds for the pain." He sighed. "The one down there wasn't as bad. It didn't really go through." He gestured to the scar on the edge of his stomach.

"I'm sorry," Natsu said again, not knowing what else to say. He wished he could shoulder some of the pain and frustration for Gray.

"Ultear says I died in the ambulance," Gray said quietly. Natsu recalled his bizarre dream from the hospital, looking at the stars with someone who wasn't Gray. "I don't remember it. I just remember... he pulled out the gun..." Gray faltered, and Natsu spread a hand out over his lower back comfortingly. "And it just hurt so badly, and then I woke up in the hospital. Ultear says that Lyon was the one who called 9-1-1. And... he turned himself in. I don't know why."

"Did you have to, like, go to court and... testify or something?" Natsu asked. Gray shook his head.

"He plead guilty. And it wasn't his first offense." Gray sighed again. "He'd been arrested for assault with a weapon and drug possession before. This was his first attempted murder though." Gray's voice was sharp and sarcastic.

"I wish I could make it better," Natsu whispered, and Gray turned to look at him, smiling softly.

"You already have," he murmured, cheeks dusted pink. "I was so sad, and so angry, and felt so alone for so long. I know I have Ultear and everyone, but..." Natsu could hear Gray's voice becoming rough. "I still am. Angry, I mean. And sad, sometimes." Gray took a shaky breath.

"But you're not alone," Natsu said, leaning down and pressing a kiss to the center of one of the scars. Gray's breath hitched, and then he was crying again, covering his face with his hands. "Gray, hey, it's okay," Natsu said softly. He lay down on his side and pulled Gray towards him until his chin rested on Gray's head. Gray buried his face in Natsu's chest.

"I'm sorry," Gray whispered. "'m such a fuckin' mess." Natsu shook his head. He had a feeling that Gray hadn't grieved yet, had been keeping this all buried under layers of anger and sharpness and pushing people away. Natsu was almost certain that today was the first time Gray had let himself cry about this.

"It's okay," Natsu murmured, stroking Gray's hair. "I can take it." He wrapped his arms tightly around Gray's trembling shoulders and continued to whisper in his ear. "Let it out... you're safe... I've got you."

After several minutes, Gray's quiet sobs faded away, and he pulled back from Natsu, rubbing his eyes and looking flustered. Natsu brushed Gray's hair out of his eyes, smiling gently.

"What were you saying to me earlier?" he asked, trying to distract Gray. It worked perfectly, if the flush on Gray's cheeks was anything to go by.

"Uh, I..." Gray chewed on his lip. Natsu raised an eyebrow.

"I mean, you can tell me anything you want and I'd have to believe it," Natsu said, then grinned. "Until I ask Ultear tomorrow what 'criss, t'es incroyable' means." Gray's face immediately flushed red, and he looked up at Natsu in amazement.

"How did you..."

"When you whisper something that seductively in my ear, it's hard to forget," Natsu reasoned. He laid back on the pillow and reached his arm out, pulling Gray down lay on his chest. Gray draped his arm over Natsu's stomach, then tangled their legs together until they were both snug under the blanket.

"It means 'damn, you're incredible,'" Gray murmured after a moment. Natsu reached over and flicked off the light, sighing at the comfortable weight around him.

"Mmm, well, the feeling is mutual," he said softly. "When we get home..." His voice trailed off, suddenly feeling uncertain about calling Gray's apartment home. Even if they had this... thing between them now, would that mean he could stay, after his birthday?

"I'm looking forward to it," Gray mumbled, interrupting Natsu's train of thought. "And I'm totally eating all your cinnamon buns tomorrow."

__________

"Uncle Gray! Na'su! Joyeaux Noël!"

Natsu groaned as he felt a weight on his legs, and opened his eyes blearily to see Sylvie sitting there, practically thrumming with excitement. Gray was still draped across his chest, seemingly unfazed by the interruption, and they were both still shirtless.

"G'morning, Miss Sylvie," Natsu said softly, nudging Gray to wake up. "We'll be right out, okay?" Sylvie leaped off the bed and ran out the door, leaving it wide open. "Wake up, Snowflake." Natsu gently pushed Gray off of him, then sat up and yawned.

"Wha's time?" Gray asked sleepily, squinting at the clock across the room. Natsu leaned over to the bedside table and passed Gray his glasses.

"Seven-thirty," he replied, grinning as Gray sat up slowly and pushed his glasses up his nose. "Merry Christmas, you dork." Gray grumbled something unintelligible, but didn't argue when Natsu kissed him. "Sylvie's practically going to explode, we'd better get up."

Christmas morning with Gray's family turned out to be exactly everything Natsu had ever wanted. Xavier had, indeed, baked enough cinnamon buns to feed a small village, so both Natsu and Gray had plenty – even if Gray kept stealing the raisins off Natsu's plate. Sylvie was a whirlwind of excitement, bringing everyone their stockings and then plopping herself into Natsu's lap like she belonged there.

"Elsa a Jedi," she said solemnly, showing Natsu the two dolls in her lap. The one on the left was well-loved, with a makeshift lightsaber taped to its hand. The one on the right was clearly a recently-opened gift.

"Elsa would be a great Jedi," Natsu replied, keeping his face serious. He could see Gray smiling at him out of the corner of his eye, and he reached over, resting his fingers across Gray's under the piles of wrapping paper. When he realized that Ultear and Xavier had gone back to the kitchen to get coffee, he leaned over and pressed a quick kiss to Gray's cheek. He wasn't sure yet how Gray felt about his family knowing about them.

"This one Rey," Sylvie continued, pointing to the new doll. "Her fight mechants."

"Bad guys," Gray translated when Natsu looked at him, puzzled.

"Does she fight Kylo Ren?" Natsu asked, and Sylvie bounced on his lap.

"Yeah! Elsa do pzzzzzzzct-" here she did an excellent imitation of someone shooting lightning from their hands "-an' Rey do bonk bonk bonk." She swung the doll in the air to emphasize her point and Natsu laughed out loud. Then Sylvie turned to Natsu and looked at him seriously. "Uncle Gray sing Frozen."

"Oh, he does, does he?" Natsu replied, tone light and teasing. Gray groaned, and Natsu turned to see Gray covering his face in embarrassment.

"Il est temps d'appeler grand-maman et grand-papa!" Ultear's voice cut through Gray's chagrin, and she set down a laptop on the table as Xavier passed Gray and Natsu their coffee. Sylvie scooted forward, and Gray leaned over to Natsu and nudged him.

"My grandparents don't speak much English, sorry," he whispered in Natsu's ear. "I'll translate for you." Natsu nodded, feeling incredibly nervous all of a sudden.

"Bonjour!" An elderly couple with graying hair popped up on the screen, along with a stern-looking woman in her mid-forties that Natsu immediately recognized as Ophélie, Gray's aunt and CEO of Tempête. "Joyeaux Noël!"

Sylvie and Renaud immediately started showing off their presents, so it wasn't until a minute or so later that Natsu and Gray were finally able to say hello.

"Allo, Joyeaux Noël!" Gray said, smiling, then gestured to Natsu. "Voici mon-" Suddenly Sylvie's tiny voice interrupted him.

"Natsu Gray chum!" she declared, and Gray froze. Natsu looked over at him, puzzled.

"Um," was Gray's only response.

"Il donné un bec," Sylvie added, and Gray groaned.

"What's going on?" Natsu whispered, tugging on Gray's sleeve. Gray hesitated for a second, and Natsu realized that everyone was now staring at them.

"Chum means, um, boyfriend," Gray explained quietly, cheeks pink. "She's... I don't even know where she learned that word. Apparently, she saw us kissing." Natsu flushed for a moment too, then reached over and grabbed Gray's hand.

"I'm okay being out if you are," Natsu said, and Gray looked up at him, uncertain. "Do we have to make it official before we tell people?" Gray snorted, and Natsu squeezed his hand. "Gray, do you want to be my boyfriend?"

"You know I do, you idiot," Gray replied fondly, then turned back to his grandparents. "Oui, c'est mon chum, Natsu." Natsu could see Ultear smiling softly at Gray. Gray's grand-papa looked confused for a moment, then shrugged and nodded his head.

"Je savais pas qu't'étais gai," he said cheerfully, then waved at Natsu, who waved back hesitantly. "Il ne parle pas français?" Gray shook his head. "Welcome, Natsu!" Gray's grand-papa's English was heavily accented. "Merry Christmas! I'm sure you make Gray very happy. Be good to him."

"I will," Natsu said quietly, feeling his face flush bright red. Gray squeezed Natsu's hand, and when Natsu turned to look at him, Gray leaned in and kissed him. Just once, soft and gentle, but enough to make Natsu feel like everything important in the world belonged to him.

__________

French Translations

Criss, t'es incroyable = Damn, you're amazing
Joyeaux Noël = Merry Christmas
Il est temps d'appeler grandmaman et grandpapa = It's time to call grandma and grandpa
Voici mon... = This is my...
Natsu Gray chum = Natsu Gray boyfriend (toddler speak)
Il donné un bec = He gave a kiss
Oui, c'est mon chum, Natsu = Yes, this is my boyfriend, Natsu
Je savais pas qu't'étais gai = I didn't know you were gay
Il ne parle pas français? = He doesn't speak French?