Above is sorta what I imagined, plus the moon. :3

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A few days passed and inevitably with them, another relapse with the building up of cabin fever in both the occupants of the apartment, particularly the teenager. On a positive note, Eren deemed Levi's cuts healed enough to remove the bandages for good, but that was the only thing to speak for.

Presently, Eren wandered aimlessly and restlessly around, looking for things to keep his hands occupied, but to no avail. Levi resided on the couch, the only noise being the scratching of his pencil across the paper of his sketchbook. Eventually, his fist closed around the utensil and his eyes darted up to the teen who was, once again, rounding the corner from the kitchen.

"Would you sit the hell down, Jaeger? You're making me dizzy."

Eren huffed as he plopped down onto the opposite couch, mumbling an apology. He glanced almost longingly toward the window where the sun was sinking lower in the sky.

"You don't have to be here, you know," Levi murmured in a much softer tone. He kept his gray eyes fixed on whatever he was drawing and continued to sketch as he spoke.

Eren remained quiet. Of course he knew that, but there was still no way he was about to abandon Levi. He had the feeling the raven was close to his breaking point, close to deciding he needed and wanted more help than what Eren could offer.

"Such a stubborn brat," he said under his breath.

Eren merely sent him a semi smug half grin, which he softly tch-ed at and transferred his focus back to the page in front of him.

Eren fidgeted with his shirt as he stared absently out the window and let his thoughts wander.

"I have an idea," he said a while after Levi had set his sketchbook down and curled up into a ball, staring at nothing while his body shook. He raised a questioning brow. "I think it would do us both some good to get out of here for a while," Eren continued. "I know where we can go. It's nowhere public or anything, if you're up for it."

"Where?"

"I'll leave it a surprise."

Levi shoved himself into a sitting position. "Let's go, then."

Eren blinked in mild surprise. "Seriously?"

"I'm just as tired of sitting around here as you are."

Not ten minutes later, they were descending the stairs toward the parking lot. The weather had warmed up considerably from the winter storms and the last of the snow had melted. The air was still slightly chilly, but really nothing they couldn't handle.

Stepping away from that building almost immediately gave Eren the sense of freedom. He pointed his nose upward and inhaled the fresh air, enjoying the way it expanded his lungs and eased his cabin fever.

By the time they made it to the car and got in, Levi's trembling had kicked up vigorously and he fumbled to shut the door. Observing this, Eren said, "Maybe this isn't such a good idea..."

"I'm fine," insisted the raven. "I can handle it."

"Okay, but if it gets to be too much..."

"Just drive, Eren."

Swiftly, Eren complied, shoving his keys into the ignition and twisting. The car sparked to life and he revved it a few times to help warm it up.

In truth, Levi wasn't sure he could handle this. Merely walking down the stairs had him winded and his muscles twitching uncomfortably. But he hadn't missed the blissful look on Eren's face as soon as he took a breath of the fresh air. He had no intention of ruining the little bit of happiness Eren had found, whether he could handle it or not. He would force himself to endure it no matter what.

As Eren backed out of the parking space, Levi slid something from the pouch of his hoodie, opened it, and slid the shiny compact disc smoothly into the player without Eren's consent. Eren opened his mouth to ask what it was but as soon as the first note of the song sounded from the speakers, stopped himself. It was his Christmas gift to Levi.

The raven skipped ahead to track six and turned the volume up before gazing out the window as the last of the sun rays disappeared, listening intently.

'I'm not dead, just floating...

I'm not scared, just changing. Right beyond the cigarette and the devilish smile, you're my crack of sunlight...'

The lyrics hit him again, swam through his veins and nestled themselves into a home in his bones. They weren't the lyrics he'd related to most in his life, but they sparked a great meaning within his soul. They were true. He was the one with the cigarette and the devilish smile, and Eren himself was that crack of sunlight, chasing his darkness away word by word, action by action. The longer he remained in the raven's life, the more light he shined into it. To Levi's eyes, so accustomed to the darkness, he'd been too bright at first, too warm. But as eyes do, Levi was adjusting, becoming more comfortable with the idea of living in the light provided by Eren who seemed to be his own personal sun, or perhaps his own personal moon.

'No, that's too selfish,' he thought. He was like the sun or the moon, or something coexisting as an easy medium in between, but he wasn't Levi's. He had no right to call this beautiful teenager any kind of possession or closer relation to him no matter what he did or what kind of urges he'd had. Sure, maybe Eren had feelings for him - feelings he knew he'd never fully understand even if they ended up spending their entire lives together (what a far-fetched idea) - and perhaps his feelings were reflected, despite knowing and having been told thousands of times he shouldn't be allowed to carry such emotions. Eren was much too good for him. Crack of sunlight or not, he'd never be worthy of it.

Balling one hand into a fist, the raven reached out with the other and tapped the next button up to track twelve where he'd last left off. It started with an easy acoustic and didn't pick up much from there, but it was a pleasant song. He found his fingers tapping gently against his thigh to the beat. A slight movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention; he turned to find Eren mouthing along to the words as he focused on the road, pulling onto the highway. Briefly, he wondered how Eren's voice itself might sound, gently singing along to those lyrics, but he wasn't about to open his own mouth and ask him to sing.

As one song ended and the next began, Levi gazed out the window at the passing city lights. He was vaguely aware they were headed north but still hadn't the slightest idea where they were headed.

'I've lost control and I don't want it back; I'm going numb, I've been hijacked.'

'Shitty, clever, stupid, annoying, beautiful brat,' he thought bitterly, squeezing his eyes shut and listening.

'I taste you on my lips and I can't get rid of you. So I say damn your kiss and the awful things you do. Yeah you're worse than nicotine, nicotine...'

'Ridiculous, accurate metaphors...'

One thing he knew was that Eren had put together this collection of songs before Christmas, therefore before he knew of Levi's damnation. Yet somehow in these songs, it was as if he subconsciously knew. He said they were just songs he listened to when he'd gone through his own rough patch, but Eren wasn't an addict. He didn't smoke. It was almost disturbing how accurate it all was...

'I wanna hide the truth, I wanna shelter you, but with the beast inside, there's nowhere we can hide...'

This song had tears forming in the corners of Levi's eyes. His hand rose to his face to hide them.

'Don't get too close, it's dark inside. It's where my demons hide, it's where my demons hide...

Don't wanna let you down but I am hell bound, oh this is all for you, don't wanna hide the truth.'

Levi resisted the urge to pull his knees up and hide himself there. He felt so small under the weight of those lyrics, so vulnerable yet immensely evil. Yes, he had his demons, his skeletons, his monster. He himself felt like a demon, a monster.

"Not everything you touch becomes tainted, Levi. That includes me."

After the tainted life he's lived, he had trouble believing that. Nothing good ever stayed in his life for long and he blamed himself every time for the loss of friends, of his family, of even the smallest things. He knew it was only a matter of time before Eren was gone, too. He'd just been extensively selfish to keep the brat there. Sure, Eren was there partially by his own free will, but Levi had the power to kick him out at any time, to insist that he leave because he knew being there and merely breathing the same air would hurt the bright-eyed teenager more than it would ever do anything good for him.

Eren was the most selfless person he'd ever met. He'd sacrificed so much for Levi. Because he believed in him. Because he cared. Because he loved him. And there Levi was, sucking the life out of him like a leech and never giving a damned thing back.

'Your eyes, they shine so bright, I wanna save that light. I can't escape this now, unless you show me how.'

True. Scarily accurate. Levi knew he had no right to save that light. Had no right to exist within or anywhere near it. Yet he did, selfishly, sucking it away from Eren in the process and furthering his damnation.

Abruptly, the music stopped. Levi slowly lowered his hand and glanced at the teen, whose finger rested on the pause button.

"What's wrong? Do you need me to pull over?"

Swallowing hard, Levi said, "No."

"Then what is it?"

Levi considered his answer before responding. "I'm scared, admittedly." He kept his eyes averted from the brunet, fists clenched tight in his pocket pressed against his hollow stomach. The shaking and aching were nothing then; it was his emotions getting the better of him.

"Of what? Am I driving too fast?"

The raven snorted. "You drive slow compared to me, so no. But never mind. Forget I said anything."

"Tell me," Eren insisted. "I want to help."

All at once, Levi's eyes slammed shut, his gut twisted and his heart sped up just slightly.

"I'm selfish," he muttered. "I'm just trying my best not to hurt you more than I already have..."

"Not telling me what's wrong hurts more than anything, Levi. I just wanna help. Really."

And suddenly like so many times back at the shop, Levi's words were spilling out before he consciously made the decision to let them.

"I'm scared of a lot of things, Eren. Death. Ending up alone. Huge crowds and small, enclosed spaces. The future. Love. Right now I'm terrified because four of those five things are looming right over me and there's nothing I can do about it. What's worse is that despite the fact that I'm scared, I'm fascinated at the same time. Almost like I enjoy being afraid. Tch."

Eren pulled off the highway and went down a road Levi would've missed altogether as it was concealed by darkness.

"It's normal to be afraid," he said calmly. "Everyone has fears. You're no exception."

"Yeah, but who in their right mind likes being afraid?"

Eren seemed to struggle with that. Before he came up with a response, Levi continued.

"You wanna know what I'm most afraid of?"

"Yes."

"Losing you."

The words were so softly spoken, Eren wasn't totally sure he heard them correctly at first. But slowly, they sunk in. Goosebumps rose on his arms as he realized what they meant, how significant they were to him. He remembered Alex's words from the other night, how she said Levi trusted him and even seemed to accept his feelings. How Levi never really trusted anyone and had been alone most of his life and...

Oh...

Oh...

Slowly, the car came to a stop. Eren stared blankly at the road ahead of him, lit only by the headlights. His heart pounded against his ribs. It was suddenly hard to swallow.

"This is a surprise?" muttered Levi, peering out the windshield at the dark, empty fields around them. They were only a few miles from the city; the lights were still visible. The only difference was a few more stars could be seen than normal. "Tch."

"You don't have to be scared of that, Levi," Eren murmured, his voice wavering a bit from the tears he fought desperately to hold back. "I'm not going anywhere."

The raven relaxed in his seat. "And that makes you a fool. Besides, most people say that but eventually they get tired of me or they die. It's hard to believe after being screwed over so many times."

"Then I'll prove it. I will. Whatever it takes. I don't care how stupid it makes me or if I go down with you or whatever you think might happen. But I'm not moving. As long as you want me here, I'm here."

Levi gazed unblinking at the teenager, a warmth from an unknown source radiating through his body. So human. So foreign. So addictive.

"Do you...do you enjoy being afraid of losing me?" Eren whispered.

"N-No. You're the only reason I have to keep breathing...and truthfully I don't want to suffocate."

Finally, Eren met Levi's gaze in the darkness, a soft, fond smile gracing his features. "I'll keep you breathing, then. That's all I want, anyway."

"I'll never understand that about you, brat."

Eren's smile remained as he put the car in motion again, a smile Levi couldn't avert his eyes from.

"I think one day you will," he murmured.

As they continued away from the burning city lights, Eren couldn't help but feel uplifted once again. It wasn't that he'd lost hope, but that he feared Levi would never find it. But in just those simple words -'and truthfully I don't want to suffocate' - was the revealing that he was beginning to find that hope. He might not have known it to be hope, but it was a definite step. It felt incredible to be the reason for it but still Eren remained humble.

"Where are we going?" Levi asked after a while. The lights of the city behind them were almost out of sight and they hadn't seen another car for miles.

"We're almost there," promised the brunet. He revealed nothing more.

Levi sighed. The further they went, the more the stars became visible. It was an impeccably clear night for being winter. The moon was making its appearance from the horizon dead ahead. It was nearly full and the higher it rose, the brighter it shone across the field of what simply looked like grass all around.

Eventually, Eren came to a stop and put the car in park before cutting the engine and the last of the visible manmade light. The city had completely disappeared behind them. All that was left was the enormous field and the sky, vast and alive with countless constellations and what almost looked like nebulae.

"We're here," announced the teen. "Come on."

With that, he opened the door and stepped out. Levi was still shakily fumbling with his seatbelt by the time Eren made it around the car and opened the door. He helped the raven, who stumbled blindly with wobbly knees.

"The middle of nowhere, huh? Nice..."

Eren chuckled. "Not quite. Are you okay to walk a little?"

"I guess."

"Then follow me."

Knowing he needed the extra support anyway, Eren offered his arm to the shorter male and let him hold on as he began to walk away from the car and up a hill that had been impossible to see in the darkness. By the time they reached the top, Levi's lungs were burning mercilessly, his legs ready to give out. Eren helped him sit atop the surprisingly luscious grass and let him catch his breath.

"How is this any less the middle of nowhere?" asked Levi as Eren took a seat as well.

He said but two words. "Look up."

Look up Levi did and nearly had the wind knocked right back out of him at the breathtaking sight his eyes took in.

Stars. Hundreds of thousands of stars, scattered across the night sky, lighting it up to a soft, dark sapphire in place of the usual grayish he was accustomed to. They twinkled and danced, captivating him, drawing him in. The sight was consuming; he stared and stared for several long moments, unblinking and unmoving. There were no words to describe the humbling beauty. He felt small and insignificant but so connected at the same time. Crickets chirped nearby, nestled in hiding spots among the grass; an owl hooted somewhere within earshot. Aside from that, all was silent. A light breeze blew through, lifting his hair and filling his lungs easier than they'd been filled in weeks. Still, he shivered.

"Here, I think I have a blanket in the trunk," Eren murmured, breaking Levi from his reverie. The clanking of keys seemed abnormally loud and Levi could hear the squish of the grass beneath his feet all the way to the car, the sound of the trunk opening and closing, and his footsteps as he returned.

"What do you think?" he asked, wrapping the blanket securely around Levi's shoulders.

"I have no words," murmured Levi, tilting his face back up and wrapping his slender fingers around the edges of the soft fabric. The blanket still held some warmth from the car and did well to keep the chill to a minimum.

Eren sat. "I'm not surprised." He, too, gazed serenely up at the infinite sky. "I've been here several times and it still amazes me."

"How did you know about this?"

"My dad brought me here a few times when I was little." A hint of sadness weighed in Eren's voice alone and looking over, Levi noted the sadness in his eyes. "It was something he and I shared before he died, and then when he passed I came a few more times alone, but I don't know why. Maybe to remember him. It was never the same, but I think it does help me remember better who he was before his addiction took over his life beyond repair. I like to remember the constellations, too. He bought a book of astronomy and we found them together." Eren lifted his finger off to the right and traced a line Levi's eyes didn't quite catch. "Pisces." His finger changed position. "Cancer. Scorpio. Leo. Aquarius. Sagittarius. And my astrological sign, Aries." Levi didn't really pick up what he pointed at. They just looked like random dots to him, but he let Eren explain nonetheless just to hear his voice. "What's your sign?" Eren asked.

"Capricorn."

Eren peered upward, craned his neck back. "I always had trouble finding that one," he murmured. Suddenly, he stopped mid-search and stared at Levi with an expression of realization. "Capricorn just passed. When's your birthday?"

Levi's eyes darted away from Eren's. "December 25th," he answered flatly.

Eren froze. The memory of the last 25th of December flashed through his mind at blinding speed. His chest felt suddenly tight.

"Oh my god, Levi..."

"Don't worry about it, Eren. I've had worse birthdays. It was my fault, anyway."

"But I-"

"No. Please just don't go there, alright? It's done. It doesn't matter anymore." Eager to change the subject, Levi trailed his eyes back to the stars. "Show me more constellations."

Eren attempted to force the lump in his throat away and looked up as well. "The first one I ever learned was The Little Dipper." Eren's finger trailed off to the left. "The North Star is part of it. And it's also called Ursa Minor, but when I was six I didn't care about that." Levi's eyes followed Eren's finger and somehow, he managed to make out the constellation. "And um, did you know that Venus is the second brightest object in the night sky on Earth, besides the moon?" His focus came back to the center where the moon was still making its ascent. A ways off from it was the brightest star there. "See it?"

Levi nodded and then muttered, "You really are a nerd."

Eren stuck his lower lip out in a mock pout. The silvery light of the moon and a few of the stars reflected brilliantly in his turquoise irises. This was more breathtaking than the sky itself and Levi's heart fluttered in some foreign emotion meant solely for Eren. Before he did something stupid like lean forward and trap that lip between his teeth (though it was practically begging for it by the way it stuck out at him), he shut his eyes and fidgeted awkwardly.

"You didn't have to bring me here, you know," he said quietly. "If this was something you shared with your dad, I don't want to take that away from you."

"You aren't taking anything away from me. I wanted to share this with you."

Levi peeped an eye open. Eren's soft features personified the genuineness of his words. The artist let his other eye slide open and for a split second, something shot through him, looking at the beautiful, shitty face of this bratty teenager who so stubbornly insisted upon saving him. Much like the vast universe existing above his head, words were feeble in describing what it was. All he knew was that it resembled love.

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This, and the next, are two of my favorite chapters out of this whole fic. Because of that, I'll probably post the next one, like, tomorrow, because why not? Haha.

In the meantime, let me know what you think <3