Chapter 13 sometimes cowboys cry

Troy took a walk to the beach to think. He needed to figure out how to ask Charlene to marry him because he wanted to ask her while her sister and cousin were here to witness it. He knew that the separation during his next assignment would be difficult but if anyone could tough it out, Charlene was the woman to do it with him. He had never met someone so strong and brave. There were a few people on the beach, but to his surprise he noticed a familiar person lay on the sand.

"Hey, Meri," he called out as he walked toward her. When she didn't respond he shouted over the wind, "Meredith?"

He bent over her and shook her. She had a knot on the side of her head and blood dripping from her hairline onto a rock.

He texted Charlene: Meri collapsed at the beach. She's hurt. Come now!

He called 9-1-1 telling them where he was and checked her for other injuries. "Come on, Meri, wake up."

Startling him, Char panted as she dropped to her knees next to her sister. "Meri!"

Trina shoved her out of the way. "Move! Let me do my job." Trina opened a first aid bag that looked like something a paramedic would have. She cleansed the wound while a wrist cuff took Meri's blood pressure and pulse.

"Wipe off her finger," she handed an alcohol swab to Charlene. Scowling, Trina took out a blood glucose monitor, strips, and a lancet. Pricking Meri's finger, Trina dabbed the blood on a strip and waited the forever for the number to show up. In the distance, they could hear the ambulance. The monitor read 562.

"She needs insulin right now or she could slip into a diabetic coma and we'll lose her." Trina shoved her things in the bag. "Can you carry her? We need to meet the ambulance."

Troy picked up Meri and jogged with Trina. Charlene sat frozen in shock for a moment. All her training, all her therapy, all her coping skills went out the window as she stared at the rock with Meri's blood on it. The wail of the ambulance overcame the laughing cries of the seagulls and Char picked up her sister's phone then sprinted to catch up.

Trina was rapidly talking to the Paramedic as she started the I.V. on Meri. He looked at her glucose monitor reading then did the test again. "It's gone up twenty. Dave! Drive." He glanced between Trina and Char. "Only one of you can go."

Char nodded and helped Troy close the doors. Standing side by side, they watched the ambulance speed away. Char suddenly choked as she started sobbing. Only Troys strong arms kept her from collapsing. He murmured soothing things into her hair that she didn't hear as he guided her to her SUV. He left her to get the keys and the small bag she carried, and Meri's purse. Together, they drove to the hospital. When he came around to open the door, Char unfastened her seatbelt then noticed a velvet box on the driver's seat. Picking it up, she opened it. A blue stone surrounded in a halo of white diamonds set in white gold rested in the pale gray satin lining.

"What is this?" Her tearful, dark eyes glistened as she stared at it.

"I... uhm... That's for asking you later." Troy pulled off his ever-present baseball cap and rubbed his crew cut nervously."You don't have to think about it now. Meri is inside, let's..."

She lunged out of the seat at him, and he staggered back into the car beside them as she kissed him. Panting from the kiss, she pulled his forehead down to touch hers. Neither spoke as she nodded her head.

Pressing the box in his hand, she whispered, "You know my answer, but I want Meri to see you ask and put the ring on my finger."

"As you wish." He grinned as she scoffed and pulled away.

"You and that movie..." The phone in her pocket vibrated. Pulling it out, Char typed the unlock code and frowned when she saw the last number called. "When she started to faint, she called Colt instead of me."Licking her teeth, Char clicked her tongue loudly then she hit redial.

A cheerful woman answered, "Lazy K Ranch, this is Leighanne."

"Hello Leighanne. Are you Colt's new tramp or are you with his brother?" Char tried not to snarl but she was certain she sounded like a Karen.

"Uhm, I'm their sister... Who is this?"

"I'm Charlene DeBois, Meri's sister. I need to talk..."

"Omigawd... Do not hang up! We have been trying to find your sister for months... Dad! This is Leigh, over." The girl started talking almost too fast for Char to follow.

Char heard a radio squawk, "Go ahead, over."

"Send Colt back to the ranch office now. It's about Meri. Over." Leighanne sounded breathless as she begged Char, "Please... please tell me where she is. Colt misses her so much."

Char gritted her teeth then asked, "Did his girlfriend leave him?"

"Girlfriend? What are you talking about?"

"Meri called and she answered the phone," Char insisted.

"Sister-in-law to sister-in-law, I swear Colt never cheated on Meri. He didn't even file the divorce papers she sent. He went to Vegas, but she had moved away. Please... My brother loves your sister." Leighanne clutched at her late mother's cross around her neck, praying she wasn't lying.

"Charlene, come inside!" Trina shouted across the parking lot.

"Look, Meri is in the hospital. She's having problems with her pregnancy. We are in San Diego. Call me when you get to town, and I'll give you directions. I have to go talk to the doctors. Bye."

"We'll be there as quickly as we can," Leighanne promised. "Bye."

Going inside, Char found out Meri was admitted to a room already because her blood pressure was abnormal. Trina told them the doctors were hopeful Meri's condition could be managed well with daily insulin. Then the alarms started going off in Meri's rooms and the nurses and doctors rushed in, leaving Char, Trina, and Troy to be ushered into a waiting room.

~~~~

Leighanne King sat back in the office chair after scribbling Charlene DuBois number down and putting it in her cellphone. She hated that there was no cell signal at the ranch house, but the houses and barns sat in the center of thirty square miles of semi-arid West Texas hill country.

Hearing the jeep speeding toward the homestead, she stormed outside to give her brother a piece of her mind. The hot, dry Texas morning did nothing to relax her agitation. The thirty-minute wait for them had set her tempter off like a wildfire as she went over everything Charlene had said and ask. Standing on the porch with her arms crossed, she bounced her heel in agitation.

"You are a jerk, Colton King! The biggest jerk on the planet!" Leighanne shouted at him, as she pointed an accusing finger at him.

Colt and their father stared at her in confusion. Cordell asked, "Leigh, what's going on?"

"My brother is a danged fool who almost cost me a sister and a chance to be an aunt because he couldn't swallow his pride and call his wife," Leighanne accused as she stomped down the steps and across the packed gravel to poke him in the chest. "You will buy her flowers and grovel on your knees. You will do anything she wants to make things right or so help me gawd, I am going to tie you buck-naked behind one of the bulls and chase it through a prickly pear patch!"

"What are you talking about?" Colt grabbed her wrist because her finger felt like it was drilling a hole in his chest.

"Charlene called because Meri is in the hospital. She is having problems with her pregnancy. Why didn't you tell me I was going to be an aunt?"

Colt staggered against the jeep, gawking at her. "I... I didn't know. She never told me."

"How could she tell you if you never called? She thinks you have a girlfriend!" Leighanne looked enraged. "Some girl answered your phone. Did you cheat on my sister-in-law?!"

He shook his head in denial. "I never cheated on Meri."

"But you never called her either." Leighanne looked like she was about to punch him.

Cordell shook his head, then asked, "What did Charlene say?"

"She is at the hospital because Meri is having a problem pregnancy," Leighanne repeated. "She said call her when we get there." Leighanne put her fists on her hips. "Get packing, big brother, we have a long drive." She turned on her heel and went to the main house.

Colt looked at Cordell, repeating, "I didn't know."

The look of disappointment in his father's eyes was too much to bear, so he walked away after his sister with his head down. He had achieved his dream of becoming the National Cutting Horse champion at the cost of everything else of value in his life. Even his horse had shown more love and loyalty for his wife than he had. Colt had spent months trying to bribe Sam with oatmeal cookies, but Sinner Sam I Am refused to eat his favorite treat since having Meredith's. Going into his bedroom, he heard Leighanne cursing him from her room, and she wasn't quiet about it. Pulling a couple pairs of clean denim jeans, and the same number of socks, underwear, and teeshirts out of the dresser he tossed them in his suitcase. The shampoo, bodywash, and deodorant were still in the clear, sealable travel bag he kept them in when on the road. He picked his three nicest shirts from the closet and a suit jacket.

"Don't forget to pack your sneakers and church boots," Leighanne scolded, "And take a damned shower. You smell like the herd and Sam. I ain't spending the next sixteen hours in the truck with you stinking like you do now."

Sighing, Colt bowed his head, "Leigh, I'm sorry. I didn't know."

Glaring at him like she wanted to slap him, she turned around and walked away. From down the hall, she called out, "I am packing sandwiches for the road. We ain't stopping for nothing, but gas and bathroom breaks until we get there."

~~~~

Meri felt like she had rested for a long time. As she floated between sleep and wakefulness, sensations and sounds began to filter into her awareness. She listened to the heart monitor beeping and voices, low and murmuring in anger.

"So there never was anyone else?" It was Charlene, but she sounded frustrated and far away.

"There better not have been or I get dibs." Someone who sounded almost like the girl from Colt's phone answered. "He's my brother, I get to kick his arse first."

"I like her." Meri could hear Trina's grin in her voice. "I glad I'm not the baby in the family anymore."

There was a familiar groan, then Charlene asked, "When is she going to wake?"

"She has improved greatly; her vitals are better than expected. The insulin is stabilizing her blood sugar, but she is going to have to monitor it several times a day for the rest of her pregnancy. She won't be able to be alone until after she delivers. We were lucky Troy found her on Hueneme Beach right after she left for her walk, so she got immediate help. She hit her head really hard. The intercranial bleed was repaired before any damage could occur, but her gestational diabetes will mean she heals slower. Medically, Meredith is better than should be expected," Trina spoke with a calm professional demeanor. "The baby is strong, growing normally. We have to have patience."

Then Meredith heard was the last voice she wanted to hear, Colt's, "But Trina, it's been over a week and she ain't stirred. Every day you tell us she's better than should be expected, but she ain't awake. Is she even gonna wake before my son's due?"

Meri angrily wondered, 'Why he is here, what does he care about me, about us?' Then she realized he said my son. 'How does he know the baby's sex? I don't even know that. It's my baby, he left us.' I grow even more angry. I struggle against my body but grow weaker and sleepier.

"Colt, the doctors are taking every precaution. We have to give her time. She was having a very difficult pregnancy and the news from home will be a shock when she wakes up," Trina sounded so calm as Meri wondered what shock Trina was talking about before her hearing faded and she fell into a dream-filled sleep.

~~~~

Trina grinned at Meri when she opened her eyes. "Hey, look who came back to the land of the living." Trina's voice sounded strange.

"What's wrong?" Meri croaked. Her throat felt dry. She greedily sipped the water offered, not missing the similarity to the last time she woke in the hospital. "I had surgery?"

"You hit your head pretty hard when you fainted. There was a small bleed inside your skull but they fixed it and you'll be fine," Trina spoke so soothingly."Meredith, I need to tell you some very bad news."

Meri's heart leapt in her throat. Her first thought was of Grandma Nina, then a wave of nausea hit, and she had to spend several seconds swallowing to keep from vomiting. Trina held a basin.

"Meredith, are you okay?"

"Uhm, yes Trina, I'm sorry. Is... is it Grandma?" She struggled to get the question out, frustrated.

"No. Grandma Nina is fine, her heart isn't getting any worse. It's... It's your parents and Chuck. There was an accident last night. Hank Richmond called me a few hours ago. The police think they were hit by a drunk driver coming back from orientation at U.C. Boulder, and... Ohmigawd, Meri, I'm so sorry. Their car rolled down a ravine and caught fire. The drunk stopped and then left without calling for help. They found a mostly empty bottle of alcohol by the tracks, but the fingerprints didn't match anything in CODIS." Trina's voice sounded far away as Meri struggled to think of something to say.

Truthfully, she was too stunned to say anything then she blurted out, "I can't believe my parents are dead... And Chuck too? No, not Chuck." Begging Trina to deny it, Meri wanted to shake her head but feared her nausea would return. Tears wet her cheeks as sobs choked her. She never imagined she would grieve the parents who had put her and Char through so much.

"Meri? You need to calm down or they are going to have to sedate you. Breathe, slow deep breaths." Trina's voice became an anchor in the pain.

Looking at her empty wedding ring finger, Meri realized something and stammered, "I never told them I got married and divorced, or that I'm pregnant."

"Oh, I'm pretty sure they knew you were pregnant at Chuck's graduation last month, you're pretty big, but..."

"What?" Meri asked as Trina sucked in her lips, the thing she always did when she didn't want to say something.

"Miranda was mad as a wet cat that you were having a baby out of wedlock. She told everyone that living in Paris and Las Vegas had corrupted your morals. You're such a slut and I'm the slut that led you astray. Mua hahaha."

Trina's creepy villain tone and smirky smile made Meri giggle sadly, but it didn't take the sting out of the fact her mother would rather disparage her to the town gossips, than call and ask for the truth. Miranda couldn't get rid of Meri, Char, and Trina fast enough. Sending them back to Pueblo with Grandma Nina straight from the graduation ceremony.

"Chuck was supposed to come and spend the fourth with us," Meri choked as fresh tears threatened.

"I know," comforting her, Trina held Meri gently until she fell back asleep.

~~~~

Someone held her hand, someone with large warm hands. Meri dreamed of Veil Falls, it seemed so real.

Charlene didn't want Winston to touch her anymore or Katrina, and the eldest daughter begged their parents not to let him hurt Meri too. Charlene's heartbroken plea to their mother to give back the presents Winston claimed he paid for her with, made the Meri outside the memory want to cry. The truth broke them all that day.

It was a few days after Charlene told Meri what was happening, and Meri made her tell them. She had awakened to arguing. Oddly, her father washing his police SUV in the winter then he hooked up the trailer with the police department's snowmachine while Meri watched from her window. Before he left, he went to the fire pit in the backyard where he burned clothes and rags from a suitcase in the firepit. He put water on the ashes then shoveled them onto the bloodstained tarp he used for hunting. He put the bundle on the trailer and left. Her Mom got drunk and was crying downstairs after he left.

The person squeezed Meri's hand and she tried to turn her head. Squinting her eyes, she blinked rapidly. Late afternoon sunshine was filtering through the blinds. The palm trees outside surprised her then she remembered she was in California, not Colorado.

"Meredith darlin', how are ya feeling?" Colt leaned into her view. Her hand touched his face for a moment, then she slapped him.

"Get out," Meri whispered viciously, seeing see his shock as she spat her hatred at him. "Go back to your girlfriend. I won't be your side floozy."

"Meredith, please, we need to talk." Colt looked exhausted, worried, and much older than twenty-six. His coffee-colored eyes looked dull. "There is no girlfriend."

Meri tried to turn on her side and away from him. "Don't lie. She answered your phone twice."

"Your sister said you'd say that. But I swear by all that is holy, there isn't anyone else. We were moving cattle. My sister Leighanne was screwing around when she answered my phone the day you found out you were pregnant. I was sad and missing you and she was trying to cheer me up. I didn't know it was you who called, then I dropped my phone and Sam stepped on it."

Giving up trying to roll on her side, she raised the head of the bed higher. "I don't believe you," Meri said flatly. "And whomever she was said another one of his floozies calling. The picture I saw online may be your sister but who are your other floozies?" Meri demanded, emphasizing the last two words with her fingers.

"Darlin', she was just teasing me. There aren't and never were any other women."

"I...I called or texted like your dad asked. I texted every night for two months, I called every week, and you never called. Why couldn't you call or text me back?" It hurt her to want to know, hurt her heart that she wasn't worth a single call.

"My damned pride wouldn't let me. I felt like you loved everyone more than me. Dad made me understand that it wasn't fair of me to ask you to give up your dreams. Your dreams are just as important as mine. I grew up thinking I would have the same love-at-first-sight as my parents. Mama went with Dad from the start because they had the same dreams. I'm so sorry. I let my pride ruin us." His eyes were so sincere, she wanted to believe him, but she didn't yet.

"How did you find me?" Meri demanded quietly, she couldn't remember if she had blocked her number and location before she walked to the beach.

"The day you collapsed on the beach, your sister called and talked to my sister." He breathed out as if it hurt to say the words, "I thought I'd never find you again after I got those papers. I was so scared when Leighanne told me you were in the hospital. Leighanne demanded we drive straight through but on the way, I called back. Trina told me about your pregnancy complications and that a blow to your head might kill you and the baby, so we needed to hurry. Why... why didn't you tell me you were pregnant? Why didn't you call the next day?"

"I didn't want to be a burden, you left me, and I thought you had moved on." Meri wiped away her tears. "I just called to tell you congratulations on winning the point race and ask if you wanted a divorce. I saw on the ACHA page that you were the world champion."

"Having a wife who turned diabetic during her pregnancy is more important than chasing steak tar-tar," he smiled trying to make a joke.

Meri knew it, but his words shocked her. "I'm not diabetic. What the hell are you talking about, Colt?" Meri began to panic. Diabetes was a terrible disease that meant shots several times a day. Her mother had become diabetic while pregnant with Chuck..

"Charlene said Trina had figured it out before they even got you to the hospital." He stood up, reassuring her, " And Trina said it could be managed. I'll get the doctor. He can explain it."

"Colt..." Meri's voice trembled with her fear as she insisted, "No matter what happens to me, I want them to save my baby."

He bent over and kissed her gently on the lips, before putting his forehead against hers. "Our son will be fine, and so will you," he said it with such conviction that she had no choice but to accept it.

Meri listened numbly as the doctor explained that she would need to be on a special diet, test her blood sugar several times a day, and take insulin for the rest of her pregnancy. There was a type of continuous monitoring and automatic injection device that could link with her smart phone. The device would save her from pricking her finger for blood to test and adjust her insulin dose to what she needed. Their son was already double the normal weight for his gestation, and the doctor told them, Meri would have to have a caesarian section if he grew to more than ten pounds because he was concerned about the damage to Meri's pelvis from her car accident. Colt asked many questions, but Meri couldn't find the words for her fear.

"When can I take her home?" Colt asked, "Can she fly, or should she be driven?"

"What are you talking about?" Meri demanded, "How far is the hospital from Charlene's?"

"We're going home to Texas, so I can take care of you," Colt said it like he thought she would automatically agree.

"No, I am going back to Charlene's, then I am going to Veil Falls to bury my family. I won't move to Texas, I'd rather live in Veil Falls," Meri refused.

"I don't think so," Colt snapped, then looked at the doctor, "Can you excuse us, sir?"

"Please don't upset her too much; her blood pressure is still higher than it should be." The doctor warned as he walked out.

"You're coming to the Lazy K, Meri. That's final."

"Final?" Meri stared at him wide-eyed then all her rage and pain of the last several months exploded. "I am going home and dealing with things there, then and only then, will I even consider moving to the gawd-forsaken end of the earth with you. You left, you never called, you obviously don't want me."

"The ranch is halfway between Abilene and Lubbock, it's not the end of the earth," he huffed. "And I do..."

Meri interrupted, "Look, Colt, I appreciate you feeling obligated to come see me because I am pregnant, but we aren't married anymore."

"Obligated?" He gaped at her, "We are not divorced. You're still my wife, and I'm more than obligated. You can't live alone. You could fall into a diabetic coma if your sugar goes too high or low. And why would you want to go back to that place. Didn't you say you and your sisters hated it there?"

Meri bunched up the blankets in her fists, admitting, "We did, but we need to clear out the house and sell it, then there is Aunt Layne's bakery. It's been rented by a few people then was closed for the last few years. I have to sell it if Trina and I are not going to reopen it."

"You don't need the money," Colt insisted. "We have one of the most successful horse breeding and training programs in the state. And you won't be bored, you'll be raising my son."

"Our son... I'll be raising our son. And if I want my own café, I have to do it. Charlene will need a nestegg when she gets out of the Navy, and Trina has her nursing school student loans. Our inheritance could pay them off and buy her doctorate." Meri looked up at him with determination, and hoped he could see that she felt she wasn't going to change her mind. "Colt, I have to do it for my family and if you don't want to come or wait for me then I understand."

His jaw twitched in the way it did when he wasn't happy, but she could see him thinking about the reasons. He took a deep breath. "I love you, Meredith. I love our son. I'll miss the season and lose my rank, and next year, I'd have to start over completely. All of my hard work would be gone."

Meri looked out the window, "I understand. Just go. Sam and the cows are more important."

"No, Meri... I... I just need to... think about things." He walked out.

A few minutes later, Trina came in. "Hey, cuz..."

"He's going to leave me again," Meri announced quietly. Going from believing he had cheated on her to finding out it was his sister all along, then that she was diabetic, and he wanted her to come home with him, but she couldn't because her parents and brother died. It was all such a rollercoaster. Trina held Meri while I cried, blubbering, "The doctor said I can't... I can't live alone, but Char is gone so much. Colt wants me to move to Texas, he'll lose everything he worked for if he quits competing for the season, but I can't."

Trina shook her head, "Char and I talked about it, you don't have to do it. You can just say screw them and walk away, we don't care about the money."

I shook my head, "No, you deserve everything they kept from Aunt Layne's estate, and Char gave up her college fund for the Navy. I am the only one who got anything out of them."

Trina's mouth made a thin line, and her brow furrowed above her blue eyes. "I'll take a semester off and stay with you. Colt can come, or Colt can go, but between you and me, I think he'll come. Let him go compete because I think he'll come home to wherever you and the baby are. Meri, you didn't see him when he got here. He looked like a man who was defeated. He put his head on your bump and cried. I didn't think cowboys cried, but he did. He really does love you... but... but..."

"But what?" The thought of Colt crying over their son hurt Meri's heart.

"But he doesn't know you at all. Did you even talk before you got married?" Trina frowned.

"We talked a little," she blushed, thinking about what they had done instead of talking.

Trina laughed as though she had read her cousin's mind. "Just wow. All the dating advice I gave you and lust-at-first-sight fried your common sense. Honestly, Meri, I thought you were the savvy one."

Meri could only shrug, "I've dated exactly two men in my whole life before him. One just wanted a fling with a younger woman, one was a stalker, and this one I married on our second week of dating because his horse liked my cookies." It was a lame excuse, but it made her cousin laugh.

"Jeezus-maria-and-joe. Well, I think you and Colt need to talk, and maybe have some couples' therapy. Since you are on bedrest with your nine-pound baby, you will both have plenty of time to get to know each other." Trina grinned, "And maybe you could introduce me to his brother..."

"Cody is here too?" Meri asked surprised.

"Nope, but Leighanne showed me the picture and I called dibs." Trina grinned.

Meri face-palmed, dryly begging, "Please don't use your wanton ways on my brother-in-law."

Caramel hair flipped over her shoulder, Trina's peony glossed lips smirking, "But imagine how disappointed the gossips in Veil Falls will be when you come back all properly married. Someone has to give the gossips something to talk about or Miranda will roll over in her grave. Heck, she might even crawl out of it, and we don't want that."

Meri started giggling; it felt weird to laugh while her heart didn't know whether to break or have hope.