Guys, I think I'm cursed. Everything I eat... it all turns into *shit*.
There was a kid named John Shit

Cursed boy, always hated his own name, whole life suffering bullying from everyone...

When turned 18 he was decided to change his name so he opened a process and headed to the judge:

- So, Mr John Shit, you want to change your name, right?
- Yes sir
- And how do you want to be called from now?
- James Shit

A kid had a problem with excessive cursing...

A kid was constantly getting punished for excessive cursing.

The parents were trying everything to get him to stop. One punishment was that if he was at a friend's and he cursed, the friend's parents were told to send him home no questions asked.

He had been good for a bit so one day his parents allowed him to go to a friend's birthday party. They reminded him of the rule.

Well, the kid was gone just long enough to basically walk to the friend's house and walk back home.

The mom saw him come in and immediately spanked him with no hesitation and sent him to his room saying, "You'll have to explain to your father what happened when he comes home."

Later that night, Dad comes home and asks the son, "What happened today? Why did you get sent home? Be completely honest."

The kid said, "The fucking party is tomorrow!"

here you go you cursed beings. Have fun with the rest of your life